Episode 28: SICK AND STILL RAGING!

(Dragoritus- So I'm still sick now I'm coughing and I fuckin hate it! OP I saw the gameplay trailer... OH MY FUCKIN GOD HE'S GOT A FACE FULL OF BEARD!

Chuck Norris- I approve.

Dragoritus- Y... Yes sir.

Deadpool- Kissass!

Dragoritus- Quite you!

Deadpool- Bring it!

Dragoritus- Ok... so I've heard many things about the design of Emo Dante in that... dysfunctional piece of shit DMC..

Deadpool- Mr. Tam-Tam of Ninja Theory had to make our Badass Dante designed off of himself... FUCK YOU ATTENTION...

Dragoritus- No Let me say it please you didn't play 10 minutes of that game.

Deadpool- Fine... time to see you rage.

Dragoritus- FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUUU! ATTENTION WHORE! YOU ARE A EGOTISTICAL, SELF RIGHTIOUS, ARROGANT, PRIDEFUL ASSHOLE!

Deadpool- Holy shit...

Dragoritus- But I'll continued my sickness rage after THE MOTHERFUCKIN SHOW!

IN THE LEGENDARY BAR OF BADASSES!

Death was with, Bayonetta, Raven, Dante, War and Asura all of which sat in the bar staring at Kratos who had grown a beard and asked "What?"

Death then said "What's with the... beard?"

Kratos then stated "My beard makes my age more badass."

War then asked "No that's Chuck Norris' beard yours makes you look like an homeless man."

Dante then joked "With a issue with flees."

While Bayonetta joked "And looks like birds nest."

Raven then said "I'm not getting myself involved in this."

Asura then laughed and joked "I can't feel any manliness from you yet."

Kratos then squinted his eyes and said "You done?"

Death then asked "So what's with the beard?"

Kratos then placed his hands on his hips in a proud moment and said "I'm now a Spartan and a Viking!"

Deadpool then teleported in and asked "And how the hell does that work?"

Kratos then stated "I dunno it's just badass."

Death then pointed his hand at Kratos and stated "That makes no fucking sense!"

Kratos then shouted "YOU DON'T MAKE SENSE!"

Death then stated "Death makes more sense than a Demigod who became a god then was reverted back to a demigod and now is a mortal. People just fucking die in my sense."

Dante, Bayonetta and Deadpool then turn dot Death and leaned away and all said in unison "That was dark Death!"

Death then shrugged and joked "Good thing it's Darksiders."

Then suddenly a the doors opened and the iconic breathing was heard and the theme of star wars was heard as a man in black armor and a cape was seen as deadpan then said "Darth Vader my man!"

(Darth Vader- Once he was known as Anakin Skywalker a Jedi apprentice who couldn't keep his dick to himself, but after the stresses of the Clones wars and a vision of his wife pregnant wife dying while also being manipulated into the Darkside by a Sith lord he was given a choice to save the galaxy and possibly prevent his wife's death or try to save his wife by helping destroying the only hope in the galaxy... the Jedi knights.

But after get his limbs cut off except the one that was already cut off in the 2nd film and burned by molten lava, and finally loosing his wife and twin children he became the most badass space samurai to ever lived... Darth Vader.

Deadpool- Holy shit that was... AWESOME!)

Then Death asked "Darth Vader... oh wait HEY KYLO REN GUESS WHO?!"

Darth Vader then said "Please he has an obsession over me..."

Then a similar looking warrior walked out from the bathroom and saw Vader and raised both hands in the air and gasped and said "GOHHHH PAPY!"

(Kylo Ren- Darth Vader's grandson and seems to have a obsession over him... I mean who wouldn't? He's fuckin Darth Vader God dammit!)

Darth Vader the used the force to throw lo out of the bar and said "Sonny I am disappoint!"

Then Kratos was seen in the background rubbing his beard near a mirror with chuck Norris' picture on it and quietly said "Notice me Senpai..."

Bayonetta along with Death and Raven walked out with Dante following all stood in front of the bar as death asked "Who wants ice cream?"

Then Raven said "Sounds nice dad."

Bayonetta then said "Oh your cream?"

Dante then walked passed and coughed "That's what she said! Oh sorry but yeah as long as I get a strawberry sunday."

Death then squinted his eyes at Dante and said "Why are you with us?"

Dante then stated "I wanted a Strawberry sunday... cause I've got no money."

Death then sighed and said "Fine... but you'll have to kill a certain half demon for me."

Dante then asked "Ok who?"

Later

Dante and Death were in the crime part of town as Death pointed at the walking Emo Dante and said "That bastard! The guy tried to grope Raven's ass but I caught him though he escaped."

Dante then said "But nothing escapes Death."

Death then said "That's why you're here."

But then Emo Dante ran into Asura who recognized him from death and Bayonetta's wedding and shouted "YOUUUUUUU!"

Asura quickly grabbed Emo Dante and held him over head and rip him in half and began to punch him over and over again until he was punching through the Earth to the other side and threw Emo Dante back on the ground and proceeded to punch Emo Dante back to the other side and slammed him on the ground. Dante then reached out his hand and said "Jobs done."

Death then glared at Dante who gave a grin as Death said "Asura... Dante here had a problem and it seemed to be about your daughter."

Dante frowned and glared at Death who then said "You don't see it but I'm grinning evilly."

Then Asura shouted "DAAAAAAAANNNNNTEEEEEEE!"

Dante then ran as Asura chased after him while Death turned around and walked as Dante shouted "But death will eventually get her!"

Death froze as Asura shouted "DEAAAAAAAAATH!"

Death then squinted his eyes and said "Oh... shit!"

Theory of the Ninja... fuck you Tameem Antoniades

I may be sick and feeling like shit but my raging anger grows even more at this state...

Deadpool- Think of his power level increasing after hitting 9,000.

But Mr. Tameeem... sorry you don't even deserve the title Mr. Ohhh Tamee you're AN ATTENTION WHORE, BAD DUBSTEP LOVING, UNFRIENDLY, UNLOVABLE, YOU TALK SHIT ABOUT THE FANS AND BAYONETTA!

STRIKE 1

YOU INSULT THE FANS OF DEVIL MAY CRY WITH THE NOW TITLED "YWC: YOU WILL CRY! IN RAGE" AND COMPLETELY FUCK UP BY DESIGNING DANTE AS.. YOU!

STRIKE 2

YOU FLAT OUT SAID AS YOU MAKE GAMES THAT ONLY "YOU" WOULD PLAY AND THAT THE FANS' OPINIONS DO NOT MATTER EVEN THOUGH THE STORY OF YOU WILL CRY IS SHIT! AND I SAW WHAT THE SUCCUBUS LOOKED LIKE...

EVEN THE DEFINITION OF A SUCCUBUS FELT INSULTED FROM THAT DISGUSTING MAGOOT-LIKE DESIGN!

BUT WORST OF ALL...

DANTE AND VERGIL AS CHARACTERS... I CAN'T EVEN!

AWKWARD VERGIL IS A PUSSY IN THIS GAME, GOD I CAN'T EVEN, AT LEAST THE OLD ONE WOULD KILL SOMEONE FROM THE FRONT! AND HAD FUCKING HONOR! PLUS HE HAS A LOT OF AKWARD SILENCES FOR NO FUCKING REASON!

EMO DANTE IS A EMO ASSHOLE AND APPEARS TO HAVE A LOT OF CASUAL SEX, HIS TRENCH COAT IS MEDIOCORE AT BEST, HIS HAIR LOOKS LIKE YOURS! BUT THE WORST THING YOU DID TO HIM WAS TO HAVE A RUNNING GAG (INSULT) OF WHITE HAIR ON HIS HEAD AND MAKING HIM TEAR IT OFF AND SAID "NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!"

STRIKE 3 YOU'RE FUCKED THE FANS OF THIS SERIES IN THE ASS AND I CAN HEAR THEIR VOICES FROM ALL THE WAY DOWN HERE!

Deadpool- Since when did you get super hearing?!

AND THE WAY YOU EXPLAINED OF THE TWO OF THEM BEING NEPHILIM IS COMPLETELY SHIT! IF THE THEY WEREN'T ABLE TO BE CONCEIVED THEN HOW DID THOSE TWO COME TO BE?!

HELL DARKSIDERS DOESN'T STAY COMPLETELY TRUE TO THE BIBLE AND HAS IT'S OWN LORE AND STILL MANAGES TO HAVE THE NEPHILIM PROTAGONISTS LOOK BADASS!

You make me even more sick by looking at the comparison picture of you and Emo Dante!

Deadpool- Ok laid your ass down hahaha! your gonna make yourself throw up from this shit!

Dragoritus- You know... I wouldn't doubt it.