Two is better than one (Damon)
We walked past the dance floor, down another flight of stairs and along the lake which stretched behind the Lockwood estate in the darkness. After a while we reached a bench lid with candle holders where we sat down, still none of us said a word. Then she broke the silence.
"So what are you and Stefan up to again? I'm pretty sure I won't like it …"
"Yeah … I think so, too. Ehm … we decided to … kill Katherine."
"Do what?"
"Kill Katherine … tonight … on the masquerade ball?"
"You two! Gosh you are really brothers! One more stupid than the other and together an unbeatable stupid team! Why the hell do you want to kill her today?" She screamed.
I had to laugh about her sudden fury. It made her even lovelier.
"Why do you laugh at me now? You are mean", she pouted and crossed her arms in front of her chest.
I laughed again.
"Because I probably have never seen you really angry before. Well, at least not when it … was … funny …"
The last words left my mouth only hesitantly because I remembered that I had already seen her so furious before … when she screamed at me … when she had screamed that she hates me. And from her face expression I could tell that she thought exactly the same.
"I'm sorry, I didn't want to …" I began but fell silent.
"It's alright. We made that already clear, remember?" She said, a slight smile returning to her face. "Hey and now go on and tell me about your stupid plan, no distractions anymore, I warn you, you know how furious I can get." She threatened laughingly.
"Well, perhaps it might be better if you don't know the plan. Can't you just accept the fact that we will kill her, you will be save and the problem will be sol…" I began but was interrupted by another scream.
"Damon!"
"Okay, okay, God, I hate this job,"
"Job?"
"Yep, being your bodyguard – not so bad actually – who has to tell you – very bad actually – that while we sit here, Stefan tries to get all information possible from our nasty little bitch - which is imprisoned in a room Stefan can leave but she can't, thanks to our little witch - about the moonstone and what she is doing in Mystic Falls; only to call me, when he got everything we need from her, to kill her together."
"He is with her?" She asked astonished.
I could see that her eyes became a hint sadder and at the same time I saw jealousy and distrust flare up in them.
"Trust him, Elena. He does all of this for you; to make sure that you and all your friends and family are save again. We have no other choice; we have to get rid of her otherwise we will all get insane not knowing what Katherine will be up to next."
"Yeah, I know, nevertheless … I can't help it. I mean … they have a history together, he loved her … and now she is back …"
"Do you really think he loved her?"
"Well you haven't seen him look at her … and I mean not in 1864, I mean now, after she returned."
"I don't think that you should be worried. Katherine never had … that much power over him, you know. He … he was afraid of her true nature and … did he ever tell you about our conversation before we tried to rescue Katherine from the wagon she was imprisoned in?"
"No … he only told me about how you two … died trying to rescue her …"
"Well … after I had found out that father had caught Katherine to burn her with the other vampires in the church and that Stefan had given him a hint about Katherine's true nature, I had run into the forest near the estate. It had always been the place where I had been able to make the best plans, the most desperate plans. I hadn't sat there for very long when I had heard steps approach. It had been Stefan who had been searching for me. When I had seen him, I had risen up from my seat on the felled tree branch and had drawn my knife. In this moment I had just wanted to kill him. I had never been so furious, so disappointed in my life. I had never been betrayed by my own brother. I had screamed at him that I would never understand why Katherine had trusted him … and why she loves him. In this moment I had seen something happening in my brother … as if he would have realized something … as if he had realized that he never loved Katherine, that he had been compelled to love her …"
"Wow … and you think … you really think it is true? That she only compelled his love?"
"I'm sorry, Elena, I can't answer you that question. Stefan is the only one who really knows it and until now he strictly claims that everything, his feelings, had been a lie."
"But Katherine … she loved him …"
"Yeah … she loved him" I laughed bitterly. "I don't think she really loved him, maybe he was the only person she cared about a bit; she doesn't know what love means. Katherine might have feelings for my brother but I can tell you that Katherine would never … risk her life for him for example. Katherine always thinks of herself. If it would come to a situation of life and death she would sell Stefan out without blinking to save her own life. And can you call that real love?"
"No … probably not …"
"You see? Stefan is not stupid. He knows how valuable you are and how lucky he can be that he has you as his girlfriend."
"… that he had me as his girlfriend …"
"That's why we are here … when Katherine is gone there will be no threat anymore."
"I … I'm not sure."
"What does that mean?"
"That means that I'm not sure if I want to risk it a second time. Okay, let's imagine that Katherine is gone. But … being the girlfriend of a vampire … always contains a risk for the people I love … I have to make sure that they are really safe before I can be with him again …"
"That is your decision … but … I can understand it."
She smiled at me and I smiled back at her, then for a while no one said a word, we just looked at the dark lake in which the moon and the lights of the party were reflected.
"Do you really …"
"Why did you … " We both began at the same time and laughed. "Ladies first."
"Oh a true gentleman", she laughed.
"Of course", I replied blinking.
"Do you really think this is a good plan … I mean … I m afraid that she will hurt the two of you … or even worse. I mean I know now what she is capable of …"
"Trust us, Elena. Even if she is much older than we are, she is alone and we are two … and she doesn't have such nice little weapons as we have…"
"Weapons? What weapons?"
"From our vampire hunter, Ric. And I can tell you even I was afraid when I saw them! He really knows how to protect himself and actually I m surprised that I'm still alive after all that had happened in the first place with Isobel … Well and I can say that he uses them a bit … too reckless. I found myself already in the sight of a huge crossbow … but hey I have already some experience when it comes to arrows, right?"
"Haha oh yeah definitely."
"I guess I will never forget your face when I stood in front of you, pierced by this arrow and later when you had gripped my shirt and shaken me desperately to wake me up." I had to laugh about that image. "The truth now … were you worried?"
"Worried about what?" She asked innocent, pretending to be clueless.
"About me?"
"Not a minute."
"C'mon! You can't tell me you weren't! I saw your face! And somehow your face is most of the time an open book for me."
"Okay, okay I was worried … but only a tiny little bit."
"Ha! At least a bit!" I laughed and she joined in.
Then there was another longer moment of silence. First I looked to the ground but then I couldn't hold myself back to look at her … how she sat there in her beautiful dress, a slight smile on her face, starring up to the moon …
"What?" I recoiled when I heard her voice.
Lost in my thoughts I hadn't recognized that she was looking at me.
"I was just thinking that … you are very beautiful tonight, more beautiful than you already are. The dress fits you perfectly well … as if it would have been made just for you …"
"Thank … you" she stammered and I saw her cheeks reddened.
I had to smile again. She was just too cute.
"It's my mum's dress."
"Your mum's?"
"Yeah … my … real mother's dress, she wore it to a Mystic Falls masquerade herself when she was younger."
"I bet you resemble her very much in this dress now, even if she wasn't your biological mother."
"Yeah … Jenna said that I really look a lot like her …" she said, not able to hide the sad tone that had appeared in her voice.
"You miss her, don't you?"
She looked me in the eyes for a moment; then she nodded.
"I miss her terrible much. Especially in a situation like this. Everything is just … a chaos and who do I have to talk to? Jenna doesn't know anything about … this world, Caroline has enough problems herself and Bonnie … yeah it is pretty obvious that she is definitely not the right person to talk to about everything that has to do with fangs."
"I know that I can't replace one of your girlfriends, I'm only a guy, but if you want to talk … I'm always there … and I try to give my best girlfriend-like advice", I offered her smiling.
"Thank you, Damon", she replied laughing. "I really appreciate that. And I'm really thankful that you were there for me yesterday … I don't know what I would have done without you."
"You're more than welcome."
For another moment we looked into the darkness, lost in our own thoughts when she suddenly broke the silence again.
"Hey you didn't tell me what you wanted to say when we both started to talk!"
"Oh right. I wanted to know why you changed your mind, why you decided to go to the masquerade ball in the end."
"Well … actually Jenna convinced me. I know, regarding your plan it would have been better if I had stayed at home. But actually I am happy that I did come to tell you how unbelievable insane you two are –even if I can't convince you to stop this idiotic plan. Therefore I know you two Salvatore's too well … both totally stubborn! I would probably end up bounded in a storeroom – the main thing is that I am safe no matter if YOU risk your life."
"Yup, summed it up pretty well" I replied and smiled mischievous.
She shook her head then she went on.
"Yeah and Jenna seemed to have her philosophical day because she told me that I am only young once and that it would be a good distraction from the break up with Stefan and then she came with the dress … and I thought: Yeah, damn, she is right, I need distraction! And so I decided to come here to have fun at least one evening … but with Katherine running around here I can forget about those plans and play hide and seek instead."
"Well I think that Katherine is pretty busy with teasing my little brother so let's have fun!" I replied and offered her my hand.
She only looked at me astonished.
"May I have the pleasure of this dance?"
"Of course", she replied smiling and took my hand.
May I - Trading Yesterday
I can see when the lights start to fade, All that's made me
the day is done and your smile has gone away.
All I want is to keep you safe from the cold...
to give you all that your heart needs the most.
Is all worth trading
just to have one moment with you.
So I will let go
knowing that you're here with me.
May I hold you
as you fall to sleep.
When the world is closing in
and you can't breathin',
may I love you.
May I be your shield.
when no one can be found
may I lay you down.
When we walked back, up the stairs to the terrace and to the dance floor, I heard that the band just started a slow song. I wasn't sure if I should risk it. I guess I already pushed my luck quite far with the kiss and the last thing I wanted was to ruin the special atmosphere which had build up between us while we had talked.
"We can wait until they play a faster song", I offered.
For a moment I could feel her hesitation but it only lasted an instant.
"No, this song is awesome", she said, looked up to me and smiled.
I looked back at her, not able to hide my surprise, making her laugh. I smiled and pulled her onto the dance floor. I lay one hand on her back and hold her hand with the other while she placed her hand on my shoulder. Then we began to move slowly to the rhythm of the music.
"Why are you smiling?" She asked after a while.
"I just listened to the lyrics. They … they let me remember the day I first met you …"
"Yeah when you scared me to death", she laughed. "I turned around and suddenly you were standing in front of me, only inches away. I still have your face expression in mind and the way you bend your head to look at me." She smiled. "Yeah exactly like this!" She laughed when I bend my head to one side, just as I did when she had looked at me that day.
"And I remember how I kissed your hand before you left …"
"Always the gentleman, like I said."
A crooked smile appeared on my face.
"Or what about the day I saved you after your car accident and we went to Georgia – you really have a tendency for car accidents …"
"… and to let myself save from you", she went on laughing.
"I think so, too" I joined in her laughter.
Then there was a moment when we only looked into each other's eyes, turning around to the music.
"What are you thinking now?" I interrupted the silence.
"That this reminds me of something …"
"Of what?" I asked astonished.
"Of the last time we danced – the Miss Mystic Falls Dance, dummy."
"Oh sure, of course."
"Don't tell me you forgot it!"
"Elena! How … " I hesitated. "How can I ever forget this dance? I never will. Because it was …"
" … indescribable." She finished my sentence.
"Yeah, exactly."
She smiled and then; suddenly; she laid her head on my chest. I stopped breathing, totally astonished by this sudden move. And what I felt while holding her in my arms, while dancing with her, turning around on the dance floor can't be put in words. I felt her hand on my shoulder, her other hand in my hand. It was as if electricity was flowing from the places where she touched me through my entire body. I felt totally hyped up. I wonder if she felt that I was trembling because I was absolutely incapable to hold back the shivers that were running through my entire body. Just like when I had kissed her my whole body was going up into flames; ignited by her touch. Her hair gently caressed my cheek and I could smell a faint hint of vanilla and jasmine. An unbelievable warmth was radiating from her body to mine, melting every piece inside of me, every single part that had frozen to ice over the centuries, breaking down the stone walls I had build up so carefully; so thick, so huge; around my heart.
"Cause when I close my eyes and drift away I think of you and everything's okay I'm finally now believing; so maybe it's true that I can't live without you …"
I bend my head slightly and leaned it against hers. I wanted this moment to last forever.
Then she suddenly interrupted the silence; with words that let me believe she had read my thoughts.
"Two is better than one …" she said. "I guess we figured that finally out, too, right? Without you I … I would probably still sit there … in the darkness, in the rain, alone …"
"Yeah" I said in a rough voice, barely a whisper. "And without you; without your trust … I … I would probably still be … a … a heartless monster, lost …" I whispered, meaning every word. "You are my light … in my endless darkness …"
She lifted her head, her brown eyes meeting mine. We were both surprised by the sudden change in atmosphere. It was as if it would be like the last time we danced. There was this unbelievable strong electricity radiating between the two of us. Her face was only inches away from mine; and these eyes; these deep brown eyes; starring into mine, into my soul, into my heart; unleashing feelings I have never felt before; in my entire life. We were both breathing heavily and I could hear the beat of her heart speeding up. I could feel it against mine; and it felt as if it would respond even if that was impossible. Without really knowing what I did, I lowered my head. She looked at me, astonished and at the same time … convinced. Then she closed her eyes. My entire body was trembling, from excitement; from fear; from … love; when I closed my eyes, too …
A sudden vibration let me recoil.
Damn it! I should let him die, I should let him get killed by this arrogant little bitch … and just go on, kiss her … his girlfriend … his love … his home …
I took a deep breath; then I opened my eyes to see that Elena looked at me … interrogative, ashamed … and disappointed?
I pulled my mobile phone out of the pocket of my trousers. It was indeed my brother. I wanted to stay. Everything inside of me screamed to stay, to stay with her … except my heart. My heart was torn.
"Stay here, exactly here, don't move!" I ordered while turning around.
"Damon! Wait! Where are you …?" But she didn't have to finish the sentence, she understood.
"Stay – here, no matter what happens."
Then I ran as fast as I could through the crowd of people and up the stairs into the estate, leaving Elena behind, alone. The last thing I heard was only a whisper … "Be careful, Damon."