Author's note: Welcome back! I wrote this little part about Ana returning to work after having Teddy, but decided that I was happy with my original ending.

But now I am going to share it and use it to shamelessly plug my new sequel to this story, 'County Line Road.' It picks up right where 'Crossroads' ends, so if you haven't already done so… check it out! It's full of good fluff, but is just now starting to reveal it's darker underbelly.

Enjoy and, as always, thanks for reading!

xoxoxo

Outtake #1 (Teddy is three months old)

I wake up my alarm - ugh, 6:00 - to what feels like my first 'real Monday morning' in forever. I get up and peek cautiously at Teddy, trying to stay out of his line of sight. He's awake, but quiet. Good. I scurry into the bathroom and take a shower. Ohh... I could linger in here. NO. This is a big day and it's time to get moving!

I get out and dry off, comb out my hair, slip on a robe and panties. Thankfully, I am not leaking too much anymore... as long as I stay in our routine.

I go over to Teddy, who sees me and starts waving his arms and kicking. Oh sweet boy... I scoop him up, change his diaper, dress him in a cute dump truck one-piece, and take him to the rocker to feed him. He's efficient, and we're finished inside of ten minutes. Oh, my good boy!

I know he won't want to go back in his bassinet, so I grab a quilted blanket and lay it out on the closet floor. I put him on his back, give him a rattly toy... he's happy and should be good for a few minutes anyway. I'm just finishing getting dressed - my regular dress pants fit - yay! I've been holding on to some maternity pants, just in case. I put on black pants, an ivory blouse, a cropped black blazer... yes, very professional. And the blazer will protect me from... anything embarrassing. I hear Christian coming down just as I'm finishing. He walks in, "Well good morning, Mrs. Grey. I just came down to make sure you were up."

"I have showered, fed Teddy, and gotten dressed in," I check the time. "Forty minutes." I say proudly. Yes!

He grins, gives me a quick kiss, then heads off to shower. Teddy seems content, so I follow Christian into the bathroom and dry my hair and put on some makeup, earrings... Done! And it's only 7:15.

I head back out, gather up Teddy, and take him upstairs. Marissa and Ellie are dressed and ready... eating breakfast at the counter with My Little Pony playing on the little kitchen TV. I kiss them each on the head, but they are zoned out. I put Teddy in his bouncy seat and grab coffee and one of the muffins I made last night. I am on top of it... Wonder how long it will last?

Christian has the girls' lunches ready, so I just have to pack up Teddy. His bag is mostly ready, but I add four bottles of pumped milk in their cooler bag. I am proud of my little stash. I have been feeding and pumping like a mad woman these past few weeks. My pumping gear is packed and ready to go, sitting next to my work bag. That's it!

Christian comes up and we are ready to go. 7:30 on the dot. We head out for our first morning on-the-go as a family of five. Marissa has graduated to having the third row to herself. Ellie and Teddy share the second row - she in a backless booster now and Teddy is in his infant car seat.

The school and daycare are on the same property and they share a parking lot. The girls are at the daycare for about 30 minutes before school, and for about two hours after school. And today is Teddy's first day and… I am not going to cry! Ellie distracts me by giving Teddy 'the tour...' "And this is the office... the bathrooms... where me and Marissa go... and this is YOUR room." We all go in and of course it's vaguely familiar... smiling faces, a few other babies, bright colors. Soon I am handing him off to the very capable Sally and Bonnie. We kiss everyone goodbye and head out... empty-handed. Just me and Christian. Wait, hold on... Tears start to slide down my cheeks. He gives me a squeeze on the way to the car. "The first day is the hardest. It'll be routine soon."

We get in the car and I can't help it... I am crying for real now. And I cry all the way to the library. Then I force myself to stop, dry my eyes. So much for looking professional... Christian squeezes my hand, gives me a soft kiss. "Try and have a good day, baby." Then, "And if you hate it, you know..."

Yes, I know... I don't have to work. And right now I just want to go snatch Teddy back and go home. I nod. "I know. I want to try." And I get out, grab my stuff, give him a wave and a brave face, and turn to head into work.

I go set my stuff down, adding a framed photo of Teddy to my collection. Oh that sweet face... Don't look! Not a lot of people are around yet... it's only 8:20. I head to Gail's office to check in. I haven't seen her in... six weeks? Since she came bearing gifts for Teddy. But we've been emailing regularly, and she's generously offered up her office to me for pumping. I will need to pump two or three times a day for about 20 minutes each.

I pause in the doorway and she looks up, her face lighting up in a welcoming smile. "Ana!" And she comes to give me a big hug. "Come, sit down. I already got us coffee... let's catch up. How are you?"

Oh no. Nope, I cannot go there. Tears prick my eyes and I sigh, "Well... I thought being pregnant was hard... but this..." She gives me a sympathetic smile and a reassuring squeeze.

We sit and talk and talk... catching up on work - my schedule and what's on the docket - and life. Oh, maybe it's good to be back! She sends me off with a list of busy work and yes, this is good.

The office is full and bustling when I return to my desk. Several people come up to greet me, offering their congratulations and welcoming me back. They admire Teddy's photo, say I look great. Hannah, of course, is genuine and we hug each other warmly. She tells me to let her know if I need anything... I just shake my head, give her a stiff smile. She understands. Don't give me sympathy, just keep me busy and distracted.

Finally, I am left to my work. I dig in and let the busy work take over. And before I know it, it's 11:30. Time for lunch... and to make Teddy's lunch for another day. I grab my lunch bag and pumping gear and head to Gail's office. She's on the phone, but gestures me in. I shut the door behind me and settle in. I cover up - it's a little awkward - but I finally get it all adjusted and going. I have a pumping bra, so I can be hands-free to work or eat. I dig into my chicken salad sandwich... Mmm... I am starving. I am always starving these days.

We settle into a new routine... at work, in the evenings, on the weekends. And it's good. I miss Teddy during the day, but I know Sally and Bonnie dote on him, just as they did with his older sisters.

One bright, May afternoon as I'm pumping in Gail's office, I note the date... May 14th. What is it about that date? "Oh!" I say out loud and Gail looks up. "One year ago today, I interviewed for this job." I say, "If someone told me this would be happening," I gesture down at myself, "and seem totally normal just one year later" I shrug. "I had just found out... six days before, and I was so nervous... and nauseous..."

"And you survived... you thrived, Ana. Which is why - with your first anniversary coming up, I am recommending you for a permanent position - as a full-fledged children's librarian."

I grin. Yes!