"Let's walk through that one more time. Just to make sure I've got this all right."" Coulson was clearly frustrated, but so was Natasha. The three of them had been sitting at their kitchen table for like three hours while Coulson tried to sort out the details of Natasha's operation.

"You found out that Milligan was smuggling immigrants into the country, and instead of notifying SHIELD, you thought you would just deal with it yourself?"

"Yes."

"So you hacked SHIELD databases to find the location of Milligan's operations?"

"Yes."

"Then you sent Clint to go deal with that, killing five people, while you and an untrained, unstable man went to go get the money Milligan took from them?"

"The aforementioned man then pulled a gun on the man you were supposed to gathering intel on?"

"Yeah."

"So you pulled your weapon and took three men hostage, shooting two of them?"

"In my defense, I did patch them up later."

"Crudely."

"Sorry the stock of medical supplies in an office building were a little lacking." Coulson narrowed his eyes at her sarcasm, he was in no mood to deal with this.

"Regardless, you took three men hostage?"

"Yes." She admitted reluctantly.

"While they were being held up by you, you managed to figure out that Milligan kept the money in a floor safe. And, you figured that the rational course of action was to make a bomb out of a toaster and blow a hole in the floor? How did you even make a bomb out of a toaster?" This is the third time they'd gone over this, and Coulson lost is right around here every single time.

"It's actually pretty easy. You just..."

"I don't wanna know, Romanoff." He cut her off. "You blew a hole in the floor, pried the safe open with a golf club, and basically created a huge mess. You managed to do all of this while convincing Claire that her husband was a lying scumbag so you could use her to pin the hostage situation on him, pulling off a heist technique that's never actually been done successfully?"

"It's really all about timing, really." She tried not to sound to proud that she'd managed to get the police to believe it was Milligan behind the whole thing. Though a lot of the credit had to be given to Claire, who played a key role in selling their story.

The real hard part was convincing Claire to help her, and that Milligan was the bad guy, not Natasha. At first Claire was unwilling to cooperate, she'd found out that Natalie wasn't Natalie and that she'd been lied to by someone she thought was her friend, thought she trusted. Natasha had to worm a confession out of Milligan by playing on his hot temper to get Claire to believe her.

The thing about Claire though, is that she quickly pulled herself together. She'd been betrayed and lied to, her life and the life of her children had been threatened more than once, by all accounts she had the right to be an emotional wreck. But she wasn't, Claire was stronger than that. Natasha remembered how'd focused she'd been, how intently she listened to Natasha's plan, and how easily she went along with pinning her husband as a deranged and violent man. Claire was angry and hurt, but she was fierce. Natasha liked her.

"You just have to get the gun in the other hand at the time of the breech. It's tricky, but you can make it work." Coulson cut her off with a pointed look.

"Romanoff, you blew your cover and this mission with this stunt of yours!" He shouted at her, Natasha kept her face in it's usual blank mask because, if she was being honest, she really didn't care about a damn thing Coulson was saying right now.

"Could you just shut up, Coulson?" Now it was Natasha's turn to snap.

"You want to run that by me again, Agent Romanoff?" Coulson was one of the few people who didn't back down from Natasha. Not that she'd tell him, but she did appreciate that about him, the usual sheepishness of the other agents got on her nerves at times.

"Yeah, Agent Coulson. I asked you to shut up." Clint didn't think this was going to end well.

"It's amazing how you can make my title sound like an insubordination. Something you picked up from Barton?" The tension between them seemed to dissipate when Natasha smiled at Coulson with one of her rare, genuine smiles. Few were immune to that smile, and Coulson was not one of them.

"Natasha." His voice was almost pleading as he took the seat across from her. "Why? Just answer me that one question."

"Because I know SHIELD wouldn't have a done a damn thing." She wasn't frustrated or even mad, just sort of resigned to it.

"And that's supposed to mean?" Clint asked when Coulson did nothing but stare at her.

"It means SHIELD's not the good guy. They're just a guy." She tried to explain. "They're not about solving all the problems, they're not about world peace, they're about balance."

"Balance between what?" Coulson was still silent.

"How have I figured this out before you?" Sometimes she wondered how he had survived this long. "Balance between the good and the bad. You can't let the bad overrun the place, they'd squash everybody. But, you let in too much good, what happens to the underground economy? What happens to SHIELD when there are no more bad guys? It's just about keeping the fulcrum in the dead center." She shrugged, as if it meant nothing. Clint kept his face as blank as hers, unwilling to show any emotion over this.

"Natasha, that's not true." Coulson told her, not quite believing the words he was saying.

"Yeah it is." She countered. "But, it's better than the alternative so nobody does anything." Clint saw the slight twitch in her face at the thought of the 'alternative', but he doubted Coulson picked up on it.

"Natasha..."

"Look, Coulson, save the speech for somebody who cares." Natasha's frustration was now getting the best of her. "I'm sorry about the mess, bill me for the cleanup, but in the end we both got to a desirable outcome. You wanted Milligan to be a non-issues, he is. You're welcome." On that note she shoved away from the table and left, leaving Clint alone with Coulson.

"You two will be returning to New York in the morning. Have the basics packed, we'll take care of the rest." Then Coulson was gone too.

24 hours later both agents were alone again, each in their own places. Clint had moved out of Bobbi's and back into his own apartment before they left for New Mexico, so he still had a lot to get settled, but Natasha was glad to see everything was just as she'd left it. The eerie silence that greeted them was unsettling, they were both so used to the presence of their partner.

Natasha once found the silence comforting, she once looked forward to it. The silence brought her calm and control, she once craved it. Without Clint, the silence felt empty, unsettling.

Clint was worried by the silence. Silence meant he was alone, meant Natasha was alone. The thought of her alone had him pacing the floor of his apartment until right around three in the morning. Right around the time she called him.

"I just got called in." Her voice was stiff.

"For what?" Calling her in so soon after getting back? That was unusual.

"Wait, you didn't?" She was going to strangle Coulson. He told them that their partnership was reinstated, if he thought he could get away with lying to them, he had another thing coming.

"No, Nat. What's the op?"

"I don't know, just said to report. I'll call you when I know."

Except she didn't call him, and she wouldn't either. This wasn't a mission she cared to share.

This was personal.

"Agent Romanoff, this mission is highly classified." Coulson's start was promising. "I recommended you for this, but know that you can always say 'no'. This is your choice Natasha, I wanted to give it to you." The amount of concern in his voice made Natasha a little suspicious, but she let him usher her through the door anyways, unsure of what was on the other side.