Osaka walked into the strangely smelly world of Kaorin's apartment. She needed a moment for her eyes to adjust to the dark, basement like light levels before she noticed Kaorin seemingly comatose on the couch. It took a moment for Osaka to wake the woman up. She had been in a sleep so deep that even a punch in the stomach hadn't produced any result, and that punch to the face probably just knocked her out.

"Oh crap this is taking forever!" cried Osaka. She then forced Kaorin's sleeping form to hit herself indefinitely in an attempt to get her to wake up from the deep slumber. "Now how will I ever tell her that Sakaki wants her to be her girlfriend?" Then when Kaorin began to snore Osaka realized just how tired she really was, for some reason. I mean it's like Rip Van Winkle over here.

Then Osaka's eyes filled with panic at a new idea. She noticed that Kaorin's snoring body was oddly cold and clammy. There could be only one explanation for why she was in this state.

"Oh my god," said Osaka, "she's become a Yomi!"

"Goddammit I'm fine!" snapped Kaorin as she furiously awakened. "And that doesn't even make sense. How can someone become a Yomi?" she asked in irritation.

"Legend goes that it's an unholy combination of an overly hormonal, self conscious otaku and a 15 year team Edward fanatic, trapped in the body of an average, apathetic undergrad," Osaka explained.

"I know what one is," Kaorin said rolling her eyes, "but you can't become a Yomi, you're simply born into existence as a Yomi. That's like saying Goku can beat Superman."

"But Goku can beat Superman," said Osaka, "I mean he's a super saiyan."

"But Superman like punched a planet or something or got like thrown into the sun and just became stronger from it. There isn't a DBZ character ever made that could do that."

"Do you think Kid Buu could have lived in the sun?"

"I don't know," said Kaorin, "maybe. But I still don't see why you say I've become Yomi, how insulting."

Across town in an average apartment Kagura and Sakaki were busy trying to figure out why their electric bill was maxing out at an insane price point. This wasn't helped by the fact that Sakaki was the only one who ever paid for the apartment's upkeep. They were nearly at each other's throats.

"I don't care how scary you think the dark closet is!" Sakaki snapped. "There's no reason for you to keep a flood light on in there between 12 and 7 AM. I mean that's just ridiculous!"

"But do you know how many monsters from the closet related deaths occur every century?" Kagura asked in an exasperated voice.

"Zero."

"That's only statistically accurate!" the tomboy snapped. "Everyone knows that vile creatures lurk in dark, dusty places."

"Kagura those kinds of things aren't even real," Sakaki moaned. "How can you honestly expect there to be various types of goblins hiding under your stinky clothes and worn out shoes?"

"I guess you have a point," Kagura conceded. "But I demand to at least have a single incandescent bulb planted in the middle of the closet ceiling on during those hours." The look of dismay on Sakaki's face made Kagura present a different proposal. "How 'bout a fluorescent?"

"Look," said Kaorin, "I was just really, really tired."

"But then why was it so dark in here?" Osaka asked her. "I mean it's the middle of the day after all."

"It's just dark in this apartment complex," she replied, "I don't know what else to tell ya. And, why did you come here anyways?"

"I can't really remember," said the semi spacey woman. "I think it had something to do with Sakaki's boyfriend or the time you and Tomo decided we should prank Kagura by having the police kick down her door."

"Wait a minute. We never suggested that as a prank. I wanted to stick a pumpkin in her closet that howled every so often. Then Tomo wanted to put some kind of Lord of the Rings prop in there that glowed red in the dark," Kaorin replied to correct her friend's train of thought. "As for Sakaki's boyfriend… I don't think I've met him. But oh my god, Yomi just kept going on about how much she hated him. I mean it was almost as bad as having to hear her read some of that emo poetry she likes to scribble."

"It kinda makes sense that she would hate him," said Osaka. "Or anyone that Sakaki was dating for that matter."

"I wonder what Sakaki's boyfriend is like," Kaorin said. "I mean he could be super hot, or a complete dive. But Sakaki would never have such poor taste in anything!" the woman quickly asserted.

"Before you go all fangirl over Sakaki," Osaka started to say in response, "you do know she's not perf—"

"She is beyond the form of perfection that the human mind can even hope to conceive!" Kaorin yelled, as Osaka cowered during this outburst. "You're only saying that because you're just jealous that you can never reach such levels of human excellence!"

"You're kinda freakin' me out here," Osaka said as calmly as she could. "Maybe we can change the subject or somethin'?" she pleaded.

"Okay," Kaorin said, "but only if you never even dare to think that tripe you were about to say." When Osaka didn't seem to disagree, Kaorin's anger began to subside. "Do you think we'll ever invent spaceships that can fly among the stars?"

"Why are you asking that?"

"Because I always wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid," Kaorin said with glee. "I dreamt I would go into space and find all the pretty people. Then in middle school I wanted them all to be my boyfriends and or girlfriends. Now I just want to pay the rent, but I'm still maintaining that devotion to astronomy through Google News."

"Why did you want all those people to like you?" asked Osaka.

"I was really bi-curious back then," Kaorin answered. "Now I know I would totally hit on anything sexy, within reason of course."

"So no hookers?"

"No hookers," the woman confirmed. "Let's just say that there are some sensations their services provide that you just don't want to feel down there."

"I think we should probably change the subject now," Osaka responded.

"Good idea."

"But there was a monster in it only a few nights ago!" Kagura told Sakaki in a panic. "I mean it was lit up in a red light and I cowered under my sheets until I woke up after passing out from sheer terror! It had a goblin's face and just stared at me for who knows how long."

"Kagura," said Sakaki in total despair, "there wasn't anything dangerous in your closet, only this." She reached under the coffee table and retrieved a mask with a light in it.

Kagura stared at it for a moment before she suddenly snapped, "who put that in my closet?"

"No one put it in there, you probably just forgot that you'd set it up or something."

"If I'd set it up then I wouldn't have wondered what the hell that thing was!" she cried out. "I mean how stupid do you think I am?"

Sakaki rubbed her eyes with her right hand. "Well if you didn't put it in there who did?"

"It was probably you!"

"No, I was just cleaning out your filthy closet, as you snored like a dead bear, when I found this stupid thing." Sakaki took a moment to sigh. "Can we focus on something more important right now?"

"Fine," said Kagura. "At least you're being nice today."

"I'm like this almost everyday," Sakaki replied in an irritated voice. "I only get nasty when someone does something to piss me the fuck off," she explained. "So now do you see why I've been 'a bitch', according to you?"

"You never used to get pissed off."

"I used to get pissed off all the time at the shit you people did," Sakaki corrected her. "It's only been until recently that the sheer accumulated volume of seething rage can be expressed."

"It sounds like you need a counselor," Kagura replied.

"Or maybe you just need to think a little more before you decide to eat the leftover curry I'd been saving in the fridge."

"I didn't see your name on it."

Sakaki had been trying her best to contain the anger building up during her conversation with Kagura. Now as they continued to argue over who was "most wrong" in screwing up the apartment, she had almost reached the tipping point. Thankfully before she managed to do so Osaka had dragged Kaorin over.

"What are y'all arguin' about?" Osaka asked as Kaorin tried not to fall asleep on Sakaki's couch.

"Some assholes put a monster mask in my room!" Kagura complained.

"Y-you don't say," said Kaorin as she woke with a start. "That's…weird."

"When I found out who did this I'm gonna beat the crap out of 'em!" the tomboy yelled.

Kaorin needed a moment to fully comprehend the situation because of her lack of sleep. She then proceeded to do the only logical thing in that situation. Rat on her fellow conspirators.

"Tomo and Osaka did it!"