---

Erik

---

She slept.

My angel. My goddess. My heart. My life. My soul...

She slept and I tried to but I lay beside her with another painful erection wanting to shake her awake just so I could fuck her brains out.

Is three times not enough for you? You already made her pass out. Who knows how many times you could have gone before passing out yourself and could she have even taken it? She was an innocent virgin you insensitive prick!

I sighed and gently traced the slope of her cheek. Not that I wasn't a virgin myself but it seemed a lot easier to endure from my side of the lovemaking. Endure, I almost laughed, more like savor and relish every glorious second.

Everything that we'd done felt like a dream to me. How was I to ever do something menial with her, like cook or eat or give her a lesson when we could be doing that? It had felt so damn good to be coupled with her, like I had finally come home after an eternity of a cold empty meaningless life. I was entirely accepted, loved, passionately loved by her...

How did other people go on with their days? I would be content to never do anything but make love to my soon to be wife.

Wife. I sighed again and removed my hand from her lips. I had so many things I needed to take care of and now all I wanted was to stay in bed with her forever exploring every nuance of this activity called sex. I knew she would never deny me and it would be up to me to take charge of things; be responsible and make sure we stopped to eat and go outside every so often...

And thinking of that I knew she had rehearsal tomorrow and if I wanted her to keep her new status as the toast of Paris I knew she had to attend. The strict note I'd left the managers dictated that by no means were they to allow Christine to dance anymore, she was a diva, not a dancer. I would allow men to praise her vocal skill, she was a goddess after all, but I knew I had not enough control to allow them to gawk at her while she twirled her luscious body around the stage. She was going to be my wife and...

Wife. The word was akin to responsibility. I scrubbed my hands over my face. I needed to get some work done.

I slipped out of bed to go boil some water. I would make some tea for now and make my sleep tonic as soon as I finished my work. There was no other way I would get any sleep next to Christine with this raging hard on. I started at my desk writing up a list. I had to get started on the house I would build for Christine, I had to get papers for myself, I had to speak with Meg tomorrow and perhaps visit her mother to make sure she would not reveal me. I had to figure out who Count Inninbalm was and post letters to Mr. Lauzier and Mr. Renaux. I needed to visit the site for the next house my company was building and have a meeting with Bernard about it and finish the first sketches. I thought I should maybe make an appointment for Christine at my tailor. She would need a wedding dress and I had a feeling they took awhile to make. Perhaps there were more feminine things I was unaware of that she would need to accomplish before our wedding, flowers and things of that ilk. I would have to speak with her and perhaps Nadir as well to figure out all of the arrangements.

I rose from my desk with a sheet full of tasks. I detoured to look in on Christine and found her curled in a ball on my pillow. I couldn't help but be distracted by such a sweet sight but when my cock started to swell, I left quickly. I rubbed the straining offender with a mild chuckle. Get a taste of something you like, I jokingly asked it but my thoughts turned serious once more. How I was so calmly planning to traipse about above ground like I wasn't a freak?

I ran one hand slowly over my face. Christine was slowly making me into a new man. A man with confidence and self esteem. A man who found himself worthy of an angel's love so why not a man who walked above ground and let people look at his accursed face? Did other men feel so grateful when a woman bestowed not only her love but her body upon them? Did other men willingly twist their whole lives around for the love of their woman? Did other men think of waking their lover from a deep needed sleep only to commit sexual acts upon them over and over again?

One thing was for certain. I was very glad I'd begun taking neem oil last week. The old gypsy lady had looked at me quizzically when I asked if she had any neem leaves or seeds with the other herbs I purchased but when she handed over the oil she winked at me slyly. She knew what it was used for. I only knew about this particular herb because of my time in India. A wealthy Indian prince who paid for my entertainment skill, told me of this 'magic' seed that would diminish a man's seed. At the time I thought it juvenile and crude to want such a thing. The man obviously had no restraint and did not want any back lash for his careless actions. Now though, I was grateful for that knowledge and thought maybe I understood why a man would choose to take it. I did not want to get Christine pregnant at this time. I did not want to chance creating a child with my face. I did not want some ugly creature stealing away my time with Christine. I also really did not want to get her pregnant before we were married. Perhaps after a few years of bliss I might reconsider. There was always the possibility that the child would look like her...

And now the offender jerked excitedly at the thought of the naked beauty who was sleeping soundly in my bed. I gritted my teeth and thought of dogs and cats as I opened my laboratory door. There was one more thing I needed to get done before I went to sleep.

I had never made plastic or rubber before but I'd read about them extensively thinking that they would make a more flexible mask then my usual plaster. Just because I was preparing to walk in the world like a normal man didn't mean I was going to allow myself to be gawked at. If that meant I was still hiding from the world then piss on them all. I didn't need them all to stare and point at my ugliness.

I spent the next couple hours toiling with ingredients and my melting pots, finding the right ratios and the proper color until I'd fashioned something I thought might be useful. I was tired by the time I closed up my lab and thought I might do without my sleep tonic but then I might dream and I might not be able to sleep once I laid out next to my goddess. I fixed my drink and a tray with some bread and butter and apples if she woke and was hungry. I also wrote her a note in case she worried about my 'sleep like the dead'. I moved a small table to her side of the bed and set the tray there with a fresh candle burning brightly in a lamp.

I watched her sleep for a few minutes trailing my fingers over her bound hair and soft features and then hastily drank the concoction. I'd put in half the laudanum I usually took figuring that it would probably do since I hadn't taken any in days. As I settled my body around hers she sighed in her sleep and snuggled her naked body closer into my arms. I smiled, feeling like a man, before I slipped into oblivion.

---

Christine

---

I woke and stretched lazily only to feel the arms around me and stop mid motion. Everything came back with a warm flush and I smiled into my pillow. I was a little sore between my legs but felt entirely complete.

I shifted closer to Erik, wanting him to hold me tight but his body didn't compliment my motions. I turned sleepily to look at him. His face was slack and completely exposed with his smooth cheek pressed to the pillow. I reached up to cover his sunken cheek lovingly. He still didn't move and panic rose in my chest.

I quickly pressed my ear to his chest and the steady thump mocked my racing heart with it's casual beat. I sat up and covered my face as I tried not to cry. I was so scared to be left alone; so scared that Erik would be taken from me just as quickly as Papa. I started to pray but then remembered my blissful evening of sin with my fiancé. Would the Lord even listen to me now?

I pressed my lips together and slid from the bed. The small table set up for me by my perfect man made tears sting my eyes. I saw his handwriting and reached eagerly for the note.

My love,

I have dutifully taken my sleep aid to get some recuperative rest. I am quite sure that I can not be woken until it wears off but you are welcome to try. My heart beats only for you.

Eat something.

It was not signed but then he didn't really need to. I looked over my shoulder at his sleeping form. I wanted to wake him so he could hold me but how selfish would that be when he obviously needed sleep to control his illness. I sighed and rose to go to the washroom. I fetched the black wrapper and tied it on and took the light he'd left me out into my bedroom and wash room. I wondered if I was pregnant now and how long it would take to find out for certain. I honestly hoped that I wasn't, as much as I hoped for children in our future.

As I returned to Erik's room through the living area I slowed as I passed the wall of books. I doubted I would sleep anymore and I did notice he had some medical texts. I found a few books to bring with me and brought them to bed.

I stared at my sleeping lover wondering if every woman felt this way when a man made passionate love to them. I was still slightly frightened by the powerful surge of emotion he wrought through me and yet I waited desperately to feel it again. I always felt so alive when he touched me, so radiant and beautiful that I felt like a flower blooming in his presence as if he were my sun. Did every couple make love with such insatiable intensity, with such fiery swiftness? Is that how my parents showed their love?

I shut away those thoughts and propped the pillows on the ornate headboard. I curled with one of the books beside my lover in our bed, flipping through the first one quickly, looking for mention of women's cycles and babies. I found what I was looking for and started reading as I munched one of the apples he thoughtfully left for me.

---

Erik

---

I woke from darkness to the dim shadows of my bedroom. I was cold and I immediately turned over to find Christine beside me, smiling serenely as I pulled her quickly into my embrace.

"Good morning," she whispered, her lips warm and soft on my cold ones and I wanted to kiss her deeply but I could taste the valerian at the back of my throat and it really is disgusting. Like burnt dirt.

"Did you sleep well, my angel?" I asked, concerned that I had been oblivious to her state for how long now? I carefully studied her face and twirled some of her loose curls around my fingers.

"Mmm hmm," she wiggled closer and her naked body brushed mine, so warm and soft and mine to explore. I kissed her again, unable to resist, pressing my mouth hard over hers. My hands swam down her back, her skin like silk beneath my fingers. I cupped her round bottom and shifted my mouth to her ear so I wouldn't give in and taste her mouth. The scent of her hair was like a drug though and I traced the delicate shell of her ear with my tongue. I was longing for the secrets of her body already and I stopped myself.

You could show some restraint you poor excuse for a man. She is most likely tender from last nights explorations.

"What time is it?" I asked as I rolled us apart and sat up to keep my growing erection from her notice.

Dogs and cats.

Cats and dogs.

"I'm not sure, it was quarter to four when I woke," the bedclothes rustled, "But that was awhile ago."

"Your rehearsal starts at nine and I do not wish for the new diva to be late," I walked to my bookcase and checked the time on my watch, six forty-seven. I slept for almost nine straight hours. That was good and with half the laudanum, now I just hoped it was enough to keep the seizures from happening.

"Have you eaten pet?" I strode to my clothes to get dressed. It would be far easier to control myself if we had barriers between us.

"I had an apple," I glanced at her because I am a weak weak man. She was wrapping the black peacock wrapper around her naked form and then began pulling the ribbons from her hair. Honeyed curls dropped around her shoulders, enveloping her delicate body in cascading darkened sunlight. She bent to pick up a book from a small stack at her bedside and I realized I was standing and staring at her like a naked idiot. I turned to open my wardrobe.

"I warmed my voice properly," she said it like I might be wondering if she did and it made me feel sort of strange to be her instructor and lover. I still wasn't sure how I was going to give her lessons and not want to pull her down into my lap. "Do you not warm yours before speaking?" she was moving towards me and my eyes were once more drawn to her; the sway of her hips, her ease and grace and the sparkle in her golden eyes.

"I am not a soprano, nor a singer on the verge of her career," I raised a playful brow at her.

"But your voice is marvelous, much richer than mine," she reached my side and her arms encircled my neck, with the nameless book in her hand. "You have the voice of an angel."

"I am no angel..." I grumbled as I took her firmly in my arms and buried my face in her neck, biting her gently. Her breath caught and I knew if I wanted to I could have her right now, before I had to return her upstairs. I pressed myself to her silk clad body and was so very tempted.

The book thumped to the floor behind me and her hands slid greedily down my chest over my hips to cup my bare backside. I chuckled against her hair. I'd noticed her penchant for my rear end.

"Find something you like?" I breathed in her ear and she giggled and gave me a light squeeze. I smiled against her skin, my hands wandering to the edges of her wrapper until she burst out.

"Oh Nadir!"

"This is an odd time to be shouting his name," I couldn't keep the dry irritation from my voice as the thrill of the moment was lost.

She blushed rosily and pulled away, "I just realized we missed dinner with him last night. Don't you go every Sunday? Today is Monday, we missed him..."

I turned back to the wardrobe, "He knew we would be occupied."

"Occupied?" she sounded amused. She leaned closer to peer in the wardrobe, "Is that what you call it..." she murmured cheekily.

"Mmph..." I had no intelligent response for that as I distracted myself with choosing my clothing. One of her delicate hands reached into the wardrobe to stoke one of my fancier vests.

"You love clothing," it was more statement and less question, like she was certain of my ways. "You always dress like a prince and bought me the clothes to dress like your princess."

Should I tell her that when you've had nothing but rags for most of your childhood and then are forced to wear nothing but a loincloth for a few years it tends to make you over dress? Or should I say that I never thought anything so soft and warm and silky as her body would ever be touching my scarred frame so I wrapped it in all the luxurious fabrics I could? Should I mention that I bought the clothes for her because I noticed her lack of attire and not so I could dress her as my princess, though now that I think of it I was rather overly extravagant in my purchases for her...

I let my hand stray from the clothing to trail over her hand and arm. "It comforted me to live in a dream, my clothing helps the illusion."

"Illusion? Of what?"

"That I am normal." She paused and then turned and ducked and slipped into my arms, her cheek to my naked chest.

"Erik..." her voice broke and my anger stirred. Even when I tried to give the most innocuous answer I still managed to upset her. I ground my teeth together briefly and whispered in her ear.

"Do not cry or I will bite you."

That turned her mood around. She swatted my bum with one hand and told me I was naughty, crossing her arms in defiance of her tears. She watched me pick out my pants, shirt and vest commenting on all the black and I asked her if she wanted to get dressed today or was planning to remain naked for me. She blushed darkly and made to leave. I was thrilled that she still had such innocence left inside her to blush after what we had done last night and I couldn't resist her any longer. I grabbed her from behind, yanking her into my embrace, still completely naked myself.

"I love you," I whispered into her bountiful curls as my hands wandered over her waist and hips to keep our bodies flush. I was aroused and knew she could feel it against her backside and I couldn't exactly recall why I didn't want to make love to her this morning.

"I love you," she sighed as her body responded to my touch and she arched her back as one of my hands slid up between her breasts to capture her throat. My tongue danced up her neck to her ear and she moaned lightly, as if she was trying not to but it escaped anyway. I released the sash of her wrapper. It fluttered open but I couldn't see the line of her skin it exposed so I trailed my evil hand down from her throat to explore slowly.

She trembled where she stood, her breath panting slightly as I felt the smooth skin of her décolletage down between her pert breasts over her flat stomach, around her navel to the apex of her thighs. I merely cupped her in my hand and she shuddered against me, a small sound parting her lips. I wondered if she was sore from last night, I wondered if I should stop, I wondered if I should pick her up and throw her on my bed, I wondered if she would let me make love to her standing again, I wondered if she wanted me to make love to her now, I wondered what it would feel like to have her on top of me, to have her take me in her mouth, to have her bent over in front of me. I wondered so many sexualized things with my hand covering her warm womanly place. And then I recalled my significant lack of restraint both last night after our bath and now as well.

I let her go and stepped back, shaking my head to clear the fuzzy sex thoughts as my hands burned with the feel of her. "Forgive me..." I breathed out, "I did not mean...to get so...carried away this morning..." I felt like an idiot as she closed her wrapper and looked at me over her shoulder. Her eyes were blazing with passion and bright with mischief.

"It's okay, my love...I liked it." And then she fled my room, leaving me with my mouth open and my soldier at attention. She liked it...

Having her say she liked it was achingly arousing and I decided to go douse myself in cold water before I changed my mind and followed her to her bedroom. I dressed quickly after my impromptu shower, picking up the book she'd dropped and went out to the kitchen to make some tea. I felt invigorated and when she emerged in a simple pale lavender dress with her hair braided down the side of her neck I smiled like a fool in love. She returned my smile like a woman in love and my heart soared.

We sat to drink our tea at the table and I will admit that I imagined wholly inappropriate things while pretending to be polite. Things like tossing up her skirts and making love to her in the kitchen, on the table, bent over the chairs or in my laboratory with the rainbow lantern I'd fashioned glimmering off our bare skin. Things one should not be contemplating at breakfast time.

I stayed in my seat, telling myself that it all could happen in time. I just had to be patient. She asked my opinion of her contract offer and we discussed it. It was a fair offer for one so new to the scene but I told her it was entirely up to her. She didn't need to work as my wife, but if she wanted to, I would allow it. I brought up the book, since I noticed it was one of my medical texts, and asked if she was worried about some sort of illness. She blushed lightly and shook her head but asked if she could take it with her and I, of course, said yes. She also asked if I could go over some of Hannibal with her before bringing her back and I was happy to oblige. Better to keep my concentration on things other than her pink mouth and fine curves.

We warmed her voice with some scales and arpeggios and a few quick run throughs of Hannibal's music before I brought her back to her dressing room. I promised the issue of the hole would be solved today and told her I'd be here waiting after rehearsal. I drew her into my arms to say good bye and she deftly removed my mask before her rosy lips met mine passionately. I drowned in her kiss, drowned in her love, drowned in something I thought was impossible for me but so beautiful and life altering that I was humbled before it. We broke apart breathing heavily and she caressed my unmasked cheek.

"My heart beats for you..." she whispered as I disappeared into the dark tunnel. As much as I longed to stay with Christine every second I could, I had a meeting to attend and did not want to be late. I quickly made my way to the roof and waited for Meghan Giry.

When she arrived I stepped half out of my shadows and bowed to the pretty wide eyed blond.

"Mademoiselle."

"Bonjour Erik," she said excitedly and I stiffened at her use of my name. She noticed and her hand flew to her mouth, and French came out from behind it rapid fire, "Oh forgive me, Monsieur. Christine speaks of you so often that I forget we are not introduced."

"Do not worry," I tried to relax. "I do not mind if you call me by name." I bowed again, "Erik Karan at your service."

A smile lit her face and she came a little closer. "I've wanted to meet you for so long, since that first time, but I never ever saw you again. Were you avoiding me all these years?"

My devious mind was whirring, "I was not permitted to make your acquaintance."

"Permitted?" before she could voice her question I answered it.

"Your mother..." I trailed off as anger flashed on her face.

"Oh, she is just too much! She's always going on that you are evil! Just ridiculous!" She looked me up and down, "You certainly are fearsome but I know you are not evil." This was proving to be an interesting meeting.

"There are many who would disagree with you. How can you be so sure?" I tried to play up the shadows I stood in and make my voice a little scary but none of it fazed little Giry. She pursed her lips.

"You pay my mother way too much money to care for your measly amount of mail. She barely does anything for you! And I know it was you who bought Cecile the new slippers and you bought Christine that cloak..." she studied me carefully and then came closer still, which set off my uncomfortable meter. "At first I was jealous of Christine, I always imagined I was the special one. I was the only one who had actually ever seen you and the only one who knew you truly existed. I was the only one who knew what you looked like..." her eyes hovered on my masked face.

"You do not know what I look like," my voice was slightly harsh but she was standing very close and I wondered if she was going to touch me and she was jealous of Christine?

"I would like to," she looked so honest and open and sweet. "If you can trust me, I would be your friend." I was more than a little shocked by her offer and stepped back farther into my waning shadows. She crossed her arms, "I do not plan to give Christine up, and I doubt you are going to give her up so I don't think you have a choice in becoming my friend." Her chin rose defiantly making her look very much like her mother.

"I would be your friend," I assured her, "But your mother will not be happy about it."

She waved her hand in dismissal, "She doesn't have to know for now." I smiled hesitantly and Meg grinned and held out her hand, "Monsieur Karan, my name is Meghan Giry but most people call me Meg."

"Which do you prefer?" I stepped forward into the light, towards her outstretched hand, and her eyes widened dramatically, her head tilting back to accommodate my height.

"Whichever..." she was slightly breathless.

"Then I shall call you Meghan," I took her hand and bowed over it. When I straightened her brow was furrowed in confusion.

"You are so...polite."

"You thought I would not be?" I raised a curious brow at her and she laughed lightly.

"I just...wasn't expecting such...civility."

"I think I have just been slandered," I was amused by her open demeanor, she just said whatever was on her mind.

"Oh, no, Monsieur, I didn't mean to offend you, you are just...so different...from what I expected." Ah ha. Time to implement my plan to kill off the phantom and leave a man in his place.

"My father would not be pleased with me if I treated ladies with anything less than the utmost respect."

"Your father?" she was surprised and I leaned forward, my playful side much easier to bring out with Christine in my life. I was more aware I had a playful side with Christine in my life.

"You didn't think I was some true mystical phantom who actually lived in the cellars and toyed with all of you?" She blushed and looked away.

"Maybe I did..."

"Well, I am not..."

"But why does your mail come here?" Good question, Meg.

"There are some things I do not want my father to see," it was all I could think of and I took control of the conversation. "Do you wish to keep asking inane questions? Or do you wish to discover the secrets of the Phantom? I do not have all day."

She bowed her head, "Please continue." I withheld a smirk.

"The rumors started because of my mask, if I ever do show you my face you will understand why I wear this thing," her eyes were once more riveted to me. "The managers are pig headed idiots and do not listen to any of the patrons when it comes to matters of importance..."

"Wait, you are a patron?"

"My father and I hold Box 5."

"But that is the Phantom's box." My brow went up again.

"It is, is it?" she blushed and mumbled an apology and I was having way too much fun. "As I was saying, the idiot managers would not listen to my advice as a patron so I fabricated a ghost. The rumors were already quite bad so it was easy to get the fools to listen. My advice has helped and now my student is a success as well. Hopefully they realize Christine is much more talented than that hog they call a soprano." Meg giggled at my description of Carlotta.

"So why don't you buy it?"

"Excuse me?"

"The opera. You could buy it and run it yourself. You seem quite knowledgeable in that area and I'm sure you have the money for it by the way you throw it around..."

"Throw it around...?" Meg was proving to be difficult to keep up with.

"Your money. Christine's new clothes, mother's salary, I'm not stupid." But she was looking at me like I was. I stepped back into my comforting shadow, it would only be here for another few minutes and then the blazing sun would wipe most shadows from the roof. I pulled out my watch. It was twenty to nine and she would have to go shortly. Time to ask my favor.

"Why do you wish to be my friend? Is it because of my money?"

"What?" she was genuinely surprised, "No! I mean, having nice clothes like Christine's would be nice but no, that's not why...I just really wanted to...Christine is my friend...there's no reason to go assuming...humph," her arms crossed angrily. "I don't want to talk about that right now." Fine with me because I was lost.

"Then can I ask you for a favor, Meghan?" she relaxed at my gentle question and nodded with a tentative smile. "I have so many things to take care of, with work and what not, that I will be leaving Christine unattended for many hours of the day. Her recent debut has brought her to the notice of all of Paris and she is so trusting and caring that I think she would walk into a disaster without even knowing it. If you could just make sure that nothing befalls your friend I would be most appreciative."

Meg studied me for a long minute as my shadow waned a little more. "You want me to babysit her?"

I rolled my eyes, "If that's what you will call it then yes, babysit her for me, watch her for me, make sure nothing happens to my angel. Please Meghan." Begging was not beneath me.

She stared at me silently and then dropped her eyes, "I'll stay by her side. She is very trusting and it could get her into trouble." Relief flooded me.

"Thank you so very much, Meghan. I must go." She reached out for me.

"Wait! When will I see you again?" I recalled Christine asking the same thing up here a few short months ago and turned back slowly.

"You wish to see me again?"

She looked exasperated, "It's sort of hard to be someone's friend if you never see them."

I smiled for her, "I've never really had a friend before, you will have to excuse my lack of knowledge. Can I write to you when I have some time for a visit?"

Meghan Giry smiled right back at me, "That would be lovely...Erik."

"Until we meet again, Mademoiselle," I bowed and promptly left. I felt buoyed. Meg's attitude around me was a far cry from her mother's but I did worry that if Antoinette had her little talk with Christine, Meg would be present. I knew I would not lose Christine over anything Antoinette said but now I found I didn't want to lose Meg either. I was greedy and a friend was something I never thought I would have and Meg was quite charming.

A lover, a father, a friend. So many gifts were being bestowed upon me that I wondered and worried briefly that I would eventually wake from this dream and find out I was still all alone in my darkness.