Disclaimer: I do not now or before and most likely not in the future, own Final Fantasy, Square Enix or any of the characters.

Reviews, critiques and flames are welcome. I absolutely love all reviews about the story as it gives me motivation, I use good constructive criticism to help my writing improve and I feed the flames to the fires of my imagination.

A/N: This chapter contains some serious pseudo-science so just go with the flow.

guest review- Cloud should've just said "no" to drugs!

Thanks to my before posting beta Queen of Jokers and my after posting beta SubZeroChimera!

"I will never apologize for being me. You should apologize for asking me to be anything else." -Unknown

Chapter 36

Zack ventured to a payphone way out in sector 4. Looking around as he sauntered over to a bench close to a sorry-looking park, he sat there for a few minutes waiting on the woman on the phone to finish. His nervous fidgeting got him noticed by a couple of people, so sitting on his hands was his next best choice. He wanted to call his parents, but Shinra more than likely had taps on their phone and monitored the mail. What if he went there, he could scope things out, see what kind of presence they had. That can wait until later. Right now he had to concentrate on helping Cloud.

Aerith… he had to get out of his funk. He wanted her for himself, when did he become such a compliant man? He had to keep his focus; he kept finding himself thinking about her all the time now, more now than in the last few weeks. Her hands, soft and tender, around him and her face beneath him. He had to stop this, he was just torturing himself. She would never want him back, why come back to him when she could have Sephiroth?

Finally getting to the phone and dialing, Zack's stomach did a back flip. The idea of calling a man who worked in the lab, then asking him for help sent a chill through him. He remembered him and didn't see him much, but the few times he did, it made an impression. Zack could remember every single face and he likely saw them every night in his nightmares.

What if the man didn't even answer? Would he recognize his voice and not show at all? When he finally heard a man's voice on the other end of the line, it sounded annoyed that he was even being bothered.

Zack put on his best nice voice, "Oh, hi there. I was given your number and told that you could help my friend." He put his hand on the top edge of the phone and rested his forehead on the back of his hand. How could he have let this happen? He promised that he would take care of Cloud, now look at how things were playing out.

The man didn't say anything for a long few seconds, "What's wrong with him?"

"He got tricked and then given a bunch of drugs that screwed him up," He sighed.

"The Spice House?"

Zack's spine straightened, "Yeah. How did you know?"

Another long few seconds that Zack thought would never end, finally ended when he heard the man finally say, "It's not free. 3000 Gil up front."

"No problem, I got money."

Without a pause he said, "Tell me where to meet you."

Zack thought for a moment, "How about the playground in Sector 5."

"Give me two hours," He hung up abruptly so Zack made his way back to the bar.

Tifa had to step out to tend to the bar, so Sephiroth took over. Cloud had progressed to more vomiting and dry heaving. Adding to his misery, he held his head and writhed at the feeling of his head imploding and then exploding. When his nose started bleeding, they had to turn him to his side and keep a towel under his head.

Zack stood in the doorway, "It's almost my shift, so I need you to go get this guy. He's going to be at the playground in Sector 5 in a little over an hour." Looking at Cloud, he sat at the foot of the bed and felt of Cloud's forehead and he had spiked a fever, "I think we are going to have to put him in a cold bath," Zack watched his face. His shoulders would shudder and then his head would jerk slightly. His face looked so different, he hardly recognized him. Dark circles under his eyes looked darker from his face being so pale.

While Sephiroth ran the bath, Zack got him down to his boxers as Cloud looked on with some confusion across his face, "Just like old times huh buddy?" Picking him up, Cloud cried out and his back arched and he almost dropped him, but Sephiroth caught his head and they managed to get him in the tub. Getting a wash cloth, Zack squeezed cold water over his head and chest. He remembered in the lab, when Cloud would get sick, he took care of him then too. He supposed it was just going to be that way, he didn't mind because it was the feeling of being needed.

When Cloud began to shiver and his teeth started to chatter, Sephiroth took a seat on the toilet lid. Cloud opened his eyes and focused on Zack's smile, "Hey Spiky! We are going to get you fixed up okay."

Through his chattering teeth, Cloud asked sadly, "Why did it happen?" Zack had heard him sound despondent before, but it was different this time, his deep blue eyes welled up with emotion.

"Well you left and got kidnapped… but me and Seph got you back," Zack got another squeeze of cold water over the blonde's head.

"Not that. At the lab, did it all really happen?" Cloud's arms wrapped around himself as his shivering increased.

Sephiroth made eye contact with Zack and then the brunette asked, "Remember, Hojo had us in the labs?"

Cloud grabbed Zack's wrist, keeping him from pouring more water over his head, "No! What Davis did. Was it real or not?" His eyes had tears ready to fall and his dark blue eyes began to glow lightly as he searched Zack's face.

Zack hoped that he wouldn't remember, "No, it didn't."

Cloud's eyes narrowed slightly and he took a deep breath, "You don't have to lie to me Zack, I am not a child." His face stiffened looking at each of them in turn, "I don't know what the real memories are and what isn't. The tests that Hojo did to me and Seph were real. So were the injections. Please, just tell me the truth." Cloud's gaze pierced through Zack's heart. He thought that he had gotten pretty good at lying, but for some reason, Cloud could always tell. Now was no different.

Zack glanced down at the floor, "Yeah Spike, Davis was real." Cloud's eyes closed and he turned away from his friends' gazes. Zack could feel the shame waft from his blond friend. It was sticky and just hung in the air and no amount of wind would blow it away.

A few tears squeezed themselves out from the blonde's closed eyes and down his face as he asked, "The fire? Was the fire real?" After a few tense moments that seemed like an eternity, Cloud eventually looked back at Zack as the brunette confirmed with a nod. Cloud took in a deep breath and a few more tears spilled. He grabbed his hand to stop him from pouring more water over his head again, "I killed Charles. I helped you didn't I?"

Zack's face dropped, "Yeah." Zack swallowed the lump in his throat, "Yeah, you helped me. Thank you." Cloud closed his eyes and he slid back down and the shivers got a little worse.

"Zack, I just want it to stop," Cloud chattered out. His body twitched and shuddered from a muscle spasm. He breathed in fast at the pain.

"Me and Seph have a plan. Just hang in there for us," Zack showed a reassuring look and Cloud nodded.

"I'm sorry that I got so mad at you," He closed his eyes again, "I did a little thinking during the couple of days that I was gone. I think we need to talk."

"We can talk later, okay," Zack started squeezing water over his head again.

"I am going to the meeting. I will be back as soon as I can," Sephiroth walked out the door with a quick ruffle of Cloud's hair and as he left the room, he nearly ran over Tifa.

She looked at Sephiroth inquisitively, "What happened?"

Sephiroth took her by her upper arms, "Some things we can't and won't talk about, okay?" He harshly pushed past her.

She turned and yelled after him, "But…"

Sephiroth turned quickly and was in her face before she could blink, "Drop. It."

She jumped at the deepness and seriousness in his voice. She lowered her gaze and put her arms around herself. Quietly to herself she asked, "What meeting?"

Sephiroth heard her and cringed that he had overreacted to nothing, "Sorry Tifa, I'll be back and explain everything later."

After a little longer in the tub, Zack felt of Cloud's head and his fever was down. Cloud was in a fit of shivers and couldn't stand well, so Zack sat him on the toilet lid, "Tifa, could you step out for a minute?"

Not paying attention with the circumstances, she asked, "Why?" Cloud had his arms wrapped around himself tightly and he looked up at her and then back at Zack, his teeth chattered louder.

"Seriously?" He held up the dry boxers, "Come on, when I'm done helping him change, you can come back in."

"Oh! Yeah, sorry," As she stepped into the hall, "I was thinking about something else."

"Hey, Seph didn't mean anything by it okay," Tifa relaxed at Zack's smile.

After Zack helped him back in bed, "Tifa, you can come back in. I know it is my turn, but could you sit with him for a few? He seems like he's trying to fall asleep and Seph will be back soon."

Not long after Zack left, Cloud began to mumble so Tifa leaned forward to try to understand him, "Cloud? I can't understand you. What did you say?"

With his eyes closed, he arched his back and a quick scream came out. Grabbing his stomach and bending into the fetal position, he groaned. His whisper was almost inaudible, "Please, Alana."

Tifa sat back in the chair and she almost started crying right there, but leaned back up to him, "Cloud? Do you want me to get Alana?" Her voice cracked.

He didn't say anything. He rolled over to his other side and groaned. His breathing became a little irregular and he started gasping. Tifa ran out into the hall, "Zack! He's having trouble breathing!"

Rushing past her, Zack grabbed him and yelled, "Spike!" Cloud's face was red and he didn't seem to be getting any air. With a firm shake, Zack again yelled, "Cloud!"

Beginning to struggle, he grabbed at his throat, his eyes got big and he seemed to not be getting any air at all now. Panic lifted his physical strength and he kicked and flailed. That was when Tifa noticed something coming from his mouth, a very small amount. Trying to help wipe the mess up, Tifa got kicked in the hip and she flew backwards into the wall.

Zack got a flailing punch at his throat when he glanced over at Tifa to see if she was okay. Letting out a gasp as he tried to regain his ability to think about something other than the pain in his neck, Zack again tried to flip his friend over, like all the other times he'd had to do this.

As Cloud's oxygen supply diminished further, his flailing got worse. All Zack could do at that point was keep him from hurting himself until he passed out.

Opening his mouth, Zack noticed that he'd vomited and got choked on it. Flipping him to his side, Zack dug his fingers down as far as he could and cleared some of it, but he still was not breathing, "Don't do this Spike!" Trying the Heimlich, it finally cleared his airway. Zack turned him over onto his side and sat back on his heels, relaxing on the floor where they'd ended up. Taking a deep breath, Zack worked on getting his adrenaline under control.

Tifa had gotten up and helped get him back in the bed. Zack made sure he was breathing steadily and got up, "I think I need a nap. Spike, you have to stop choking around me!" He turned to Tifa and breathlessly, "You got this now?" Tifa nodded her head and sat back down in the chair and couldn't stop staring at him.

Sitting at the tiny table in their small kitchen, Cloud watched the walls flow like water, the table rippled as he put his hands down and felt the hard surface roll. Facing Alana, he took her hands into his, silently his eyes begged for her to look at him and once their eyes met, he spoke, "Alana, I really need to talk to you. I don't want to lead you on any more. I really wanted to love you, but my heart belongs to someone else. It always has and I am very sorry for hurting you." Alana started crying and the sound of her heartbreak bounced off the walls and echoed. At Cloud's simple thought to move closer to her, his chair glided around the table and up next to her. Placing his arm around her shoulders, he pleaded, "Please don't cry Alana. Its not Tifa's fault so please don't blame her, blame me. Its my fault for not being strong enough to tell you the truth at the beginning. Forgive me... Please, Alana."

Sephiroth was just out of sight when a man walked into the park. He had a large duffle bag slung over his shoulder. Sephiroth watched him for a few minutes and looked around for anyone else. The man started to look a little impatient and sat down on a bench and rubbed his legs from the cold. Once he was satisfied that the man was alone, Sephiroth approached slowly, "You must be Harding?"

Harding stood up and his face dropped, "Is this some sort of joke?!" He looked around nervously. He recognized him, even with the wig.

Sephiroth looked around confused and seriously stated, "I do not joke."

"Look, I don't want any trouble!" He held his hands up and began to back away.

"Where are you going? We were told to contact you to get help for our friend," Sephiroth stood his ground, "Now are you going to come with me willingly or do I need to use force?" Sephiroth's face did not change in emotion at all. It was a tactic that had served him well in the past. With very little effort, he was able to get confessions, information and even gotten him past some red tape a few times.

"J-Just don't hurt me, okay. I will help your friend, just please don't hurt me."

"Then come with me. Now I assume that I don't need to threaten you on not revealing where we are?" Sephiroth raised one eyebrow, "I do not want to have to hunt you down and kill you. That would take a lot of energy that I am not willing to expend on you." Being able to slip back into his former General mode was a little disconcerting, but it worked.

"Oh, no sir. I wouldn't dream of it."

With a sweep of his hand, "Then shall we go?" The man started walking and Sephiroth walked behind him by several feet. The man was sweating and looking over his shoulder at Sephiroth.

Sephiroth instructed, "Up ahead at the corner, turn left." He kept Harding in front of him until he got closer to the bar.

"Are we going to 7th Heaven?" He asked cautiously.

Sephiroth answered stoically, "Yes."

"I know that place," He was smiling nervously.

"Do not look at me."

Once they reached the door, he opened the door and Zack was waiting. The unenhanced man broke out in a cold sweat again. Zack pointed at him, "You're the guy that I got the keys from in the mansion aren't you? You're also the one in this picture with Tifa."

"Y…yes sir. Please don't kill me."

Zack laughed and then his smile turned to a dangerous glare, "Not until you help our friend, you may remember him as specimen C." The man nodded his head, "Why don't you get to it, and remember that we are watching you," Zack nodded once to Sephiroth.

With a firm hand on the smaller man's shoulder, Sephiroth led him up the stairs. Walking in to the room, Tifa jumped up and looked at him curiously, "Jacob?"

"Jacob?" Zack questioned.

"That's my first name, only people I'm really close to call me Jacob. Most people just call me by my last name," Zack looked at Tifa. She shrugged and dodged his looks. He went in and looked at Cloud, "Wow, how long has he been without Jillian's drugs?"

"Almost 3 days." Zack crossed his arms, "Why?"

"Has he had a fever yet?" Zack nodded, "Okay, we need to mix and heat these things and then get it down him as soon as it cools, ASAP." He gave the small bag of items to Tifa. While Tifa was down stairs mixing the items over the stove, Harding took Cloud's vitals and seemed a little concerned.

"What is wrong?" Sephiroth took a step toward Harding.

"I think that some of what Hojo did is going to complicate things a little," Harding laid Cloud over on his back. He opened his bag and pulled out several items. He went into the bathroom and washed his hands and got his gloves on, "Z… Um, I mean, Zack, could you wash your hands and put on these gloves please?" He rubbed a generous amount of alcohol on Cloud's stomach where one of his surgery scars was. Then took a vial of white liquid and filled a syringe with the contents. He proceeded to inject it into his vein, "This will just relax him a little," He used another syringe and injected a clear substance in several places along the incision and around it.

Reaching down, the physician's assistant pulled out a scalpel, pulling it from the plastic that covered it. Zack and Sephiroth both straightened and started toward him, ready to defend their friend, "Whoa! I'm not going to hurt him, let me show you what I'm talking about. He is completely numb here, he won't feel a thing, trust me." Taking the scalpel he opened one of the old incisions. "The "improved" implant that Hojo implanted either neutralizes or amplifies certain chemicals and if I can remove it, the mix will be able to work better. Can you hand me those clamps right there on the other side of the gauze?" Zack handed it to him and he clamped something inside Cloud's incision, "Because of this implant, the drugs that Jillian gave him had a triple effect. Gimme those forceps," He did a little cursing as he worked the panel loose from muscle tissue and the blood supply.

"Triple effect? How?" Zack looked at Sephiroth and back at Harding.

"It means that a normal dose was amplified, he reacted to the drugs more than normal. The drugs that Jillian puts them on are supposed to keep them calm and increase libido," After some more clamping and cutting, Harding finally pulled the panel out and handed it to Zack, "See, it has a filtration. I'm not sure exactly how it works, but this is it. Could you open the suture kit there for me?" Zack opened it and held it for him to take, "Certain chemicals come into contact with it through the circulatory system and it "amplifies" it. When he got his steroid, mako and enhancer, it amplified the results." Harding paused the internal stitches and looked at Sephiroth, "That is why your connection faded the longer you were away from the injections."

"But he was getting mako when he was in the tube," Zack puzzled and added, "Do you always carry a surgery room everywhere you go?"

Harding started back to finishing the stitches, "It was mostly the enhancer, the black substance. Hojo was hoping to get all three of you to connect with each other and become like "one" super soldier. Or something like that. He babbled a lot. Once the connection was made between the three of you, the enhancer would not be needed anymore," Harding then smiled, "Yes, I carry it around everywhere. You never know when you might need it."

Sephiroth handed Harding a wet cloth to clean Cloud's abdomen. Zack asked, "A super soldier for what or who? Wouldn't he have put those implants in us also?" He covered his incision with bandages.

"How do you know that ya'll don't have implants? Zack, you did get a panel and Jenova implants after the results with project C, but Hojo had trouble with your Soldier resistance in keeping it from integrating like he anticipated."

"Hey, wait just one hot second! When did he implant one of those things in me at the lab? I know when ya'll thought that I was dead he could have, but I don't remember any time back in the lab after Cloud's surgery that I had to witness."

Harding looked up, "One word Zack, sedation. The first one was while both of you were in the tanks, that was a test implant, but then one night while you were sleeping in your cell and Cloud was in the tank, Hojo gassed you and implanted another. He wasn't sure if the first one took because you didn't seem to have any connection with Jenova. The reason you never knew, is your increased healing ability." He raised his eyebrows and Zack rolled his eyes and scoffed loudly and Harding finished, "That was when he changed his directive of the project."

Zack's arms crossed with disbelief, "I don't have any scars from that?"

"Your enhanced SOLDIER healing along with a variety of mixtures of healing ointments helped in the healing process. I know that he had a healing materia also. Super rare materia, I had never actually seen any, but I'd seen pictures. I guess being the head of the Shinra science department does have its perks," Harding followed up by asking, "Did he never mention Destiny to you?" Harding stood up and faced them.

"Is that the winged chick that called Cloud her father?" Zack crossed his arms.

"Yes, but there is something else. All three of you are her "father" because he spliced the DNA from all three of you."

"Then why did she just call Cloud father then, wouldn't she say it to all of us?" Zack raised an eyebrow.

"She only recognized Cloud, because his Jenova cells were communicating with Sephiroth's Jenova cells, thusly communicating with her also. Sephiroth's weren't communicating back though. That is why your connection seemed only one way at times. Hojo really had three different tests going on at once." When Tifa entered, Harding took the bowl and said, "I'll explain after we get this down him. The more we get down him the better. Tifa you want to get a bucket just in case he throws it up?" Harding informed.

Tifa held Cloud's head, "Cloud, open your eyes," Tifa looked down in Cloud's eyes, "Cloud, we need you to swallow this, it is going to burn, but it will help you."

Cloud looked up and weakly said, "Okay," He pushed himself to sitting with his back up against the wall.

At first Cloud squeezed his eyes shut and swallowed it. Evidently it burned a lot worse than Harding let on, judging from Cloud's reaction. Once Cloud got it all down, he rolled to his side and gagged, then cried out in pain, holding his stomach and throat. Tifa covered him back up and stayed in the room with him.

Zack, Sephiroth and Harding stepped out into the hallway and as they slowly walked to the stairs, Harding continued, "Project S was Jenova injections and organic implants, no panel implant. Project Z was no Jenova injections or an implant. Project C was what he was going to start on you two until you escaped. Well he started it with you, Zack." Harding paused looking at their faces, "Project C was Jenova injections with the organic and panel implants. That was the next phase that he was starting." Zack and Sephiroth kept their eyes on Harding as they processed the information, "Like I said, project C was the project that yielded the results that he wanted."

Zack pulled Sephiroth with him as he walked and in an observation he said, "Could Cloud's Jenova cells have communicated with me?" Sephiroth looked at him and the puzzled looks made Zack add, "Remember Seph, on the ship coming here how sick I got and Cloud seemed to not be as sick with his motion sickness."

Sephiroth nodded, "I remember, I suppose from what Harding is saying, that it is possible."

Harding rubbed his chin, "Even if the implant wasn't integrated or dormant, it is hypothetically sound."

Zack crossed his arms, "Leave it to Cloud to make me sick." A sudden thought jumped into Zack's mind. The sight of Cloud scrunched up between the wall and toilet, bleeding, beaten and violated. Zack's eyes suddenly glowed in intense anger.

Once they reached the door Harding waved and said, "Call me if you need anything."

Zack grabbed Harding before he could leave, "I have just one question for you." The seriousness and glow in Zack's eyes caused Harding to almost pass out as the large brunet pushed his back toward the wall, "Why did Hojo allow the guards to abuse us?" Sephiroth stood behind Zack and crossed his arms.

Harding looked back and forth between to the two of them, "Wait a minute. What do you mean "abuse" you?"

Zack pushed him against the wall hard enough that it made the pictures bounce, "I think you heard me loud and clear little man." Zack kept his hand on Harding's chest.

"I'm confused, there was no abuse," Harding quickly regretted saying that when Zack grabbed him by the throat.

Zack never taking his hand off of his neck spoke to Sephiroth over his shoulder. Harding flinched at Zack's angry laugh, "The abuse that we put up with from the guards in the jail cells you little piece of shit."

Harding shook his head, "I don't know anything about that and Hojo would have never allowed unnecessary violence without his consent."

Zack asked Sephiroth without releasing the man, "What do you think?"

"I think he has a point, Hojo was sadistic, but he liked to be the one inflicting the pain," Sephiroth looked at Harding as Zack released him and stepped back, "You will be hearing from us if any Shinra personnel show up here. Get out of here."

Cloud was under Sephiroth's supervision and Tifa and Zack went down stairs. Tifa was upset and the way she was throwing back the whisky shots it couldn't be good. Zack pulled his chair closer to hers. He put his arm around her, "I know shit is pretty rough isn't it."

"It's not just that, it was something that Cloud said before Harding ever got here," Tifa pushed some hair behind her ear.

"What's up? Come on, talk to Dr. Zack," Zack flashed an award-winning smile.

"He asked for Alana," She dropped her gaze.

Zack sat back and took his arm off of her shoulders, "Wow… I don't know… maybe it was the fever or something. I mean he is pretty out of it."

"Maybe I was just hoping for too much or something. I just hoped he would… oh I don't know," Tifa got up and went into the kitchen.

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reads, favorites, subscribes and/or reviews, I appreciate your time and I dedicate all of this to you. To quote another author, "Getting reviews makes me feel all warm and squishy."

Please send me your reviews if you want. It is really easy. Just click your arrow in the little box, write what you thought or felt about the chapter and then click right down there, just below the box. A little lower… a little to the right… yeah, right there! Click it! *grinning*