Beta'd by Octoberland
Chapter 36 We all Fall
Bella's POV
"No," I whisper staring at Esme. "NO!" This time my voice carries the weight and conviction I truly want it to have. "I can't accept that. I won't. We have to at least try. Please, Esme, please."
"Bella." She shakes her head, her eyes soft and full of sympathy. "We don't even know where they are, or where the Pack has been keeping Jacob."
"Charlie knows." Alice steps closer, her beautiful face pulled into an expression of sudden determination. "Maybe if we take Bella to him, if she can see him for just a second..."
Esme turns and takes Alice by the arms, pulling her away from me to the other side of the room. I can see her lips moving, though I can't hear what she's saying to her. Ignoring them, I begin yanking on clothes. I have a course of action now at least. Going to the hospital will eat up precious time I don't have, but doing something is better than doing nothing and I have to try. I can't let Edward spend eternity with yet another stain on his soul.
"Rose, is Edward's car still here?" I ask as I jam my feet into my shoes.
"Yes."
I've barely given her a chance to answer before I race for Edward's bureau. I've never driven his car before, but I know where he keeps a spare set of keys and despite my nervous fumbling I find them easily in the top drawer. Rose catches me before I can get to the door. Her hand clamps down hard on my upper arm nearly jerking me off my feet as my forward momentum comes to an abrupt end.
Her eyes stare at me hard as I try to pull away. "Let me go, Rose." I cry.
"Jacob Black deserves to die for what he did to you, Bella." she hisses. "If you save his life, you'll never be free of him. He's a werewolf, nearly as immortal as our kind. He'll stay the same until he stops phasing, you know that. You'll always be looking over your shoulder."
"I don't care about Jacob, Rose. Whatever happens will happen, but not like this."
"Remember what he did to you, Bella."
The familiar feeling of rage that has been my friend over these last few days is still very close to the surface. I have to swallow hard to push it back down. "I'm never going to forget, Rose." I hiss. "Now let me go."
"Bella, this is . . . " Alice is instantly back at my side, but before she can finish her sentence Rose interrupts.
"I know where they are."
Shocked I can only stare at her for a second. My feet seem stuck to the floor as I try to understand what she's saying.
"You don't have to go to Charlie, Bella. I know where they are. Emmett texted me their location the minute he knew where they were going. They're just outside the North border of the Reservation."
"Take me." I plead with her. "Please, Rose." Her eyes close for a second and then she releases my arm.
"Okay, I'll take you."
I start to turn for the door and she stops me again.
"Bella, listen to me. We're probably too late; you know that right?"
"I have to try, Rose." My voice cracks as it rises in a near yell. "Either help me or let me go, please."
"Alright. Let's go."
"I'm coming too," Alice says, moving with a determined look to stand beside me.
"We'll all go." Esme adds. She plucks the car keys from my fingers tossing them on the dresser. "We'll be faster on foot." Before I can move her hands cup my face and she stares into my eyes with an almost frightening intensity. I've never seen Esme look so fierce. "Tell me you're sure, Bella. That you're not doing this out of guilt or because you're afraid. Tell me you understand that we will protect you always and bear that burden without remorse. All of us, not just Edward."
"I know that Esme." I whisper back around new tears that attempt to clog my throat. "But I don't want this. It won't undo anything that happened, it won't fix anything and Edward doesn't need this on his conscience. Neither do I."
Whatever she sees in my eyes or hears in my tone it seems to be enough. She nods once and then suddenly Rose is pulling me into her arms. On her back we race through the house and out into the cold gray afternoon. A light drizzle falls from the sky as I pray and hope that I'm not going to be too late.
Edward's POV
"I would never have hurt Bella the way you say I did. You lie. I only wanted to protect her from him. It's all I ever wanted." – Jacob, chapter 35
The ball of ice that has churned in my guts all these long weeks implodes at Jacob's words. Shards of ice begin to splinter and race through the venom in my dormant system, coating my mouth and drenching my tongue and palate. The flavour enhances the pure cold rage inside of me and I embrace it eagerly.
Jacob's thoughts bombard me as he shudders under the weight of his restrictions. Among them is a litany of useless excuses, a vile rant of delusional reasoning. My hate flares anew with each twisted, pathetic, morally bankrupt justification that spins through his mind.
I loved her, even before you. She was mine...
I will swallow his blood. Allow bitter, stench ridden, foul mouthfuls of it to fill my belly so the memory of his death will have its own distinct flavour. One forever savoured... "She was never yours, dog."
You will condemn her to a lifeless existence. She'll be like you, nothing more than a walking corpse...
When I hook my fingers and sink them into his flesh, I will relish the sensation of skin and muscle and sinew tearing, separating. Every one of his agonized cries will nourish me... "You refuse to believe what you've done because you're weak. You've always been weak. A child. Nothing more, nothing less."
I protected her when you left her. I saved her...
His gloating thought finds its mark. A vulnerable place that will never fully heal stripped raw again by the guilt I can never escape. One more reason to remember the pure trust he broke and the heart he broke with it. One more reason to make him pay in ways more painful than any he can imagine... "She made her choice and you couldn't stand it." I sneer the words coldly, finding my own mark.
I begin to circle him, ignoring Billy who continues to beseech me in his thoughts and with his words. Ignoring the other wolves and their ceaseless turmoil of emotions. Sam and his endless striving to control a Pack on the verge of mutiny. Sue Clearwater and her loss and pain. Old Quil and his bottomless well of hatred and pride. None of it exists as anything more than a buzz of background static, meaningless in all ways. There exists no thought or presence that will sway me from my desire to reap vengeance on the boy who dared to threaten the core of my existence.
He stares at me with hate filled eyes. She doesn't understand her choice, bloodsucker. You have her blind and brainwashed, believing in a sick, twisted, fucking fairytale...
He will beg for mercy before I silence his black mind forever. Beg and scream and plead until I have feasted on every tortured cry and sated myself on his suffering... "The only blind one here is you, Jacob Black. Your refusal to accept what you've done is the true definition of twisted."
"I...never...hurt...Bella. You...are...a...LIAR!" Jacob's muscles shudder and twitch like disparate entities as Sam's gag order is erased in his mind. The effort his vocalization takes is tremendous and the final threads of Sam's control begin to unravel. Jacob will not be held much longer. Smiling I circle faster, forcing him to turn to keep me in his line of sight.
"You say it's a lie, Jacob. Yet the only lie here is the one you just uttered. You said you only wanted to protect her from me, though we both know you wanted so much more than that. You wanted her for yourself. It's what you've always wanted, and you were willing to betray your own Pack to get it."
A guttural snarl erupts from Sam's throat as he listens to my words. A sound so deep and animalistic it should never have been born from the throat of a human. His head fills with the memory of our discussion at the hospital the day Emily had lost her child, and he moves closer to me. Despite the guilt and remorse that tear at him for all the actions he's been involved in, his decision to continue to protect Jacob from himself, and from me, remain steadfast. Just as they had that day when I'd asked him to let Jacob choose the final outcome. I expected no less. I have planned for no less.
"I know what you're doing," Sam snarls. "I told you then and I'm telling you now, I won't allow this." Despite his words his regrets are read easily. The attempt to force us to leave Forks, the plan that would not have seen Bella harmed were it not for Jacob's betrayal, are all actions that have cost him dearly.
My eyes flick to him and then away, refusing to be baited into a response. My small smile is mocking. I will never forgive his actions, nor will I forget, and yet he's of no more consequence to me than the insects that scurry beneath my feet.
Behind me the Pack once again shifts, restless and uneasy. They read Sam's thoughts, and again they are torn between instinct and right and wrong. Quil snarls low in his throat and Embry follows suit, both their thoughts hopelessly conflicted. Jacob, look what you've done, man. Bella didn't deserve this. None of us deserved this...
Like Sam their thoughts mean nothing to me. Too little too late, and if they suffer, so be it. It is so much less than they deserve.
Don't do this, Edward Cullen. You'll destroy everything. Nearly a hundred years of peace... You'll destroy everything inside of her, Edward. Bella cannot live in a world this dark. Search your heart, your mind, your conscience. You know I am right. She needs light the same way she needs air. You will suffocate her in this darkness and this hateful world you are creating. This burden will kill her inside... Your death or Jacob's. It won't matter which...
The Shaman who wants to save his son and the dream walker who can't save anyone is desperate now. Once I would have felt pity, but no longer.
I never wanted this. I just want to go home...
The young new wolves are of no significance to me.
KILL THEM. ALL OF THEM. NOW! WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR!
The Paul wolf stalks closer, his mind raging at Sam for action. He's not torn. He wants blood, his hot-headed nature ruling him as always. His desire is only a pathetic semblance of what I feel. What I want.
His emotions are nothing. He is nothing.
Jared. Shifting, ready. A follower allowing himself to be governed by Paul's emotions and thoughts. His haunches bunch in restrained power, coiled and ready. Through his eyes, like a background image imposed beneath my central vision of Jacob, I see Emmett smile, Jasper shift, and Carlisle's hands open and close. The movement is a signal. Emmett and Jasper respond perfectly to his silent guidance, shifting like sinuous wisps of mist to stand between Jacob and I and the Pack. No one will get to me without going through them. One more step and suddenly Sam is blocked by Carlisle.
There is nothing outwardly threatening about his action, but Sam transforms instantly. Exploding into wolf form he growls at Carlisle who bares his teeth with a small growl of his own in response. "Give me a reason, Pack leader," he hisses, turning the word leader into a snide sound of disgust and disrespect. "I haven't forgotten the night you came to my home and nearly cost my daughter her life for a third time with your pathetic inability to control your Pack."
As if in illustration of Sam's lack of control, the Paul wolf growls and begins to advance on Emmett. Without a strong leader his personal desires are getting harder and harder to resist. Emmett drops to a crouch, but Sam is quicker. Spinning from Carlisle, he orders the Pack down. I'm not surprised at how his order isn't fully acknowledged. Paul glares at him and though he makes no further moves, neither does he step back. Instead he maintains his threatening stance, his thoughts becoming increasingly hostile and mutinous.
Even this matters little to me.
Only one person matters. Only one. I circle Jacob faster, moving with a vampire's grace so that I appear to glide. His human eyes find my motion disconcerting and I smile again, drawing my lips up over teeth glistening with venom. Now comes the most difficult part of my plan. I must provoke Jacob past the point where Sam can control him. I must make him want my death as much as I want his, and I must do it in such a way that the choice is his and only his. As the true Alpha and Ephraim Black's sole heir, his power negates all others. One word from him and the Pack, Sam included, will be rendered powerless.
To avoid war, Jacob must embrace his hate as I have embraced mine. His mind shows me how very close I am to achieving my goal. I use the ice cold caress of my anger to block out everyone else around me. I have waited over a month for this moment and my rage is cold and focused. I know a century's worth of patience and waiting, and though it galls me to wait even one more second, I will do so to protect my family from the consequences of my actions.
I have only minutes left. Sam is losing control faster and faster. Hyper aware of his Pack's growing discontent and indecision he will have to make a choice. I can see his chosen path as clearly in his mind as if he'd spoken the words out loud to me. He will order the wolves to attack. Though I cannot read their thoughts, I know what my family will do. Carlisle, Emmett and Jasper will respond to their actions with lethal force. It will be shockingly easy given the weakened state that the constant turmoil and stress and their tormented indecision have bestowed upon the Pack. They are not prepared for this fight. Their immaturity and lack of fighting experience is no match for seasoned immortals like Carlisle and I. Or for the pure brute strength of Emmett, or Jasper's intense fighting skill.
This will be my last effort to save the innocent.
"Look at me, Jacob," I repeat, though it's hardly necessary. Like me he has no desire to look anywhere else. "Listen to me. I know the truth of that night. I know what you did and I know why you did it."
"Lies." His voice is more animal growl than human. Beneath his straining thighs new rips appear in the fabric of his jeans.
"She told you a secret that night, one you forced out of her by provocation." His eyes turn darker, mouth tightening, jaw clenching so hard that I can hear his molars grinding with punishing force.
Sam snarls a new warning. The Pack shifts again, somehow closer than before, whining low in their throats with unease.
Billy Black begins to chant. An ancient sing-song prayer echoing off the cliff face before us, calling to Gods and elements and useless powers that cannot sway the darkness consuming me. In response the sky darkens with heavier clouds and the wind seems to pick up around us, rifling through the long grass at our feet. An unspoken command has Seth and Embry ushering Sue and Old Quil farther away. If they resist I don't notice, mesmerized as I am by my prey. The bitter smell of him fills my nostrils, rank with the odour of dog and sweat and weeks of unwashed skin musky with stress and hate.
I move to Jacob suddenly, using the full extent of my speed and agility to invade his personal space and drop my tone to a mere murmur. The clawing need in me is a thousand times more potent than thirst. I ache to smash my fists into his sullen hostile face, to tear his eyes from their sockets and his gloating tongue from his mouth, smashing teeth and jaw... "Bella told you her and I would have a real honeymoon, that we would be together her and I in every way on our wedding night. I'd promised to make love to her, Jacob, and it was a promise I fully intended to keep." I hiss the words in his ear and then I'm gone.
"You couldn't stand that thought," I continue from my new position. His muscles spasm even more violently than before. One shoulder of his shirt tears at its seam to frame the dancing contortion of muscle beneath. His skin extends and retracts in a freakishly macabre state. "Even now, you can't stand it, can you? The thought of her and I together in that way?" The truths of my words are apparent in his expression and thoughts. A gloating thrill of power escalates my need.
"You'll kill her. You stupid...bloodsucker...leech..." His panting breath steams in the cold air matching the vapour that rolls off his overheated skin while his anger escalates.
"You're wrong," I hiss in reply. Again I dart forward, only this time I hiss in his ear from behind, startling him, making his nerve endings jump in his contorting muscles. His unease is a fragrance I inhale greedily, ignoring his stench. "I've loved her, Jacob." I whisper. "I've held her in my arms and loved her with my body and all she knew was exquisite pleasure. I never hurt her, not once. Only you did that."
Back to my previous position, I watch as my new confession takes root in Jacob's mind. More thread's snap.
"LIES!" Jacob roars at me, the trembling reaching its zenith. His phase is nearly inevitable. "I love her. I would never . . . Barely anything holds him now. Close. I'm so close...
Yes. Fight it off you bastard. You fucking loathsome dog. Hate me as I hate you so I can watch your anger turn to piss in your pants fear when I tear your throat out with my teeth . . .
"Lies?" I nearly laugh. "No, it is the truth and a part of you knows it. You heard her confession and you attacked her." My mouth fills with venom as my memories, both hers that she'd shared and my own from what I had seen, pour out of the box I keep them in inside my head. The last threads of my self control snap. "You slammed her against a wall," I snarl raggedly, drawing the pain to mingle with the anger. "Your hands bruised her body. Your weight snapped her ribs, her wrist. Your nails clawed her skin. Your teeth split her lips while you forced yourself on her, all while she pleaded and begged and cried for you to stop. Pleas you ignored. You tried to rape her Jacob, and when Charlie came home and interrupted your sick disgusting urge to take what she didn't want to give, you took his gun and shot him in the chest."
Each memory slams me anew and I ache to finally have an opportunity to show him how it feels to be helpless. How it feels to beg and be ignored...
"No..." He shakes his head, grabs handfuls of his own hair tearing at it. His mind is blank, he truly has no memory of what he did but my words, each one of them, find their mark. I don't allow him more time to think or to dream up new excuses or fake rational.
"Yes." I roar, the volume of my voice echoing so that the wolves flinch, their ears pinning down against their heads while their restless twitching grows more agitated. I hear Sam snapping his teeth at Paul, Jared's low growl, Seth's frustrated whimper. The noises blend in with the rushing wind and are lost in the hate that consumes me. "There is blood all over your hands, Jacob Black. Bella's, Charlie's." I pause for effect. "Leah's." His eyes snap back open and glare at me, the shaking intensifying again.
Jasper shifts like a shadow on a slow lazy summer afternoon. No one notices how much closer he is to Paul or the equally slow easy smile on his face that does not match the eager gleam in his eye.
Sam's growls are louder and now his teeth snap at Jacob as though he can force him down with aggression where words have failed. He needs to be in human form to communicate with Jacob, but he's reluctant to change back and now he is stuck between an impossible see saw. On one side the Pack. He's stronger in wolf form, capable of controlling them better. On the other, Jacob. Trapped in his human form Sam cannot repeat the commands Jacob is throwing off. Not that it would matter…
I take further advantage of Sam's indecisive weakness. "Leah tried to protect you from yourself, and look what it got her? Death."
Sam snarls yet again, his pain almost physical. Jacob shudders, his nails scratching gouges into his cheeks. Part fury, part sickened sadness and guilt tramples all his other thoughts. I scrape his mental wounds with more words, seeking the final break in his mind.
"And what a death it was," I sing song mockingly as though only he and I exist. As though his Father isn't pleading, as though I cannot feel and smell the hot reek of a werewolf Pack breathing down my neck. Their restless shifting and fear and frustration saturate the clearing in energy I can feel and taste. Still none of it matters. Only Jacob and the glorious rage binding us together beyond all else. "Such a difficult chore suicide is for a werewolf." I time my words to Billy's chanting, adopting his quiet tone, drawing images with my words that make everyone in this clearing burn. "She had to tear and slice and cut at her wrists again and again. Slashing open the wounds before they could fully heal in order to keep them open. In order to keep her blood flowing. When all her efforts were in vain, she brutally sliced through flesh and muscle to sever the femoral artery in her thigh and held that gaping wound open with her own two hands while her blood drained from her body in a growing pool all around her."
Sam had found her and his mind supplies me with all the graphic imagery I need to torture Jacob further. My own imagination and knowledge easily fill in any missing pieces of her death. "She died slowly and in unimaginable pain, Jacob. Her supernatural body fighting her every step of the way. All alone, and all because you wouldn't accept Bella's decisions and let us live in peace." His mental anguish grows and with it my pleasure. I crave his pain and I use my words like knives to stab deeper, tearing at his mind the way I soon will his flesh.
"You let her down, Jacob. You used her body, and you used her to try and get to Bella, though you knew as well as the rest of the Pack how her madness was growing. When it all backfired, she paid the price with her life, while you? You just stand here, as pathetic and weak as always."
I take a single step closer and regard him in fake mocking disgust. "You offered Bella yourself as a replacement that night Jacob, pathetically thinking that sex and love are two separate things. Pathetically believing she would ever want that with you. As if a creature as exquisite and perfect as she would ever want a dog to touch her in that way." Another step closer and I let my eyes rake over his body with disdain. "Not just a dog, but an incapable incompetent child as well. One who thinks force and pain equal love and tenderness. One who can't even rule the Pack that was meant to be his."
"I'll kill you. I'll kill you myself. I'll kill all of you filthy bloodsuckers." His body vibrates now in one constant tremor. Emmett moves closer to Quil, Jasper edges even nearer to Paul. From the corner of my eye I see Sam crouch low ready to spring at Jacob, but once again Carlisle blocks him. Their warning snarls mingle in the cold air but I have eyes and ears only for one.
"It's me you want, Jacob. Not them." I gesture to my family as though they are negligible, playing on his ego and rage. "I'm the one who's changing Bella. I'm the one she wants, the one she chose." Again I flash to him, forcing my breath into his face with each new whispered word. "The one whose name she cries out when I lay her willing body down on my bed and love her past every dark memory you left her with." Again I move away, mocking him with my voice and the movements that his human form eyes struggle to absorb.
"Just me. Just you. The way it should have always been," I tell him quietly, calmly beginning to circle him again, forcing him to move to follow me. Baiting him with the one thing he's always wanted. "No treaties to break, no families to hold us back." I smile without humor letting my mind once again fill with images of Bella, battered and broken. "Winner takes all," I lie, and he hears the words for what they are.
Not that it matters. Not that it ever mattered. He lunges at me transforming mid stride. Before his feet even hit the ground he orders the Pack down with such force and true Alpha strength they buckle and collapse in on themselves curling into the ground like chastised house pets.
With a lunge of my own I meet him halfway.
Bella's POV
Rose doesn't seem to be moving fast enough. Cold air whistles by my ears and the trees blur by my eyes, and still it doesn't seem fast enough. Panic causes my heartbeat to squeeze out in static bursts that make my head ring. Afraid I might fall off her back I cling harder, grateful I can't hurt her.
Esme and Alice keep pace with her easily. I know it's my weight and the awkward pull I put on her run that slows Rose. For the first time in weeks I think about how much easier all of this would be if I was like them instead of still human and useless. I never would have been asleep when Edward left, I'd be strong enough to have protected myself instead of putting them in danger. An equal instead of hindrance . . .
"We're going to have to cross into the Reservation to get where they are." Rose's words interrupt my thoughts.
"The treaty is already broken," Esme responds, her voice carrying easily to my ears despite the cold wind that whips around them. "It hardly matters now anyway."
Again it occurs to me what I've cost them and my heart breaks all over again. Nearly a century of peace between them and now... Unable to continue with the thought I look over at Alice. Though the speed makes everything blur the fact that she's keeping perfect pace with Rose gives the illusion that we're the ones standing still. I feel a nauseating lurch in my stomach but choke it back through sheer force of will. She's attempting yet again to call one of their cell phones despite the fact that it's useless. There is no reception out here, not even for the most advanced phone.
"How much longer, Rose?"
"Ten minutes. I think." She knows where we're going, though she's uncertain exactly of how to get there. The anxiety ratchets up to a new level making it hard to control my breathing. A panic attack now is the last thing I need, but I can feel it relentlessly brewing despite my best effort to keep it at bay.
Esme's hand on my back is cold and solid. "Breathe Bella," she murmurs gently. My heartbeat is giving me away.
"One thing for sure," Rose mutters. "Edward will hear us long before he sees us, Bella. Your heart is louder than a damn drum right now."
"He won't hear her. Not now. He'll be blocking everything. He'll be single minded. I know. I've seen it before…"
The words are so quiet they're barely words at all. I can't even tell who says them, or why, or if it isn't just the hiss of the wind rushing over my ears and not really words at all.
Alice is suddenly closer. "Bella. I just thought of something. Listen to me okay?" I nod and she continues, an expression of excitement touching her lovely face. "You need to try to reach out to Edward. It might be your only chance if you truly want to stop this."
"Reach out? How, Alice? I can't control my head, you know that."
"No. I don't know that, Bella."
"Alice. Bella doesn't need more pressure right now. Listen to her heart fly."
"She has to, Esme. She has to at least try."
"Alice I don't know how."
"Yes you do, Bella. Remember the night you had that panic attack? And Edward saw everything you remembered in your mind? And Jasper felt it? Jasper says he's never felt anything that strong before. The wave of your emotions was stronger than what he normally felt from you, even when you were at your most upset. It was so strong it took away his ability to control his own gift at first and he ended up sending it all out, sharing it with all of us."
"I didn't want that, Alice. I wasn't trying to..."
"I know," she interrupts a touch of impatience to her voice. "But you did do it. And Edward says you opened your mind to him when you first saw Charlie in the hospital as well. Both of those times you were so upset. You wanted Charlie to hear you. And I think you wanted Edward to know what happened to you that night. Maybe it was mostly subconscious, but I don't think it matters." She comes closer still, her eyes intense with emotion as she tries to compel me to believe what she's saying. "Try, Bella. You want Edward to hear you. You want to stop him from doing this. So try. Call him with your mind."
"I can't, Alice."
Her eyes flash with impatience. "I can't see around the wolves, but I know that Rose is going to turn right in a minute when we reach the creek. That means your shield is down. Try!"
Closing my eyes I let my head fall forward until it rests on Rose's shoulder. I have no idea what to do, so I do the first thing that I always do when I'm not with Edward. I picture him. In my mind he's standing in front of me, smiling that amazing crooked grin that makes the bottom fall out of my stomach. Instantly I feel some of the knots in my core loosen and I make the picture brighter, stronger, bring it into crystal clear focus until every subtle nuance of his face and expression is perfect. I think of how much I love him, need him. Now. Always. I think of how much I want to be with him, how much I want to belong to him in all ways. How much I wish there was nothing between us, ever. Not even the wall in my head...
"Please, Edward. Please. I need you... Don't do this. I don't want you to do this."
I barely feel Rose turn the way Alice had predicted she would. I don't notice that it has started to rain or that the wind is now driving that same cold rain into my face. My eyes are closed, but I pray again and again that my mind is not.
"Please, Edward. Don't do this... Please..."
Edward's POV
Jacob and I collide in midair. Having taken him off guard he's unprepared for my attack and the force of my body hitting his slams him to the ground forcing the air from his lungs. The exhalation draws his ribcage in and the thick muscle contracts in his midsection loosening my tenuous grip. He's strong. The power of his back legs drives us up off the ground, and in one fluid movement he forces me to let go, completely spinning away from me. Pain flares down my right side as his back claws rake against my skin, but I hardly notice. The cold rage inside of me more than counters the burn, and the sound of his nails snapping at the tips tells me the contact is not without consequence for him.
His mind gives him away when he tries to spin left and lunge for my leg. Jaws snap and miss as I move away, dropping my right hand to the top of his head before he can pull back. My fingers dig into the thick ruff of fur on his neck, plowing through to the muscle and tendon beneath. Hooking them there I clamp down hard, driving his entire upper body to the ground with enough force to hear a satisfying snap in his left shoulder. His howl of pain is even more satisfying.
It would be so easy to slam my knee down upon his prone figure and snap his vertebrae like a child's cheap, plastic toy. I can see his spine separating in my mind's eye with perfect clinical vision.
Too easy.
Releasing him with a low growl I yank his head back until the strain on his neck makes him whimper and look into his eyes with a sneering smile.
"Too easy." I snarl. "You don't deserve easy." Placing my other hand at his shoulder, I lift him from the ground and hurl him at the cropping of trees some seventy feet in the distance. He connects with another pleasurable smash and whimper, and I'm beneath him before he even hits the ground.
Jacob is falling sideways. Using all my speed I spin beneath him and punch upwards, envisioning in my mind the exact placement of the breaks in Bella's fragile, delicate rib bones. My stone hard fist slices through his thick coat of hair, compressing down his muscles until they flatten and thin with the impact. The bones beneath are stronger than hers, the flex greater. But I've put the full force of my upward lunge into the action and the bones bend to their limit and snap with the wet sound of cracking ice. His falling weight pushes my hand down and to the right allowing me to wrap my fingers around his hip joint. I dig them in sliding past muscle and tendon to bone, arresting his fall and separating the joint before I slam his body the rest of the way to the ground.
The Pack howls in sympathetic misery, twitching in their mental confinement, thoughts racing in disjointed angst.
Jacob flips to his feet easily despite his injuries. Already his mind shows me he can feel the beginning stages of the healing process. A tight tingling that mingles with the pain. He shakes his head once to clear it, his lip curling back over his saliva drenched teeth in a low steady growl. I dip to a crouch with a smile as his eyes turn almost red with rage, curling my fingers at him in a beckoning motion.
Come to me…
Lunging again he's more than predictable. He tries to overpower me, but I'm gone from the space before he can blink. Behind him I laugh mockingly.
"Over here, Jacob," I taunt. His dislocated hip hinders him in his turn and he's favoring his left front leg where his broken ribs grate painfully against one another beneath their bruised encasement of flesh. "Does it hurt?" I ask in an almost conversational aside. My tone changes instantly to an angry hiss with my next words. "It can't hurt you anywhere near as much as it hurt Bella when you drove her tiny body down against the arm of her living room sofa crushing her with your weight. Did you hear her ribs snap, Jacob? Or were you too far gone in your sick lust?"
His thoughts roll with the images my words create, but as always it's filled with another accusation that I am a liar. Stalking me slowly now, looking for a weak spot, he tries to taunt me with images of his own in a useless effort to provoke me.
Bella, laying beneath me, naked, covered in bruises and blood soaked gashes pleading while I ravish her with a depraved red-eyed countenance.
His wolf like grin is followed by a short laughing bark as he arrogantly assumes his twisted imaginings will rattle me. Instead I only grin back, relishing the rapid deflation of his amusement. "Oh the images I could show you, Jacob. If you could see in my mind, the things you would see."
Bella, lying beneath me, naked. Flawless beautiful skin covered in a moist sheen of perspiration, face tilted upwards with lips begging to be kissed. Pleading with me not to stop, to never ever stop… Mine. Mine. Mine.
"But then I would never show such images to a child," I mock. He lunges again, so predictable, so ruled by his hot-blooded nature and temperamental immature mind…
Edward, stay focused. Don't be cocky. Watch your back.
He should get lower. Get lower Edward, better center of gravity.
Be careful son, don't underestimate him.
The thoughts of my brothers and Father invade my mind at the most inopportune time. They distract me right as Jacob lunges and my mind fights to understand what the meaning is. Realizing Bella's shield is down takes me out of the moment and his lethal jaws snap only millimeters from my face and neck. I manage to twist my head away but it costs me. His weight slams into me without restraint, large paws slamming against my shoulders, scrabbling for purchase against my marble like skin. I manage to stay on my feet using my own substantial strength to push back against him. Like two marionette puppets on strings we jostle and dance in a backwards movement that carries us deeper and deeper into the thicker expanse of trees.
Again Jacob gives himself away in his thoughts. As soon as he decides to push forward with more strength and go for my exposed throat, I drop my weight throwing him off balance. He staggers and I drive back up again shoving my shoulder into his chest, forcing him back. The meaty thunk of connection fills me with pleasure, his flesh bruising and swelling instantly. While he staggers under the momentum I gather my head back together again and reach for his left front leg. Done with toying, done with playing, my hate expands and everything becomes clear and easy and oh, I've waited so long for this. Grasping his limb, I spin again and with my back to his chest I snap the leg like a twig. He howls and I drive my elbow back into his partially healed ribs. The new crack is a thousand times better than the first, and his whimpering cry satisfies something primal and dark inside that begs for sustenance.
Spinning again with blinding speed I smash one hand to his chest digging in for purchase. I could easily rip his heart from the cavity where it rests, but instead I dig past fur and flesh as he howls. Hot blood reeking of dog and life gushes over my hand and arm and still I dig deeper past slippery layers of flesh and fat and muscle. Down until I find purchase in his chest bone. Bone that crackles like brittle shale as it shatters beneath the punishing force of my grip and the razor sharp diamond hard ends of my nails.
The smell of his blood triggers something darker than thirst and I lean close until my face is in his, my voice a lethal hiss. "For every ounce of pain you gave her, I will give you tenfold. Beg me, dog. Beg the way she did. Plead if you can find a voice outside of this pain."
His mind rears, retracts in on itself in shock and disbelief and endless arrogant pride. He cannot believe the wounds I've inflicted so quickly. Spinning again, I remove my hand from his insides and drop him to the ground.
Fury races through him once more and fueled by rage and adrenaline he instantly tries to leap at me though he's weak and off balance. I spin and we collide, my hands finding his jaw, sliding past his teeth so that I can clamp around his jaw bone, ignoring the razor sharp edges that spill my burning venom into his mouth. He chokes and we spin again, smashing against another tree, then another and another until we are nothing more than a dancing blur in the minds that watch us. Minds that beg and plead and rant in a language I no longer understand…
His mouth fills until he's choking as I purposely grind my flesh against his teeth, hearing them, feeling them splinter in his mouth. The hot cloying stench of his wolf blood combines with his pain filled thoughts until I'm frenzied with dark glorious pleasure. Like the merciless predator I am I toy with him once again, snapping his jaw, spinning again as he flails, uselessly raking me with claws and snarling in pain and anger and confused fear. Trees snap at our passing, branches dropping like leaves, trunks quivering, falling as I smash him against every surface I can find, faster and faster. Harder and harder, his blood smearing, dripping like a rain of red and pain, splattering the ground, painting the bark, staining and steaming in the cold.
His mind revolts, turns in on itself in self pity as I block every useless trick he tries to employ. Immature and inexperienced he's no match for me. He repeats the same lunge, the same swipe, the same pathetic reliance on brute strength that had helped him win against several newborns in the fight against Victoria. But I am no newborn and I see every thought he has. Even the ones where anger turns to desperation and where desperation turns to fear then back again to desperation.
Edward. Please. Hear me. I don't want this… Not like this… I love you, please…
I almost falter again. Bella's voice in my mind hauntingly real, but the ice cold veil of rage contains me, locks me in my hate and need. I reach for Jacob in mid spin, smashing him to the ground. His bones rattling, his fur matted with damp earth and leaves and blood…
Please…
Bella. She's suffered so much. So much pain and illness and sadness, all things she never deserved. Not her. Not my light, my life, the rhythm of my useless silent heart. I failed her, but never again. She will be safe. I will make her safe and he will suffer. Jacob Black will suffer and die…
The ribs on Jacob's right side shatter as easily as did those on his left. His right front leg smashes just as satisfyingly as his other. His skin slices beneath my nails. His flesh tears beneath my clawed fingers. Muscle shreds as easily as paper. Sinew and tissue and substance, tendon and cartilage. All of it fails beneath the punishing pain I inflict again and again and again. After the wound I inflicted on his chest I let not one drop of his blood touch me. Nor do I even once use my teeth to tear at him. The scent of his blood is foul and not what I crave from this death; only pleasure in the primal sense can slake the thirst I feel now.
When his mind is consumed by physical pain I remember every minute injury he inflicted on Bella and find a way to make him suffer more. When his thoughts turn at last away from himself and to the Pack, I beg him to call them. To give me a chance to nourish the cold hard ground with the blood of everyone who dared to place my reason for living in danger.
His thoughts have the Pack whining and howling, trying to creep forward to save his useless hide. He orders them not to act despite the fact he knows death is very close for him. His tangled thoughts show loyalty and protection. Finally the child becomes a man. Not that it matters. Too little too late and he will find no mercy in me.
I curl my right hand around his throat. The feel of his larynx bunching and contorting is like glass covered in tissue paper it's so fragile. Inside all the fight goes out of him, both mentally and physically. In my grip he transforms back to human form, as though he no longer has the strength or life essence to maintain his wolf shape. The light in his eyes is dim and accepting, as too are his thoughts. Like a fading light his mind no longer thinks in words I can read. Only in flickering images too disjointed to make sense perhaps to anyone but him.
"The Pack will live if they choose," I hiss at him, and lift him from the ground so that he dangles from my clasp. "But not you, Jacob Black. You've fallen beyond redemption." I lean close to drink in the last of his suffering and smile. "I'll see you in hell."
Bella's POV
Rosalie stops suddenly and I see Alice's arm restraining her. She looks at me, pain flashing in her eyes.
Panic flares and I kick against Rose's hold. "No, let me go. No, Alice. You can't see, you can't know…"
"Bella, she doesn't need to see." Rose lets me go spinning to balance me when my knees nearly give out sliding from her back. "We can hear. It's over."
Esme's hands reach out as though to hold me, but I find my balance and start to run. In the distance I can see something. Like people or shapes or…wolves lying in the grass. God, no. I can't be too late I can't.
"Bella. No!"
"Let her go, Alice. She needs to see it with her own eyes…"
Neither Alice nor Rose's words mean anything.
My feet are so hopeless, yet somehow I find more speed and I'm closer than I think. Crashing through a small cropping of deadfall I suddenly spot Edward. My eyes rake over him looking for injuries and finding none. I tell myself no matter what happens, no matter what has happened I can deal with anything as long as he's okay. He looks okay, but then he reaches down and picks something up. Something dark and matted and huge…
Jacob. Oh God. He's dead, I'm too late. I'm too late. I'm too late.
Before my eyes Jacob changes. He hangs from Edward's hand limp and covered in blood and dirt and things I can't imagine. Things I don't want to imagine. The smell of blood is everywhere, a thick copper reek that clogs my throat until I taste bile.
Edward leans close to Jacob. His face is a dark sneering mask, his eyes black as midnight, lips tight over teeth that gleam like serrated metal.
"I'll see you in hell."
I try to scream, to tell him to stop but my throat clenches down in panic and sickness and all that comes out of my mouth is a soundless plea. "No…"
Edward's head cocks to the right, his body turning very still. My heart slams in my chest with sudden brutal thumps that make me wonder if it hadn't stopped for the space of impossible moments. His nostrils flare and my mind begs.
Please, please. Not like this… Stay with me, I need you…Please…
Finally he turns his head and our eyes meet. I ignore the body that hangs from his hand and the memories that threaten to boil over. I ignore the way his eyes are so black they've consumed all color so that not a single slice of iris is discernable. I manage finally to find some volume in my voice as everything goes blurry with hot blinding tears.
"No."
A tremor goes through him breaking the marble statue form and I repeat the word quietly, pleadingly.
"No."
His head cocks a bit further and my hands curl at my sides in useless fists. I ache to reach out to him but I know my Edward isn't there right now. I can only pray he's inside, listening.
"Please."
It happens slowly. In increments. The hand around Jacob's throat loosens. His eyes focus on me fully. His stone still body finally seems to move and his head turns back to Jacob with a low harsh growl that grows and grows until it is a roar that fills the air. If I wasn't so frozen I'd cover my ears that begin to ache with the sound.
"Please," I whisper again, knowing he can hear me. Praying he can hear me. Behind me I feel Esme, Alice and Rose watching, waiting. Rose is very close and I can feel her almost poised as though one wrong move will have her snatching me into her grasp and running away. Jasper, Carlisle and Emmett are crouched, watching the Pack that remains frozen in the distant clearing.
Edward's growl finally dies and his eyes fall shut. One last small tremor and he releases Jacob the way someone would let a bag of trash fall from their grasp. The sickening thud of Jacob's body hitting the ground sends a wave of nausea and fear rippling over my stomach. I can't assimilate, can't think, can't even really breathe until suddenly Edward turns back to me, his eyes finally focused, his heartbreakingly beautiful face a quiet mask I cannot read. In less than a few impossibly fast strides he's in front of me. Falling to his knees he wraps his arms around my middle and with one shaky deep breath his face presses into my stomach.
The sound of the rain hitting the leaves and ground mingle with the harsh panting breaths that slip out of my mouth sounding like sobs. I realize I'm still saying please over and over again, though I can only barely hear the words with my throat still clamped tight around each released syllable. The top of Edward's head is wet from the rain, darkening the copper to tarnished brass. Slowly, as though I'm in a dream, I watch my hands come up and curl into the cold damp strands. Finally the air comes easier into my starved lungs and my heartbeat slows while my tears fall with the rain and land in Edward's hair.
Jacob remains where he fell, utterly still save for the barely noticeable rise and fall of his bloody, torn chest. He's alive. For now.
A/N I told you this wouldn't be pretty, lol. Some of you will think this was harsh, others will think it wasn't harsh enough. Whichever side of the fence you're on I ask that you have faith in me and in my vision, this isn't over yet. Not for Jacob, and certainly not for Bella or Edward. Either way I hope you'll take a minute to let me know what you think.
To everyone who is still reading. Thank you!
Aleea