I know that I promised a lot of you in PM's that the reveal will be in Tobias POV...and it will. I'm just starting this with Tris' POV. Be patient, and you shall be rewarded. Now, without further ado, let me present the long-awaited reveal! For the next few chapters if there is a scene you want in a different POV let me know. I'm going to create a separate story that will be a collection of one-shots that are alternate POVs from this story.
Tris POV
Visiting day has finally crept up on me. To say I'm anxious is an understatement. I wish I had time to talk to Shauna. She always makes sense of things and helps calm my anxiety. I'm starting to get more comfortable talking with her, and I always feel relaxed after our sessions. Maybe I'll see if I can visit her after today. Yeah, that sounds like a good plan.
Everyone else has already left the dorms, leaving me alone with my thoughts. They're probably eating breakfast. I couldn't bring myself to go with them; the thought of eating still makes my stomach curl into knots. I'll have to go down to the Pit eventually, but I dread what I will see. Will there be someone clad in grey? In blue? Multiple people in grey? I would prefer none of the above.
Eric came in earlier warning us not to be disappointed if our family doesn't come, reminding us of Faction before Blood. Honestly, I would prefer no one come for me. Then I could enjoy my day off with Toby like I've been wanting to do all week. It's unlikely though. I guess I'll just have to wait until tonight to talk. I'm worried about that too, what if he asks about Marcus? What if he sees Marcus coming today? It would be disastrous, but it would also make telling him easier. I rub my eyes. Sometimes I'm too much for myself. Visiting day has kept me in a vicious cycle of anxiety for the past week, and I can't wait to get it over with.
I take a deep sigh as I push myself off the bunk bed. Might as well get the day over with. I'm probably working myself up too much; maybe it won't be too bad. I'll be fine as long as Marcus doesn't show up. If he does...I don't want to think about it. The chances are slim though. He didn't visit Tobias, so why would he visit me? It would be too much of an inconvenience for him.
I walk out of the dorms and head to the Pit. My eyes are immediately drawn to Tobias, whose standing against one of the walls at the edge of the pit. He glances up and gives me a small smile, easing my anxiety a bit. I walk down the steep steps towards the ground. People in all different colors fill the floor. Red, blue, white, and...grey?
I walk towards the person in grey, quickly recognizing them as my mom. A bright smile fills her face as she sees me approaching.
"Beatrice!" She exclaims, extending her arms. I fall into them, giving her a quick hug. It isn't every day an Abnegation hugs you. I can only remember hugging her four times in my life, this being the fourth.
"Hey mom," I mumble into her grey dress. The rough material is familiar, reminding me of home. Or what used to be my home anyways. "How are you?"
"I'm doing well, but let's not talk about me today. Today is your day. Tell me how you are doing." Though she says it in a light tone, her eyes portray the real depth of the question. I take a deep breath, a chance for me to gather my thoughts.
"I'm doing alright. I'm pretty high in the rankings, and I've made a few friends," and a few enemies I remind myself.
"And?" She raises her eyebrows and nods to the other side of the room. I follow her gesture and blush when I see Tobias watching us from against the wall. I give him a small wave, which he returns with a nod and a small smile. "You two seem to have found each other quickly. I'm glad."
"He's my instructor, so no one knows about us yet. But yeah, we've found each other. I missed him."
"I know," she says simply. "Have you told him?"
"About what?"
"Marcus."
The name alone sends chills down my spine. I shake my head. "Not yet," guilt bubbles in my stomach. "I will soon. I'm worried about what his reaction will be. I don't want him to hate me." Her disappointed look softens into one of pity.
"Beatrice, he can't hate you. By the way he is looking at you right now, it's obvious he wants to spend the rest of his life with you." I blush, "you're going to have to tell him sometime."
"I know, and I will. I-I have to accept before I can even consider telling others. Or really just him." She grabs my shaking hand in her warm one, calloused from years of community service. "I'm trying though. I've gotten a therapist, she's great. She's helped me a lot."
"I'm glad." Though her words are comforting, her eyes still hold worry. "Why don't you invite Tobias over here? I would like to talk to him." I start to shake my head but stop myself. If my selfless mom will go out of her way to ask for something, who am I to deny it to her?
I turn back to Toby and find that he is still watching us. I shake my head and wave my hand, beckoning him over. He raises his eyebrow in question, and I smile and wave my hand once more. He stands up straight, brushes his hands on his jeans, and begins walking towards us.
His hair is cut shorter than normal, he must have cut it this morning. His shirt is tight, showing off his abs and biceps. I blink and look away, feeling flushed. My mom looks at me with amusement.
"Good morning Mrs. Prior," Tobias says formally, bowing in the tradition Abnegation fashion. Mom bows back.
"Hello Tobias, It's good to see you again." A tight smile crosses his face.
"You too." I hook my arm into his and rest against his shoulder. I feel his muscles relax, and my mom smiles.
"Is there anywhere we could go to speak privately?" She asks politely. Tobias nods, understanding the serious tone.
"Follow me." I let go of his arm, taking his hand instead. "How are you doing Mrs. Prior?"
"I'm doing very well, thank you for asking Tobias. How are you?" He glances down at me, and his smile grows.
"I'm doing the best I have in a while, Mrs. Prior." He steps ahead, and I let go of his hand as he opens a door for us. "After you."
"Thanks," I whisper. He nods and steps in after my mom. The room is dark but lights up as we step into it. It reminds me of the lights in the training room back in Abnegation, how they were motion activated. A few tables sit in the middle of the room, and multiple chairs are stacked along the walls. A storage room.
"Is this alright?" Toby asks. My mom looks around.
"Are there cameras?" Tobias nods, pointing towards the camera in the top corner of the room.
"There are only two rooms in the compound without cameras, besides in the apartments. They are on the other side of the compound though, and no one ever checks this camera. I work in the Control Room, if necessary I can delete the footage from this meeting afterward."
"Thank you, Tobias. I would appreciate that." He nods. "Alright, we might as well get to business." Tobias pulls out a chair at one of the tables, and gestures for her to sit. As she sits he pulls out the next chair for me. I blush, and he lightly chuckles.
"It's way too easy to make you blush," he whispers, causing me to blush more.
"You two are so cute," I blush even more. Tobias laughs and sits down in a chair next to me.
"Thank you, Mrs. Prior. Now, about this business-"
"Please, Tobias. Call me Natalie."
"Alright. Natalie, what exactly would you like to talk about?" She glances at me and raises an eyebrow. I'm giving you a chance to tell him. I shake my head and she sighs.
"I need to talk to you about Beatrice." He gulps, and I shrink into my chair. Not this, not now. She laughs. "Not in that way, at least not yet." She adds. "Before I tell you this, I need to be absolutely sure you are committed to Beatrice, Tobias. That this isn't some fling."
Toby's face scrunches up in confusion. He shakes his head and grabs my hand underneath the table. I give it a small squeeze, slightly worried about the answer myself.
"No ma'am, I can promise you this isn't some fling. I truly believe Beatrice is the one for me. I love her, and there isn't anything that can stop me from loving her." Heat fills my face and I know I'm blushing again. I can practically hear her telling me I told you so. She nods, satisfied.
"That's what I thought," he squeezes my hand again, "Beatrice, I'm going to ask you something. Promise me that you will answer it truthfully?"
"I promise."
"Are you Divergent?" It feels as if Peter just threw me on the fighting mat. All the air is knocked out of my lungs. What do I say? Tori told me not to tell anyone. But this is my mom and Toby. If I can't trust them, I can't trust anyone.
"You can trust us, Bea. We aren't going to tell anyone." Toby whispers, his lips brushing my ear and sending chills down my spine. I gulp.
"Yes," I expect shouts, anger, surprise. Instead, I simply get a nod from my mom.
"I thought so. Alright, Tobias, if I'm correct stage two of training starts soon?" He nods, surprised.
"Yes, ma'am. It starts tomorrow. How-"
"Tobias, promise me you'll watch out for her. Teach her how to make it through the simulations. Delete her footage. Protect her." Her voice is desperate but determined. Tobias nods. A look of understanding passes between them.
"Yes, ma'am. With my life." She nods.
"Good. Beatrice, listen to me." Her warm eyes have turned hard. She isn't kidding around. "Follow exactly what Tobias says. I don't care if you want a better score, you need to stay safe. Stage two is when they begin to look for the Divergents. If you aren't careful they will find you." I nod, and just now realize that I've been squeezing Toby's hand in a death-like grip. I let go and give him an apologetic look. He shakes his head and grabs my hand again before giving it a squeeze. Relieved, I turn back to my mom.
"Mom, how do you know all of this?" I have my suspicions but-
"I was raised Dauntless." She chuckles at Tobias and I's shocked faces. "I transferred to Dauntless after I fell in love with your father. I guess my Dauntless genes were passed on to you." I grin. "Well, your dad is going to be wondering what's taking me so long. I should get going."
"Why didn't he come? Did he go to visit Caleb?" Does he still hate me? No, I remind myself, he loves you. He took you from Marcus. After seven months.
"Your father has been very selfish lately, Beatrice. He didn't want to come with me, he claimed you needed to get used to Faction before Blood." I nod, not even disappointed. A sick feeling of relief washes over me.
"Alright. That's fine." Tobias looks at me worried, but I ignore him. "Thank you for coming mom. I've missed you.
"I missed you too sweetie. I'm so glad you're fitting in. I can tell you belong here. I'm so proud of you."
"Thank you, mom." She opens her arms once again, and I lean into her warm embrace for the fifth time in my life.
"He really loves you, Beatrice, don't keep this from him for much longer. He cares for you. Trust and honesty is everything in a relationship. He's good for you, I approve." I pull back.
"You do?" She nods, smiling. "Good. Do me a favor and be sure to tell him that. I can tell have you and dad's approval is important to him, even if he won't admit it."
"I love you, sweetie. Don't forget what I said."
"I won't. I'll see if I can visit you after initiation. If not, I'll see you next year. I love you too." She nods and giving Tobias and me one more amused and happy look, leaves. As soon as the door closes he turns to me.
"Are you alright?" His change in tone startles me. The way he can change from Four to Tobias in a split second still amazes me.
"Yeah, why wouldn't I?" He shrugs.
"You probably won't see her for a year. Most people are sad when they say goodbye to someone they care about."
"Oh, um, last year we kind of grew apart. We made up and I still love her, but we aren't as close. It's not as hard to say goodbye." Wow, good job at being unsuspicious Tris. Now he's going to ask what made you grow apart. His eyes narrow. He doesn't believe me.
"Ok." A nervous look crosses his face briefly. "Hey, I need to ask your mom something. Do you mind if I go catch up on her real quick? I'll meet you in the chasm later, it shouldn't take long." Confused, I nod.
"Yeah, alright. What do you need to ask her?"
"Oh, um, nothing important. I'll tell you later." The response surprises me. Tobias hasn't kept me in the dark since he told me about Marcus years ago. What is so important that he feels like he has to keep it from me? I'm tempted to pry further, but I hold myself back. It wouldn't be fair, seeing that I'm also keeping something from him. Trust and honesty are everything in a relationship my mother's voice echoes in my head.
"Alright, I'll see you later I guess." His mouth opens as if he was going to argue against something before he made a sound. I smile; the face is quite comical.
"Uh, yeah. Bye." I wave as he leaves, a small part of me concerned about whatever he has to ask mom. He's going to tell you later. There's nothing to worry about.
I still worry.
Deciding to take a walk I leave the room and enter the crowded pit. People in the various faction colors surround me, black taking the majority. I look around in hopes of finding Christina or Will or at least someone familiar. Now that Toby was gone, the fear I felt early begins to creep back, and my breathing begins to quicken. I walk faster and try to convince myself that I'm being completely irrational. Marcus probably has an important meeting today, one that he is attending with my father. There's no way that he would come visit me. He's probably forgotten-
"Ah, Beatrice. I was hoping that I would find you here."
Tobias POV (HAHAHA EVIL POV CHANGE :D)
I haven't kept anything from Bea since that night in Abnegation when I told her about Marcus. I feel awful for doing it, yet I know I have to. She's keeping something from me, I know she is. I'm not mad about it, not really. She has her reasons, and she would only keep something from me if she was scared. Which scares me. I don't want her dealing with that on her own. Not when we are finally together.
I rush through the crowd of people in the pit. The normal black crowds are replaced with specks of white, blue, and the occasional red. I'm focused on finding one grey speck. Hopefully, she hasn't left yet, these crowds are suffocating. It would take her a while to get through. Especially with the Abnegation habit of putting everyone before you, she wouldn't have been able to make it far.
At the edge of my vision, I see a grey robe. Twisting my head around I try to get a better look. There. Across the room near the staircase. I push against the person in front of me, desperate to reach her before I lose her again.
"Hey, mister! What do you think you are doing?" I turn around. A candor man stands behind me, face red. His son stands next to him, blushing.
"Dad, that's my instructor Four. You know, the one who nearly shot that guy in the head."
"Oh, um, excuse me, sir. I apologize." I nod my head in response and turn back to the staircase. I don't need to push anyone else; I'm known, or rather feared, by enough people that they part for me automatically. Normally the power annoys me, but right now I'm extremely grateful for it.
"Mrs. Prior! Natalie!" I call out, rushing towards her before she ascends the stairs. She turns around and scans the crowd, looking for who called out her name. "Mrs. Prior!" Her eyes catch my frantic ones and she pauses.
"Tobias, what do you need?" Her voice is hushed but urgent. "Why aren't you with Beatrice?" Her eyes scan the crowd and worry begins to creep into her voice.
"She'll probably want to meet some of her friend's parents. She'll be alright." Still looking unconvinced, Natalie nods. "As for me, um, I had a few things I wanted to ask you without Bea." She raises an eyebrow.
"Tobias, I already told her that I fully approve of you two. If that's what this is about-"
"I was wondering about-wait, what? You approve?" She chuckles at my shocked expression.
"Yes, I told Beatrice before I left. I assume she didn't tell you. She said you would be worried about our approval, I had assumed when you called me that that was what you were seeking." My eyes widen. Bea had read my mind once again. Not that seeking their approval was something I had been dying to do. Honestly, I hadn't even thought about it until now. I didn't realize how much I had wanted their approval until now. Somehow, Bea knew what I wanted before I even did. Gosh, that sounds cheesy. I bow my head.
"Thank you, Mrs. Prior-er, Natalie. I really appreciate that."
"Of course Tobias. I know you'll be good to her. No matter what you tell yourself, she does deserve you." I open my mouth to protest, but she continues before I can say a word. "But if you hurt her, don't doubt for a second that I won't contact all of my Dauntless connections and make your life a living hell." I flinch. Abnegation don't make threats. If they are breaking the rules to threaten you, you know that they are serious.
"No, ma'am. I wouldn't dream of it." Rather, I have nightmares about it. Thanks for that Marcus.
"Of course not. You're a good man Tobias." Red tints my cheeks. "Now, what was it that you were going to ask me?"
We've moved to an isolated hallway be now. It's a bit narrow, but not enough for my claustrophobia to kick in. A camera is at the end of it, but we stand far enough away from it that it won't pick up any audio, and our images will be too blurry to be recognized in the control room.
"It's about Bea. I'm worried about her. She's been acting weird since she transferred. She isn't herself. I was wondering...is there anything that happened after I transferred that would have caused her to act this way?" Please say no. Please say I'm making this all up.
Natalie stiffens. No, no, no. Please don't say yes. Please don't tell me it's Marcus.
"Yes, there was something," she says hesitantly. I sigh and nod, dragging my hand over my face. "I want to tell you, but I feel like she should be the one to tell you herself."
"Natalie, I would hate to argue with you over this but I don't think Bea is going to tell me. I'm going to find out soon from her fear simulations, and I would rather talk to her about it beforehand than have to watch it unprepared."
"Have you tried to ask her about it?" I nod.
"Yes, but all she says is that she's fine. She's come to practice at 4 am after going to bed at 1 because she couldn't sleep. Only I am up that early, and that's because of my nightmares. You saw her today, she has had those bags under her eyes since she got here. They are only getting worse too." I rub my face again. Watching her struggle through this alone is driving me insane. She won't let me help and it feels like a kick in the stomach every time I see her walk in the training room looking like she has seen a ghost and shaking like a leaf. Whenever I try to hug her she becomes stiff and flinches. When I ask her about it all she says is 'sorry' and changes the topic. I can't do it anymore. I can't." I shake my head and push back the tears that are threatening to spill. I can't cry in front of Bea's mom. I can't. "It's breaking me, Natalie. I can't watch her suffer by herself anymore. She doesn't deserve this. I want to take the pain from her, I want to know what's causing her to be like this. Bea is strong, stronger than I'll ever be. To watch something break her like this and not know what it is...it's unbearable."
Natalie looks at me for a while, and I can only wonder what she sees. A man who is hopelessly in love with her daughter? A mess? Both?
"I think you already know what happened, Tobias." She whispers. I freeze.
"Marcus?" The name is a whisper on my lips. Shivers go down my spine. Please, laugh. Tell me that's ridiculous. Tell me I'm dreaming and that Bea is fine. Tell me it's homesickness, doubt, anything.
For some reason the universe hates me. It put me with an abusive dad for half of my life after my only loving parent faked her death, and now, the one thing that I ask of it, the one thing I beg and pray won't happen, happens.
Natalie nods.