All the Roads We Have to Walk: Chapter Thirty-Six

"Hey." Poke. Nothing. "I know you're in there." Poke again, sharper this time. "Don't think you can hide forever." Glare into the eyes. "Just one peep that's all I ask. Maybe a…um…a wink or…er…flap…" Try a smile. "Please? You did something before, I know you're not just…"

"Sora? Is that you?" Yuna came running in. "Good morning!" She greeted cheerfully. She looked around, obviously expecting to find another person. "Who were you talking to?"

"Oh, just myself." He carefully dropped Valefor onto his lap. He smiled at the girl. "How are you?"

"I'm fine. Are you feeling better now?"

Sora freed himself from numerous blankets and carefully swung his feet over the edge of the worktop. "Yeah, much better thanks." He stretched the arm and leg on his good side, his bare feet poking out in the air. "Hey, why are my feet bandaged?"

"Don't you remember? You cut them on the glass in Halloween Town."

"Oh, yeah." He put his feet on the ground and gingerly stood up. There was no pain, just some mild discomfort. "I suppose I forgot after everything else." He rubbed the sleep from his eyes. "So, where are we?"

"In space. Tifa thinks we'll be at her world soon."

Sora looked a little confused. "But I thought we were going to Atlantica."

Yuna walked alongside him as he began to walk out of the kitchen, his pace necessarily slow. "We were there a few days ago. You slept through it."

"Wow, I guess I am a lazy bum." He blushed a little. "Sorry, I must've gotten in your way when you wanted to eat."

Yuna giggled. "We just worked around you. No matter how loud we were you didn't even stir. Red said something about your body needing the rest."

The lingering ache in his side convinced Sora his four-legged friend was right. "Oh, wait, I haven't given Valefor back."

"It's okay, we can pick him up later. Let's go find out if we're nearly there." Yuna took hold of Sora's hand, guiding him to the bridge. "I've never been stuck onboard a ship for so long. We picked up loads of games and things on Atlantica but it still got boring."

Sora smiled. "Guess I was kinda lucky to sleep through most of it. Do you think I broke any records for longest time spent asleep? Kairi would be so mad at me if she knew I slept for so long."

"Who's Kairi?"

Sora stopped. For a moment all he could think of was how far away she was and how lonely it made him feel to know he couldn't open a door on this ship and find her smiling in the room behind it. But he gathered himself and answered Yuna. "Kairi's…someone very special to me. She's back home, on the world I come from."

"What's she like?" Yuna's childish curiosity was blind to Sora's anguish. "Is she nice?"

"You'd get on with her really well. She's friendly and caring but…" He laughed, the sound a little forced but not as bad as his lonely heart felt. "But she's always telling me I'm a lazy bum because I used to doze off on the beach sometimes."

"If I meet her I'll be sure to tell her about how you slept for days and days!"

"Thanks. She'll never let me get away with it."

"Good! Because even though I had loads of fun games to play and books to read I was still bored without you."

"I'll make up for it. How about we play Tetra Master later?"

"Nah, I'll only beat you."

Sora mocked a glum look. "Thanks."

They stepped onto the bridge and Sora saw Tifa standing with Barret at the helm while Red was pouring intently over some old maps with Galuf making notes every so often. Terra was nowhere in sight – and neither, of course, was Zidane.

"Um, hi everyone."

Four pairs of eyes looked up from various tasks. "Well if it ain't sleepin' beauty," Barret said with a wicked grin. "Good to see yeh awake Sora."

"Feeling better Sora?" Red asked.

He nodded. "A lot better."

"Good," Tifa said, her smile bright with relief.

Sora noticed the bruises still faintly visible around her neck where Zidane had gripped her throat. Unease twisted in his stomach. Was Zidane really lost in that grey place between light and dark? What happened if he fell all the way?

Tifa walked over to him, poking him in the chest once she was within reach. His thoughts tumbled away. "I don't want you giving me any more shocks young man. We'll all go grey if you do."

Sora smirked. "Won't Galuf just go bald?"

Galuf flicked the boy's ears. "Cheeky brat. He's definitely better."

"Are we nearly there yet?" Yuna burst out.

"Another few days to go, sorry Yuna," Tifa said apologetically.

The little girl sighed. "Maybe I should've stayed with Terra on Atlantica."

"Terra stayed behind?" Sora asked, settling himself on the table Red had been working at.

"Yeah, she wanted to help coordinate the relief effort," Tifa explained. "There are a lot of people to sort out now that Hollow Bastion's gone."

"I don't know what to do about that," Sora replied. "It's a frozen world now. I wonder if I can reverse that."

"You won't be trying any time soon." Galuf told him. "The strength of the Heartless there is unbelievable. Barret and I barely managed to hold them off while we escaped."

"And what about Zidane?" Sora asked. "Where is he?"

"We don't have a clue," Tifa said apologetically. "There's been no trace at all. We don't even know if he got off Hollow Bastion."

"He did." Sora was resolute. "He wouldn't just give up and allow himself to die. I know it."

"We'll have a proper look once we got this materia Tifa's after," Barret said. "There's only so many places he coulda run to."

Sora was silent as he mulled things over. He could feel the concern of his friends and their focus on the upcoming task. If only there was some way he could pick up on Zidane's thoughts or feelings. Sora shared connections with many people and the closer the friendship the stronger the bond. He'd never really thought of it beyond knowing such connections existed within himself and the hearts of his friends.

"Whatcha thinking about Sora?" Yuna enquired.

Sora gave Yuna an overview of his thoughts. "I guess I was just wishing I could use the connection I share with Zidane to find him," he concluded with a wistful smile. "That'd make life easier."

Red overheard. "You might be on to something there."

Sora perked up. "Really?"

Nodding, Red paced around a little as he pondered aloud. "You say the heart makes connections."

"Yeah."

"Connections that let you know how your friend is feeling."

"Sort of...but that's kinda easy. Telling how people feel isn't really hard. It's just…I mean, with these connections no-one's ever truly alone."

"Hm." Red's pacing got faster as he got more excited about the idea blooming in his mind. "The question is how to access the heart…"

Sora's furry friend walked round the table several times. Yuna watched until she got dizzy. Giggling she commented, "Red's funny when he's thinking."

"He's making me feel queasy," Sora muttered.

"Hmmm…"

"Round and round he goes!" Yuna sang.

Red stopped. "Sora, follow me. I think I might have a good idea."

Yuna sighed. "Guess we won't get to play any games yet."

"Don't worry," Sora said as he followed Red off the bridge. "I'm sure I'll escape soon!"

Red led Sora to his bedroom where aside from the futon on the floor there was only a desk. Sora sat upon Red's small table after shifting some books out the way. "So, what's the big idea Red?"

Red gave his equivalent of a grin. "Meditation."

Sora looked highly doubtful. "Meditation?"

Red nodded. "I can't think of a better way for you to access the connections your heart has made. Meditation allows you to reach a different state of consciousness so I imagine it's…"

"Meditation?" the boy interrupted. "As in sitting still and doing lots of slow, deep breathing?"

"Precisely."

Sora chuckled, shaking his head. "Red maybe you haven't noticed but the only time I'm still is when I'm unconscious." He noticed he was swinging his legs over the side of the table and stopped, grinning. "See?"

"This may be the best way we can find Zidane. Besides, we've got a few days to kill and you still need a little rest. You won't be able to fight with your side like that. This time will be perfect to spend on learning some simple meditation techniques."

And so Sora began to learn. The first few times were hopeless. Childhood memories of sitting on the beach with Riku and Kairi chanting "Om" reduced him to so much laughter he thought on numerous occasions that his side had quite literally split. Eventually he got past that phase and with the help of Red managed to find a pleasant level of relaxation. Two days later and Sora discovered exactly how to examine his heart. At first his own emotions had drowned out everything else, plunging him into a maelstrom of his own creation. But below it all was a strange sort of glow, like the flicker of flames in a hearth on a winter's night. He focused on it and suddenly a world coalesced around him. He stood in a circular room, surrounded by numerous identical doors. He stepped forward and in that instant all the doors slammed open. Like an almighty wind images, smells, feelings, sounds stormed over him. He saw so many places.

"What…

Places he knew.

…am…

Places he missed.

…I…

Places he never wished to see again.

…doing?"

And places he'd never known before.

Then it was over.

"Sora?"

Blinking hard several times Sora came to realise he was still seated in Red's room. He looked at his friend as he tried to catch his breath. "That…that was…" He uncrossed his legs and fell onto his back. "Whoa."

"It worked then?"

"Oh yeah. I saw so many places." He grinned and laughed in amazement. "So many worlds!"

"And what of Zidane?"

"I'm not sure. I think I heard him…maybe." Sora offered a nervous smile. "I kinda have a bad habit of hearing voices though."

Red shook his head in amused exasperation. "Anything else?"

"I saw a lot of places I don't know – places I know I've never been to."

"Well maybe I know some of them. Maybe together we can come up with some locations."

Sora sat back up. "Okay. There was one I'm pretty sure was an island. There were lots of waterfalls and a village. Um…oh yeah, there was a massive temple in the village."

"Hmm… I wonder if that's Yuna's world."

"Really? Why would I see that when she's here?"

"Well, if someone's passionate about their home it would've left an imprint on their heart. Plus you were focusing on seeing other worlds and maybe that's how you…"

Sora waved his hands. "Whoa whoa that's enough thinking. Next world."

"Of course. Carry on."

"I also saw this huge castle…somehow I knew it was really windy."

"Sorry don't know it."

Sora's brow wrinkled with concentration. "Green. There was a flash of a place that was just really green and kinda sparkly."

Red's ears twitched. "That sounds like my world."

"Your world is green and sparkly?"

"Part of it is."

"Part of it?"

"It's complicated."

Sora shrugged and moved on. "Oh and there was one with this huge building that was moving across the sea. Seriously, it looked like…I dunno…like the castle at Hollow Bastion surfing over the sea. Not that the building looked like Hollow Bastion but that's the best comparison I can come up with and oh maybe…"

"Stop. I don't know it. Any others?"

"Yeah one more. There was another castle and it looked as though a huge sword was sticking out of it."

"That's it! That's a place on Zidane's world. He told me the name…oh what was it? Er…"

"But that doesn't really mean anything. I saw other worlds I know nothing about. I saw your world but we aren't there yet. All in all that's a lot of places for Zidane to be."

"It doesn't matter, it's a place to start. Zidane's world isn't too far away from our destination. Good work Sora."

He smiled proudly. "You're welcome."

There came a knock on the door and before anyone could call "Come in!" Yuna burst through.

"We've arrived!" she cried excitedly. "We're finally there!"

The three returned to the bridge just as a new world loomed into view. Tifa turned to Red. "Welcome home," she said, trying to sound cheerful but looking like she would burst into tears.

Red's eyes surveyed the world, his expression one of deep unhappiness. "It's more desolate than before."

"Ain't it?" Barret murmured.

Galuf chose to change the subject. "Tifa didn't you have something you wanted to tell Sora?"

"Hm? Oh yeah of course." She pulled her eyes away from her home and turned to Sora. "Do you remember on the charts Red showed you in the library the black ring around Destiny Islands and Disney Castle?"

"Yeah. We can't get through until the Heartless have been weakened."

"Actually we don't think that's true."

"Huh?"

"We got a call from Terra about two hours ago. She said a ship passing by Traverse Town accidentally went off-course and came to where the Heartless defences were supposed to be. They weren't there."

Sora's eyes widened. "You mean we can get to those worlds?"

"No. There's something else in the way."

"Something else?"

"A barrier…a shield. Something only magic can take down."

"Any idea what that magic might be?"

"Terra seems to think that if the Heartless are the spawn of darkness only a spell like Holy could disperse it. But Holy is a magic only special people can summon. It takes phenomenal energy to cast – more energy than any human being could muster."

"No it doesn't!" Yuna was almost jumping up and down in excitement. "I've seen people on my world use Holy."

"As have I," Galuf responded.

"Really?" Red's tone was full of fascination. "Is it still powerful?"

"Yup! One of the most powerful," Yuna answered.

"Amazing. Utterly amazing. Who would've thought such magic…"

"I have no idea what you're all talking about," Sora butted in.

"Holy is the most powerful white magic," Yuna told him. "It's really cool! Someday I'm gonna be able to use it."

"But on our world it took the whole energy of the planet to summon," Tifa said. "Surely it can't be the same magic."

"I don't see why not," Red replied. "Yuna said it was the most powerful white magic…that's the same for our world."

"Mine as well," Galuf said. "But where can any of us learn it?"

"Terra didn't say," Tifa said. "Look, let's worry about it later. For now let's pick up the materia I want from this world, find Zidane and then worry about the barrier. Sora, what can you tell us about Ansem?"

He started in shock. "When did you…?"

"Red told us."

"Oh. Well…Ansem was once the ruler of Hollow Bastion. Then he discovered the Heartless. That's when things went wrong." Sora quickly gave a detailed lesson on Ansem and what he had done after giving himself over to the Heartless. "I don't understand why he's here or what he's done to the worlds but I think I know where he is."

"Where?"

"Disney Castle. I…" Sora knew he was going to sound crazy but it was the truth. "I keep dreaming about it. I've never been there but two of my friends are from that world so they told me everything about it. I know that's where Ansem is hiding."

Oh, hardly hiding.

"Maybe that's where Donald and Goofy are too..." Sora said, mostly to himself.

"You think we can take 'im out?" Barret asked.

Sora's grin was lopsided. "If I did it once I can do it again."

Such confidence. Or is it arrogance?

"Once our other problems are sorted we'll find a way to get to Disney Castle," Tifa said. "Until then everyone get ready for a lot of wet weather and a lot of fighting. Sora, you sure you're up to it?"

He nodded. "I'm feeling fine now thanks."

"Good. Okay then, we're landing. Barret, take us down."

"Heh, aye aye Cap'n Tifa."

The rain played a solemn tune as it tumbled from the sky and crawled down the ruins of Midgar. The industrial city still spanned miles but it was little more than a wasteland. What had once been a thriving if corrupt metropolis had become a ghostly junkyard with mounds of ruined buildings and infrastructure strewn as far as the eye could see. Life no longer remained in this place, its heart lost with its people. Above the wreckage on the ground should've been Midgar's upper level – the plate that had once caused so much pollution in the sectors below. But it was gone, torn away by Meteor, Barret said. Instead all that remained were the huge concrete stanchions, massive steel cords jutting out the manmade corpses. The Mako Reactors – six of the original eight – were in varying states of collapse but none would ever sap the Lifestream again and bring light to the dead city. Sora looked at the old abandoned city sadly. The rain made Midgar look as though it were crying.

"That's where we're going," Tifa said pointing towards Midgar's rotten core. "You see that tall building there? The one that sticks out over everything else in the centre? That's where we need to go."

The former ShinRa headquarters stuck out over everything else simply because it was the only thing left standing that still managed to resemble a building. The highest floors were inaccessible – several precariously hung over another sector of Midgar, connected to the rest of the building by sheer luck rather than clever construction. Tifa wasn't worried because she knew their destination was low down. She and Red stood together beside the ship, going over maps Tifa had hastily scribbled out. Barret had landed on the city's limits, the only place where there was enough empty land to put the ship down without causing any damage.

"We'll be moving out soon," Tifa said. "Yuna, you'll stay here with Galuf."

"Can't I stay outside for a little while?" the girl pleaded. "I've been inside so long!"

"You can stay out as long as you like but if the Heartless come you get inside right away, promise?"

Yuna's smile was bright and she nodded enthusiastically. "Promise!"

Sora pulled his hood down and tilted his head back, enjoying the feel of the cold water on his skin after so many days cooped up inside. Dressed in boots, baggy trousers with enormous pockets and a thick jacket he was nice and warm despite the miserable weather the poured relentlessly from the ironclad skies above.

He heard a giggle and a splash. Looking to his left he saw Yuna twirling in and out of puddles gleefully. He smiled as he watched her exuberant performance. She didn't seem worried or scared about any kind of danger. It made Sora happy to see her so carefree – just as she should be. When he'd been her age his most pressing concern had been making sure he avoided eating vegetables. A little girl, Sora decided, shouldn't have to worry about the Heartless. Someday he hoped he could free her and every other person – child and adult alike – from the worry of the Heartless. Maybe he was one of the few who could.

"It's great to be off the ship!" Yuna grinned when she noticed he was watching her. "I don't think I've ever been so bored in my whole life."

He laughed as he shook his thoughts off. "I know what you mean." Hands in his pockets, yes somehow he had managed to not lose Oblivion, Oathkeeper or the Ultima materia, Sora walked over to her. "I'll never complain about travelling after this – nothing could be worse."

"Totally!" Yuna spied a new puddle and threw herself into an almighty leap.

Sora realised what was about to happen too late and before he could save himself Yuna had drenched him.

"Hey! I'll get you for that!"

With a shriek Yuna bolted, giggling so madly she barely managed to run in a straight line.

"Play nice kids!" Barret hollered jokingly.

"Don't go too far into the city!" Tifa called with motherly concern.

Sora's longer legs ate up the ground between them. Yuna ducked behind a pile of scrap metal. Her giggles echoed all around the dead space, disorientating Sora. A spike of unease slithered through him as the seconds went by and Yuna didn't appear. Towering monstrosities of aging, twisted metal groped for the grim sky. Every now and then the wind went screeching through the ruined chunks of what had once been a massive city. This wasn't the place to play hide-and-seek.

"Hey Yuna, come on, we should get back to the others."

"Uh uh, I won't fall for that."

She sounded close by but her voice had become a game of throw and catch for the wind and ruins. Sora didn't know where she was. "Yuna I'm not joking. We should go back before the Heartless come."

Yeah, this is no time for games.

"But…but Sora…" The fear was creeping into her voice.

"Yuna?"

"I don't know where I am!"

"It's okay," he kept his voice loud but reassuring. "Just keep talking and…"

Yuna's piercing cry hit the air. Sora ran forward, feet taking paths as they came without thinking where he was going or how he was going to get back. Yuna wailed again. Stray metal, bolts and other wreckage that could've been the remnants of homes or shops threatened to trip Sora but he kept his balance, never stopping for a moment.

The chill in the air was too familiar. He had no time to slow down.

"Sora! Where are you?"

"Don't worry Yuna I'm coming!"

"Hurry! The Heartless are…" The rest of the words were lost to a scream.