Shuichi's POV

The food is nice. It is always nice. Yuki is one of those people who is good at everything he does.

So I direct all my attention to the meal. I don't even look at him. Ha!

I know that he is looking at me. I feel his goldenbrown orbs on me; they burn more than any fire. I try to eat, pretend that the meal is all that matters. I stab at it angrily. Each bite is harder and harder to swallow. Finally I give up and drop the fork.

"What is the matter now," he asks.

"Stop staring at me!"

"You are asking me to do impossible."

"Why!" As soon as I spit out the question, I know that I have made a mistake by asking this, my big mouth be damned.

Yuki looks amused. The prick!

"Because I like what I see too much,"

I don't want to answer that. I cross my arms over my chest and look sidewards at the drawing on the wall.

Yuki is smoking.

He has something to do at least. I have just some drawing to stare at.

I hate this. I have had enough!

I jump to my feet, snatch that damned cigarette from his mouth and stub it on my plate.

Then I blow up.

"Stop! Stop this right now! I am sick of these games and…I am sick and tired of people who want something from me." I should just go somewhere and live alone. This movie career was bad idea. I am tired, I want to be alone.

"Tell me, what you want Yuki, I will give it to you and you will leave me alone, okay? Is it sex? You usually wanted sex when you were nice to me. Are you trying to woo me? Fine. If you needed to get over me or just because…I don't know why…I can do it. It is not such big deal; it is not like we haven't done it before. Just…just say what you want…okay…"

Yuki's POV

No! Fuck! No!

Where is he getting those ideas?

Have I done everything wrong again?

Shuichi stops talking and falls on his knees in front of me. Tired. Sad. What can I do? I don't know what to do when other people are sad, I usually don't care enough to do anything.

Oh, fuck it… I don't know what… everything… Shu is all what matters. I sit down on the floor, wrap my hands around him and pull him as close as I can without actually breaking all the bones in his small body.

"Shut up, Shuichi. Don't talk like that."

I pull him closer, if it's even possible, and it's somehow still not close enough. I brush my cheek against the silky skin of his cheek and press my lips to his neck. His skin is so warm and he smells so much like him.

"I don't want to sleep with you…well I don't mean that I don't want you… I do… I always do, but not like that," oh, God, here I am babbling and stammering like complete idiot.

"I am sorry, Shuichi. I am sorry about a lot of things. I don't want you just in my bed. I want you back. In my life, in my flat. Everywhere."

"Yuki…I can't."

"I am not going to leave you. I need you. I will not leave you alone until you will return to me or until I will be sure that you don't love me anymore. No, I won't leave you even if you will stop loving me, I'll just make you to fall in love with me again."

He tries to push me away, his little hands; small fists against my chest are useless.

"Let me go, Yuki," he begs.

"Never,"

"I hate you…"

"I know,"

"You will never let me go?"

"Never,"

I let him sit back. I take his face in my hands and look in the large amethyst eyes.

"I love you, Shuichi."

His eyes fill with tears and soon they run freely down his cheeks.

"Damn it! Don't cry, Shu, don't! I can't see you like that."

I kiss both of his cheeks, I kiss away his tears. I wish I could takeaway the pain behind those tears as easily.

"Come now," I help him stand up. Then I put my hand oh his bum and lift him up. Shuichi wraps his hands around my neck and his long, slim legs around my waist the way he always do.

I carry him upstairs and carry to his room. I lay him down on the bed as gently and carefully as I can. I have to make him to let go of my neck.

I take off his shoes and pull of the pants. Then I help him with the hoodie he's been wearing. He still looks way too young and way too beautiful. I pull the sheet over his petite form.

Then I lean down and kiss him on his cheek.

I stand up and turn around to go.

"Yuki," I suddenly hear his voice. "Please, stay with me Yuki."

TBC