An: Please review and let me know if I'm doing a good job. I want to keep thos going but I wanna know what people think.

I turn to Rue's family. "I feel as if I did know Rue, and she'll always be with me. Everything beautiful brings her to mind. I see her in the yellow flowers that grow in the Meadow by my house.

I see her in the mockingjays that sing in the trees. But most of all, I see her in my sister, Prim."

My voice is undependable, but I am almost finished. "Thank you for your children." I raise my chin to address the crowd. "And thank you all for the bread."

I stand there, feeling broken and small, thousands of eyes trained on me. There's a long pause. Then, from somewhere in the crowd, someone whistles Rue's four note mockingjay tune. The one that signaled the end of the workday in the orchards. The one that meant safety in the arena.

By the end of the tune, I have found the whistler, a wizened old man in a faded red shirt and overalls. His eyes meet mine.

What happens next is not an accident. It is too well executed to be spontaneous, because it happens in complete unison. Every person in the crowd presses the three middle fingers of their left hand against their lips and extends them to me. It's our sign from District 12, the last good bye we gave Rue in the arena.

The full impact of what I've done hits me. It was not intentional, I only meant to express my thanks, but I have elicited something dangerous. An act of dissent from the people of District 11. This is exactly the kind of thing I am supposed to be defusing!

Peeta and I acknowledge a final round of applause. He leads me back toward the doors, I feel funny and have to stop for a moment as little bits of bright sunshine dance before my eyes.

"Are you all right Katniss?" His arm wraps around my waist for support and I cling to him. "The sun was so bright. I forgot my flowers." I mumble.

We would be safe inside the Justice Building by now, if I hadn't stopped, if I hadn't left my flowers. Instead, from the deep shade of the veranda, we see the whole thing.

A pair of Peacekeepers dragging the old man who whistled to the top of the steps. Forcing him to his knees before the crowd and putting a bullet through his head.

The Peacekeepers lead us back inside and I keep my head in Peeta's chest and his arm stay locked around my waist.

Haymitch, Effie, Portia, and Cinna wait under a static filled screen that's mounted on the wall, their faces tight with anxiety. I free myself from Peeta's arm and shock everyone when I launch into Haymitch's. He wraps his around me and I just hold on to him.

"What happened?" Effie hurries over. "We lost the feed just after Katniss's beautiful speech, and then Haymitch said he thought he heard a gun fire, and I said it was ridiculous, but who knows? There are lunatics everywhere!"

"Nothing happened, Effie. An old truck backfired," says Peeta evenly. Two more shots. The door doesn't muffle their sound much. Who was that? Thresh's grandmother? One of Rue's little sisters?

I stay in Haymitch's arms, he rubs my back and I relax. "It's ok sweetheart." For the first time that name doesn't sound like an insult. He holds me at arms length and mouths 'what happened.'

He signals to Peeta who joins us and Haymitch rips the microphones off us and stuffs them under a couch cushion. "Let's take a walk."

I believe that the only other time he's been there was during his own tour so I am amazed when he starts leading us through rooms and passage ways until we come to a doomed room that hasn't been used in ages.

"So they cut the feed after Katniss' speech?" Peeta asks and Haymitch confirms with a shake of his head. "There was an old man in the crowd, he did their call that signals the end of the day. After that everyone did District 12's salute and then..."

Peeta's voice is filling with and an anger I've never heard from him. "They shot him...the old man. They dragged him to the front and shot him." Peeta picks up a vase and throws it across the room, it shatters with the force of his throw.

"It's all my fault. I did this." Because it's true I did do this, it was my job to calm the Districts and I fail in the first one.

"No Katniss..." The tone of his voice hits me like a slap in the face and I flinch as though I was hit. "I did this...I should never have made that offer. Do you think they'll get part of our winnings or did I just sentenced them to death? Cause they'll be lucky if they survive the day." He picks up something else, a statue this time, and throws it and again I watch it turn to dust. This scares me more and I duck my head into Haymitch's chest.

I feel the sobs hit me and I whimper, "Peeta stop." Haymitch comforts me and once my sobbing stops he looks at Peeta. "Look boy you can be mad all you want but that's no reason to take it out on her. She's not the one your mad at."

I feel Peeta's touch on my arm and for a second I flinch away. "Katniss..." His voice is just a whisper and I turn from Haymitch's tear stained shirt to look at him. He hold out his hands and I take them as he pulls me to my feet and into his arms.

He pulls my head to the crook of his neck, one arm wraps around my waist, the other glides over the skin of my face. "I'm sorry Katniss, I didn't mean to scare you. You know I'd never hurt you, I'd die before that happens. I love you Mrs. Mellark."

He kisses me and I can taste the salt mixed in with the taste of his skin, his arms wrap around my waist as mine find their way to his hair. I break the kiss and mouth Haymitch's name against his lips. This gets Peeta to snicker and I relax.

"Now that you two are done making out, we need to come up with a plan." I roll my eyes and shake my head. "What if we did a public proposal during the interview with Caesar?" They both look at me for two different reasons.

"Katniss we're already married." Peeta says and I smile a bit.

"Not by the Capitol's standards. That might be enough to calm them down, give the Districts something else to focus on." Haymitch says and I can see him trying to plot it out.

"Snow already knows about the ring, I told him to was a gift from you. So we just need to convince everyone else that we plan to get married too." I take Peeta's left hand in mine and twirl the ring around his finger. "We are married in the only way that means anything to me. You opened my eyes to the idea that it could be good. I just want this Tour to be over so we can go home and live our lives. As long as you're safe and we're together, I don't care what moment the Capitol's cameras steal from us."

I kiss him and we head down to what becomes an indistinguishable series of car rides, crowds, dinners, and train rides. Each day it's the same. Wake up. Get dressed. Ride through cheering crowds. Listen to a speech in our honor. Give a thank you speech in return, but only the one the Capitol gave us, never any personal additions now.

Sometimes a brief tour: a glimpse of the sea in one district, towering forests in another, ugly factories, fields of wheat, stinking refineries. Dress in evening clothes. Attend dinner. Train. During ceremonies, we are solemn and respectful but always linked together, by our hands, our arms.

At dinners, we are both borderline delirious in our love for each other, something that makes both of us ill because this is not who we are and this is not our real love. We kiss, we dance, we get caught trying to sneak away to be alone.

On the train, we are quietly miserable as we try to assess what effect we might be having. We are never apart always next to each other. Peeta hold me in his arms and after our visit to District 8 I begin to stop eating much in private. Peeta begins to beg and pled and we start to take our meals in private so he can force me to eat.

Cinna is forced to take my clothes in and my prep team frets over the circles under my eyes and the sickly tone of my skin. Effie offers me different colored pills. I refuse most but try the sleeping pills but they only seem to make the nightmares worse.

If I sleep at all it has to be in Peeta's arm at night, and sometimes Haymitch's during the day. Effie pulls me aside one day and tells me that the staff has started to talk about the noise level of our sleep car at night. I promise her we will try to keep it down but secretly I hope that the news gets back to President Snow.

Peeta makes love to me every night, some nights it's five or six times at all hours and I have stopped caring about being discreet.

I lay there our limbs tangled together, my head in the crook of his neck, fingers tracing patterns on his chest. He kisses the crown of my head and his arms stay tightly around me.

"I hate his Peeta. I hate the fact that I need this."

I hear him laugh into my hair.

"Do you hate the sex Katniss? Am I starting to get worse?"

"No you're always amazing, so passionate and every touch just makes me want more...it always has. What I hate is me, I feel like I'm using it to keep myself calm or to drive away the nightmares. I love you but I miss being home, I miss how we are there. I can touch you, kiss you, make love and not think about anything but you."

He lifts my chin with his fingers and I am forced to look into those stunning blue eyes, so filled with love for me that it hurts. "I love you Katniss. My strong, beautiful, stubborn, willfull Katniss Everdeen...who gave me such an amazing gift when she become Katniss Mellark, my wife and someday the mother of my children. You know I'll give you whatever it takes to make you happy, even if that means making love to you all day."

He smiles and I can't help but return it. Peeta, always selfless in his love for me...refusing to see the bad things. Believeing that our love is strong enough to make it through anything and a part of me knows that it is.

I press my lips to his in a gentle kiss. I keep the kiss light, savoring the taste of his skin under my lips. I move from his lips across his jaw line and up his cheek to his ear. "I love you Peeta but I have been selfish and now I want to make it up to you."

I kiss down his neck, across his shoulder and over his collarbone. I dart my tongue out and swirl it around his nipple. "Katniss. You know how much..." I cut off his words by wrapping my lips around it and alternating between sucking and nipping at the nub of flesh. His hips buck and I wrap my fingers around his rapidly hardening erection as my lips continue to tease his nipples.

I hear a string of obscenities come from his lips and I'm sure that these are what horrify Effie the most. When he's fully hard I release him and he groans until I start to kiss my way down his torso, I let my tongue trace the lines of his abs and this earns me a series of moans.

I wrap my fingers around this base and give him a light squeeze. I swirl my tongue around tip a few time before I press my tongue into his slit and start pumping his harder.

I slide him into my mouth and inch by inch work him until I can feel his at the back of my throat. "God damnit Katniss." I suck my cheeks in and I can tell how hard he's fighting not to buck into my mouth instead he grabs the sheets and fists them in his hands.

I set a pace that causes the string of obscenities mixed with my name to flow from his lips. I feel him reaching the point of release so I take him in and hollow out my cheeks, he fists him hands into my hair as he releases into my mouth. "Fuck...I love...you...Katniss."

I clean him out before he pulls me up by the hair and crushes my mouth to his. He kisses me and I feel my lips starting to bruise as his tongue thrust into my mouth and I feel him pull me on top of him. "Do you ever get enough Peeta? I was worried about me but you're almost as bad."

He give me a smile that make me wet, his usual sweetness taken over by a wicked smirk and the midnight blue outline has taken over his eyes. I feel him push him into me and I feel that he's mostly hard. "Katniss I will never get tired of holding you like this, feeling your warmth wrapped around me, the sounds that you make. The way you say my name. Every time proves to me that you love me because your body never lies."

I'm tired of lies, we're both tired of them, but it seems with each other there is only truth and trust in our unspoken words and in the movement of our hearts and souls. Soon we will be in the Capitol and we will have to face the interview that will seal our fates.