Bella's POV

I woke up with a strange sense of safety. I usually woke up on guard, but I was wrapped in a security blanket. I was engulfed in the warmth of Edward's arms, face half buried in his chest. I shifted my legs slightly, feeling the fabric of my jeans rub against itself.

He didn't do anything.

The thought brought a smile to my face. I could truly trust Edward.

I thought back to Edward's confession. I don't think so. Those four words made a huge difference. He doesn't like Tanya, or at least he doesn't think so. Knowing the little bit I do about Edward that probably meant that he didn't. I don't know why I cared so much. Edward could do whatever he wants.

The weekend passed without incident. Edward and I didn't talk about him lying with me, it didn't seem to be a problem but we didn't sleep together that weekend again. Emmett and I didn't work out that weekend either. We had a lot of homework and I wanted to do it myself, not with the semi-genius family. Carlisle also decided to give me a checkup. I've been with the Cullens for about 3 weeks and I've gone from a size 2 to a size 3-4. Carlisle was immensely proud, saying that meant I was getting healthy.

In school I didn't have problems. I wasn't bothered by too many girls so I didn't fight. It was a new experience. A new start, just like Carlisle said it would be. Another thing that was new to me was all the attention I was getting from boys. They would flirt with me during class or in the halls. I never snapped on them, because 1) I didn't want to cause problems and 2) I liked the attention.

"Bella" A voice called as I walked through the halls.

I had gym last period again. I was starting to wonder if that was a rule. Put Bella in last period gym. I smiled slightly.

I stopped and leaned against a locker, letting Jordan catch up to me.

"Hey sexy" Jordan flirted.

"Hey sexy" I flirted back.

This was like a routine, I had quickly gotten used to this.

Jordan leaned over me, his face a few inches away from mine. My heart sped up quickly. He had done this Friday and we almost kissed.

"You know I like you right?" He whispered huskily.

His breath fanned across my face and I smelt double mint gum.

I smiled. Jordan had a reputation in this school. He was the guy every girl wanted to settle down with, but he didn't want to settle down with anyone. He liked knowing there were girls all around school that would easily spread their legs for him.

"I know what you want" I whispered, trying to be seductive. From the lustful look in Jordan's eyes it was working. "You don't have to lie to get it, you know"

I couldn't help but feel guilty because I knew that the only reason I was doing this was 1) Charlie would never allow me and 2) I wanted to have control over something I do. Something no one would ever find out.

I put my hand on his chest and licked my lips. He smiles back at me.

"Do you mean that?" He whispered, pressing against me.

I thought about the question for a second. I knew he was surprised that I wasn't acting as innocent as everyone thought I was. I nodded, looking up at him. I blocked my head again, remembering that Alice is physic.

Jordan smiled. "Let's go then" He said, grabbing my hand.

No turning back now. I thought as he pulled me through the halls.

My heart thumped loudly in my chest. I was beyond nervous now.

"Are you a virgin?" He asked as we got in his car.

I'm guessing we're doing this in his car. At least the windows are tinted.

"No" I whispered.

"Good"

I faintly heard the late bell ring for class.

"Where were you during gym?" Alice asked when we all got home.

"You should know" I said easily but feeling guilty. "I mean, you are physic."

"You hid your future from me" Alice said angrily.

I knew she hated when I did that to her, but it was better than lying. I shrugged my shoulders. Somehow I doubted anyone would be okay with what I did today, or understand. I mean, I didn't even understand after I had already done it.

Maybe I'm crazy. And a slut.

Edward stormed in the house a few seconds later. His eyes held anger and hurt in them.

"What's wrong?" I asked worriedly. I haven't dealt with an angry Edward since he grabbed me.

"Oh nothing" His tone burned me, I flinched. "I spoke to Jordan afterschool today. He caught me by my car right after you and Alice left."

I felt the blood drain from my face.

"What does Jordan have to do with anything? He seems like a fine kid to me." Alice said, confused.

"He just wanted to ask if Bella and I were related by blood."

"Why does that matter?" Alice asked, more confused than before.

"Shut up" I said quickly.

"Why should I!" Edward yelled, infuriated.

Emmett and Rosalie walked in the house and I realized we were still basically in front of the doorway. We were barely in the house.

"What's going on?" Emmett asked, looking around. Esme must have been thinking the same thing because she ran down the stairs and repeated him.

"Shut up Edward! You should just mind your business!" I yelled. At this point Edward and I were a few feet apart and glaring at each other. "I didn't say shit about Tanya so don't you go saying-"

"Yeah Bella" Edward screamed, cutting me off, his face turning red in anger. "Well in case you didn't know, she's my girlfriend and I STILL didn't FUCK her!"

Edward's words seemed to slap me. Tears welled in my eyes.

"You aren't my boyfriend" I said, losing all the force in my voice. It was replaced with hurt than I didn't understand. "So shut up. And if you want to fuck her, then go ahead. No one is stopping you."

Edward was glaring holes into my eyes. "How could you do something like that Bella?" Edward asked angrily, but a little quieter.

"Wait, Bella did you…" Esme's voice trailed off.

Shame filled me, but my anger exploded. "Oh so we're playing snitch now?" I asked angrily, glaring back at Edward. "Okay. Yeah I fucked Jordan, for no reason, because I wanted to. I don't know! I did something slutty, but at least I'm not planning to hurt anyone." Shame filled Edward's eyes, but I felt the confusion around me. "Why don't we tell Esme how you don't like Tanya; how you probably never did? Let's tell her how you plan on hurting Tanya; how you always planned it. Damn, you don't feel so perfect now."

Esme gasped. I felt bad, I knew Esme blamed herself for not raising Edward right, she wouldn't understand that it wasn't her fault.

"An eye for an eye" I whispered to Edward maliciously.

Edward's eyes were flickering between hurt and anger. Then they flickered between hurt, guilt, and shame. He shook his head at me sadly.

"You're not hurting anyone but yourself." He whispered.

I knew he was right, and the tears finally spilled over.

"And me"

I turned away from Edward quickly, ignoring his last statement. I walked up the steps and heard him behind me. I knew he was going to his own room. We were both going to deal with the hurt we had somehow managed to inflict on each other.

Carlisle came home late that night. We had already eaten dinner. The dinner table had been oddly quiet, tense. I wondered if everyone was anticipating another blow up between Edward and me. There wasn't though. We didn't even look at each other. I was still wrapped in my thoughts and I was unbelievably sad.

At 9:00 someone knocked on my doors. I was lying in bed waiting for sleep to swallow me.

"Come in"

I looked up and saw Carlisle walk in and close the door. Would this be the first time he hit me? He sat on my bed a few inches away from me. Or worse?…

"Bella, honey…" Carlisle started off.

"I don't want to talk about it" I said, turning my back to him.

His hand touched my back softly, but I stiffened.

"We need to talk" He said softly.

His hand was still on my back, and I was unbelievably tense. My muscled seemed to be locked in defense. Panic was slowly edging its way into me.

"Only talk" I said quietly, my voice wavering in panic.

"Of course, Bella. What would you-" Carlisle stopped in midsentence. His hand disappeared. "Oh, Bella I'm sorry. I didn't mean to give you the wrong impression. Please sit up so we can have a serious, much needed talk."

I sat up slowly, facing Carlisle, and leaning against my headboard.

"Okay Bella," Carlisle said quietly. "First of all, we need to get this thing out of your head. I'm not going to do anything to you. I'm not Charlie. I would never do anything to disrespect you in that way. I took on the responsibility of being your father figure; I would never do that to my daughter. I wouldn't hurt you"

I listened and watched Carlisle talk, he looked like he was going honest. I took in his words and tried to figure out if I believed him.

"The next thing is about what you did today. Esme told me." Carlisle paused and frowned. "I don't even know how to approach this subject or what to say."

"Then don't say anything." I said quietly.

"See I can't do that. I can't let you think that what you did was okay."

"It's my body, I wanted to, and you weren't even supposed to know about it. No one was. Edward needs to learn to stay out of people's heads." I said harshly.

"You know it isn't a choice"

"Well he could have just shut up! Why does it even matter to him?"

"You would have to talk to him about that" Carlisle said. "But back to the subject at matter. You can't possibly think what you did was okay."

"It was just sex, it's not a big deal, and people do it every day. Normal people. Why can't I be normal?"

"It's not about being normal Bella." Carlisle sighed.

"So what is it about?" I asked angrily.

"Bella what you did is not healthy, it's not okay, and it's not you!"

"Not me?" I laughed humorlessly. "I had already had sex before I moved in with you guys." I said angrily.

"You were raped, it doesn't count. What your father did to you wasn't okay! Do you understand that? He should not have taken it upon himself to take your virginity!" Carlisle was obviously angry.

"But he did! He didn't care about what was 'right or wrong'. You can't take it back! If he can do it, why can't someone else?"

Carlisle was quiet for a second. I wanted to slap myself. Why did I say that? I pushed myself further into my headboard.

"Is that what that was about Bella?" Carlisle asked, sadness seeping into his voice.

His eyes searched mine, with kindness and sadness. I dropped my eyes. Carlisle put his hand under my chin, making me look at him; but he didn't speak.

I looked at my alarm clock and saw that it was 9:30.

"I want to go to bed, goodnight."

Carlisle frowned and sighed. "Goodnight sweetheart."

My door closed a few seconds later and I lay down. Sadness swallowed me a few seconds later and sobs broke through my body. Why am I so sad?

Edward's POV

The next morning passed quickly. It was a quiet morning, something that didn't happen regularly. Actually, the quiet revolved around me and Bella. What happened yesterday was still hanging in the air and I had a feeling it would until we fixed things; Bella and me that is.

I watched Bella walk towards Alice's car and frowned. This morning she wouldn't be riding with me I guess. I noticed that she skipped breakfast, to Carlisle's displeasure. I also noticed that her eyes were a little puffy and blue; she cried herself to sleep. My frown deepened.

I pulled into the parking lot at the same time as Jordan. I automatically felt my anger flare. Did he know that Bella was only 16! He is turning 19 in a month, that's not okay. Alice parked next to Jordan's car as he got out. Bella stepped out and was facing him; she jumped in surprise making Jordan laugh.

I got out my car and walked towards Alice's car. Jordan and Bella were laughing at something. Suddenly I was consumed by a new emotion; jealousy. Bella and Jordan walked away as I caught up to Alice and Jasper.

"Are you okay?" Jasper asked feeling my jealousy and anger.

I nodded curtly. Alice was blocking her thoughts from me by playing a Britney Spears song over and over in her head.

"What are you hiding from me?" I said angrily.

"Nothing" She said faking innocence.

Tanya walked up from behind me and slid her hands around my waist. "There you are baby" She said happily.

Alice cut her eyes at Tanya and walked away with Jasper, whispering angrily.

"Hey" I said lamely.

She slid her hand into mine and I held it weakly. Her mouth ran a mile a minute while I walked her to her first period class, I only had to hum every few minutes to make her think I was listening. The day passed slowly.

We were transitioning to our last period class when I saw Bella. She was leaned against someone's locker.

I wonder how long they'll last. Someone thought, there thoughts focused on Jordan who was making his way down the hallway in Bella's direction.

No, no, no. These were my own thoughts.

Without even thinking about it I was heading towards Bella, trying to get there before Jordan. And get there first, I did.

"Bella," I said quickly, putting my hand on the locker next to her.

I saw her face change, her eyes darkened and a frown appeared on her face.

"Please listen to me" I said quietly, trying to talk before Jordan got to us and broke it up; trying to claim what wasn't his. "I really don't want you to be with Jordan. I know you aren't his girlfriend, and you'll probably never be. Jordan just wants you for sex; you deserve someone better than him. Bella please" My words almost ran together.

She looked over my shoulder, but her eyes held doubt. I couldn't figure out who she was doubting, me or herself.

"Bella, please, I don't want to see you with him. Do you know how much it bothers me to know that you…" I trailed off, not wanting to go down that road.

Jordan's thoughts were getting louder; he was trying to figure out what was going on. He didn't want to lose Bella, not after how good she was. I clenched my fist quickly. He couldn't have Bella, she wasn't his. My decision was made in a split second.

My hand cupped Bella's cheek. I leaned down and our lips touched.