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A/N: Honestly I can relate to Hiruma better than any other character of Eyeshield 21.
TheWonderfulShoe: Hahaha, that's why I like his character the most.
ValMSEnriquez: Me too.
crecentomoon: I'm a bit annoyed myself but fine most days. I'd like to feel sorry about Hiruma dying but you know me hahaha. And maybe she would say yes, in part 2 perhaps?
Guest: Yet another short chapter from me. Mainly because I'm typing on my phone because my laptop is dead or dying. About your request what is Hiruma assuring her parents for? Or do you want it to be a surprise from me?
Sho: Oh welcome back to the land of HiruMamo fandom.
OoOoOo
"You might not realize it but you love her." That was what Musashi muttered under his slurred speech before Hiruma left the said man to rot in that bar. His left eye was twitching from annoyance. What a fucking idiotic and completely baseless conclusion. Him love her? To even think that he was able to love. Yeah right.
But the thought nagged at him even as he came face to face with the subject of such idea. And it annoyed him even more to a level he didn't know he could possess.
It didn't happen immediately but one day as he was barking some orders to her, he was awestrucked. The fucking old man was right. And he hated the older man and the fucking Anezaki even more. So he allowed himself to think about this new development for an hour or two maybe maximum of three hours.
He was Hiruma Youichi, he didn't love. He never do love. Love was an emotion that he deemed useless. It only fogged up the brain. It can make you do things that were not logically and statistically significant.
No, he would never love. Not ever. He had learned to kill his emotions once, he could do it again. It wasn't that hard now that he had less emotional baggage to deal with. If he'd let himself slip up even a tiny bit, he'd come spiraling down into the boy he was once. And he would rather pull that trigger before downgrading into such ridiculous person.
Most people would kill to have emotional connections but not him. He would kill those who'd have emotional connections with him. He had been on that road once. Loving someone unconditionally then one day they dissappoint you, hurt you and break you. They would do just about everything to kill you inside. Until one day you'd realize for yourself that you had enough. And then you'd actually developed this immunity with all their shit. You'd become numb into your core. The cold and icy heart replacing what was once lively and warm.
There was no need for love or any other fucking useless emotions. With emotions, drama always comes along. And he didn't have the mental capacity to tolerate such things. It was fucking draining and time consuming. Time that he didn't possess. Time that if wasted could never be acquired back.
He was Hiruma Youichi and no, he never love.