Nah, still don't own...maybe I should sic a pissed off Carlie and Bella on them....lol

Cevelle- The Red

They say freak,
When you're singled out,
The red, well it filters through.

So lay down, the threat is real,
When his sight goes red again.
Seeing red again,
Seeing red again.

This change, he won't contain,
Slip away, to clear your mind.
When asked, who made it show,
The truth, he gives in to most.

So lay down, the threat is real,
When his sight goes red again.

So lay down, the threat is real,
When his sight goes red again.
So lay down, the threat is real,
When his sight goes red again.

Seeing red again,
Seeing red again,
Seeing red again,
Seeing red again,
Seeing red again,
Seeing red again,
Seeing red again,
Seeing red....

They say freak.
When you're singled out.
The red, it filters through...

Part 37

Progress Through Epic Failure

(Carlie's POV)

I knew she wouldn't run, and I'm actually glad she didn't. Poor Rainne. I let loose on her big time. Fucking flashes dancing around the back of my head when I was talking to her didn't help. When I was ambushed by everyone after Rainne had went to bed last night just brought back into focus what I'd done to her. Three hours of sitting on the couch with my head in my hands while being bitched at by ones entire family does that to a person. The fucked up thing is that no one was upset about my warning, they were pissed about how it had been delivered. Yeah. Who said that Edward was the only one allowed to overreact to things?

Yeah, epic fucking fail on my part.

Embry understood why I had fired at her with both barrels, but that didn't stop him from refusing to look or speak to me after my tirade. I tried to apologize to him, he'd just nodded absently and asked me to stay away from both of them for a little while. I could see the hurt and disappointment in his eyes and it stabbed me in the heart. It kills me that I hurt one of my own. I've already talked to Carlisle this morning about the possibility of going back on my meds, but he's not sure if it would help or hinder the progress I have made without it. That's code for 'I don't have a fucking clue Carlie, so I'm going to have to run a shitload of tests on you to find out for sure.' Wonderful. I get to play the lab rat game again. Oh well, if that's what I have to do to prove that I'm sorry about what I did, then I'll do it. Gggrrr. Sometimes I hate not being the bad guy. At least then I'd have an excuse for this shit.

"Earth to Carlie, your coffee is getting cold love," Jake chides, pulling me from my self-loathing. I crack my neck and take a drink," Sorry, dreaming up ways to castigate myself in such a manner that proves once and for all that I truly am sorry about what I did to Rainne." He puts his empty plate in the dishwasher and starts the machine, "Have you thought about a simple 'I'm sorry, I screwed up' sweetheart?" I smack myself on the forehead, "Now, why didn't I think of that first? I knew there was a reason I keep you around, other than the mind blowing sex, of course." He sticks his tongue out at me, "Quit being such a ginormous bitch with new people all the time and you'd be able to avoid things like this more often." I roll my eyes," Embry wants me to steer clear of them for a few days and that's the least I can do after that shit last night. Oh, and I have to get more blood drawn after school today. I want to know if I need to go back on my medication." He comes around the island and takes my hand in his as he kneels beside me. "Your meds? Do you feel it's getting that bad again?" he asks, concern, fear, and love emanating from his dark orbs. I shrug one shoulder, "Not really, but it wouldn't hurt to be be sure, would it?" He tugs on my hood and plants a quick kiss on my lips, "Whatever you wish hun. I'm really proud of you, reaching out for help instead of sinking back into yourself again. That's real progress Carlie." He lays his forehead against mine, "Love you." I can't help but smile, "Love you more."

My open admittance to Jake about investigating the possible reinstatement of my antipsychotics to my daily routine ends up giving me a bigger reprieve with my family than my profuse apologizing. Rainne even ventures over to talk to me while we hang out in the parking lot before school. "So, you're really messed up, aren't you? You weren't doing all of that just to scare me." she asks matter-of-factly. I take a drag off of my menthol and nod, "Yeah I am. Technically I have a bad case of PTSD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and I have severe chronic depression. I also have really huge anger problems piled on top of abandonment issues. For a while there, Carlisle was beginning to worry that I was developing a personality disorder as well. I probably should have been institutionalized but they wouldn't have been able to help me without divulging the secret. That alone would have gotten me locked up for life, maybe longer." She leans against the Eclipse, "Does it ever get any easier? Keeping so many secrets, I mean." I shake my head, "No, you either grow strong enough to carry them or you get crushed under the weight. I'm not trying to scare you like last night, please believe me, but this really is a hard life. The ability to lie has to become second nature because it's not just your life on the line if you fuck up."

Rainne's quiet for a few minutes before shifting uncomfortably. I know she has more questions. "Spit it out Rainne," I finally say, "You're bouncing around like you have to take a piss or something." She picks at a string on the sleeve of too big flannel shirt that she's wearing, "Embry said to stay away from you when you're wearing that black hoodie. What does that mean?" I drop my smoke and grind it out, "It's a coping mechanism thing. When I'm wearing the hoodie, everyone knows that I'm having an off day and to give me my space but also to keep a close eye on me in case my idiocy takes over and I get it in my head to do something stupid. I also feel safe in it, most of the time. I don't like people looking at me on a good day, for a number of reasons, but on a bad day I could go apeshit and hurt someone for giving me a wrong look at the wrong time. It's happened before and no doubt will happen again." I can see the gears of her mind working as she absorbs all of this. Her visage becomes uncertain with the next question, "Is Bella like this too?" I shake my head, "Not to the extent that I am. Her mind works so much faster that it's able to handle everything better than mine."

The bell for class rings before she has a chance to ask any more questions. Our boys gather us up and escort us to class, something Rainne is still getting used to. She thought us girls were joking when we informed her that she would be escorted to every class from now one, whether it be one of us girls or one of the guys. None of us girls ever walked the halls alone, no matter how well we could take care of ourselves. I think the boys are just afraid one of us girls are going to go ballistic on someone without them to be around to enjoy it.

My day is ruined when I find out that the afternoon's classes have been cancelled in lieu of some stupid ass pep rally so I send a mass text informing everyone that I'm going to leave before the rally and anyone is welcome to join me. I even volunteer an afternoon of four-wheeling to sweeten the deal. By the time lunch rolls around and we gather at our tables, I have everyone's excuses forged and hand them out as they arrive. Rainne looks a little confused as I hand her the note. "What's this for?" I manage to keep a straight face, "We're ditching this afternoon and you need an excuse, don't you?" She inspects the piece of paper, "How did you do this? Aren't we going to attract attention by leaving together? And why are you suddenly being so nice to me?" I roll my eyes dramatically, "First off, I told you that I actually kind of like you and even if that wasn't true, you're Embry's girl and I love Embry. Second, no one really cares if we leave. You have to realize that a group as scary as we are, people actually feel relieved when we're somewhere else. Third, for those who are counting, I'll never reveal how those notes were made. Plausible deniability." Mischa laughs at that, "Don't let her bullshit you Rainne. Forging those things are so damn simple that we wouldn't use magic to do them at all if we didn't need to keep our asses out of the proverbial sling 24/7. And Carlie's not lying to you. People don't care why or how we're gone, just that we are and she really does like you or she wouldn't have tried so hard to scare you off last night, so stop freaking out."

Allen strolls up, his arm securely around Leah's waist, "I've got good news for my loving band of homicidal maniacs." Jake snorts, "If you tell us anything related to your sex life, I'm ripping off your nuts Allen, and if you tell me that you eloped, I'm going to have to kill you." Allen gives him the middle finger, "Up yours furball. No, I finally worked out the problems we were having shifting eye color. Leah's eye have been put through torture so I could perfect it, but now look at them." She steps forward, giving each of us investigate and sure enough, her ink black irises were now a soft, stunning, lavender. "Holy shit, that's so cool!" Seth exclaims. Bella chuckles, "Now it's my turn to play the guinea pig for phase two. We can start this afternoon, what do think Al?" Allen nods, "Yeah,anything you want Bells, just don't call me Al." Edward snickers, "Aw, what's wrong Al? Don't like people abbreviating your name? Payback's a bitch."

I look across the quad and catch an unusual sight, "Who's the blond chick with Quil?" Everyone catches a quickl glimpse before Seth answers, "That is Megan Marlow. She's a sophmore and has it bad for Quil. She's really sweet." Embry chuckles, "Yeah, if you like the type that blushes everytime you make eye contact and has a racist bastard as a father." Mischa half turns in her mates arms and growls, "Seth, is it that same motherfucker that cussed me out in the parking lot for my 'Goddess Bless' bumber sticker?" His face is solemn when he nods, "Yeah, that's him." Mischa smacks ehr hand off of the table, "I fucking hate racists! No good goat raping motherfuckers. I had enough of their shit in West Virginia when I lived there." I look at her, a little wide eyed, "Feel a bit strongly about the subject do we?" We're interrupted by Edward's laughter. "What's so fucking funny?" I ask increduously. "Big bad wicked witch Mischa is from West Virginia?! Now we know what's wrong with her!" he responds, doubled over in a fits of giggling.

Mischa looks to Allen, who shrugs noncommittally, "That's where my parents are from too Misch, so I always knew that's what was wrong with you." Bella chuckles, "Well, I guess that answers the enigma of whose parents live in Forks." Allen grins at her, his hazel eyes twinkling mischievously, "Are you sure about that?" Bella folds her arms to her chest and pouts, "Why do you keep doing that? It's not like any of us are going to have a problem with you either way." Allen shrugs, "Because you guys have overlooked the obvious." Bella cocks and eyebrow, "Oh? What's that?" Mischa makes a face, "Because they aren't either of our real parents. They were foster parents Bella. Why do you think they had no problem kicking us out? The money dipshit. As soon as the money stopped flowing to take care of us, they had been looking for a reason to get rid of us." Bella's pout immediately shifts to a mask of concern, "But you--her--a couple? Or cousins?" Allen and Mischa exchange a meaningful look and Allen rolls his eyes, but nods at her. Mischa sighs, "Not here. Too complicated. We'll talk at home. Just so you fuckers know, this wasn't a conversation we ever intended on having with any of you."

Conversation is deliberately steered in other directions as our family breaks off and makes their exits. We never leave all at once, if we can help it. we do attempt to maintain the illusion to be leaving for the reasons stated on the papers, even if it's only for the school's benefit. Rainne shocks the hell out of me by asking if her and Embry can catch a ride home with us since Quil isn't going back to the Den. Quil is still ditching, but told Jake in a text that he's taking Megan up to Port Angeles to wine and dine her a bit. I agree and keep my remarks to myself at Rainne's reactions to our racing home at incredible speed.

As we park the car, she pries her hands from Embry's arm. He is also doing his best to keep his face smooth. "Do all of you drive that that?" she asks. We nod simultaneously, fighting smirks. "You all might survive a crash at that speed, but I certain wouldn't." I light a cigarette and shake my head, "Nah, me, Allen, and Mischa would suffer every bit as horribly as you, we're simply used to having to keep pace with the others. Good thing we were all speed addicts beforehand though. Sorry Rainne, it's one more of those things you're going to have to learn to shoulder." As we walk in the house, I notice that we're the second ones home.

"Alice," I say in a bare whisper, "Is Quil going to bring his shiny new toy home with him?" I know she's here, her dainty blood red stilettos that she wore to school today are by the door. She ran home, no doubt. Rainne has a confused look on her face, "There is no way she could have heard that, vampire hearing or not." Just then, Jasper bounds in the back door, said evil pixie on his back. "No he's not. She's cute and all, but he doesn't want her knowing where the Den is just in case she turns out to be the stalker type." Rainne's jaw falls open and Jake nudges her, "What's the problem Rainne?" She starts and sputters a bit before choking out, "You can't tell me that you don't care that Quil is out there buttering a girl up so he can get laid!"

"Stop being such a baby Rainne," I chide, "every fucking teenager that's had sex has played that game. It's not like he is going to rape or drug her. In fact, he won't do a single thing she doesn't ask him to. Just because you and Embry are still at the teasing phase has no bearing on what the rest of us do." She glares at me, "And how do you know what we have and haven't done? I know he wouldn't tell you." I touch a finger to my temple, "Telepath, remember? I don't need to be a wolf to connect with Jake's mind and because Jake knows, I know." Her face turns a very pretty shade of pink, "Um, oh shit, um.." We laugh, "Besides the two other mind readers and Alice being psychic, everyone but the humans can hear what you two do up in your room. It's no big deal at this point. This family shares no secrets. Why do you think Allen and Mischa are finally spilling the last of theirs?"

The confused look is back, "But shouldn't everyone know already?" I shake my head, "No. They are very good at shielding their minds and we love them too much to try and dig through their heads without permission. You are a different matter. We are going to have to teach you how to shield because the four of us are constantly burning up energy to keep your mind shielded from everyone and everything. You actually have the potential to be a witch, we just have to figure out a way to trigger your awakening without traumatizing you too badly." Her eyes light up, "Would I be as powerful as you guys?" I shake my head sadly, "Sorry, but no. Almost everything you would do would require the aid of spell components. No lightning bolts or fireballs in your future kiddo, but I think coincidental magic might be right up your alley."

She follows me into the kitchen and I get drinks for everyone. "What's coincidental magic?" she finally inquires. I pull off my hoodie, adjust my tank top, and sit down, pretending not to notice her bold faced stare. Her eyes fall on the corset piercings on my forearms, they're laced with laced and lime green ribbons today. Jake picked the colors and re-laced them and the ones along my spine himself. "What are those? I've never seen anything like that." I run my fingers over them, "Corset piercings. Most people only get them on their back, which I also have, or their neck. A normal person can only have them a few months before their bodies start rejecting the metal and the hoops start shifting. One of the perks of being a witch is that I've been able to fix it so that these babies never shift and my body doesn't ever reject the metal."

I go for broke in an effort to prove that I can be trusted not to go off on her. I extend my arm so she can get a closer look. Timidly, she stretches her hand out and traces the ribbons with a finger. I do my best to ignore the instinct to yank my arm away and force the trembling to a minimum. I get back on topic to distract myself. "Coincidental magic is one of the easiest magicks to learn but the hardest to master," I continue with my little lesson," Imagine that you can't find your car keys in the morning and tell yourself what a coincidence it would be if they ended up being in your backpack. Now, you open said backpack and Bam! there are the missing keys. With me so far?" She offers a little smile and a nod. "Okay. That was an easy one. Something harder would be if you were in a hurry to get to school because you were late and try to force a coincidence like making all of the stop lights on your route to school turn green so you don't have to stop until you get there. There is a fine line that has to be balanced or that shit blows up in your face."

She doesn't answer for a long time, still quietly tracing the ribbons on my arms. "Too much info?" I ask. She shakes her head no, then looks up at me with an exasperated look on her face. "Why are you being so nice to me now after being such a psycho last night?" she damn near yells the question, "This shit is giving me whiplash!" I put my cigarette out and lean forward, "I fucked up last night and I'm sorry for that, but don't ever mistake me being mannerly with being nice. I am not a nice person Rainne. I ceased being a nice person a long time ago, go ask Lauren Mallory and the Skank Crew. You are Embry's imprint so that means you're family now too. I do my damnedest to protect my family but my psyche is still adjusting to having someone new in our little merry band of misfits so I can't help but be a little fucking bipolar with you. To tell you the truth, I don't figure Embry would be so happy with me being around you if Jake wasn't right here to keep a close eye on me." She gives me a look, "Why?" "Honestly? I don't do well with people. Trust issues. I have a tendency to freak out when I'm touched and yet I'm sitting here letting you play with my arms. I love Embry like a brother and it's been killing me that I upset him over what I said to you. I decided that something drastic was the only way to get him to realize how sorry I am, hence the touching. You are the first person to maintain any kind of contact with me other than our family since Bella and I were abducted last year. I'm feeling pretty damn smug about not flipping out over it."

Jake takes my other hand, "I think you've made your point sweetheart. Let's not tempt fate any more than we already have," he leans close to my ear, "I'm very proud of you for doing this. Love you." I smile and touch my head to his, "Love you more. Everyone here?" He laughs and pulls me to my feet, "Pulling up as we speak." I grab him and crush my lips to his passionately. Just as his hands touch my hips, I break away and dash into the lving room, leaving my werewolf to chase me. I hear him growl as I jump over the first couch and feel him grab me as we crash down onto the second, laughing like hyenas.

Jake is tickling me ruthlessly when the others enter the house. "Help me!" I squeal as he sticks his head under my shirt and begins blowing raspberries on my stomach. "I'll help!" Edward exclaims and dives over the back of the couch to grab my ankles and remove my boots. "You fucking fuctard! I'm going to turn you into a fucking vampire rabbit!" I scream as his cold fingers begin their torment on my feet. I try to get Jasper to help, but he turns traitor and finds the ticklish spots on my knees. After a few minutes and several threats of losing control of my bladder, they let me escape to the bathroom. I'm so glad that humans can't seem to find those spots like the vamps and wolves seem to. When I return to the living room, it is now full of people who are waiting to hear the tale of the Goth twins.

Bella and Alice are sprawled across the couch, their heads on Edward and Jake's laps. Jasper is on the floor, reclining against the arm of the couch. He opens his arms and offers a seat in his lap with a smile. I wink and sit down between his legs. He wraps his arms around my shoulders. "Heard what you did," he stage whispers, "I'm proud of you little sister," and kisses the top of my head. I relax against his cold chest, soothed by the quiet purr rumbling out of him. I can't help but note the look of surprise on Rainne's face when she notices the shift of seating partners. Jasper notices as well. "What?" he inquires, his southern drawl surfacing slightly, "I'm not allowed to sit with my little sister?" She blanches, "No, um, I thought you had difficulties with human blood?" He nods thoughtfully, "I still do from time to time, but I've gotten so desensitized to Nessie, Allen, and Mischa that their blood holds no interest for me now. You would be more in danger than her if the witches weren't blocking your scent from all of us right now." Everyone chuckles when she scoots herself closer to Embry, "Oh. Okay," she rasps, making us laugh harder.

Our bout of mirth at Rainne's expense dies down as Allen and Mischa sit on the coffee table that has been moved in front of the television. They look nervous and a little fearful until I feel Jasper release a wave a calm and confidence into the room. Allen mouths a thanks and Jasper responds with a shrug and a grin. He lays his chin on my shoulder as Allen begins.

"Okay, this whole thing is going to seem really fucked up and I won't be surprised if you are disgusted with us for a while after this. We just want everyone to know now because with this Volturi shit hanging over our heads, we don't know if we'll get another chance," he states after lighting a smoke, "Please just keep in mind that we had no idea in the beginning."He takes a drag off of his cigarette and sits quiet for a few minutes. Mischa takes his hand and squeezes as she gives him a questioning look. He bobs his head and keeps his eyes to the floor as he begins.

"Mischa and I used to be a couple, yes that's true, but we haven't been for a long time. Not since we found out that we're brother and sister."

Oh shit.

Definitely did not see that one coming.

He then explains to us that both of them came from military families and that Allen was concieved when his mother and Mischa's dad had a one night stand. Evidently, her husband was overseas and Mischa's dad was at their base for training. They met at a bar and after a few too many drinks, drown their loneliness in each other. One night and one mistake. She had snuck out after he went to sleep and never saw her again during his stay. A few days later, her husband came home and no one was the wiser.

Mischa's mother conceived her within weeks of the tryst. When Allen's dad was transferred to the same base as Mischa and her family many years later, fate had a sense of humor and the two became a couple within days of meeting at school. They were 15 and in love. A tragic accident changed all of that. Allen's mother was driving the young couple to a nearby shopping mall and they were hit by a tractor trailer that jack-knifed on the highway, killing his mother instantly and left the couple pinned in the backseat for three hours. When they were finally cut out of the wreckage, they'd been taken to the hospital via ambulance and a whole array of testing was done and the forgotten affair was brought back to the forefront.

Allen and Mischa were still in the hospital when they recieved news of the murder-suicide of their parents. Mischa's mother had used her husband's hunting rifle to shoot and kill both men, who had been in her living room arguing, before killing herself with a revolver. Allen was whisked away back to Seattle by his dad's family and Mischa was forced into the system. Within a month's time, Allen's wealthy grandparents terminated any rights when they discovered that Allen was not, biologically, their sons child, and Allen became another statistic.

When a foster family who supposedly specialized in dealing with grief-stricken kids offered to take Allen, the state didn't think twice about it. Allen soon found out that they were more concerned about the monthly check that they received for him that his welfare and he began to plot. He managed to reconnect with Mischa over the Internet and told her of his plan to get his foster family to agree to take her in. Luckily, it worked and by the time both of them were sixteen (Allen on Halloween and Mischa in mid November), they were both semi-comfortably living in Forks Washington.

Allen and Mischa admit to having a few intimate encounters, even after knowing their lineage, but broke it off when Allen began dating a guy from Seattle the summer before Bella and I moved here. Things changed for them after that, but they are still very dear to one another.

"So, there you have it," Allen says, then empties his bottle of Pepsi in a single gulp. Mischa's eyes scan the room warily, taking in our reactions. "Let me guess, now is where the jokes about West Virginians and incest come into play?" she spits, unshed tears making her hazel green robs shimmer. "First fucking person to do that I'm going to break their jaw," I snarl, "then I just might gut them Misch." Jasper gives me quick squeeze and drops his arms so I can embrace my adopted sister and brother, "I love you no matter what, and I will never think ill of you because of this," I vow as I hold them tight.

"Wait a second," Seth interjects, "Allen dated a guy? I thought you were in love with Leah?" Allen chuckles as the girl in question wraps her arms around his shoulders and gives him a quick kiss. "Um, dude, Allen's bi," I explain, "I thought everyone knew. Why do you think Leah is smiling so big when they get back from one of their weekend getaways? She's spent the whole time getting it from two cocks instead of just one." Leah smacks my arm, "You're just jealous Nessie." I shake my head, "Nah, one guy is bad enough, but dragging off one of you girls from time to time is awfully fun though. Um Mischa, Seth looks like he's either going to cream is jeans or faint again."

Edward starts laughing, "You think that's funny, look at Emmett, he hasn't moved and I think smoke is starting to come out of his ears. His poor brain is working so hard to figure it out." We all turn to look and sure enough, Emmett's mouth is hanging open and he has a finger pointed at Allen. "What's wrong Emmett? Looking to sign up?" Allen taunts. Suddenly Emmett springs to his feet, "Dude! What? When? You bat for both teams? When did that happen?" Allen shrugs, "I've always been like this, didn't think it was a big deal." Emmett's face takes on an even further perplexed expression, "You're not going to start dressing in drag and build an alter to Cher or anything are you?" Allen shakes his head, "I don't have the body for drag and I can't stand Cher." Emmett scratches his head and huffs, "You're my best friend and you never thought to tell me you have a thing for the salami? Not that I have a problem with it man, but still!"

Allen drags Emmett to talk in private and after Mischa gets a round of hugs from us, we venture outside to have some fun. Allen and Mischa's reasoning for their confession aren't lost on us. We know we are running out of time for things like just being together and enjoying ourselves. Later on we'll practice, but for now, we're just a bunch of crazy teenagers who happen to be part of the best family anyone could ask for.

*wipes forehead and grabs a Sam Adams Cherry Wheat* Phew! Confessions take a lot out of you, you know?

We're getting closer to the attack on the Volturi...just trying to work it out in my head

Something that helps is lots of reviews so....

REVIEW OR DIE!