Chapter 37

Santana's nerves jumped and worry crossed her face. "Um, personal feelings?"

The younger man looked at her sincerely. The silence between then hanging in the air and then he burst out laughing. "Sorry, I couldn't help myself. You know I'm happily engaged."

"And I'm happily gay."

"In all seriousness Santana, we've worked together a long time." Frank said putting his menu on the table.

"You are the only assistant I have ever kept longer then four months and that was three and a half years and two offices ago."

"Exactly and that's why I feel like I should say what I'm about to say to you."

Santana had mix feelings about what was probably about to emerge from her assistant's mouth. It was true they had known each other a long time but there was a respectful, professional distance they kept between one another. Other then when Frank's father had passed away a year earlier their conversations about anything personal had been limited to entertainment choices and vacation ideas. "Tread lightly Frank."

He nodded thoughtfully and paused, forming his words. "You don't seem happy."

There were points earned for the way he said it but it didn't make the observation any less difficult to hear. "Works been busy. Life's been busy and the other evening was a little, shall we say, complicated. I'm sorry if it has made me difficult to work for lately."

"I'm not bringing this up to whine or as a criticism. I'm bringing it up Santana because, although you are my boss, you are also someone I admire. It started before we won the election. You've not seemed yourself."

He was right. She knew as much but hadn't thought anyone would have possibly noticed. Looking back at him thoughtfully, Santana nodded and smiled sweetly. "Duly noted Frank."

The young man nodded in return, knowing his message got through, but that the conversation was over.

"And Frank."

"Yeah."

"Thank you. Now figure out what you want for dinner."

Looking over the menu Santana couldn't really concentrate on the offerings. Her assistant had risked his job by being honest with her. There had been complicated issues swimming around her life since long before Brittany had turned back up in it. In the early part of her career she would have fired him on the spot but Frank had earned the right to speak his mind. She was grateful he had as it made her feel not so alone in the world. The question was what to do about what he had said.

...

"Now that deserves a toast." Samantha said beaming as she lifted her glass. "Brittany it was fantastic and you looked, um, amazing." Brittany blushed at the compliments, which only made Samantha adore her more.

"Thanks Samantha. It means a lot coming from you."

"What do you think? Did it come together like how you imagined it would?"

"It really did. I'm so happy it highlighted Mercedes so well." Brittany said placing her phone back her purse.

"You did a wonderful job."

"I can't wait to share it with the others especially now that I know it's good."

"They are going to be as excited for you as I am."

"It's so weird. So much great stuff has happened in the last year."

"You have had some major life changes for sure." Samantha said enjoying more of her wine.

"Samantha, you know you're a part of that, right?"

Samantha put her glass down. "Of course."

"And that I'm really happy about that."

"Of course."

Brittany took and then squeezed Samantha's hand. "Good. Cause I want you to know that."

"I do."

"Good."

"Good." Samantha agreed.

Brittany looked down at their linked hands. "I think we have wine back at the apartment. Would you like to come over for a little while?"

"I would like that very much."

"Good." Brittany said as she took her glass and finished what remained in it with one last long drink.

...

Singing with Rachel was always so effortless. It was like riding a bike. She was such a passionate, professional, performer. Kurt only needed to follow her lead and go. They hadn't sung that song with one another for ten years, at the very least, and it was still perfect. The audience seemed to think so too. The second the song ended the place had erupted into thunderous applause while his date cried his eyes out. It was in that moment Kurt realized he might have overshot making the evening special. He wasn't sure how he was going to top a duet with, and now a solo from, the Broadway star.

Kurt knew it was best not to compete with a boy and his favorite Broadway Diva so he headed back to the table. He would keep Quinn company while his date sat enraptured by Rachel's talent but his date wasn't the only person preoccupied by the singing. Kurt had caught sight of his stepbrother's old high school girlfriend more then once during the duet and was surprised by what he witnessed. Quinn had never been the nostalgic type but something had obviously changed because by the end of the number she was trying to be stealthy about wiping away tears. Kurt knew, probably more then anyone but Santana, that Quinn had been through a lot in the last year and now faced with her close bond with her best friend melting away he imagined she was fragile and perhaps a little sentimental. When he reached the table she still seemed as distant as she had appeared during the song. "Well, that was fun."

"You sounded incredible together."

"Thanks Quinn. Coming from you that means a lot. I'm sorry the song made you melancholy though."

Quinn looked at him surprised. He had seen her so as if a switch had been flipped her entire posture changed and she stared at him with a large smile. It was typical Quinn.

Kurt took a sip from his drink. "I'm sorry if that was presumptuous of me to say. You just seemed effected by it."

Seemingly brushing off the observation she shrugged confidently. "Memories of another time is all."

"When Rachel mentioned what happened and that you were staying with her and Brittany she also mentioned your divorce just recently finalized. It's got to be hard on some level."

"Not really."

Kurt nodded knowingly. "If you ever need to talk."

Quinn eyed him suspiciously and then grew very interested in her water bottle. "I know where to find you. And thanks Kurt."

"You're welcome."

On cue the piano started up again and the room erupted with Kurt's date leading the charge. Rachel Berry was wowing the room with a song from her show. Before Rachel even got to the first chorus Quinn had excused herself and gone to the ladies room.

…

"You know we could have gone to the show with Quinn." Brittany said as they made their way into the elevator at the apartment building.

Samantha smiled. "So now you didn't like dinner?"

"I loved it, silly. Just didn't want you to think we couldn't have gone if it was something you had wanted to do."

"Brittany, we already talked about this. I loved dinner and there is plenty of time to go back at some point and see Rachel in the show again."

The elevator opened on Brittany's floor and they moved towards the apartment. Digging through her purse Brittany attempted to find her elusive keys. "I know but we could have gone is all."

"You're adorable when you're nervous."

At the pointed statement Brittany stopped looking through her bag and turned to Samantha. "I'm not nervous."

"You're rambling."

"I always ramble."

"No, you don't." Samantha said taking one of Brittany's hands in hers to prove the point. "And you're shaking."

"Okay, so maybe I am a little nervous."

"Why?"

Brittany knew she was blushing. She took her hand back and returned to concentrating on finding her keys.

…

By the time they were through with their entrees the only ground not covered in conversation had been of a personal nature. Santana had decided that it was only polite to be interested in something having to do with Frank's world outside of work. The easiest route was to inquire about Frank's fiancé and she quickly learned the pair had set a date. "Frank, I've been a terrible boss."

Her assistant laughed. "Terrible is a strong word. I like to think of it as 'you have your moments'."

"I'm being serious. I spend more time with you then any other person in my life and it took me until tonight to know that you had set a wedding date?"

"There was no reason for you to know yet. It's not like we sent invitations or anything."

"Still that's something that should have come up. There is professional distance and then there is being too professional."

"I respect how you wish to run your office Santana."

"And it's great that you feel that way but I also don't want you to feel you can't bring stuff up."

"I don't ever want to overstep which was why I was nervous to say anything earlier."

"Frank, you've known me long enough to know I will be the first to let you know if you are overstepping. It's clear though things need to change some around the office. I don't want a daily update on your life but it would be nice, once in a while, to know about the big stuff. Deal?

"Okay, deal and if you ever need to do the same Santana..."

"One step at a time Frank."

...

Quinn had heard the place explode with applause as she washed her hands in the ladies room. Staring at herself in the mirror she took a deep breath and then dried her hands off. Making her way back to the table she passed conversation after conversation of admiring Rachel fans. By the time she reached her seat Kurt and his man friend were having a rather serious conversation near the door and Rachel was putting her coat on. "We off the hook?"

"I have done my 'duty' for the evening."

"Fantastic. I am exhausted. I'll be lucky to stay awake on the ride home."

"That makes two of us." Rachel said handing Quinn her coat.

"Hey guys," Kurt said as he arrived back at the table. "Would it be too far out of your way to have your cab drop me at central park west so I can grab a train to Astoria?"

"Of course not." Rachel replied. "Where did your date go?"

Kurt sighed. "He lives in the neighborhood and I'm being a gentleman and trying not to move things too fast. Tonight was only our second date."

Quinn tried to catch herself from laughing but failed. "Second date? Kurt, you played the Rachel Berry card on date number two?"

"Oh shut up." Kurt dejectedly snapped. At least he was smiling, sort of.

Rachel laughed. "Let's get a cab."

...

Finally getting the door unlocked Brittany wanted to kick herself for letting her nerves get the better of her. Moving to turn on a light she let Samantha close the door behind herself. The answer to the question still unspoken Brittany grabbed a bottle of wine from the small rack on the counter and busied herself opening it.

Having taken her coat off Samantha came up behind Brittany, took the now opened bottle from her hand and placed it back on the counter. She then gently turned Brittany around so they could face each other. "Hey, talk to me."

Brittany's eyes ran from where Samantha's hands were on her arms up to her lips and then immediately shot back down to Samantha's grip as she blushed again.

"Brittany?"

Leaning in slowly, but determined, Brittany captured Samantha's lips with hers in a sheering kiss. Samantha followed suit pulling Brittany close and allowing their lips and tongues to explore one another. Standing in the kitchen Brittany, despite all the questions swimming in her head, was leaping. It felt nice, and warm, and exciting going after what she wanted even if many unresolved feelings and questions were keeping her up at night. Pulling Samantha even closer to her Brittany's hand moved to the small of the older woman's back. Samantha was matching the movements as if the two were dancing. Then as quickly as it had started Samantha pulled away. Keeping some physical by running one hand through Brittany's long hair the redhead took a deep breath and stared at her intensely.

"I shouldn't have done that." Brittany said defeated.

"No, no, Brittany it's okay. In fact it's more then okay."

"But."

"But, I think we need to talk. Why were you so nervous before?"

Defeated Brittany moved past Samantha and down the two steps into the living room. "I am so stupid."

"Hey, don't say that. Don't ever say that." Samantha pleaded as she followed Brittany into the other space. "Just talk to me."

"Things have been so great, and spending time with you makes me so happy but it's been so long, and there is all my baggage but then it boils down to the fact I really wanted you to come by the house tonight, and I really wanted to kiss you but I also don't want to rush things cause I don't want you to think I do that."

Samantha was just standing there smiling and not just smiling but really, really, really smiling.

"What?" Brittany blurted out in frustration.

Samantha led Brittany to the sofa and sat with her. "Take a seat before you try that again without taking a breath and hurt yourself." Samantha smiled warmly and then gently moved Brittany's hair away from her eyes. "First of all, that kiss was amazing. In fact that was more then amazing and if that had happened even only a couple of years ago we would be in your bedroom right now."

Brittany felt her whole body go warm at the thought of what Samantha was implying and it wasn't helped by the fact Samantha had once again taken her hands.

"And as much as I could have easily allowed this chemistry we have take over I think you were awfully wise when you said you don't want to rush things. There's no hurry."

"It's just when I was looking at you back at the bar and you looked so...", Brittany's words shyly trailed off. "You were so sweet to me about the video and it's all I could do not to kiss you right there."

"Which is why you were shaking in the hallway?"

"Yes."

Samantha smiled again and leaned in kissing Brittany on the lips. She took things slow and deliberate until the temperature between the two of them started to rise again. This time it was Brittany who halted things.

"Okay, Samantha, that's not helping any."

The redhead retreated while giving a small laugh. "Sorry."

"But it was nice."

"It was."

"You're right though we have plenty of time. We don't have to feel rushed."

"Exactly."

"Then again what are we waiting for?" Brittany asked honesty without an ounce of intent in her voice.

"I think we are waiting for when the only reasons you are getting butterflies is over the excitement, and not that plus, worrying about the timing, or the baggage, or..."

"Santana?" Brittany knew there was no point in ignoring the obvious.

Samantha nodded.

"Thanks for understanding."

Sitting back on the sofa Samantha reached her arm out. "I'm not going anywhere."

"So in the mean time I can stay curled up in your arms?" Brittany snuggled in next to her, immediately happy as soon as she felt the arm around her.

"Absolutely."

...

It should have been a perfectly romantic evening with his new man and instead Kurt was in a cab with two girls heading uptown. At least it hadn't been a complete bust as the gals had let him hitch a ride north. They were probably shaving at least forty-five minutes off his commute to Astoria.

The ride had been quiet and within twenty blocks from the bar Kurt realized, mid-sentence, he was the only passenger awake. Leaning forward he looked over and saw the two girls curled up asleep. Rachel was leaning into Quinn, who was sitting in the center seat, and Quinn, in turn had her head resting on the top of Rachel's.

In high school this would have marked the end of days but now it actually struck Kurt as sweet. None of them were the insecure, hormonal, teens they once were and it wasn't surprising that as adults Quinn and Rachel had found common enough ground to become friends. On the surface they might have seemed as different as night and day but Kurt knew that deep down they were very much alike. Leaning back and watching the city pass them by Kurt Hummel laughed at the wonderful unpredictability of life.

…

Entering the apartment Quinn smiled at the sweet sight of Samantha and Brittany curled up on the sofa watching a movie. Although she was quite tired there was no way she wanted to interrupt their date by asking for the pullout sofa. "Rachel, I'm going to sit outside for a little while if that's okay."

"Go right ahead. I think I'll join you."

Brittany turned towards the front door. "You guys don't have to leave on our account."

"Enjoy your movie. We could use some quiet night air." Rachel said while making kissing faces at Brittany.

Samantha picked that moment to turn and caught the gentle teasing. "Careful Rachel or I will make you, alone, go through the whole show twice tomorrow before we start a run thru."

"That would be completely unfair of you to use your power over me to keep me from poking fun at you both."

"Completely unfair but also completely within my power."

Quinn laughed at the playful banter and headed up the stairs to the roof leaving the others to continue their fake fight. Going outside she turned the heat lamp on and took a seat in the same chair she had recently fallen asleep in.

Within a short while Rachel appeared in the doorway holding two glasses of wine.

"What's that for?"

Rachel handed over one of the glasses. "Brittany had a bottle open so I figured why waste it. One glass won't hurt either one of us."

"Or it might mean Brittany finds us both out here sound asleep in the morning."

Rachel moved around and took a seat. "That's all you Quinn. I would never manage that."

"All the time you've had this place and you've never once slept out here?"

"Only once and it was completely intentional. The city had a giant power outage the first summer I was in the city and it was actually cooler sleeping outside then it was sleeping indoors."

"Very rustic of you."

"Very necessary. Have you experienced a sweltering New York City yet?"

"When I arrived this past summer I was told that it wasn't too bad but I was also very happy for air conditioning. In Arizona it's hot but it's dry heat. Here it's a whole other story. Last summer being outside was like showering in my clothes." Quinn said drinking from her glass.

Rachel nodded. "Last summer was mild. Imagine that plus no air moving in the apartment."

"Well as someone who has already enjoyed a nap out here I think you have seriously missed out."

"Getting frost bite or waking up to a thunderstorm is beyond my 'rustic' capabilities."

"You've lost your Lima roots."

"Quinn Fabray of the Lima Fabray's is not allowed to lecture me about camping or roughing it."

Debating that pointed comment would have been like lecturing Kurt on men's fashion, a complete waste of time. Quinn smiled instead and took another sip from her glass as Rachel did the same. "It was nice to see Kurt."

Rachel turned in Quinn's direction. "He and I don't hang out nearly enough. It has been mostly a drink after an audition or, on occasion, as my plus one to events."

"So why don't you call him more often?"

"I tried for a while but it seemed like after the nomination last season he pulled away."

"I can imagine it's hard for him but then again he didn't seem the least bit resentful of your success."

"Not at all. It's like having my own private cheerleader when we do spend time together. You might be right, as happy as he is for me he might be just as disappointed about where he is with his career. I just realize on nights like tonight that I miss him."

"Until he reemerges more consistently I'll be your cheerleader. It's the least I can do after you kept me from moving into a hotel. Although I should probably start apartment hunting so I'm not putting you guys out much longer."

"You aren't putting us out. Besides, things with Santana will settle and everything will be back the way it should. There is no point in finding a new place until you've allowed that situation the time it needs to calm and then resolve itself."

"You are far too optimistic Rachel."

Rachel drank more of her wine. "I typically find there is nothing wrong with positive thinking."

"Sure. And I'm positive she's never going to speak to me again."

"Give it time and until then you stay here with us. It's nice having you around." Rachel said turning out and looking at her view of the city.

"It's nice being around." Quinn said looking to see what Rachel found so interesting about the night sky.

For a really long time no words were spoken and then, as if the wind was saying it instead, Rachel softly continued. "In school I had always wished we could have grown past Finn and been great friends. Seems I was too optimistic back then as well."

Keeping her eyes focused on the city skyline Quinn felt awful. "That was entirely on me, Rachel. I didn't, and still don't, let people in very easily. Back in school I wasn't ready to have someone who seemed to know me, as well as I thought you did, get to close."

"What about you and Santana?"

"She was safe."

"Safe?"

"Because she was just as damaged as I was only she acted out for the most part I just…"

"Pushed people away." Rachel said thoughtfully completing Quinn's words for her and then turning in Quinn's direction. "Do me a favor?"

"What's that?" Quinn said sensing movement in the chair next to her and turning to Rachel.

"Don't ever push me away."

It was a soft request and one that evoked something in Quinn that made her, for some reason, want to do exactly what it was Rachel had asked her not to do. A feeling washed over Quinn that was filled with fear. Rachel stared at her intently seemingly begging to know that their friendship wouldn't disappear on her some day. Quinn couldn't bring herself to disappoint the tiny brunette for also couldn't look her in the eyes any longer. Turning back out to the sky Quinn took a breath. "I promise."

AUTHOR'S NOTES: This chapter was super exciting to see take shape. I hope on many levels it's super exciting for people to have read.

"Too often we are so preoccupied with the destination, we forget the journey." …Author unknown.