Preview: I've been sitting beside hospital beds my whole life," Neville said. "Believe me, I understand what it feels like. You feel helpless, you feel trapped, and most of all you feel guilty because you're not the one who's in pain." Albus felt a wave of emotion come over him. He hugged his arms to his chest, biting his lip and holding it in as best he could. "But guilt isn't what he needs from you right now," Neville went on. He put a hand on Al's shoulder and squeezed gently. "He doesn't need you to solve this, either, he has trained Healers for that. He just needs you to be his friend. That's all."

Raindrops on Roses

Seventh Year Part 5

2024

~*-R-*~

~*-R-*~

By the end of that day, Ravenclaw Tower was in a highly tense mood. The yelling in the common room that morning had been loud and public, and it didn't take long for most of the school to hear about it. If Rose had hoped that perhaps people would not be interested, she had forgotten that she was now the Minister for Magic's daughter, and of course Scorpius had his own kind of macabre infamy.

Scorpius was suspiciously absent all day, and Rose decided to skip dinner both to avoid the stares and whispers and potentially having to face him again. She went to her room instead, closed the curtains around her four-poster and tried to remember all the ways she knew to reverse time. She wondered if her mother could get her a time turner, or if - she amended, after considering the futility of that idea - she could steal one. There were one or two left, she recalled, under extreme security in the Ministry of Magic. Her dad, she thought, might know where, but he was even less likely than Hermione to be sympathetic to her situation.

The curtain was pulled aside, and she buried her face in her pillow against the lamplight, and against anyone seeing her red eyes.

"What's going on?" her cousin's voice broke through the fog of misery, and she looked up, blearily.

"Albus - what- ?"

"Everyone's saying Scorp accused you of snogging Chung," Al said with expressive distaste. "And neither of you were at dinner."

Rose fell back. "Go away, Al. How did you even get in here?"

"What's his problem?" he demanded, ignoring her. "I mean why would he say that? Is he mental?"

"I don't know why he said it," Rose mumbled miserably.

"Dickhead," Albus growled. Rose blinked at him. She couldn't remember any time in the last three months that Albus had said a single bad word against his friend. "I mean, Chung? Is he crazy? Did he take too much of his potion, or what?"

She sighed and sat up, running tired hands through her hair and staring down at the sheets bundled in her lap. "Al…"

"No, really. Look I know he's been through a lot, and I've been doing everything I can to support him, but why would he say - "

"I did it." Rose said quietly.

" - something like that? You - what?" Albus blinked again and made a scrunched up, puzzled face. "What did you say?"

Rose took a deep breath, continuing to stare at her knees. "I said, I did it. After he yelled at me, I went to the library, and Jian was there, and I just…" She shook her head. "I don't know how it happened."

Al's expression twisted even further into a confused grimace. "What d'you mean? When was this?"

"I said, this morning, after he… he yelled at me about seeing Jian, and I told him he was crazy, but he seemed so sure about it and it just made me so angry, and I… I… I don't know, I met Jian and he kissed me, and I… kissed him back. Sort of."

Al looked as though he'd been hit with a Confundus Curse. "You did what?"

"Al, please don't make me feel worse than I already do…"

"It's true?"

"No! Well… I mean, no, it wasn't when he said it, but then…"

"That makes no sense!"

"I know! I know, it's crazy…"

"Why would you do that?" he demanded, his face bright red behind his glasses.

"I told you, I was really angry, and upset, and he was being nice…"

"Wait. Wait." Al held up a hand, his expression changing rapidly from confusion to anger. "Did you say Chung kissed you?"

"Al, that's not the -"

He growled animalistically. "That mother-"

"AL! That's not the point, okay? It's done. It happened. Now I just have to figure out how to make Scorp ever talk to me again. Can you help me with that?"

For a moment she thought he would refuse. He looked angry enough; but in the end he seemed to decide he was angrier with Jian than he was with her. "Fine," he said, shortly. "What do you want me to do?"

"Just…." Rose swallowed, wondering what possible way this would come out the way she wanted - the way she needed it to go. "Ask him how… why he said those things. Why he thought I would… I would do that to him."

"He was right, though."

Rose glared at him. "I'm aware of that. But it never would have happened if he hadn't accused me of it in the first place. Never! He has to know that. He has to."

"So you're blaming it on him?"

"No!"

He gave her a sharp look. "It kind of sounds like you are."

Rose did her best to stamp down the anger that was once again rearing its ugly head. "If you're not going to help you can just go away," she snapped, and turned her back on him, curling up on her side on the bed and shutting her eyes. After a moment, she heard his footsteps retreat towards the door. "Al?" The footsteps paused.

"Yeah?"

She curled up closer into the pillow, tears coming to her eyes again. "Please just… tell him I'm sorry."

~*-A-*~

~*-A-*~

Albus stared, blankly, into the slightly reddened face of his friend. "You… what?" It seemed like he was saying that a lot today. "This is mental," he added, rubbing his forehead. He was getting a headache.

Scorpius shrugged and didn't meet his eyes. "Yeah. Well."

"How long has this… this…"

"I told you. Since the Moonsilver." Scorpius shrugged again. "But it's been mostly stupid things," he added. "Except a couple times. Well, a few times, I guess… like the Minister's heart attack… um..."

Albus held up a hand. "Okay, okay, just… shut up. Why didn't you say anything?"

"Do you want me to shut up or do you want me to explain?"

Albus glared at him. "Explain in a way that makes sense," he said through gritted teeth.

Scorpius sighed. "I thought after a while they would go away," he said, looking decidedly shifty. "Like it was just a weird side effect that would wear off. But the dreams are… well, they're... not going away." He shrugged again. "And usually its hard to tell what's real, and what's usual nonsense dream stuff. But this time, it really felt real. Real like it must have already happened. I don't know."

Albus tried to process this. He'd woken up late that morning after sneaking out of Lizzie's dormitory once all her fellow Hufflepuffs were asleep. He was aware that this was more than a little skeevy, but when they'd all come in from dinner while he and Lizzie had been already ensconced under the covers, there hadn't been much he could do about it. So he'd spent most of the day thinking about that - and, if he was honest with himself, when he could organise for it to happen again. He'd sat with Lizzie in classes, not noticing that Rose and Scorpius were either absent or not sitting together. He had noticed that they weren't at dinner. Only then had he started to pick up on the whispering going on around him; especially once he got back to Ravenclaw Tower. Now, not only was he having to take in the fact that Rose had kissed Jian, but that Scorpius was apparently now a dream Seer, and had been ever since they'd brought him back to the Leaky Cauldron. He shook his head. "You really can't catch a break this year, can you?" he said.

Scorpius did not smile.

"Look," he went on, wondering if there was even some tiny scrap of all this to be salvaged and if so, how on earth he was going to manage it. "Rose is really upset. She's not been with Jian, or anything, she's not seeing him behind your back. Do you really think she would?"

Scorpius had at least the decency to look uncomfortable. "Well… no, not really," he admitted. "She did kiss him though," he added, with a low ferocity. "Didn't she?"

"Well…" Albus was wishing Rose had never come clean to him. "Yes."

Scorpius' face, if it were possible, became even more miserable, as though he'd been holding out one last shred of hope that he'd been imagining things.

"But only after you yelled at her about it in front of the whole common room," Albus went on. "I guess she thought you were blaming her anyway, might as well give you something to blame her for. Its not an excuse, but..."

"What? But - " Scorp frowned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "That doesn't sound like her either," he said after a moment.

"No, it doesn't. She's really a mess about it. She said to tell you she's sorry and she didn't mean for it to happen." At least, he thought that had been the message, it was hard to get any kind of clarity out of the events of the last hour.

Scorpius' frown only deepened, and he said: "don't tell me you're taking her side."

"Mate, I don't know. I have no bloody idea what's going on. I'm just telling you what she said."

His friend seemed dissatisfied with this, but Albus could think of nothing else to say. Instead he got up and started changing into his night things while Scorpius just sat there in his chair, apparently thinking.

"Hey," he said after a while. "Where were you last night?"

"Huh?" Albus wondered if it were possible to pretend he had been here all along. Probably not, he thought. Shit.

"Last night. You didn't come in til way past lights-out."

He hesitated. Any other time he would have been thrilled to tell Scorpius all about where he'd been and what he'd been doing. Now was the worst possible timing, but it couldn't be helped. Any half-baked lie would be sure to come out sooner or later, and he owed Scorpius better than a lie, anyway. "I was, er… with Lizzie," he said, finally, sitting on the edge of the bed in his pyjamas and taking off his glasses - mainly so he wouldn't have to see his friend's face.

"You - what? At two in the morning."

"Um. Yeah."

There was a very heavy pause as Scorpius tapped his fingers on the arms of his chair. "Aren't you still with Cleo?" he asked, in a slightly dangerous tone.

Albus winced. "Not anymore." He really didn't want to have to relive that conversation, ever. Even via Floo - especially by Floo - it had been extremely awkward. Cleo had actually been upset - he was sure he'd seen tears in her eyes. He wasn't sure why he'd just assumed that she wouldn't really care. He hadn't said anything about Lizzie - he was not that stupid - instead blaming the long distance and their lack of anything in common for his sudden decision to break it off. But he thought she might have sensed the truth, anyway.

"Oh." Another pause. "Did you… you know…"

Albus grinned, despite himself. "Yeah."

Scorpius swore softly, but he didn't sound angry. "What was it like?" he asked finally. Albus wasn't sure, but he thought he detected more than curiosity in his friend's voice. Immediately he felt guilt wash over him in a wave, and the grin faded. Much as he disliked the mental image of his best friend in bed with his cousin - ugh - he knew Scorpius was wondering if he would even ever get the chance, himself.

"Fine," he said, quickly, going red and making as if to go to bed.

"Al," Scorp said shortly. Albus forced himself to meet his eyes. Scorpius smiled at him, a little sadly, but it was a smile, all the same. Relieved, Albus smiled back. "Seriously," Scorp prompted.

Albus' smile widened. "It was incredible," he said, finally allowing himself to enjoy the feeling that had filled him all day.

~*-S-*~

~*-S-*~

It had actually been a relief to talk to Albus for half an hour about his night with Lizzie - though he'd insisted on being spared the details. Lizzie was after all like a sister to him, and he wasn't sure he'd be able to look Neville in the eye again otherwise. But at least for half an hour he hadn't had to think about himself, about the endless dreams that plagued him every night, about the giant crack in his relationship that he may or may not have caused, about his father being in prison and the trial that could happen any day, and most of all about being unable to walk, of being unable to wash or dress himself without magic, and of the pain he was in constantly as his body struggled to heal itself.

But now, with nothing else to occupy his thoughts, the pain returned, and got worse. He was always in pain at night, after the regrowth potion, which was still working on strengthening the new bones and nerves in his spine. But usually after a few minutes he got drowsy enough - exhausted enough - to drop off to sleep, where despite the occasionally disturbing dreams he at least could sleep through the pain. Tonight though, sleep refused to come.

Rose had kissed Jian. What did it matter whether she'd done it before or after he told her he knew about it? She'd still done it. A treacherous voice insisted that Albus had not exactly been the most chivalrous example, either, and Scorpius was still friends with him, but at least Albus had had the sense to break up with Cleo as soon as possible. How did Rose expect things to just be the same? When he'd had to watch that awful scene in the library... in the dream, he hadn't heard any of the words, but he'd seen quite enough, and woken in a sweat. When he'd seen Rose the next morning, he hadn't been able to stop himself. He couldn't look at her without seeing her with her arms around Chung. But the look on her face when he accused her… it had been real. Albus must be right - Scorpius had driven her to it. It was his fault.

Sleep, he thought desperately. You have to stop thinking about this and go to sleep.

The pain was getting worse. His brain refused to shut down, and the more he thought about it, the worse it got. Eventually all thoughts of Rose and Jian were driven out of his mind, and he started to realise that something was really wrong. He hadn't been in this much pain since St. Mungos, and maybe even then…

He lay still as a statue, not daring to move, while agony laced up and down his spine. He wasn't due his pain potion for another two days. He would have taken it anyway, but when he finally tried to move, to reach for it, the pain was so bad he saw stars. At one point, unable to bear it anymore, he tried to call for help, to call Albus' name, but his voice didn't seem to be working. He tried to scream, and nothing came out. Any minute, he thought, any minute he would pass out, and when he woke up it wouldn't be as bad. His back was burning. His chest was burning. He was on fire. His curse scar was like a white hot spear through his body.

He wondered if he would die. At least then it wouldn't hurt anymore, he thought, but then he thought of Hannah, and Neville and Alice and the people who cared about him. He thought about Rose and how the last thing he would have ever said to her would have been stupid words. He thought about Albus, and how guilty he'd been even though it wasn't really his fault, and how much worse it would be after he, Scorpius, had gone, and he thought about how he would miss Teddy and Victoire's wedding. He didn't want to die, he thought feverishly as he tried to cling to the living world. Hours passed, and still he lay there, unable to move or speak, feeling weaker and weaker with each minute that went by. Help, he thought. Someone… please…

Suddenly, someone drew back the curtains. "Scorp?" said an urgent voice. It was Albus. "Are you okay? What's wrong?" It was dark; Scorpius could only just see his face outlined by the moonlight through the gap.

He bit his lip hard and shook his head, gritting his teeth against the way this sent hot lances through his chest.

"Shit." Albus came around to the pillow, nearly tripping over Scorpius' trunk in the process. "Lumos," he muttered furiously, and Scorpius shut his eyes quickly against the sudden light. "What is it? Do you need your potion?"

"It's worse… than that," Scorpius managed. His voice came out in a hoarse, half whisper. "Al, it really hurts…"

"Peter!" Albus called. He turned his face away but the sudden sharp sound still made Scorpius start and open his eyes. It was bright, but at least he could see, and he was no longer alone in a dark cage of pain. He groaned.

"What's going on?" muttered Peter's voice from somewhere. "It's two in the morning."

"Go get Madam Pomfrey," Albus said sharply. "Tell her to call Healer Knox at St. Mungo's, then come up here."

"Al…" Scorpius whispered. He didn't know what he wanted to say, or do. He just wanted someone, anyone, to make the pain go away.

"It's okay," Albus said, dragging over a desk chair and sitting on it so he could take his friend's hand. "It's okay. I'm right here. Help's coming." His voice was shaky, but firm. Scorpius looked up at him and took a deep breath. Albus wouldn't let him die.

~*-A-*~

~*-A-*~

Pomfrey and Knox came, and though it was probably only a few minutes, it felt like hours. Pomfrey was out of breath - she was after all getting on in years - but didn't let it get in the way of her quickfire diagnostic charms. Knox muttered to himself while doing his own spells. One of them made Scorpius' whole body shudder, and his hand tightened hard on Albus' fingers.

"You're hurting him!" Al protested. His heart was in his throat. Scorpius was deathly pale. The vision of him lying in a pool of blood in the abandoned factory kept flashing in front of his eyes. This couldn't be happening. They'd come so far, been through so much. How was this happening now?

"Hold on, lad," Knox said, low, in Scorpius' ear. The seriousness in his voice was even more terrifying than the way Scorpius was grimacing in pain. Albus knew Knox. Had spent every Sunday since the end of summer observing him with patients. Knox was never serious.

"Hurts…" Scorpius murmured, his voice only just audible. "Please…"

"Its okay," Albus said, forcing himself to speak calmly. He had done this before, with patients at the hospital who were in pain, sat with them, reassured them. It always made him feel good afterwards, knowing that he had helped even if only some tiny way. But this was different, this was his best friend. He could sense Peter and Gaius standing awkwardly in the background in their pyjamas, not sure what they should be doing or if they should be doing anything. "Just hold on."

Pomfrey took a small bag from her pocket and enlarged it with her wand. She dug through it, pulled out a handful of vials, uncorked one of them, and held Scorpius' head so that she could pour it into his mouth. He coughed a little, but managed to swallow it, and after a few seconds his breathing evened out, his eyes fluttered shut, and his hand went limp in Albus' grip.

"What's wrong with him?" Albus asked, carefully straightening his friend's arm by his side before standing up shakily and looking over at Knox. He knew the man wouldn't lie to him.

Knox's face was troubled in a way that he'd never seen it. "It could be a number of things," he said. "How long has he been like this?"

Albus felt the question like a stab to the heart, but all he could do was answer honestly. "I don't know," he said, his mouth dry as a bone. "He was like this when I woke up. He… usually tosses and turns, all night. But I woke up just now and he was dead quiet, so I thought I should check… but he was fine when we went to bed, I swear," he added, realising with every awful passing second that Scorpius could have been like this for hours, and Albus had been two feet away the whole time. "He was smiling, talking normally…"

Knox checked his watch and did a few more spells, still frowning. Scorpius, still and pale, looked as though he wasn't even breathing.

Albus swallowed. "What… what do we do?" he asked.

"Perhaps he should go to St Mungo's," Pomfrey suggested.

Knox shook his head. "No," he said, scratching his chin. He exchanged glances with her, and Albus could read the reason in their eyes. They didn't think Scorpius would survive the journey. "He shouldn't be in this much pain, still," Knox muttered, in the way he did when he was concentrating particularly hard on something. "The structure is whole, we were merely strengthening the nerves…"

"Could it be a reaction?" Albus suggested. "Could he be allergic to something else int he potions, not just Moonsilver?" Out of the corner of his eye he saw Madam Pomfrey look at him sharply.

"A sound hypothesis, but any reaction so severe as this would have shown itself long before now, if it were the potions," Knox said.

"Something's gone wrong with the Healing then," Albus said. It was the only explanation he could think of. Knox gave him a sharp look, although he hadn't meant it to sound accusing. He was just trying to find an answer, something they could fix, to make him okay again.

Seeing he was of no more use, he backed off and sat on his bed, watching as the two Healers did more spells and muttered to each other in low voices. There was nothing else he could do. His foot quivered against the floor; he was cold in his pyjamas, but he didn't even think of moving to get a cloak. He kept his eyes on Scorpius' face, afraid that if he looked away even for a second, something else would go wrong.

Eventually Knox stood back. "I must go to the hospital," he said. "For some research. Mr Potter, you're in charge of general care until I return."

Albus blinked and looked at Madam Pomfrey. She was frowning a little, but did not argue. When Knox had swept out of the dormitory, apparently fully aware of where he was going - Albus remembered vaguely that Knox had once told him that he'd been a Ravenclaw, himself - Pomfry straightened the sheets around Scorpius' body before coming around to Albus' side. "Are you all right?" she asked, with a softness he'd never heard from her before. Behind them, Peter and Gaius were inconspicuously getting back in their beds, whispering quietly to each other.

He shook his head sharply. "This is my fault," he said hoarsely. "I should have known."

"But you did know," Pomfrey reminded him. "You sensed something was wrong, and you checked on him and called his Healer. You may very well have saved his life, you realise."

Albus found that hard to believe. He was sure, somehow that he could have - should have - done more. Done something else. Something better, sooner.

"You have good instincts," Pomfrey went on. "I admit I hadn't considered another allergy."

"I… I've been studying diagnostics," Albus said, very low. He hadn't told anyone yet about his extra reading, not even his best friends, though he wasn't sure why. "And training with Knox, at St. Mungo's… I started to think I could really be a Healer. Stupid," he muttered. What made him think he would ever be able to really help people? When it really came to it, like tonight, he was useless.

"Not at all," Pomfrey said, surprised. "I think you would be an excellent Healer."

Albus sat up, and looked between her and Scorpius' prone form. "But -"

"Mr Potter, you can't expect to be the one to single-handedly heal your friend. What is wrong with him is complex and unique, it's a challenge even to experts like Knox, and would take years of training and study to truly understand it. But you could get there one day. You have the instinct, like I said. That's something that can't be learned."

Albus rubbed his eyes and shook his head. Pomfrey patted him on the shoulder and stood up, quite straight, no longer showing any signs of age despite her neatly-pinned grey hair. "So much like your father," she said. "Well, not quite like. None of you have yet to beat his record for visits to the Hospital Wing, for which I am grateful."

He only shrugged. In his own mind he couldn't be any less like his father. His father, the famous hero, wouldn't have let Scorpius get hurt in the first place.

She sighed. "Perhaps you should try and get some sleep?" she suggested. "I'll watch over him until Healer Knox returns."

Albus shook his head. "No," he said. "He's my friend." He got up and went back to his chair by Scorpius' side. "I'm staying with him."

People came and went over the next few hours. Pomfrey went out for a bit, leaving Albus with an emergency potion in case Scorpius woke up again. Peter and Gaius, who were clearly only pretending to be asleep, eventually got up and slipped out of the dormitory, pausing only to ask whether Albus wanted them to fetch anything, or anyone.

Albus was too preoccupied to think of an answer, but after they'd left he wondered if he shouldn't have told them to fetch Neville. He was after all still Scorp's legal guardian. He needn't have worried, though, since Pomfrey had apparently already thought of this. When she came back, Neville was right behind her, looking as though he had just thrown on robes over his pyjamas. His hair was sticking up all over the place, but his eyes were wide awake. When he saw Scorpius, his face fell.

"Knox?" he asked Pomfrey, a little hoarsely.

"Coming back once he has the right resources," she replied.

Neville ran a hand over his face and nodded. "Hannah will be here as soon as she can get our youngest to her grandfather's," he said. "Thank you for calling me, Poppy."

As Madam Pomfrey did her checks, Neville sat beside Albus. "All right, lad?" he asked, softly.

Albus glared at him. "I'm fine," he snapped in a low whisper. It didn't seem right to speak loudly, even though Scorpius was unconscious and the sleeping potion probably wouldn't wear off still for hours. "People have to stop worrying about me, I'm not the one who's lying there."

Neville nodded. He didn't seem hurt or surprised by this outburst. He put a hand on Al's arm. "No, you're the one sitting here," he said. "Sometimes that's harder."

Albus pulled his arm away. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Pomfrey shot them a warning look. Neville stood up and beckoned Albus towards him. Reluctantly, Al left Scorpius' side and followed him to the other end of the dormitory. Suddenly and completely irrationally, he remembered that just over twenty four hours ago he'd been hooking up with the Professor's eldest daughter. He found himself quite unable to meet the man's eyes.

"I've been sitting beside hospital beds my whole life," Neville said. "Believe me, I understand what it feels like. You feel helpless, you feel trapped, and most of all you feel guilty because you're not the one who's in pain." Albus felt a wave of emotion come over him. He hugged his arms to his chest, biting his lip and holding it in as best he could. "But guilt isn't what he needs from you right now," Neville went on. He put a hand on Al's shoulder and squeezed gently. "He doesn't need you to solve this, either, he has trained Healers for that. He just needs you to be his friend. That's all."

This time Albus didn't dare look away. Suddenly he missed his mother very much. It was stupid, he was an adult now, but all he wanted was to curl up in his mum's lap and cry. Instead he nodded stiffly. "I can do that," he said.

"Good. Does Rose know?"

Al shook his head. "No…I… I didn't want to have to wake her whole dormitory…"

"No, that's best. Someone should at least get a full night's sleep. Then she can take over from us when we need a rest, eh?"

Albus frankly didn't intend on doing any such thing, not until Scorpius was better, but he thought better of making an issue of it. He nodded, looking over Neville's shoulder at the wheelchair tucked neatly into the corner of the room. He was already starting to miss the days when the chair had been the biggest obstacle they had to face.

~*-R-*~

~*-R-*~

"Rose?"

Rose opened bleary eyes. She'd cried herself to sleep, and it seemed like only minutes ago. Her face felt as though it were covered in snot and tears, and her hair was a tangled mess and stuck to her cheeks in places. She pulled the covers over her head. "I'm not going," she muttered. "Tell them I'm sick." It would be the first time she'd ever skipped class at Hogwarts, unless she was really ill, but she didn't care. She just wanted to wallow in her own misery for a while. And maybe take a shower at some point.

"Rose." Janey's voice sounded uncharacteristically serious. "It's Scorpius."

He looked like he was only sleeping. She didn't understand how he could have gotten so much worse overnight.

"Knox said, it could be the feeling in his spine coming back," Albus said grimly. "Something connecting where it didn't, before." He was still in his pyjamas, although he clearly hadn't slept for several hours. He was sitting in one of three armchairs that had been brought up from the common room. No one was questioning the missing furniture - the whole tower was in a hush, the news being exchanged in whispers as people left for breakfast.

"But that's good, isn't it?" Rose asked with a rush of hope.

Albus shook his head. "Not if it hurts him that much." His voice cracked a little on the words as he said, "you didn't see him, Rosie. No way he could live like that. He… he looked like he was…" He put his head in his hands, covering his face. Rose didn't know what to make of it. When Scorpius had been in the hospital with a hole through his chest, Albus had dealt with it by being almost jovial. Seeing him so depressed now was frightening. It was as though he had given up hope.

Rose sat beside him, looking at Scorpius' still, pale face. Was this because of her? Had what she had done with Jian sent him into some kind of spiral? "You should have woken me up," she said. How long had he been like this? Hours? While she'd just been sleeping, oblivious to his pain?

"There wasn't any point," Al said, wiping his eyes and lowering his hands to stare into his lap. "We can't do anything. Just wait."

"This is wrong," she said, furiously. "Why does this keep happening? It's not fair!"

Al only shook his head again.

Rose walked around the bed and knelt beside Scorpius' pillow. She reached out and brushed a look of his hair away from his forehead. It was just now starting to get back to what she thought of as its proper length. His cheeks were very pale, and there were dark circles under his eyes. "I'm sorry," she said, very softly, and kissed him lightly just over his brow. His forehead was clammy. "What are we going to do?" she asked softly.

Al looked up at her. They were the only two left in the dormitory. Hannah and Neville had been there for a while, but had apparently taken a break in order to take care of some things that would have to be managed in their respective absences. Pomfrey had gone back to work in the hospital wing, and Knox, after making several visits, seemed to have left Albus in charge for the time being. Rose might have argued about this - she loved her cousin, but he wasn't a Healer. Except Knox wasn't there to argue with, so she would have to wait.

"We can't - " Albus started.

"No, I mean… if - when, when he comes out of this…. then what do we do?" she said, emotion building in her throat. "We can't just keep on like we have been."

"What else can we do?" he demanded.

"We're not doing enough," she said, slamming her fist on her knees. "I'm not doing enough."

"Yeah, well, not cheating on him might be a good start," Al muttered.

Rose flinched and turned away, forcing back tears.

He sat back with a sigh. He looked exhausted. "Sorry. I didn't mean that."

She sniffed, and managed to get a hold of herself. This wasn't the time for tears - they wouldn't do any good. "No, you're right," she sighed. "That was wrong, and I… I haven't been patient enough… I can do better."

She took Scorpius' hand and let her eyes wander until they landed on the guitar case, sticking out from under the side of the bed. "We have to get him playing again," she said. "He's not the same if he can't play music. I'm sure it would help."

But Albus was looking at her doubtfully. "Rose…"

"What?" she demanded.

"I think… look, I know we all just sort of expected that he'd get better, eventually, but after this… I dunno. Maybe we have to accept that he's not going to get out of the chair."

Rose stared at him. She wanted to refuse to believe it, to say that they shouldn't give up hope, but… it had been months, now, and there hadn't been any signs of improvement. And now this. "Even so," she said instead, very low. "Even if… he can still play. He needs that, Alby, I know he does. It'd make him whole again. Or at least, it'd be a start. It'd be something."

Albus rubbed at his forehead tiredly. "So? How are you going to get him playing? You heard him, he's not interested anymore. Cleo gave up asking him to come back to the band. And I don't really blame him," he added in a low mutter. "If I were him I wouldn't much feel like singing either."

Rose's expression deepened into a determined frown. "I'll think of something," she said firmly.

~*-S-*~

~*-S-*~

He saw mistletoe hanging above the bed, and heard singing, as if from far away.

Ding dong merrily on high…. the angel bells are ringing…

He sat there for a moment, watching her sleep. She was truly beautiful, even when lying still in a hospital bed. Her bushy hair shone redder than usual in the dim light, spread out over the crisp white pillows. She was quite pale, and there was sweat beading on her forehead. As he watched, her expression twisted from one of peace into one of pain.

Ding dong verily the sky… is riddl'd with angles singing...

He tried to move towards her, but someone grabbed his arm. And then, as he tried to pull away, the dream-Rose opened her eyes, and began to scream.

"Come away, lad."

"No!"

The assailant dragged him out of the room as people rushed past them. He looked up in the hated face of Rose's father. Why was he keeping him away, when Rose was in pain? "You can't do any good," the man said seriously. Behind him he could still hear the screaming.

"I should be there with her!"

"You'll only be in the way."

Gloooo-ooooo-ooooo-ooooo-ooooo-oooooria, Hosanna in Excelsis!

Rose's dad pulled him further away and into a chair.

"This is all my fault," Scorpius muttered, putting his head in his hands.

"Yes," Ron said grimly.

When Scorpius woke again, it was daylight and he was very comfortable and warm. And numb, he realised as he tested his fingers, which only moved very slowly. In fact he felt very strange all over. He opened his eyes and blinked until the view came into focus. Rose was sitting there, but she was staring past him to a spot on the opposite wall. She was wearing what he thought of as her thinking face.

"Hey," he said. The word came out very hoarse; he had to make an effort to be heard at all.

She jumped and looked down at him. "Hey," she said, a relieved smile breaking out on her face. She took his hand and threaded her fingers between his, which tingled as feeling gradually returned to them. "How do you feel?"

"Weird," Scorpius said honestly. He felt very light, but at the same time weighed down, like a balloon tied to a stone. And he felt dizzy, but he was lying down. That was weird, wasn't it?

Rose looked worried for a minute, then she said: "well, you are on a lot of potions. You aren't in pain?"

Memory flooded back like a tidal wave of razorblades. He'd been stuck, paralysed with pain, for how long he wasn't sure, and then Albus had come, and then Knox, and then, blackness. He gasped and shut his eyes tight for a moment against the memory.

"Scorp?" Rose said quickly, and he felt her start to get up. "What is it, does it -"

"No," he muttered, giving her hand a squeeze. "No, I… I'm okay. No pain, not now." He opened his eyes to see her sitting back slowly into the chair, watching him carefully.

"Are you sure?" she asked, looking searchingly into his eyes as though trying to work out if he was lying to make her feel better.

"Yeah. I was just… remembering." He shuddered. "It was awful. How long was I out?"

"Two days," Rose said, making him start.

"What? But - crap, how much class did I miss?"

"About two days worth," she said, with a half-hearted smile. "Don't worry, you'll catch up."

"Like I'm not already behind," Scorpius groaned. He looked around. He was in the hospital wing. "How'd I get here?"

"Madam Pomfrey and Knox brought you down from the dormitory last night," she explained. "As soon as they were sure it wouldn't hurt you more. Al's been here the whole time," she said. "I made him go get something to eat, but he hasn't left your side, otherwise. He even slept here last night."

Scorpius blinked, noticing that the bed beside his was looking a little rumpled. Before he could comment however, he realised that Rose was still speaking.

"He told me about your dreams," she went on, her hand loosening a little in his as though she expected him to pull away. "I don't know why you wouldn't tell us… but… well, I think I understand better now, what's been bothering you." She bit her lip. "I'm sorry about Jian, Scorp. Really, I… I swear it didn't mean anything at all, I was just angry, and stupid… and I thought you were pushing me away, so I… I'm sorry."

He stared at her. He'd forgotten about the incident entirely until she'd brought it up, and now it seemed so long ago and far away. It took him a second to catch up. "No, I was wrong," he said, when he finally felt like he was grounded enough in the conversation. "I don't know why I thought… because the dreams have always been about the future. I should have realised if I just told you about it, it wouldn't happen. But of course I go and make it so it does happen. It's like a bad time travel novel."

Her face was hard to read. "So… you're not angry with me?"

Scorpius considered. Maybe he should be, he thought. He had been, last night - or two nights ago, or whenever it was. He looked up at her face and remembered how he had clawed himself back from what felt like the brink of death, thinking about how he didn't want to leave her with words of anger. He thought about the dream he'd had just now, the one he'd had several times now but seemed to grow sharper every time. How far away was it? How was he going to stop it happening? She - she and Albus - they were all that was keeping him sane. If he lost that…

"I love you," he said finally. He didn't miss the way her eyes widened and her fingers tightened on his. When was the last time he had said it? Too long, probably. He wished he could move properly, he wanted to reach up and touch her face, to sit up and kiss her… "I love you," he said again, his eyes filling with hot tears that threatened to fall and make a fool of him. "I don't… please don't…"

"It's okay," she said, leaning towards him. "Hey. I love you too. I'm sorry."

"Me too." He took a deep breath. "Kiss me? Please?"

She smiled and a soft laugh escaped. "You really are on a lot of potions."

"Rose…"

"Shh." She closed the distance between them and touched her lips softly to his. "It's going to be okay. You'll see. Just rest."

"Not yet. I've been asleep for ages." He looked up at her, suddenly feeling lightheaded. Maybe the potions really were affecting him.

"Hey, what -" They looked over to see Albus standing still in the doorway with a half-eaten sandwich in his hand. "Oh no," he moaned. "I just went out for five minutes…"

"It's okay," Scorpius said, smiling at him. "I know you were here."

"No but seriously, I really meant to be here when you woke up. How are you?"

"On some pretty hard potions, apparently. I feel high as a kite and I can't move anything."

Albus pulled up a chair on the same side as Rose, so he didn't have to turn his head to look between them. "Yeah, we're going to take you off the numbing draughts bit by bit. Mate, you really scared the crap out of me."

Scorpius winced. "Sorry."

"Al's been helping Knox look after you - and Neville and Hannah were here too," Rose explained. "We were all so worried."

He swallowed. He felt guilty for dragging Hannah away from the pub, and Neville from lessons. But at the same time it was nice, knowing that someone cared that much. "I'm lucky to have all you guys," he said, feeling his eyelids try to close and forcing them open. "Really. I'm sorry I'm such a git to live with right now."

"You aren't," Albus said firmly.

"Yeah, I am. It's just… you know… everything."

"We know." Rose leaned over and hugged him as best she could. "We can't imagine how hard it must be, Scorp. But we're here for you, okay? Just… please don't hold it all back. We want to know if you're in pain, or you're having weird Seer dreams, or if you need help with schoolwork, okay? You don't have to do this alone."

"Yeah, okay." He yawned. "Hey, did Al tell you about him and Lizzie?"

"What?"

Albus glared at him. "Oi, tattletale, don't think I won't thump you as soon as you're well enough."

"What happened with Lizzie?" Rose demanded.

Scorpius closed his eyes, letting the sound of their bickering lull him into a doze. It was funny how it made him feel safe. Just knowing they were there.

Thank you everyone so much for your patience and encouragement over the last few months. I know the time between chapters has become ridiculous, but I have been busy with life stuff. However my new years resolutions for 2015 included finishing this story, so hopefully a few more will be flying your way soon! Please take the time to leave me a comment, I really appreciate it!