Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of its characters as they are the property of Masashi Kishimoto. The author of the cover image is indy-riquez from DeviantArt. You can check the link for the original image in my profile.

Chapter 36: Letting Go

Kurotsuchi held her legs close to herself as she rested her head on her knees. She stared blankly at a crack in the wall. Despite the sadness that welled up inside of her she couldn't cry anymore, she felt as if her tears had all dried up by now.

She felt weak and filthy. She had barely eaten, slept, or showered for three days. She didn't care for her pitiful state, she deserved it. She wished she could just disappear. She couldn't do anything right; she had fallen in love with the worst person she could have chosen, disgracing herself, her village, and her family. No, it hadn't been enough that she failed her mission of capturing Naruto, but she just had to end up as Konoha's prisoner and got infatuated with her original target.

If only she hadn't failed her mission that time, if only she had been strong enough to get Naruto to Iwa and get the Kyuubi extracted none of this would be happening, she wouldn't be so miserable right now. ''But he would have died'' Said a voice in the back of her mind. So what if the moron had died!? She wouldn't have cared then as she wouldn't have known him, she wouldn't have been contaminated by his sweet words, noble behavior, or his bright smile that reflected nothing but selflessness.

She buried her face in her legs in frustration. She wished she had never met him. Her life would be so simple right now is she hadn't. She would be going out on the field, basking in glory and taking names, getting ready to become Tsuchikage and stand proud and tall when the day to inherit the hat came. But then Naruto came into her life and flipped it upside down and she had let him. She had actually started to feel comfortable here because of him. He made her think that she could have a life in this place; she even made friends and found love, or so she had thought. She had gone soft and all because of him.

But what could she do now? She couldn't stay here forever alternating between moping and throwing temper tantrums like she had done so for the past three days. As much as she wanted to just crawl into a ball and pretend she didn't exist she knew she had to decide her next course of action. She needed some fresh air to clear her head. In times of crisis was when one needed to try and keep a level head and consider their options. She almost laughed at the notion. Like she could keep a level head at the moment. But still, she had to try.

And with that, she stood up, her numb legs stumbling for a bit as she did. She didn't even bother to take a shower, she just took her pouch and put on her sandals before exiting her apartment with some trepidation.

As soon as she got out she glanced around warily for the ANBU. She wasn't sure if she was allowed to leave yet but seeing that the nearby ANBU overseeing her from the treetops didn't seem to make a move to stop her she guessed she was in the clear. Still, she could tell that they were watching her moves closely even more so than usual, most likely in case she went berserk again.

She didn't care though. She just wanted to take a walk and if no one bothered her she wouldn't bother anyone either.

Seeing that the ANBU weren't going to stop her, she proceeded to leave her apartment complex, walking down the stairs and going into the village with no particular destination in mind.

-a couple hours later-

Kurotsuchi had been walking aimlessly for a while now. She had opted in avoiding the busy streets as she wanted to be alone and decided to stick to the outer parts of the village as it was mostly forest. The green scenery and the fresh scent of nature was a bit relaxing thankfully, but it did little to help her turbulent mind.

She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn't notice someone else until she was too close. She halted immediately as soon as she noticed the other person, she diverted her gaze from to ground to look at Kakashi who was standing a few feet away with his back turned to her.

She felt ashamed of her lack of awareness as she had almost run into the copy ninja. But before she could go away and leave the man be, he turned around to acknowledge her presence.

''Kurotsuchi, good to see you up and well'' greeted the Sharingan user cordially.

''Hi'' Said Kurotsuchi drily. She wasn't in the mood to be talking to anyone right now, especially the Yondaime's prized student.

''I take that you are not here to pay respects?'' Asked Kakashi, seeing her state of disarray.

Kurotsuchi wondered what the man meant until she noticed the monument that was in front of Kakashi: a rather big flat dark stone in the shape of a Kunai's blade with names carved on the front. She recognized what it was, it was a memorial stone. Those were used to carve the names of Shinobi who had been killed on the field. Every village had them, Kurotsuchi herself had gone plenty of times to the one in her village to pay respect to her mother's memory.

''That's what you were doing?'' Asked Kurotsuchi. She hadn't expected to find the copy ninja brooding in here, he always seemed too easy going and relaxed.

''That's right. I come here often'' Said Kakashi before he returned his focus to the stone.

Kurotsuchi was intrigued, even if a little bit. To find the famous copy ninja grieving over someone, it made her feel compelled to ask him about it. ''Who are you here for?''

Kakashi took a deep breath before responding. ''Lots of people, but mostly my old teammates. They died on the last war''

Kurotsuchi frowned at that. So they died during the third great ninja war? Then that meant that...

Kakashi eyed the girl knowingly, already guessing what she was thinking. ''Don't stress over it. It was a long time ago''

Kurotsuchi tightened her fists at Kakashi's casual response. How could he be so nonchalant about it? ''Do you hate us?''

Kakashi looked at her curiously. ''Hmmm?''

''Do you hate us?!'' Kurotsuchi repeated a bit more heated. ''You must hate Iwa for taking away your precious teammates, right?''

Kakashi regarded her for a moment before he turned to the monument again. ''Not really''

Kurotsuchi gritted her teeth at that. ''Bullshit! You can't possibly forgive us so easily! If I was in your place I would hate you with a passion! Hell, I already hate all of you tree-huggers!''

''And what would hating you do for me exactly?'' Asked Kakashi serenely, seemingly not bothered at all by her outburst.

''For one thing, You could try and get revenge!'' Said Kurotsuchi. ''You must want that at the very least! We killed your friends for fucks sake!''

''Someone killed my friends'' corrected Kakashi. ''Not you or your kin. I won't condemn the entirety of Iwa for that. A Handful of your Shinobi did it. And even if I tracked those men down and killed them I would just be taking away loved ones from someone else senselessly''

''But they already took someone from you! It would be deserved!'' Said Kurotsuchi in anger.

''War puts people in a difficult position'' said Kakashi. ''You either kill or do nothing and let your friends get killed. We all had to make that choice at the time. I can't blame other ninjas for choosing to fight for their home''

Kurotsuchi gritted her teeth in impotence. She could not relate to Kakashi at all in this and she didn't understand how could he let go of his hatred so easily. But in a way, the way he talked about this matters reminded her a lot of what her dad used to say.

''In this world of ours nothing is ever so simple'' Said Kakashi. He could tell that she was troubled. He couldn't blame her. The girl was talented, extremely so even, but she was still young and her emotions were still fragile. She had yet to form a foundation for her character and she seemed to have most trouble than most due to her unique circumstances. ''If you let hatred dictate your life you will be consumed by it and you will find it impossible to end up happy. I failed to make Sasuke realize this, so I hope that at least you listen''

Kurotsuchi widened her eyes at that. Was she really acting like that asshole? She couldn't accept that she and Sasuke were alike in any way, shape, or form!

''You and he seem to be battling a lot of the same demons. I can only hope that you do it better than he did,'' Said Kakashi as he put a hand on her shoulder in support. ''Anyway, I'll be going now. It was good talking to you'' finished Kakashi as he started to walk away.

Kurotsuchi trembled in frustration. She hated being compared to the Uchiha bastard. She turned to the retreating form of Kakashi with her anger on full display. ''I'm not you! I can't simply stop feeling all this hatred just because you say so!''

''You are the one who has to find your own reasons and decide if you can or can't. No one else will be able to do it for you,'' Said Kakashi without turning around as he made his way into the village. ''I'll be seeing you around''

Kurotsuchi could kind of understand what Kakashi was getting at but she was still enraged. She was not so forgiving. Her mother had died in the war, and a lot of older relatives that she never even had the chance to meet perished too just because Konoha and the Yellow Flash killed them. She could not forget just like that, and even if she did her village hated Konoha, she would not give her back to Iwa. She would be betraying the memory of everyone that died if she let that offense go.

Seeing that there was no point in remaining here, she left the area too, giving one last lingering glance at the memorial stone before going away.

After that, it had been a few minutes of waking and she still couldn't forget the words of the Sharingan user. What If she really ended up consumed by her hatred? Was she so similar to Sasuke in that way? She didn't want to entertain the thought. She wasn't like him! There was no way she had anything in common with that bastard.

She walked down the forest path for a few minutes until she found a river down a small hill.

She thought it was a nice spot to rest and sort her thoughts since the copy ninja left her a lot to think about.

As she approached the river the pleasant smell of humid soil eased her mind as she sat down on the small hill, resting her head on one knee as she contemplated the sun rays gently reflecting on the crystalline water.

However, while she meditated she didn't see Sai and Ino watching her from behind one of the nearby trees.

''Finally, it has been days since she last let herself be seen'' muttered Ino as she stared intently at the Iwa Kunoichi.

''I heard she had been hiding in her apartment'' added Sai.

''And if we let her go back to her place without doing anything who knows when she'll come back out'' said Ino.

''Ino-San are you sure about this? Don't you think we could make this situation worse?'' Said Sai.

''I don't think we can worsen the situation even if we tried,'' Said Ino with guilt. They had been partly responsible for that mess with Naruto the other day. They had destroyed so much progress in Kurotsuchi and Naruto's relationship with their carelessness. As soon as she got wind of what had happened she had Sai go and ask Yugao what the deal with Kurotsuchi was and now everything made sense. ''We at least have to try to fix this''

''It doesn't matter that she is the next Tsuchikage and Naruto is the son of the Yondaime?'' Inquired Sai. When they had started playing matchmaker with Naruto and Kurotsuchi they hadn't know that he was the son of the Yondaime and that it made it delicate for the Tsuchikage's granddaughter to be with him, but that didn't seem to make Ino back down.

''That's even more of a reason for us to do something,'' Said Ino, causing Sai to raise an eyebrow in confusion. ''Think about it, if she really becomes the next Tsuchikage whats better for us: that she hates Naruto or that she loves him?''

Sai took a minute to think about it. That actually made sense. He couldn't find a rebuttal for that.

''Exactly,'' said Ino when she noticed that Sai understood her point of view. ''Now let's do something before she goes away''

And so, Ino and Sai left the cover of the tree and approached Kurotsuchi.

Said Iwa Kunoichi sensed them coming and just spared them a quick glance before returning her attention to the river.

Ino ignored her rude attitude and leaned towards the moody girl.

''Do you mind if we sit down?'' Ino asked in a friendly manner.

Kurotsuchi shrugged uncaringly. ''It's your village, do whatever the hell you want''

Even if the reception wasn't the most welcoming, Ino sat down beside Kurotsuchi along with Sai.

Kurotsuchi glanced at them suspiciously. She knew that they had to be up to something.

''Goodness, she looks terrible. It's even worse in close proximity'' thought Ino silently as she regarded Kurotsuchi's current appearance. She had dark bags under her reddened eyes, which looked even redder with her natural pink eyes; her hair was was messy with a few wild strands sticking out at random parts of her head, and her clothes were rugged and didn't look fresh. All in all, it looked like she hadn't taken proper care of herself in days.

''What a beautiful day, isn't it?'' Said Ino lamely in an effort to break the ice.

Kurotsuchi responded with a disinterested huff.

Ino could have facepalmed at her opening. That was the best she could come up with? She was almost as bad as Sai-Kun. She had to get her act together, she was a Yamanaka, Konoha's best mind specialists. That also made them the best psychologists too, and this was Ino's chance to put it into practice.

''You left us so suddenly at the library the other day,'' Said Ino. ''Why was that?''

''Cut the crap, Yamanaka,'' Said Kurotsuchi in impatience. ''You already know what happened. You wouldn't be here if you didn't, so stop playing dumb''

Ino gave a sigh of exasperation. ''Fine, I'll just cut to the chase. The way you acted, that wasn't fair to Naruto at all''

''I don't want to be given a lecture by you'' Replied Kurotsuchi.

''Stop acting like an overgrown kid, then. These temper tantrums are ridiculous '' Said Ino, earning a glare from the prodigy which caused the mind reader to shudder at the intensity.

''You have no right to be talking about things you don't understand!'' Barked Kurotsuchi, finally her anger getting the best of her and making Ino recoil at her rage.

''You want to tell me that I'm being unreasonable, that my actions are a tantrum?! You who probably never had anyone close to you die and had to face the people responsible!?'' Yelled Kurotsuchi, making Ino cower and Sai frown in displeasure at the girl's rudeness. ''Not only that but you've never had the pressure of behaving properly in the face of an entire village and you never will!''

''H-How mean!'' Said Ino offended. ''Just because I haven't gone through what you have doesn't mean I can't offer some insight''

''Like hell you can!'' Kurotsuchi sneered. ''You are just a pampered little girl who hasn't had to face a single hardship in her life!''

''Ino-San is just trying to help'' Said Sai at last, with an angry frown of his own, surprising both girls. He was usually very composed but he couldn't keep listening silently as Kurotsuchi badmouthed both Ino and Naruto.

''I didn't ask for your opinion, faggot!'' snarled Kurotsuchi as she directed her focus to Sai.

''I don't care'' Said Sai defiantly, surprising Kurotsuchi even further. ''Ino-San and Naruto are your friends, that is no way of treating them. Especially Naruto who has done nothing but support you and cherish you''

Kurotsuchi was quick to recover her wit, baring her teeth in rage at Sai's insolence. ''That is none of your concern! How can you expect that guy to be my friend when his shit of a father killed my mother?!''

''Naruto is not his dad'' Sai shot back. ''You are not the only one who has suffered because of the fourth. Naruto has had to endure more than you have when his own father made him carry the burden of being the Kyuubi's Jinchuuriki. He is probably the person who can understand your pain the most and you are willing to throw away his friendship for the actions of a dead man''

Kurotsuchi didn't know how to respond to that. She couldn't think of an argument against Sai's logic.

''I may not know much about being happy,'' Continued Sai. ''But even I could tell you were happy with him and nothing but yourself is keeping you from that''

Kurotsuchi frowned. It wasn't that easy. ''You don't get it, do you? I'm not allowed to be happy with him. My village-''

''Your village shouldn't dictate those things. You are going to be Tsuchikage, right?'' Said Sai, causing Kurotsuchi to widen her eyes. ''If you are going to be a leader learn to lead, to think for yourself. Instead of letting other people decide what you should do, you have to do what you know is right despite what others think, that's what a proper leader would do''

Kurotsuchi found herself at a lose of words once again. She had never thought of it that way.

''You are so concerned about upholding your village's hatred for Konoha that you are willing to sacrifice your own happiness, and for nothing!'' By the time Sai finished he found himself out of breath, he hadn't meant to shout like that, he typically didn't lose his cool, he had been trained better than that. And he knew he had surprised the girls as he could feel the piercing gazes of amazement from both of them which made him feel self-conscious of his tirade. ''Excuse me'' And with that, Sai stood up and retreated into the village.

Ino stared agape at the retreating Sai a moment longer before she forcibly shook off her shock. ''Y-Yeah, what he...said'' Said Ino to Kurotsuchi before giving her an awkward wave of goodbye and followed Sai.

Once left alone, Kurotsuchi pondered on what the ROOT member had just said, surprised not only for his uncharacteristic ramblings but also because of how much of what he had said was true. She didn't just hate Konoha because the Yellow Flash killed her mother, she also hated It because that's what they were supposed to do. In Iwa it was almost an unspoken rule that you had to hate Konoha, that's just how things were supposed to be. It made it feel like you weren't a true Iwa citizen unless you despised Konoha with a passion. And she had always strived to be a model citizen, as a Tsuchikage prospect she had to be the perfect Iwa Shinobi. She had never considered that maybe she didn't have to hate Konoha, not without feeling like a traitor to Iwa's cause.

If she really was completely honest with herself, Konoha's people weren't so different from her home. They weren't the heartless pricks they had been brought up to believe they were. Was hating them just because really justified? She had met a lot of people in here, people that had tried to be her comrade and be there for her. Had they been from Iwa she wouldn't give it a second thought to call them wonderful friends of hers. Could she really choose not to despise Konoha? Could she even reverse years of conditioning to do so?

Then there was the issue with Naruto. The pale idiot was right, she had indeed been happy with Naruto, happier than she had ever remembered being. Just having Naruto by her side made everything better. While she had been with him she had forgotten that she was a prisoner, not only that but she hadn't even minded as she barely even felt like one. His bright and good-natured aura that surrounded him even made her forget her hatred for Konoha. She almost wished she had never found out he was the Yondaime's son. But that was a fact that she could not change. He was the child, the flesh and blood of her mother's murderer. She could wish all she wanted but that reality was never going to change.

However, Naruto himself wasn't like the Yondaime. The only way he could be more distant from the man is if he wasn't his child. Naruto never even knew his father, he wasn't raised by him and he more than likely didn't act like him. And it was true that he had been screwed by the Yondaime even worse than she had. Due to the Kyuubi he never even had anyone growing up, she at least had had her grandpa, her dad, and even Akatsuchi. Naruto had been all alone and everything because of his own father.

When she looked at it like that she felt guilty. Guilt at having taken years of hatred out on Naruto. He was innocent. He had never done anything to her. He was the most selfless and righteous person she knew. But even still...every time she thought of the Yellow Flash, or her mother, she could feel her unyielding hatred starting to overtake her. She just couldn't forget, not like that.

She took out a scroll and in a puff of smoke she summoned her sword. She held the weapon firmly by the scabbard as she examined it with sad eyes. Not only was this her mother's blade, but also the sword that Naruto had fixed for her. It wasn't just a memento of her dead mother anymore but also a token of her friendship with Naruto.

Looking at it reminded her of all the good times she had had with the blond; all the times she laughed at the antics he did to lift her mood, the times he had been there to comfort her through hard times, the times they showed how much they meant to the other and how good she felt with him beside her, and even the times they simply enjoyed each other's presence in comfortable silence. She tightened her grip on the sword as a teardrop hit the weapon. She didn't want to lose all those memories. She was so tired of all of this. She just wanted to feel happy again like she had done so just days before.

Kakashi was right, Sai was right; All these negative emotions, they were an anchor, an anchor that kept her from feeling true joy. It was time to do what her heart told her was right and not what she had been conditioned to think was right. From now on she was the one who was going to decide what it was right or wrong for her to feel. She knew that it wasn't going to happen overnight and that her resentment towards Konoha wasn't going to be easy to forget, but she was going to try and see them for what they truly were and not what the bitter elders from Iwa wanted her to believe. And as for Naruto, she would never be able to change who his dad was but she would treat him as his own person, not the son of the Yellow Flash or anyone else, but the kind young man that she had chosen to give her heart to.

She closed her eyes, feeling as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She wasn't going to be a slave to hatred. She was better than that, she knew she could be better than that. She wasn't going to let the stupid Yondaime ruin her own happiness, she was going to carve her own path and destiny. She just wished that Naruto lent her his support in this ordeal like he had done it countless times in the past, but most importantly she prayed that he could forgive her for all she had done.

She stood up, having found her resolve. She didn't feel as if the path before her was shrouded in doubt anymore. Now everything was clear to her. And she wasn't going to back down from this, just like Naruto never gave up she wasn't going to either. They were both going to become Kage and she needed to be up to par.

But now, she had to return to her place and get some proper rest and something to eat. Not to mention a shower. She also had to either buy new furniture or fix the ones she broke. Anyway, she was going to be busy while Naruto came back.

She started to make her way into the village again with a much clearer mind, when suddenly she heard a loud booming noise at the distance coupled with the terrified screams from a crowd of people.

Kurotsuchi stared at the village in alarm, where she could see smoke rising from a building far away in the distance. Soon another booming sound was heard and the top of a tall building exploded, accompanied by even more frantic screams. ''What the hell is happening!?'' Asked Kurotsuchi out loud as she stared at a dust of cloud starting to cover a part of Konoha due to the falling debris.

She made a run for the village and as she did she could see several of the ANBU usually guarding her going on ahead to check on the issue. That was further proof that what was happening had to be something serious if the ANBU had given priority to it than to her.

As she got closer, the screams of the people got louder and she started spotting corpses littered through ruined streets and buildings.

Kurotsuchi had a sinking feeling in her stomach. She had a guess on who could be bold enough to attack Konoha as they had done it before to her own village.

Then, as she doubled a corner, her fears were confirmed as she found a Konoha Chunin on his knees while a tall orange-haired man pulled some kind of clear substance from the man's head. The Chunin fell to the ground, dead as Kurotsuchi stared in anger and shock at the enemy before her.

He was wearing a black robe with red clouds, had a slashed Amegakure headband on his forehead, had black piercings in his nose and cheeks, but his most striking feature were his purple eyes with a ripple pattern that stared coldly at her with a stoic face.

Kurotsuchi remembered those eyes, she had seen them once before back in that cave when they faced Deidara.

''Akatsuki'' sneered Kurotsuchi as she got into a battle stance.

The man seemed to tense himself too for the encounter before he narrowed his purple eyes at her in recognition. ''You...''

Kurotsuchi didn't give the man the chance to finish before she rushed at him, sword at the ready to slice him in half. ''This is payback! For me, for Iwa, and for Naruto!''

Author's notes:

Surprise! Fast update! You guys didn't expect me to leave you too long in that last cliffhanger, did you? I'm not that evil...

Wow, that last chapter had some polarizing opinions it seems. Cmon guys, I have been building that confrontation since forever. Obviously the drama wasn't quite over yet.

And for those that think that Kurotsuchi changed her mind too easily; the point was that she was already struggling with her conflicted feelings. Deep down she was already getting over her hatred but she felt as if she had to hold on to it. Normally I don't explain these kinds of things in the authors' note but I wanted to make it clear just in case I didn't do a good enough job explaining within the context of the story.

Also, I was under the impression that Minato and Kushina's relationship wasn't a public secret only her pregnancy was to keep the population from worrying about her weakening seal. But I could be wrong on that.

Anyway, this has been a long enough note. I'm excited I had already planned all of this since the day I started writing the story and it seems like such a long wait. It's very satisfying to finally get to this point.

See you guys next time! Please tell me your thoughts in a review or a PM.