There was a breathing that wasn't his. Drowsy, Juice opened his eyes, narrowing them because of the bright light shining through the windows. Apparently he hadn't closed the curtains last night. He was in his apartment – which made the breathing of someone else even stranger. He never took Croweaters home. He rolled on his side. The other was lying with the back towards him. Juice recognized the partly shaved haircut immediately. Shane – no wait, Alex.

Slowly the memories trickled in.

Alex, a woman. Half Sack's older sister.

A frustrated grunt escaped his lips as he remembered certain things he had said the night before and he buried his face in his pillow. Again he had been crying for half of the night; he'd called himself a coward and a failure... Shame washed over him and he pressed his face deeper into the pillow. He had told her he wanted her, he had literally begged her to stay with him. He was pathetic. Why the hell would she want to be with a crybaby like him? Without a doubt she was the most bad ass chick he had ever met and the past days he had done nothing but making a fool of himself.

Next to him, he felt her turn around. "You okay?"

"I just started to walk the imaginary Walk of Shame," he muttered, trying to keep things light for once.

She chuckled. "Good luck. I'll sleep a little longer then."

"I think that you're supposed to join me."

"Nah, I know no shame."

He started to laugh mockingly. "Yeah, noticed that." Knowing he couldn't hide behind a pillow all day long, he rolled on his side again and watched her. Her glance wasn't as warm as he had hoped; it was rather a little reserved.

"How mad are you?" she asked.

Juice sighed. "To be honest I'm done with feeling angry and scared, if you don't mind."

"I think I can live with that," she smirked.

It was true. He had had a couple of rough days, but both Clay and Alex had been right. He had to let things go. There was no shred of remorse that he had killed Miles now he knew what the guy had done, he was no longer blackmailed by Roosevelt and they had covered his mistake very well. He owed her so much that it made his anger fade.

His hand glided underneath her back and with a quick movement he rolled her on top of him. "But you still got some makin' up to do." Surprise radiated from her face. Juice stretched out his hand and tugged a long strand of her hair behind her ear that had been hanging in front of her eyes. "You gimme a striptease again?"

"When I started that yesterday you almost freaked out."

"That was before I knew what nice things were underneath your shirt." He wiggled his eyebrows.

She brought her face closer to his, their noses were slightly touching. "What happened to you tonight?"

"You, Alex. You happened to me," he said honestly, keeping her glance. "And I just can't express how happy I am that you're a chick, even though I thought otherwise last night. Subtlety isn't exactly your strong suit, huh?" His hands moved down her back until he reached the hem of her shirt – his shirt – and they slipped underneath the fabric, exploring the curving of her back.

With one elbow she rested at the mattress, supporting her head with her hand. "I honestly had no idea how to tell you who I am and in my fantasy the revelation was way hotter."

He pulled up one knee and rolled over, so he was on top. His lips wandered to her neck, kissing her skin until he felt her shiver with pleasure. Slowly his kisses climbed higher, until he reached her air. "What other fantasies did you have?" he whispered, searching for her eyes.

She smiled, with her forefinger she drew a line along his lips. "Haven't seen that wicked grin before."

"I'm savin' it for the ladies."

"Oh, I'm a lady now?"

He lifted the corner of his mouth. The long boxer shorts he felt against his knees, told him the opposite. Although he usually got off on sexy lingerie, he wasn't less excited now. "Hmm, you're too bad ass to be a lady and it makes me fucking horny."

"Yeah, I can see that." Shoving a hand underneath her head, she looked up at him with a grin. Still she didn't make a move, didn't touch him, and he had no idea if she didn't want this or if she was just challenging him. He leaned a little more to the side, creating space so that his fingers could slip underneath her shirt. While they climbed higher and higher across her stomach and her ribs, he kept looking a bit tensed at her. He was used to women who couldn't keep their hands away from him and it made him insecure. Was it because of Miles? Did this call up memories? Her body didn't feel tensed and her breathing sounded normal, but he didn't trust his instincts very well since he neither had noticed that she had been a girl.

Just before he reached her breasts, she rolled from underneath him, pushing him on his back. Immediately she wrapped a leg over his. Her fingers tiptoed across his stomach. It tickled, making his muscles tense in a spastic way. She leaned closer to him, her lips were just an inch away from his. Very lightly she kissed him, before she trailed kissed to his ear. Her warm breathing against his auricle made him shiver.

"You wanna know about my other fantasies?" she whispered.

His breathing was stuck in his throat. Her tone drove him wild, he wanted her so bad there was a throbbing feeling between his legs. As if she could feel that too, her fingers glided across his boxer shorts, wrapping around him and squeezing softly, teasing. He wished he could feel her touch directly on his skin, but he didn't want to sound desperate by speaking out that thought.

"I fantasized... about havin' sex on your bike," she whispered. "Or mine." Her lips touched his neck, following a path along his jaw to his other ear. "And on the meeting table in Chapel, right on top of the carved Reaper." She bit his neck and her fingers glided further down, massaging his balls.

A moan escaped his lips. "That's... that's almost blasphemy," he uttered, softly panting.

She smirked. "I rather see it as the ultimate brotherly love."

"That's just gross," he said, but the thought of having sex on that table with her turned him on like crazy. "Fuck Alex, I want you. I want you so bad."

She laid a hand in his neck and gave him a surprisingly tender kiss. Her hand slipped inside his boxer briefs and he breathed in sharply as she folded her hand around him, slowly moving it up and down.

"How long do you think it has been since the last time I had sex?"

The day before yesterday, he thought, but he knew that violence had nothing to do with her idea of sex. "I have no idea," he muttered. "Half a year? Since you're pretending to be a man?"

"More than six years." Her fingers glided away from his boxer shorts. "So when I'm healed, you have to meet very, very high expectations."

Juice wanted her fingers around his member again, he even felt the urge to finish the job himself, but he resigned in the torture that was also a great feeling. "Six years..." he repeated, dazed. "How the hell did you do that?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Nice guys are just hard to find." She put down her knees on both sides of him and bent over to him, stroking his lips with her tongue. "So you should feel very, very special, Juice..."

He took a deep breath as she stretched his name. His hands found a route underneath her shirt again. At the moment his hands glided across her breasts, his phone went off.

With a grunt he laid back and touched for the device. "Yeah?" he answered grouchy.

"We're gonna take a vote within an hour," Chibs said.

A unpleasant sensation went through his body. "About... that rule?"

"That too. See ye soon."

With a sigh Juice hang up, the excitement of a few seconds ago was completely gone. He looked up to Alex, the playful expression had left her face as well.

"Well, seems the moment of truth awaits us," she said. Her hand glided to his cheek and she looked him right in the eye. "You'll be fine, Juice. Tonight we will laugh about the nervousness you feel now." She kissed his forehead and climbed off him.

With a sigh Juice left the bed as well. There was no way around this.