Aloha everyone! :) lovely to see you all! :D New chapteeeer! Oh and special thank you to artistofthemind, because you gave me a hole new idea for this story! : YOU ARE AWESOME!
Clary's POV
My life had changed. Entirely, insanely changed. And then I was still making an understatement...
In less than 2 months I had become orphan, had moved out of my home and moved in into a... gigantic villa, and I was one of the most popular and known people at school because of my new boyfriend -my new, amazing, perfect boyfriend that somehow liked me too- and for the first time in years, I was... happy.
I got to admit, I still didn't like it if people were staring at me just because I was spending time with the Lightwoods, and I totally felt guilty by all the expensive gifts the Lightwoods –and especially Jace and Izzy- gave me, and I missed my parents like hell. But overall, I was happy, and that was more than I had been in the past 4 years. Was everyone that had told me that time healed everything, right? That in time, you got used to any situation? That the past got blurry and you eventually almost forgot everything bad you did? Or at least didn't think about it 24/7? I really wanted to believe it, believe that one day I wouldn't be sick to my stomach when I thought about my past but I could just...Give it a place at least. But my nightmares were telling me otherwise. Every night that I woke up screaming, panting, silently crying, I knew it was just some excuse. An excuse people had invented to shush their conscience... But I knew the truth: some things carved so deep into your heart, so immensely deep that nothing can ever heal it. Nothing... Or no one.
I hated it if I was in this mood, so tired and sick of myself and... everything, that I just wanted to end it all. I knew that wasn't a way out. That it was just cowardice to run from my problems like that, but god did it sound tempting sometimes...
I heard my phone ringing and snapping me out of my reverie. I looked at the caller ID: Maia. Maia had become one of my best friends last weeks, and I loved the talks we had between our classes. I tried to shake off my depressing thoughts. By the Angel let it be about something good and positive, I thought as I picked up my phone, because I would get a breakdown right here right now otherwise. "Hey Maia, what's up?"
Jace's POV
Clary's door was open, and I silently peeked inside. She was lying on her bed, her head bungling of the side as she was talking to her phone upside down. I leant against the door stand, smiling as she was talking enthusiast about something, with Maia probably. I saw how she noticed me, and a warm smile lit up her face. "Maia, I got to go... But I promise I am going to make it work!" she said, after which she turned off her phone. "Make what work?" I asked curiously, but she just grinned and moved her eyebrows up and down. "Nothing" she said with a mischievous smile. "What? No come on Clary! You got to tell me!" She just laughed. "No... You are way too curious than is good for you, so I'm gonna... train you." She was now grinning so loud that she almost fell of her bed, which made her laugh even more.
Normally, I wouldn't be able to forget something like that. I would demand that they told me what was going on, just as long as needed, because I just couldn't get past it otherwise. But since I had met Clary, normally wasn't really... an option anymore. Everything was extreme with her... the bad moments and the good moments... And so I suddenly found myself in her arms, not caring about anything else than her. God, I was pretty sure she could do whatever she wanted with me, and I would even care...
Clary's POV
I laid on Jace stomach, listening to his calm breathing as he was playing with my hair. We weren't really doing anything, just listening to music and enjoying each others company. I had put my IPod on shuffle, and I heard how one of my favorite songs started. I leant on my elbows to look at Jake as I listened to the song, and I felt how my hart skipped a beat as he opened his eyes too. Without words we looked at each other, without blinking or losing attention, we were completely focused on each other and the music that was surrounding us.
Made a wrong turn
Once or twice
Dug my way out
Blood and fire
Bad decisions
That's alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss, no way it's all good
It didn't slow me down
Mistaken
Always second guessing
Underestimated
Look, I'm still around…
Pretty, pretty please
Don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than
less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing
You are perfect to me
You're so mean
When you talk
About yourself
You are wrong
Change the voices
In your head
Make them like you
Instead
So complicated
Look how big you'll make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It's enough
I've done all I can think of
Chased down all my demons
see you do the same
Pretty, pretty please
Don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than
less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing
You are perfect to me
The whole world stares while I swallow the fear
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in lying and we tried tried tried
But we try too hard, it's a waste of my time
Done looking for the critics, cuz they're everywhere
They don't like my genes, they don't get my hair
Strange ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that?
Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?
Ooh, pretty pretty pretty,
Pretty pretty please don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than
less than perfect
Pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel
Like you're nothing
you are perfect to me
You're perfect
You're perfect to me
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel
like you're less than, less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel
like you're nothing
you are perfect to me
Jace took my head in my hands, and on the last notes of the song, he kissed my lips and pulled me up closer. "Clary?" he said, his voice not more than a whisper. "You are perfect to me Clary, I hope you know that right?" he said passionately, sending shivers down my spine. "And you are my definition of perfection Jace" I answered emotionally. A smile lit up his serious gaze, and he kissed me again. "Clarissa, would you do me the honor of letting me paint you?"
Alec's POV
"I can't do it Magnus! They can't know! I can't... They will... Everybody would..." I stopped for a moment, trying to calm my thoughts so I could at least form an entire sentence. "They will hate me." I finally brought out, and I was startled by the ultimate desperation that was audible in my voice. "If they hate you for this they aren't worth you love Alec." Magnus said, his face serious and his eyes so bright and... old. Magnus was only a few years older than me (he didn't want to tell his age, of course!) but it seemed like he had been on earth for centuries. He knew so much of... of everything. I sometimes felt so childish and... unworldly.
"Don't let me choose between you and them, Magnus. Don't." Magnus stood up. "You know I wouldn't." he said firmly. "But this is ripping you apart Alec." I wanted to contradict that, but he interrupted me before I could speak a word. "Don't even think of saying you don't Alec. I can read you better than you can read yourself."
Wretched I fell down on one of the black glittering chairs in Magnus living room. "I don't know what to do Magnus..." I let my head rest in my hands. Magnus sat down in front of me, slowly peeling my hands of my face. "We'll work this out Alec... We're gonna find a way to work this out..."
Mystery male student's POV
Since that one day, I had become hooked on Clary Fray. She was mesmerizing in every way, and I couldn't stop staring at her. I was constantly searching her, but even if I found her, I wasn't satisfied. She didn't know me, didn't even notice me, and most of all, she wasn't mine. I knew this wasn't healthy, but I just couldn't stop myself from... obsessing. I wanted to be as close to her as possible, but popular and lovable as she was, she was almost always encircled by friends and acquaintances. Especially by that cocky, arrogant, self-absorbed Jace. God how I hated him!
OOOOKEEEY so what did you think about this new chapter? :D I really hope you liked it! I made it a bit longer than my last ones, because I updated so slowly :(
Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed/followed/favorited! Because of all that support, I am going to make a promise: I am gonna try to update once a week (probably somewhere in the weekend)! I hope this makes you a little bit happy :) I promise I will try! xoxo N.