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The Borgias S3E10

Pt. 35 Confirmation

Lucrezia and Gioffre were welcomed formally by the house of d'Este the next day at noon and received by Alfonso and his father, Ercole I, Duke of Ferrara, in the opulently appointed Government Room. The old Duke was cordial, though not overly warm and Lucrezia hid her bruised feelings well. It was common knowledge that he was not overly enthusiastic over his son's alliance, for he had tried, most valiantly, to remain as neutral as possible in the Italian wars that had besieged the country for so long. Under other circumstances Lucrezia would have taken his demeanor with a grain of salt, secure in her own confidence that she would be a success and an asset to the house of d'Este, but her feelings were still bruised and raw: over the last rejection by Cesare and the general conflict that raged within herself over the desire to be the best wife she could truly be to Alfonso and her truest disdain over having to marry him, at all.

Even with all of the trepidation that raged within her, Alfonso's kindness and genuine warmth helped to carry her through the afternoon, as well as the arm of her brother, whom she was so thankful to for being there for her to physically lean upon. After a luncheon banquet in their honor Alfonso presented his bride-to-be to the citizens gathered in the city center, who received her and Gioffre with cheers and shouts of well-wishes; the festival began then, that would last the duration of their visit. Alfonso squired his lady off then and treated her and Gioffre to a ride in his fine Hungarian coach, which boasted quite the smooth ride and had become all the rage with Italian nobles since his brother, Ippolito, had brought one back with him after his studies at the court of Matthias Corvinus. With two-hundred of Lucrezia's soldiers and two-hundred of Alfonso's in tow, they rode through the heart of the city, with Alfonso proudly pointing out its loveliest landmarks, and then onward and east through the Po Delta, past the many fine ducal estates and palaces of d'Este's wealthy relatives and supporters.

"This is most lovely of you, Alfonso, thank you for this beauteous tour...the river is a wonder..." Lucrezia said as she stared out at it in awe.

"We have had our hard times by it, let me assure you—flooding can be quite horrendous. We manage," he smiled at her.

"Where does one go to hunt, here?" asked Gioffre.

"Ah yes, I have heard of your prowess with the bow, Gioffre. We have a retreat and game preserve here, the Coparius—best boar hunting in all of Italy, despite what my friends in Naples would say; and a falconer's delight, as well. We should have time this week for you and I to spend at least a day there."

"Wonderful!" Gioffre's joy was unabashed.

"I understand the fishing is quite good there, as well—and truffles?" Lucrezia asked him.

"Oh, yes; my sister, Isabella, used to love truffle hunting with her dogs as a young girl. You shall meet her in the months ahead, for she waits to receive you at Mantua as soon as we are able to away after our wedding."

"Yes, that will most certainly be my pleasure, dear Alfonso."

By sundown they were being greeted by the revelers in the streets; the beginning fireworks began to go off as they traveled back across the drawbridge to Castello Estense, casting their colorful and magnificent reflective bursts against the dark water in the moat.

Alfonso could see that Lucrezia was a bit tired.

"Thank you, again, my Lady, for indulging me with your time," Alfonso said as he escorted Lucrezia and Gioffre to their apartment quarters. "Dinner will be late tonight, if that suits, and will be a simple and private affair between my father, your brother, you and myself—are you up to it?"

"Oh, yes. I shall have time for a bath and a nap?"

"Most definitely—dinner will be at nine."

"Yes, that suits. Until then, dear Alfonso."

Alfonso took her hand and kissed the back of it. "Until then, my Lady." He opened the door to her apartment and then closed it gently behind her.

"Well, Gioffre, will you take your rest or may I possibly interest you in joining me for a drink?"

"That drink sounds most refreshing, Alfonso," Gioffre beamed at him.

"Good man," said Alfonso as he gave Gioffre a warm pat upon his back and then led him away.

Alfonso devoted the next day to Lucrezia and Gioffre by giving them a beginning tour of the castle.

"I shall not try to show it all to you in one day, that would not be possible even if you were feeling at your best," Alfonso said quietly into her ear as he took her arm.

Lucrezia gave him a nod and a thankful smile.

"After lunch I have a wonderful surprise for you both," he said then, full of happiness over his little secret.

"Oh, Alfonso, you cannot leave it at that," Lucrezia said presently after she could see that he really planned to say no more.

"Welcome to the Garden of the Oranges..." Alfonso playfully ignored her.

"This is most breathtaking, dear Alfonso, but I cannot bear to be teased..."

"I will say only that your ears will be most delighted."

Lucrezia and Gioffre exchanged quizzical looks.

"Now, this garden was designed by Giralamo da Carpi..." Alfonso smiled as he resumed his presentation.

Later that afternoon, when lunch in the main dining hall was done, Alfonso escorted Lucrezia and Gioffre to the Hall of Games where seats were assembled before a small, intimate stage; other members of the court began to stream in and soon the Duke himself appeared, smiling his first genuine smile at Lucrezia.

"Ah, my Lady Lucrezia, you are in for the most delightful treat," the old Duke beamed at her as Lucrezia gave a happy curtsey. "Join me, please? Our seats await..." he held his arm out for her to take.

Seated between the old Duke on her left, Alfonso and then Gioffre on her right, Lucrezia noted the musicians on stage: one gentleman on the gamba; one young lady on the harp, one male lutist, one female singer with no instrument at all; one gentleman on the pipe and tabor and another on the recorder; and a finally, a female drummer. Lucrezia smiled her question first at the Duke, then asked him out loud in amusement, "I do not mean to be impolite, my Lord, but what on earth is this?"

"I have been honored to know many a fine musician in my lifetime, my Lady; we happen to have at court such a one who is a fine composer and the one responsible for what you are about to hear—it is a new form, all the rage here presently and soon to sweep all of Italy!" The Duke handed her a program. "This one is a collaboration with another of our esteemed musicians."

Lucrezia read the program quietly out loud. "Music by Bartolomeo Tromboncino, words..." she looked back up at the Duke. "Words?"

"Yes, my Lady—I present to you: the Frottola," he said as he looked, enrapt, upon the stage as the room quieted and the music began.

Lucrezia stole a glance back at the program and her jaw dropped open; she composed herself quickly and concentrated then on the lovely music, and then voices, that filled the room.

Several songs were performed and the concert was over just under an hour later and met with thunderous applause by the court.

"What say you, my Lady," the Duke asked her then as his eyes twinkled his delight at her.

"That...was the most beautiful thing I have yet heard in my life, my Lord. I am sorry that my words are so lame, but I am...most overwhelmed and moved," she gasped at him.

The Duke gave her an approving nod that further made Lucrezia's heart swell. "You must meet the musicians, one and all—come, my Lady," Ercole escorted her to the stage and introduced her to each wonderful musician. "And this is Bartolomeo Tromboncino..." he said proudly of the man who approached them next.

"My Lady, it is an honor," Tromboncino bowed at her.

"And this is Pietro Bembo—Cardinal—Pietro Bembo, now..."

"My Lady," Pietro smiled mischievously at her.

They had been whisked away and, for the rest of the afternoon and through dinner that evening, Lucrezia and Gioffre enjoyed the company of the Duke and Alfonso. It was never made apparent to her if Alfonso knew of Pietro's service to her in Nepi and she had not had—nor did she want—an audience with the Cardinal alone to find out. When she finally said her goodnight to everyone and retired to her room she was most ill at ease. What on God's earth was Pietro doing there? Would he still be at court after her nuptials? She paced her sitting room in a quiet fury. "Oh, God, what a perverse sense of humor you possess," she raged out loud as she pounded her fist. She managed to still her tongue and curse her misfortune inwardly.

I would have him; I would have him and enjoy every inch of him, even as I know deep in my heart he would only be a substitute for my beloved, for they do so look alike; I could pretend...

And what sort of awful wife would that make me? Why would you, God, throw such a temptation in my face before one who has shown me thus far only the most kind and generous regard? Cesare wants me not, any longer—Bembo would be a most fine morsel to sate me, indeed. How pitiful am I? Every man that I would find interest in—true interest—I measure against the one who wants me not...I am pitiful, indeed.

So, what must I do? Admit him to my betrothed, who wants not to be made a fool of? Or keep it to myself and succumb not to the one I know who desires me and has no sense of propriety at all, despite his words from before. Pietro would have me, as well, husband or no husband, whether that husband be dead or alive. He is a rogue and I must stay away from him. He means me no good at all if this house knows not of his prior service to me. I will have to admit it to Alfonso. I promised him my honesty. I must at least bring it up, for it could very well be a test upon me. And if I find that it is... she fumed. There was a knock at her door and she went angrily to answer it.

"Sister? What is wrong?" asked Gioffre, whose smile faded as soon as he saw the frown upon her face.

"Oh, Gioffre—my love, do come in...it does my heart well to see your sweet face now..." she pulled him into her salon.

"What is it, sister? What is your trouble? Do you not feel well? Is it the baby?"

"No...no, my love, I am fine. What a splendid day we had, yes?"

"Yes, indeed—are you sure you're alright?" He would not be so easily dissuaded from his concern.

"Yes, yes, brother, I promise that I am," she smiled sweetly at him.

"I came to tell you that Alfonso is taking me on the boar hunt tomorrow. I told him that I would tell you—do you mind?"

"No, Gioffre, not at all."

"We would have you come and stay at one of the lodges, but it is rather rustic there, he says, and he feels your comforts would be better met here."

"I would be most inclined to agree, Gioffre; do go and have a wonderful time, I shall be fine here. I can keep to my room, for I need some time alone. And maybe I shall venture out to enjoy the festival for a bit in the early evening, I would ask the Duke to accompany me."

"The Duke may have had his doubts about this marriage before, sis..."

"I'm sure he still does, brother."

"No—the way he looked at you as you watched the concert today—you were clearly, at that moment, a woman after his own heart, believe me, sister."

"There is such humanity in art; if only there was a way to use such magical music to soften the hearts of our embattled Lords, Gioffre; if only such music could rain down from Heaven, over the noble houses of the world; over the hearts of greedy, contentious men who deign to rule it; over the battlefields and the men who fight—and die—for them; unite them under the same effect that caused the Duke to look upon me with favor instead of contempt—wouldn't that be a wonderful thing? I would wish for that. It is a ridiculous wish, I know, but I shall wish it, nevertheless."

"It is a beautiful wish, sister, not ridiculous, at all. Something troubles you, my love—won't you confide in me? I will stay here tomorrow..." he began firmly.

At that moment Gioffre was no longer her little brother; he was a man offering his truest love and concern for her that she easily wanted to sink into.

"My Gioffre, what a fine man you are. You will go on the hunt tomorrow. Pregnancy, that's all it is my love; my emotions are always high at this time, that's all..."

"Always? This is only your second baby, sis..." he raised an eyebrow at her.

"You will hunt tomorrow, Gioffre Borgia, and that is that."

"Alright, Lucrezia, but we shall get you ready for bed then, and talk a bit before you abandon me for sweet slumber—and that is that," he smiled at her.

Gioffre did indeed go on the hunt with Alfonso to the Coparius the next day and Lucrezia did enjoy the festival the following evening on the arm of her future father-in-law. She did not see Pietro again for the rest of her time in Ferrara and began to wonder if he hadn't been but a figment of her imagination; she did mention his service to her in Nepi to Alfonso, who said that he had been aware of it but that Bembo had more dealings with his father than with himself and had no other questions for her about the Cardinal. She still was not convinced that it wasn't a test, but at least her conscience was clear as to the knowledge of their general acquaintance. As to Pietro's affections for her, she said nothing, for nothing truly damning had happened between them and even Bembo would have to attest to her most appropriate behavior toward him if he was to be pressed on the subject.

Lucrezia put him out of her mind and enjoyed the rest of her visit; Alfonso resumed his leisurely tour of the castle and all of their other times spent together were quite chaste and more than properly chaperoned. When the week came to its end she found that she was actually more than a little excited at the thought of returning one day and calling Ferrara home; she thought about how much Giovanni would benefit from growing up there, free to be with her and his sibling, as yet unborn. It gave her comfort to concentrate on that fact. As to Alfonso, she knew only that she wanted to give him her heart, but still, in the deepest recesses of it resided her Cesare, whom she knew that she would have to dispel completely for that to ever happen. After a week with the man all that she could do was hope that she would ever be worthy of his love, honest with herself over the fact that the ease she needed find was within her own self and abilities.

Alfonso could see that there was a weight pressing on her but he did not want to add to it. He didn't want to spoil a moment of their brief time together and could only hope that if there was anything she truly needed to confide in him about that she would have done so by then.

The night before she was to return to Rome they had their first true private moment together; he had taken her back to the Lion's Tower, where the night was mild and pleasant enough to sit out for a while under the stars; they took their seats beside each other on a stone bench.

"So, Lucrezia...our first real moment alone—and last, for a while."

"Yes, Alfonso. I want to thank you for a most wonderful week—I have greatly enjoyed being here with you and I do look forward to coming back as your wife."

"You really mean that," he smiled as he looked into her eyes. "I promise not to read more into that other than what it truly means, Lucrezia, but still, my heart is singing right now."

Lucrezia blushed and bowed her head and then her face grew a slight frown. "I...I know that I haven't been...I..."

"Lucrezia, please don't..." he said softly to her. "I know what a broken heart looks and feels like; a week together will not answer all of the questions we have yet to ask of each other, I know this, as do you; but it has been a blessing, has it not? To have even had this brief time together to determine if you could really go through with this. I was honestly expecting more heartbreak—for myself—by this week's end, Lucrezia, and I would have held you in no less higher esteem had you determined that this is a thing that you truly could not do. It will take time, I am honest with myself about that. And I ever appreciate yours. You have my trust; I realize that I must earn yours; your trust and your love. No...please do not cry..." he wiped a tear gently from the corner of her eye. "May I be so honored as to hold you now, my Lady? Would you take this moment to find a bit of solace in my friendly embrace?" He held his arm out to receive her.

Lucrezia found it easy to yield to him.

"I find your embrace most pleasing, dear Alfonso, thank you."

He nodded at her and they sat in silence for a long while. Finally the air turned a bit chilly.

"Would you like to retire now? The hour is growing late and you have a long ride ahead of you in the morning..."

"Yes, but first, we must answer at least one question of each other, Alfonso, for you must be sure that this is truly a thing that you can do, as well..."

"Oh? And what question is that?"

"This one..." she reached up and took his chin in her hand then placed a sweet kiss upon his lips. "Is your answer still yes, then?" she asked him somberly afterward.

He claimed her lips with his own then and dared to level his deep, hungry kiss upon her that Lucrezia met unabashedly with her own.

"Is your answer still yes?" he asked when their lips parted.

Lucrezia said nothing as she sought his lips out again to confirm that it was.

"Well, Gioffre, this is where we part, my love..." they were only a few miles from the city gates; Gioffre was headed back to Castel Sant'Angelo and Lucrezia was finally heading to convent, where her mother and Giovanni were awaiting her arrival.

"Be well, sister; I shall come back when I hear word from mother that you are within the week of your delivery—I must be home to welcome and hold my new niece or nephew in my arms, yes?"

"Yes, my love, I can't wait to see you again. Thank you, Gioffre, for coming with me, I don't know what I would have done without you."

Gioffre gave the back of her hand sweet kiss and then her cheek. "Come here..." he hugged her then. "Father has done well by you, Lucrezia; Alfonso is a fine man—he will make you happy, of that I have no doubt—he is a man in love, sis."

"And another man would surely know," she smiled at him. Thank you, my love. And I wish you success and happiness in Nepi."

"Thank you, sis. I love you."

"And I, you."

Gioffre exited the carriage and mounted a horse of his own and then was off, followed by five-hundred of their soldiers; the rest flanked Lucrezia and escorted her away.

When Lucrezia arrived at the convent she could not help but to notice that the whole place was abuzz with activity. She met the Father Confessor and he was positively beside himself.

"Welcome, my Lady, it is our pleasure to receive you!"

"Yes, thank you, Father—what is going on here? Certainly it is not my arrival that has everyone so a-twitter, shall we say?"

"Well, my Lady, you are quite the dignitary. Sister Elena, please see to our Lady's carriage and send her things to her rooms...Sister Maria, come with us...my Lady, please follow me?"

"Of course, thank you, Father."

When Lucrezia entered her quarters she knew then what all the fuss below had been about: waiting for her in her rooms was not only her mother and Giovanni, but her father, as well.

"Lucrezia, darling girl, We took the liberty—We hope that you will not be angry at Us?"

"Holy Father—no, I am not angry..." she rushed into his open arms.

"Vannozza, bring yourself and Giovanni here for this most loving reunion..."

Vannozza happily obliged. "My love, I am so glad that you are back home..."

After a time they tore away from each other and Lucrezia took her son into her arms and greeted him with her tears and kisses.

"Dare We ask it, Lucrezia? Was your trip away a success?" Rodrigo had a most genuine look of anxiety on his face at her.

"Holy Father, you and Cesare have outdone yourselves, in every possible sense, and I mean that with great love and kindness."

"Oh! Thank God in His heaven!" Rodrigo clapped his hands together in triumph; he kissed the cross around his neck and offered it up in great thanks. "Our heart soars, at this moment, with the most joyous happiness and relief!"

"And where is my brother? Gone back to knock down more castles?"

"No, not yet; he is at Castel Sant'Angelo still, happily waiting to welcome your brother home," Rodrigo smiled at her.

"You must tell us all about it, my love—we shall come back tomorrow, after you have had some rest?" Vannozza beamed at her.

"Yes, mother, that would be wonderful." Lucrezia was thoroughly annoyed at herself for being both angry and disappointed that Cesare had not come, as well; she asked nothing more of him. "And will you come again tomorrow, Holy Father, to hear me tell my tale of the magnificence that is the city of Ferrara?"

"We shall," he assured her.

"I do not know if this convent can take it, Holy Father—two days a visit from His Holiness, the Pope of Rome? They're already buzzing about downstairs more crazed than your honeybees."

"Well, they shall have to learn to calm themselves, hmm? For We plan to visit as often as circumstances permit and certainly for the birth of Our new grandchild."

"Yes, I suppose they shall."

"But We will leave you now, to settle you and your child in and take your rest; there was simply no way, daughter, that We could have ever let this evening pass without setting eyes upon you and take you in arm..." Rodrigo approached her again for a hug of goodbye.

"And I do love you so, Holy Father," she murmured against his chest as she lost herself in his embrace again.

"Goodnight, my love..." he whispered down at her.

"Goodnight, father," she whispered back up at him.

"We shall see you...shortly..." he said to Vannozza with a knowing grin before he took his leave.

"I shall not stay long, my love—only to help you unpack and get this one off to sleep for the night."

"Thank you, mother."

"So, how did you fare, my love?" Vannozza gave a rub to her own belly.

"My body spared me any indignities, I'm happy to say," Lucrezia reported.

"And how do you feel now?"

Sister Elena knocked on the door and then ushered two footmen in with one of Lucrezia's trunks; Vannozza began to unpack it.

"Only a little tired—I would give anything for one of La Bella's exquisite foot rubs."

"Hold up your skirt..."

Lucrezia obliged.

"Off of your feet—this instant," Vannozza ordered her when she saw her daughter's swollen ankles. "My foot rubs are nothing to sneeze at—on the bed, until I can tend to you."

By midnight, Vannozza had organized Lucrezia's room; fed Giovanni his last meal and had gotten him to sleep; seen to Lucrezia's bath; given her a foot rub; shared a light meal with her and tucked her weary daughter into bed as if she was a babe.

"Mother, really..." Lucrezia smiled sleepily up at her from under her cover.

"Enjoy this now, my love, for you are on your own after tonight."

"I do so appreciate you...thank you, dear mother."

"You are most welcomed. Get your rest now; we shall come in time to share supper with you tomorrow, yes?"

"Yes, I cannot wait."

"Sleep well..." Vannozza leaned down and gave her a kiss upon her forehead, but Lucrezia was already asleep. She left the room quietly.

And in her dreams...

He came to her, silently, bearing his sweetest kisses...

Strange...I've never had a dream so clear...so pleasurable...he is always just out of my reach and often has another face...am I dreaming awake? His kiss...so tender...so very sweet...so full of...love...yes, in my dreams he loves me still...why must I wake?

She stirred then, groggy and thick-headed; there were two windows in her room but it was a moonless night; she struggled to open her eyes and when she did they were met by an oppressive darkness; a sudden horror came over her as her eyes adjusted and she saw—and felt—a lump beside her in the bed move; a sharp intake of breath indicated that a scream was about to issue forth, but a hand clamped over her mouth and stifled it. She heard the strike of a match, saw it bring a bedside candle to life, and then she saw him clearly.

This is a dream...a strange and lovely dream...