Edward POV (1 Month later)
It's been a month of fun, long nights, and love and guess whose expecting? No not Bella but Alice is, but not one but two yup Alice is having her a set of twins, Bella laughed her ass of when she found out, and I mean laugh because Alice swore she wasn't going to have any more kids any time soon, plus Alice laughed her ass off when she found out Bella was having triplets so I believe payback was in order. Bella talked to her manager and publicist last week on magazines wanting to have a little family photo-shoot with us so they choose People Magazine 15 million dollars, yeah I know.
"Wow" I laughed turning to Bella as the door closed behind Jake after they were sure the magazine place was outside the gate
"Yeah" Bella nodded picking up Vaughn who was gurgling in his suit
"I think you're ready take this off" Bella smiled
"I think Cason might figure out how to burn these clothes with his eyes before we make it up stairs" I smirked picking him up with Bryce
"I swore he was going to be shooting flames after they woke him up so many times" Bella laughed walking into their room
"I could see the headlines now flame throwing baby" I laughed
"That'd be a new one" she chuckled stripping Vaughn's clothes off,
"There you go handsome" she smiled, she sat him in his diaper and under shirt in his crib while undressing Bryce and heading for the bathtub
"Scrub a dub in the tub" I smirked picking up Vaughn who was enjoying his big toe and heading into their bathroom, Bella already had the bathtub recliners in the tub so I laid them in their own recliner before sitting next to Bella and putting on their playlist, playing the pina colada song, Bella laughed shaking her head as I shook my head in their face and sprinkled the water on Vaughn's stomach, and then the Peanut butter Jelly time and the kicking started Bella laughed so hard her face was red and she had tears coming down her face,
"They understand real music" I smirked handing Bryce a floater baseball bat
"Wait this song" Bella laughed and that Samba song on The Mask came on
"Dance with me mommy" I laughed pulling Bella to me
"You like don't you" Bella laughed
"I think I know what we're going to watch today" I smiled carrying Vaughn and Bryce into their room
"Son of the Mask" I sang
"Don't give them idea's they might try to reenact" she smirked
"Don't worry we have originals right here" I smiled picking Bryce up
"Original masterminds" she smiled
"We're innovators aren't we" I smiled heading back downstairs, all three were loaded into their rockers while Bella took a shower and we watched ESPN, they haven't really been out since their 2 week old checkup and their 6 week checkup 2 days ago, I'm heading back to work starting tomorrow and I'm not off until November so we can head to New York so Bella can be there for her fashion show, plus we're taking the boys, 3 more months
"My turn" I smiled bouncing back off
"You look like a cross between Alice and Em when you do that" Bella smirked, well f that didn't stop me
"That's messed up Bella and you know it" I glared
"Truth hurts Edward" she smiled
"You're going to pay tonight" I whispered in her ear
"Counting on it" she purred, I groaned smacking her on the butt and running up the steps, cold shower
Bella POV
"Don't you ever do that" I said wagging my finger at Vaughn who was gurgling and staring
"Not until you have a wife at least, isn't that right Cason" I smiled, "And then you can ask your daddy all the questions" my phone began ringing, awe the pixie eating for three
"Hello Prego" I smiled propping my phone up on my shoulder while I took Cason out his rocker
"I swear to God you and Em are the same"
"Did you call to complain Prego?" I smiled, I knew it was pissing her off but she's funny as ell
"Not funny Bella"
"Sorry Pre-I mean Alice"
"You done?"
"Yes"
"Just giving you a heads up that Renee is coming over tomorrow to assist"
"Why?"
"Because Edward won't be there"
"Okay but how do you know that?"
"I heard it through the grape vine"
"As in Renee told Esme and you gave Esme a little glass of wine and she spilled"
"That too"
"Well Alice thanks, I owe you one"
"Yeah well I'll hold that to you"
"I wouldn't put it pass you"
"That's why I love you"
"I know"
"Bye Bella"
"Bye Prego" I laughed hanging up the phone
"Guess who's coming tomorrow to assist?"
"Who?" Edward asked burying his face into Bryce's stomach
"The great filter less Renee"
"How did you find that out?"
"The grape vine"
"You mean Alice who got it form a liquored up Esme who was told by Renee?"
"Exactly"
"Do you know how many things came out when Renee and my mom got together over a bottle of wine?"
"More than what we should've known"
"I think when you end up in sex-ed and it sounds like a repetition of a random night when you were at home then you know something's up"
"Remember when Esme and Renee showed us how to put a condom on a beer bottle?"
"You're dad launched it across the room when he felt it"
"Funny as hell"
"Yeah good luck" Edward laughed standing up
"Why would you bring that up that's not okay Edward that's really not okay" I glared fixing Cason in my arms
"You're right I'll make it up to you" he winked, grabbing Bryce and Vaughn and leading the way upstairs, by the time Vaughn was half changed he woke up and the others just had to join the party, and that's why two hours later Edward and I practically flew across the hall to our room
Edward POV
I think they got it mixed up, I hope they don't think they're supposed to make their mom a nun it's already too late, it's Jamie and any other female that's going to be born not their mother, I refused to be a married man and have to take cold showers its blasphemy, I'm going to have a little sit down with them later because this is not okay man not at all.
I woke up the next morning, and climbing out of bed to take a shower and getting dressed,
"Bye baby" I smiled kissing Bella
"Bye" she mumbled kissing me back and snuggling back into the bed, I chuckled heading across the hall to the boy's room, Vaughn was awake looking around
"Shhhh Mommy is sleeping, okay" I whispered putting his pacifier in his mouth,
"You and your brothers do me a favor and don't give your mom such a hard time, Nana Renee's coming" I smiled evilly
"Oh yeah that's right and she's going to scar you for life and I'm going to laugh, uh huh payback for being a cock block" I laughed kissing his head before heading out, I met Nathan by his house as I drove to work, I know it's probably mean to laugh at my sons and their very first full day of Renee, ha it makes me laugh just thinking about it,
"What are you laughing about?" Nathan smirked
"Renee's coming over to spend the day"
"How'd you find that out?"
"The grapevine"
"You mean from, Bella who heard, it from Alice, who got it out a liquored Esme who was told by Renee?"
"Yes"
Bella POV
I woke up around 10 to the sound of horrible sounds coming from the baby monitor,
"Mom what a surprise" I smiled standing by the door
"I know I wanted to surprise you, and spend the day with my daughter"
"And surprise me you did"
"Don't worry you go work out and shower"
"Thanks mom"
"Don't worry it'll be like I'm not even here" she called
"Next thing you're going to tell me is that Em is no longer stupid" I scoffed heading downstairs to the gym, by the time I was done and made my way to the kitchen I had to laugh this will be one of those times when my mom has one of her genius ideas,
"Mom what are you doing?" I laughed walking into the kitchen; she had Vaughn, Cason, and Bryce all dressed up in a Nana Renee t-shirt without their diapers snapping pictures
"Sweetie it's blasphemy to not any embarrassing photos"
"Well put on their diapers that's very unsanitary"
"Sweetie I've eaten slobbered up pieces of hamburger buns from you"
"Ewe mom that's disgusting I didn't need to know that" I yelled
"Oh don't be modest"
"I didn't even know that was in your vocabulary"
"Funny did you have your coffee?"
"No"
"Have your coffee" she smiled pointing to the coffee machine
"Mom put a diaper on their butts, I don't want them trying to streak in the house when they can walk"
"It'd be cute and it'll work for your embarrassing ammo"
"As appealing as that sounds I don't want to see three naked butts running around the house"
"Fine but one day you'll regret it"
"And that day will come to soon" I sighed taking a sip of coffee
Edward POV
When I finally had lunch, I called Bella I have to hear this,
"Hello Edward" she's annoyed now would be smart not to ask her how her day is going but alas I am related to Emmett
"Hi Love, how is your day?"
"Great, guess who came over to surprise me?"
"Who?"
"My mother"
"Really?"
"Yeah you want to speak to her?"
"No"
"Yes okay here" there was movement
"Edward" Renee said coming on the phone; oh she's going to pay
"Hi Renee, how's your day been?"
"Wonderful, these boys got their daddies pokey but that's a Swan temper" what do you say to that, it's not in any book I've ever read, I could hear Bella's laughter in the back she's so going to pay
"Oh Edward don't be modest you forget I'm your mother best friend I've cleaned you up a few times"
"Thanks Renee"
"No problem Edward, but I've got to go speak to your wife you're cutting into my time with my grand babies" more scuffling
"Hey baby" Bella answered innocently, innocent my ASS
"Hi that was a very interesting conversation between your mother and I"
"Oh I heard"
"Well I'll see you when I get home from work, we have something's to talk about" I know we're not going to be talking because our mouths will be busy doing something else but hey let the chips fall where they may and I won't complain
"I look forward to it, bye and I love you"
"I love you too" I chuckled hanging up the phone, that just wasn't right no man should ever have to hear their mother's best friend and wife's mother practically tell you that you had a big dick, I wonder what the side effects would be of me pouring Clorox Bleach in my ear to sterilize my brain, but then again what's the point they'll just make it worse by the time I wake up the next morning.
"Dad" I said walking into Carlisle's office
"Yes son?"
"What are the possible side effects of pouring Clorox Bleach into your ear?
"Do I even want to know?"
"No but I'm afraid"
"You mean you talked to Renee"
"Yes"
"Ask Charlie or Phil they're the experts"
"I think Phil might tell me to beat my brains out with a bat, and Charlie might tell me to shoot myself in the foot to take my mind of what she said"
"Only Renee" Carlisle laughed
"Carlisle Audrey and Keith Hall are here"
"Thank you Emma" Carlisle nodded standing up and throwing his coat on and stethoscope and heading out
"And Edward"
"Yeah dad"
"Good luck with that" he laughed walking off
"Not cool dad, not cool" I yelled as he walked off laughing
Bella POV
The phone rang while Renee sang or screeched which ever fits and I'd choose the latter, Edward asshole he's calling to rub it in,
"Hello Edward" I smiled slightly aggravated
"Hi Love, how is your day?" he said a little too sherry asshole
"Great, guess who came over to surprise me?"
"Who?"
"My mother"
"Really?" oh you want to play that card I've got something for you and I bet someone won't like
"Yeah you want to speak to her?"
"No" oh yes you do and you will
"Yes okay here" I smiled handing the phone over to Renee
"Edward" Renee said coming on the phone; what I wouldn't give to see his face right now (pause) "Wonderful, these boys got their daddies pokey but that's a Swan temper" I chocked on my air before laughing leave it to my mom to bring that up
"Oh Edward don't be modest you forget I'm your mother best friend I've cleaned you up a few times" (pause) "No problem Edward, but I've got to go speak to your wife you're cutting into my time with my grand babies" she smiled handing back the phone oh my mom you've got to love her
"Hey baby" I answered innocently
"Hi that was a very interesting conversation between your mother and I"
"Oh I heard"
"Well I'll see you when I get home from work, we have something's to talk about" I know we're not going to be talking because our mouths will be busy doing something else but hey let the chips fall where they may and I won't complain
"I look forward to it, bye and I love you"
"I love you too" he chuckled hanging up the phone, I turned to face my screeching I mean singing mother shaking my head, eventually I'll realize that this isn't so bad…that'll never happen
"I think my singing is very soothing look at them they're fast asleep" Renee smiled triumphantly
"No mom, I think they just went to sleep to escape your singing" I smiled
"You know from you I expect no less" she smiled opening her arms, I smiled climbing into her lap and relaxing
"You loved my singing" Renee said after a few moments of silence I put emphasis on the few
"No I went to sleep to escape your singing my baby boys are smart"
"It doesn't matter, it was effective wasn't it?"
"That it was" I laughed
Edward POV
"Bye dad" I said leaning through his doorway,
"I'm heading out now too, come on" he said grabbing his suit jacket and loosening his tie,
"Nathan come on" I called laughing as he fell when he got out the chair,
"Hey Edward I can't feel my left ass cheek"
"The poke the right one" I smirked
"That's not funny" he glared getting up and shaking his leg, before making his way over
"I told you that you could sit in my office" I laughed taking the elevator down
"I know but I wanted to see the funny pregnant ladies be mad at their husbands"
"You know you're the only one I've met that finds moody pregnant ladies funny"
"Because it's not me"
"You know that's not right, man"
"What are you talking about; Bella was the coolest pregnant lady except for that time when she cried for two hours for a week when she saw her shoes"
"That was kind of funny" I chuckled climbing into the car
"You know it was funnier when she punched the shit out of you for laughing"
"Why'd you have to go and bring that up, that's not okay man" I glared shaking my head, he laughed harder
"Or that time she twisted your nipple for laughing when I called her a penguin"
"You mean after we took the knife from her?"
"Yeah and she twisted your nipple"
"You've got jokes now Nate?"
"Yup"
"This is coming from the guy who was scared of a Chiwawa"
"That's not funny Edward, and you disappoint me"
"How could I possibly disappoint you?"
"I can't believe you stooped so low"
"Me you brought up the fact that Bella twisted my nipple"
"Yeah but I'm supposed to be the immature one not you"
"Yeah right"
"Well you're more mature than me"
"Yeah I am" I smirked stopping in front of his house,
"See ya and tell Bella and the boys I said hi" Nathan said climbing out my car and heading to his house, I honked pulling off and heading down the path, I parked climbing out the car,
"Bella where are you?" I called walking up the steps and loosening my tie,
"I'm in here" she called, I followed her voice into the boys bathroom,
"Hey gorgeous" I smiled kissing her,
"How are my men doing?" I grinned kissing all three
"I'm guessing it's bath time"
"And you'd be correct" she smiled
"Give me 20 minutes?" I begged
"Ask them it's their bath" Bella smirked
"Can you guys wait 20 minutes for daddy?"
"I think that's a yes" Bella smirked
"Beautiful" I smiled jogging across the hall and taking a quick shower and changing, before crossing the hall
"I'm here let the party begin" I grinned slapping my hands together and rubbing them.
We spent the night in their room before putting them to bed and 'hitting the sack' this is where I smile evilly.
3 Months Later, Bella returning to the cat walk
I climbed out the car fixing my hat (outfit on profile), and making my way down the carpet
"Hey where are the kids?" James asked pounding with me,
"Rose and Em are watching them" I said, pounding with Kellan and Justin as we made our way inside,
"Katy" I smiled kissing her cheek
"Hi Edward" she smiled
"I need to see those babies in person one day"
"Just call first" I smiled
"Will do" she laughed, walking off yelling at someone that's Katy for you one of the best managers in the business and she's Bella's manager. I sat between James and Kellan, as the music started playing, and the first model made her way down the cat walk,
"When you sit from this far their legs look like tan and toned skyscrapers" James smiled
"This is so not the place to be if you believe in abstinence" Kellan whispered looking
"Tell me about it" Justin smirked, watching as Chanel made her way down, I heard the cheering then I saw Bella come down the runway, fuck my life is the best
"Is it possible for her to look even hotter after having triplets?" Kellan asked
"Hey watch that" I said, licking my lips
"Lucky bastard" Justin yelled before whistling really loud as Bella exited off the stage
Bella and I left right after the show was done to release Rose and Em,
"You guys weren't kidding" Rose said looking up from her spot on the couch
"Told you" Em smirked
"You mind if we spend the night Ethan's already asleep" Rose asked
"Yeah and thanks" Bella smiled kissing both their cheeks before they headed upstairs, while Bella went to the kitchen
"Late night snacks, with that body Mrs., Cullen it's scandalous" I said sitting her on the counter
"I'm thirsty you idiot" she laughed
"Do you want water...or something bigger?" I asked
"How about both"
"Nope you can't have your cake and eat it too"
"Oh yes I can sweetie and I will"
"You are so greedy"
"Nope I just can't be satisfied" she whispered pulling me to the counter by her legs
"I satisfy every night"
"But we haven't done it tonight have we? So therefore I am left unsatisfied, and as a husband that no good"
"It is no good, I'll have to fix that" I smiled taking the water from her and kissing her, and grabbing the baby monitor because I have a feeling that won't go over so well.
"We got it you two rabbits get some sleep" Rose said taking the monitor
"Thanks" Bella called
"Just know you'll owe me"
"I'll forever be in your debt" Bella hummed into the pillow
We made it downstairs about 3 hours later, and a saw Em holding a carrot and smiling this isn't going to end well,
"Hey you guys know the reason you're so tired all the time is because you have left your primary food…carrots"
"And my primary foot up your ass" Bella snapped, whoa where the hell did that come from
"You need coffee" Em grinned kissing her forehead
"And look" he said waving the carrot around like it was a wand while taking out a cup and pouring coffee into it,
"Presto" Em grinned handing her the cup
"Best magic trick ever" Bella smiled
"What about my coffee?" I asked sticking out my bottom lip
"Get your own coffee" Em grinned, handing me a cup
"Thanks" I laughed pouring my coffee
"No problem, Eddie" Em grinned
"Fuck" someone said we all froze and turned to Ethan who dropped his fork
"Busted" I coughed scratching my head and side stepping away from Rose, I looked at Bella who looked like she was going to burst with laughter, it was the only time her entire face turned into a tomato and it's funny as hell,
"Emmett McCarty Cullen why did my son just say the word fuck" Rose fumed, I saw Bella put her coffee down, yeah good idea before all this laughing makes me burn myself, I don't care what anyone says that's not a good look,
"The media" Em squeaked, I shook with silent laughter as I Bella and I wiped each other's faces
"The media?" Rose glared stalking toward him
"Oh come on Rosie he was going to pick it up sooner or later everyone he's around says fuck, soon he'll be cursing people out after being around Alice" Em defended, he's not dumb all the time blame it on everyone and the Pixie she can't get mad at everyone because that meant getting mad at Esme, Bella, Alice, and the parents no one can do that, and he knew it,
"I know Em I'm sorry I overreacted, I don't know what got into me" Rose said then she started laughing which caused us all to laugh then the flood gates let loose and she began crying like no tomorrow,
"Rose what's wrong?" Em asked holding her, I know that symptom
HERE WE GO AGIAN