CarlyJo: Oh good, I'm so glad. Enjoy this next chapter, and thank you for the review

g: Just wait and see, my friend, wait and see

All The Pretty Horses: My condolences, I'm so very sorry to hear that. I hope things are a little brighter for you, because you're right, it's difficult whether you know or not. Thank you for sharing that with me, and if you need to talk, send me a PM

The Queen of Confusion: Here is more, enjoy!

loretta537: You touched on all the things that the Ministry of Magic didn't take into account. Unfortunately, if that was all included in the story, then there would be no controversy, and thus there would be no story. I appreciate that you took so many things into account and took the time to look for these things, and I will try to incorporate some into the story. Thank you for the review.

valabo: I have no idea how long the story will be. It will finish when the characters tell me it's time to wrap it up. Thank you for the review.

A/N: This chapter is currently unbeat'd, so all mistakes are mine, and feel free to leave a review, the door is always open

ooOoo

I know you can feel it, you're already there, asleep underwater, just screaming for air, I know you can feel it, you're already… don't you know we're freaks and creatures, wake up I can almost see the light. I think we're alone here, you and I, I think we're alone and wondering why, I think we're alone here, you and I. I think we're alone, in the universe tonight.

Alone in the Universe- David Usher

ooOoo

Allison bade Severus goodbye the following Friday, and walked toward the church. She swallowed nervously as she pushed on the doors and stepped inside.

There were garish bouquets of flowers adorning the altar, and family photos on the steps. Other than the fact that the flowers seemed to make a mockery of her father, it wasn't half bad.

Excepting the fact, of course, that her mother had completely disregarded her father's wishes and gone full out on a funeral that meant nothing to either of them. The pews were practically empty, with really did nothing but show just how alone her family was. She couldn't see any of her aunts and uncles on her father's side, and no one on her mother's side would have shown up, she knew that much.

"Oh Dad…" she whispered to herself. "You deserve so much more than this."

It was then that she felt someone's hand on her shoulder. She wasn't sure who it was, the only person she didn't wish to see at that point was her mother. Jorja had been absolutely horrible to her for years, and to see her father being laid to rest in this barrage of flowers and a priest and all sorts of things that he'd never approved of or even talked about made Allison sick.

As disgusting as she found the whole thing, Allison would bite her tongue. She'd play nice with her mother, pay tribute to her dad, and then they would both get on with their lives. Allison would go back to Severus and continue to rebuild her life with his support, and she could care less about what Jorja decided to do. For all she knew Jorja was perfectly content to let her father go without so much as a goodbye, thanks for being a good man.

"Allison…"

Of all people, it had to be her.

"Yes Jorja?"

The response had nearly rendered her mother speechless.

"Don't call me that, I'm your mother, I deserve some respect."

She could feel her fists clench as she turned to look Jorja in the eye. The sight of her mother dressed in black with a false look of sadness in her eyes was enough to make her wretch.

"No you're not," Allison countered. "You haven't been my mother for a very long time. No, let me finish…" she held up a hand to silence her mother's protests. "Just because you gave birth to me does not make you my mother. Anyone could get pregnant and give birth, but it takes a very special kind of woman to be a Mom. You're not that kind of woman."

Jorja's mouth dropped open. "How… you dare…"

"Yes, I dare…" she answered. "Look around, Jorja. You know as well as I do that Dad didn't want this, yet here you are, putting on this big show as though you actually loved the man!"

"I did love your father!" Jorja protested. "How dare you insinuate that I did not?"

"Oh please…" Allison shook her head. "When have you ever uttered the words I love you?" Allison leaned forward, locking eyes with the woman. "I don't believe I ever heard it."

"Oh but you did," Jorja insisted. "Many times. You just don't remember it."

"And isn't that just sad?" Allison crossed her arms over her chest. "It's a basic need! Every human being wants to know that they are capable of love, and that they are loved in return. Love may be complex, but it's the one thing that every single human being wants!"

"Don't…" Jorja shook her head. "Don't you dare start with your philosophical bullshit. We're here to honour your father, not to fight with each other."

"Don't tell me that that's not what you want," Allison was biting her lip. "All my life that's what you've wanted. If you care so much about our family, why did you cast me out when I needed you most? What had I done that was so unholy?"

"That abomination of a pregnancy."

"That's it? That's all I'd done?" she let out a shallow, quick laugh. "I already told you, that was not my fault, and I make no apologies for something that was unavoidable."

"And there was the matter of Noelle's death. You know that was your fault, yet to this day you take no responsibility, just like everything you've ever done with yourself."

"Oh come on!" she was close to shouting. "Her death was an accident. There is such a word. Say it with me, Jorja, AC-CI-DENT!" It was then she stopped, considering Jorja's words. "And you must be joking! I paid for everything. My apartment, my skating lessons, Janice's coaching fees, my school fees, everything. You have some nerve, telling me I don't take responsibility!" Allison gripped her wrist, willing herself to keep a cool head. "I was willing to marry a man over twenty years old than me, whom I wasn't in love with simply so I could protect you and Dad. I don't take responsibility, my ass! You know what?" she stopped for barely a beat. "I don't ever want to see you again, bitch. Go to hell."

And with that, Allison walked out of the church with her head held high, never to look back.

ooOoo

She walked back to her apartment, her fists clenched and her jaw set so squarely her teeth chattered with the pressure. Opening the door, she slammed it close behind her as she kicked off her shoes.

The sound of shoes banging against walls and doors slamming closed were no surprise to Severus. It was barely eight o'clock in the evening. Something had definitely gone wrong, he could feel it.

"I can't believe her! Nothing I've ever done has been good enough, and now here she is, accusing me of being an irresponsible whore! Blaming me for everything, what the hell is her fucking problem?"

"Such ghastly language is not becoming of you." Severus came into the front hallway, locking the door behind her.

"I don't fucking care right now, Severus!" she snapped, throwing her jacket against the hallway table. "She could die tomorrow and I wouldn't bat an eyelash. I wouldn't go to her funeral, that's for damn sure."

Sliding down to the floor, she braced her back against the wall, Severus following suit. "It's not my fault that this happened. Noelle dying was not my fault, my pregnancy was not my fault. She'd never believe me if I told her it was Rabastan Lestrange."

Severus wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

"Nothing I've ever done has been good enough. I've always felt like a freak, I never once felt right!"

"You are not a freak," he insisted, speaking slowly in the hope that the words would register. "You've been through more in the past two months than any human being deserves to be put through in their entire lifetime."

She drew in a breath, trying to calm herself.

"You were registered for Hogwarts at birth, Allison. It's not something you chose. You were born a witch, and that's the way it is. You can't get rid of it, and she can't acquire it. That's why Hogwarts was founded, to help people understand and control their magic."

"You sound like a school pamphlet," she rubbed her eye. "You know, I was wrong."

"About what?"

"I really did need you there tonight," she answered. "I needed you but I was too stubborn to admit it."

"It seems both of us have that problem," he answered.

"That's us, we're just stubborn."

Severus unwound himself and got up. He extended his hand and helped her off the floor.

"Could you boil some water?" she went upstairs and closed the bathroom door. She knelt down by the toilet, just waiting for the sick to come up.

And come up it did. It was as though every single thing she'd ever eaten was coming back up and taking her stomach with them. They'd only just had sex a few days ago, there was no way she was pregnant. Perhaps this was just a reaction to what had happened. She'd basically walked out of her father's funeral declaring she never wanted to see her mother again, and that was enough to wreck havoc on anyone's stomach.

What else could she do though? With Lestrange and Greyback still after her, it was worse than she thought. Severus wouldn't always be there to protect her, as much as he tried, and in reality she knew she couldn't use him as a crutch. She needed to brush up on her dueling skills. She'd never bothered with that horrid attempt at a school dueling club when she was in third year, especially with that egotistical maniac Gilderoy Lockheart at the helm. Since then she'd never seen a need for it, but then again she'd never had Death Eaters attempt to kill her so many times.

Taking a deep breath and forcing herself to the sink, she washed her mouth out and went down the stairs. Severus was waiting in the kitchen, just pouring water over a tea bag.

"Are you feeling alright? I heard you retching."

"Mm-hmm," she nodded. "I'm fine. I think I ate too much earlier."

"That's odd, because I didn't see you eat anything."

"I stopped in the bakery and picked up a bagel on my way home," she lied. The fact of the matter was that she hadn't eaten anything, she couldn't figure out why she'd needed to be sick.

He nodded, a smirk generating in the corner of his mouth. "You're a terrible liar."

"At certain times, yes," she could not argue with him on that point. "I don't know why I was feeling the need to bring up everything I've eaten in the last few days, sometimes it just happens."

She took the mug of tea from him and sat down at the kitchen table. The steam curled from the mug and dissipated in the air.

"Last I checked there were no answers in the steam from tea."

"Now you're getting into Trelawney's territory, stay out of there. I'd think you were huffing fumes."

"What a disgusting accusation," he answered, attempting to suppress a smirk. "The woman's a fraud, and everyone in the school knows it."

Allison sipped at her tea, blowing over the top to cool it down. "I heard she was the one who uttered the Prophecy."

She saw him freeze, his eyes closed as he hung his head. That damn Prophecy and its consequences would haunt him for the rest of his life. The fact that he'd led to Lily Potter to her death would haunt him forever. After the whole Mudblood fiasco, he'd never heard the words he needed so desperately. He needed her forgiveness, and he'd never heard it.

"Yes, yes that's true. We already spoke about it, when you first introduced quid pro quo into our relationship."

"Oh…" she turned her head in thought. "Oh, you mean that night by the lake, yeah, now I remember." She could almost see it in her mind's eye, he'd grabbed her hand that night, and asked her to stay, even if it was just to watch the water. "What did we talk about that night?"

"I think that was when we were all taking the Marriage Law word for word, and you wanted to know more about me. I think you said "If you can't tell me something about yourself, how can I trust you? It's impossible to do it blindly." And that was the night I told you about the Prophecy. As I remember you knew about Lily, but you didn't know what had led to her death."

"Okay, well now it makes sense," she got up and brought her mug to the sink. "Considering the type of people we were then and the people we are now, we've both changed."

"Of course we have," he answered, though he wasn't quite sure where the conversation was going. Usually Allison was calm and composed, but now he could barely understand what she was talking about. "Allison, what happened?"

"What do you mean 'what happened?' I'm fine. Don't worry about me."

He gave her a stern look.

"That look won't work on me, Professor," she chuckled, setting her mug in the sink. "Perhaps it did when I was twelve, but not now."

"Allison, come on," he exhaled sharply. "I didn't think I'd be seeing you for at least 2 hours, you arrive back an hour early, cursing a blue streak and in tears, then you run to the bathroom claiming you're about to be sick."

"I don't know."

"Yes you do," he pulled her to him in an effort to comfort her. "I'm a Professor, darling. I know when someone's lying. It's all in your body language. What did she say?"

Allison titled her head, looking him in the eye. She could no longer keep a straight face, her eyes welling with fresh tears.

"Please don't make me tell you…" her voice was so small it was difficult to hear her. "Please don't Severus… it…" she let out a sob. "It hurts too much!"

He nodded. "Another time then."

"No, I don't want to talk about it," Allison insisted. "It's not worth talking about. It happened, that's all you need to know."

"What happened?" he walked with her into the living room and sat her down on the couch. Immediately she dropped her head into her hands. "I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong."

"I don't want your help!" she shouted, unable to hold it in any longer. "Not right now! I just want to be alone. I can't do this anymore, I can't…"

He shook his head, whispered her name, and bent to carry her up the stairs. Reaching her room, he deposited her on the bed. He pulled the blanket over her and made his way to the door.

"You can't fight anymore is what you mean," he whispered. He closed the door and headed down the stairs to the living room once again. Reaching into his pocket, he threw a handful of Floo Powder into the fireplace and was almost instantaneously transported right into the office of Albus Dumbledore.