Summ.
Roxas never cared what his dad did with his life. Until he fell in love with the boyfriend's younger brother. They're engaged to be married, but will the young lovers stand up for their relationship? I mean it's not REALLY incest!
It is written in first person, chapters switching viewpoints from Axel to Roxas. Axel for odd numbered chapters, Roxas for even numbered chapters.
The first half of this chapter is the same as before... just chill about it!
'I need to talk to Axel about this… how are we going to explain ourselves to Dad and Reno? We need to put an end to this soon, the wedding is getting closer by the day…'
"Is that your excuse? I know you hate this woman but you're going to have to deal because she's our planner!" I heard my dad scolding in the other room. He must be on the phone with Reno.
Their appointment with the wedding planner lady was today, and the wedding… the wedding wasn't far off either. If Axel and I were planning on putting a stop to this, it should really be as soon as possible.
"Oh no you don't! You're going, Sharpie or not. Three o'clock. And if you don't show up I'll bring her to you and she'll know where you live."
My dad hung up the phone and sighed.
"What am I going to do with him? He's so difficult sometimes. And what was with the 'hey, beautiful' when I answered? Reno never says things like that."
'That sounds like something Axel would say…' I blushed. 'He didn't! Was he trying to sabotage their appointment? It didn't work but…'
"Roxas! We're leaving in an hour, go get dressed."
"Okay. Oh, wait… Dad, can I talk to you for a couple minutes?"
He blinked. "Of course, son. Go into my room and wait on the bed. I'll be right there."
I walked into my dad's room and cringed at the memory of my time with Reno. Nonetheless, I sat on the bed and my dad sat across from me.
"What's on your mind, son? Another question about sex?"
"More like I just want to talk."
My dad frowned for a moment before composing himself. "Alright. Go ahead. I'm listening."
"You… loved Mom, didn't you?" I asked quietly.
He seemed surprised at this. "Of course I did. I loved your mother very much, Roxas, and I still love her. She was a wonderful woman and she gave me a wonderful son. Why do you ask? I never expected you to doubt such a thing. I love you and your mom both very much."
I took a deep breath. "But you're going to marry Reno."
"Yes. I'm in love with him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him."
"But aren't you betraying Mom?"
"What?" his eyes grew wide. "I would never betray her. Roxas… your mother has been dead for a long time now. Thirteen years is a long time to grieve over someone. I still love her, and I miss her, but you have to allow more than one love into your life sometimes, Roxas. Your mother would have expected me to move on at some point."
"But how could you leave Mom behind like that?" tears were welling up in my eyes.
"Roxas," he touched the side of my face and lay me down on the bed, kissing my forehead softly. "You don't understand yet what it's like to lose someone you love and I really hope you never have to, because it hurts. It really does. I think about your mother every single day. I miss her dearly, you have to believe that. When I met Reno I was reluctant to become anything more than friends. I didn't want to hurt you, I didn't want to forget your mother… But I realize now that I don't need to forget her to have love in my life. There is room in your heart for more than one love. I can still love your mother and you and Reno and Axel too. I love you all."
"Okay. I understand."
"I'm glad we had this talk, son. I'm always happy to know what's on your mind."
"Oh, and Dad?"
"Yes?"
"I… I think I might be gay."
He smiled at me warmly. "That's fine. I never really was shooting for grandchildren from you anyway."
"Hey!"
He ruffled my hair playfully. "I love you, son."
"Love you too, dad."
Axel and I fervently kissed, and I felt cold air assault my scalding skin as my lover began to rid me of my clothes. A sickening feeling filled my stomach and I grabbed his wrist, effectively stopping him.
"W-wait…" nervously, I chewed on my lip as I choked out my next words. "I… I can't do this," I stated bluntly as I stood. The off-white wall was cool against my burning face as I tipped my head forward to rest on the somewhat chilly paint.
Axel's arms slipped around my waist as he came up behind me, making me almost jump but instead I merely twitched at his sudden touch, being rocked slowly from side to side in a comforting dance. "Why not, baby?"
"I don't…" I looked up at him, pain swelling in my heart not unlike any heartbreak I'd suffered before. "I don't deserve you… not anymore… not after what I did with your brother…"
The atmosphere grew dark as the mood dramatically shifted from happy to brooding. I looked into Axel's eyes, trying to find reassurance, a cure, something to end my misery. "Roxas…"
I felt tears sting the corners of my eyes as my face grew red from embarrassment. "It doesn't matter if we were broken up… it was wrong of me to have sex with Reno. I did it out of a moment of pure weakness, and I'm sorry, but… I don't think I can have sex with you again."
He wiped my eyes. "Roxy… It's okay. I didn't mind waiting for you the first time, and I'm okay with waiting now. Hey… look at me, baby… You'll be okay, Roxas. It's just too soon for you, that's all. You'll come around."
'You say that as if I'll be better by tomorrow, but the truth is I don't think I can ever stomach sleeping with you again…'
I heaved a sigh and Axel kissed my shoulder. "I love you," he whispered.
My arms held his tighter around my waist. "Yeah. I love you too."
Something struck me as odd, however. It was May… why was he wearing long sleeved shirts? It was probably 80 degrees or so outside, wasn't he hot? Something was up.
I pulled away from him and looked him over quizzically.
"What's wrong?"
"Axel…" I began, "take off your shirt."
He hesitated greatly, which only concerned me farther. My expression darkened in seriousness.
"Axel," I repeated, more firmly this time.
He protested weakly. "Roxy, I'm kind of cold…"
Hearing those words made me growl internally with anger. He was lying to me! "Now. Show me what you're hiding."
After a brief pause, he took off his shirt and my eyes grew wide with horror as the pale skin of his arms was revealed to me.
All up the inside of his arm, from his wrists to the inside of his elbow, were burns and scars.
The burns were all small dots that after a moment of thought I realized what the scent on his breath had been the day I stopped him from committing suicide at the pond.
Cigarettes.
He'd been smoking.
Fury and disgust welled up inside me as I inspected the scars. They were two clean, straight, and deliberate to be accidental.
He'd been cutting.
Seeing him in this condition made me want to vomit from pure dismay and revulsion at what he had done to himself. I whimpered his name, feeling hot tears of hatred and worry running down my cheeks.
"WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO YOURSELF?" I screamed, slapping him as hard as I could. He winced, moving away from me.
"Roxy…"
"YOU LIKE PAIN? I'LL GIVE YOU PAIN! THE PAIN YOU JUST MADE ME FEEL!"
I collapsed to my knees and fisted my hands in my hair, rocking myself to try and calm down, but the sobs only grew harder. I felt my heart breaking all over again. Seeing Axel hurt… knowing it was my fault… I couldn't bear the pain. I felt so much… pure distress…
And I blacked out.
I love you all so much, my readers and reviewers. I just want to let you know that there won't be any further updates for awhile. This update was a special treat before I went on hiatus again. Thank you for reading It's Not REALLY Incest!! Your support means so much to me.
-Kiyux.