36. Something Old, Something New
"I love you," he said for the first time in years. "And you don't have to say anything, because I'll wait however long for you. I just want you to know that I love you." Aria leaned into him, inhaling his ever-present scent of sandalwood. She finally felt truly safe in his arms, knowing that he understood everything now. He was right. She wasn't ready to say those words, but she was ready to hear them. And she was glad she did, because it was just what she needed. And she loved him too.
Someone was trying to break down the door, he was sure of it. But frankly, he didn't care. All he wanted was to go back to his deep peaceful slumber. He was just starting to drown out the maddening thumps, when a familiar voice called out his name. He covered his ears with a pillow, grunting. The pounding grew louder, and some not very nice demands to open the door were heard. Reluctantly, he threw his blanket aside and got up to answer the door.
"What is wrong with you? You're bothering the neighbors. If you had gone on for another minute, they would've come out," Ezra said grumpily, slightly slurring his words half asleep. As expected, Hardy stood on his doorstep with a wide grin plastered across his stupid, sleep depriving face. Without so much as a word, he walked past Ezra and into the apartment.
"See, I knew you were still asleep. Work is in less than an hour and you're not even showered yet! I can't keep coming here everyday, man." Hardy was getting sick of this pity party. Ezra needed to get off his ass and do something. Hardy had been checking up on him to make sure that he gets out of bed, every morning for the past two weeks. He always came at least half an hour before work started for Ezra, because he knew that the poor guy would still be wallowing in his sorrows until he arrived.
"Relax, I already took a shower." Ezra rolled his eyes, heading to the small part of his apartment he often referred to as the kitchen. He grabbed two mugs from the wooden cabinet and filled them up with black coffee, dumping a teaspoon of sugar in his own and two in Hardy's.
"Really?" Hardy dropped his messenger bag on the couch, obviously not believing his friend. "Then tell me why you're still in only your pajama pants."
Ezra sighed before answering, "I didn't exactly sleep last night. I was still up this morning so I took a shower. After that I was so sleepy so I just crashed." He placed Hardy's cup of coffee on the dining table, and gulped down half of his own.
"You can't keep staying up all night just thinking about Aria. Either you go talk to her or move on. She wrecked you so many times already, you can't keep doing this to yourself," Hardy gave him the stink eye. Before Ezra could say anything, he was already back on command mode. "Go get dressed, we're leaving in twenty." Ezra obliged, not feeling like arguing with Hardy. The coffee hadn't kicked in yet so he figured he could start talking after he got ready for work. Ezra went into the bathroom and put on the usual shirt-tie combo, haven't been using his vest in a while. When he got out, the scent of bacon and scrambled eggs wafted in the air. Hardy had been cooking for him every time he came over, which meant every day. Apparently he was worried that Ezra hadn't been eating.
"Eat," Hardy ordered, shoving a plate of his cooking in front of Ezra and placed his own across from it. They both took a seat, and started on the meal. Ezra felt like he was back to living with his mother in junior high, on mornings before school when she wouldn't take no for an answer every time he tried to leave without breakfast.
"You know, in the mornings, couples usually eat pancakes," Ezra joked, after gobbling up spoonfuls of breakfast. He had to admit, Hardy's cooking was pretty good. He wondered where this secret talent was when they were in college living off of instant noodles.
"Yeah well, too bad you're single now."
"Not exactly," Ezra half mumbled behind his mug. Hardy slowly looked up from his plate, first furrowing his eyebrows then taking a deep breath. "Please don't start." He knew the guy had always hated it when Ezra got involved with Aria, especially when he got hurt. A few months ago when they got back together, he had audibly sighed and then changed the subject. Ezra said that everything was going to be fine, nothing like last time –a.k.a. falling into a pit of heartbreak– was going to happen. And then it did. Hardy didn't hate Aria, that was for sure. What he hated was seeing Ezra get hurt by her. And in his eyes, as long as the two recklessly got together, which was the only way they do, it was inevitable.
"Tell me what happened," Hardy dropped his eating utensils on the plate, producing a loud clanking. Ezra wrapped up what happened last night when Aria came over, in five minutes. After they talked, Aria had stayed for the night. The two stayed up talking, and she left early this morning because of an early class. That's why Ezra hadn't gotten any sleep. "So you guys are good now?"
"Pretty much," Ezra slowly nodded. Hardy still had a sour look on his face, his arms folded in front of his chest. "Look, it's for good now. You don't have to worry about anything."
"That's what you always say," Hardy got up and dumped their empty plates in the sink, before downing the rest of his coffee.
"Well this is for real," Ezra said annoyed, although he knew that Hardy was just looking out for him. Hardy sighed loudly, put both mugs next to the dishes, and then grabbed his bag.
"Come on, you're driving me." Hardy could already feel his head hurting from the next time Ezra does something stupid and wreck this thing with Aria. He didn't need some other fool with driving problems to add to his headache. Ezra complied, grabbing his own messenger bag and keys, right behind his friend.
Aria fished out her keys from her bag, and unlocked the door as quietly as she could. It was early, and Spencer would most likely still be asleep. Or at least she hoped so. She didn't know if she felt like rehashing all of last night right now, because she knew Spencer would get it out of her. She loved the woman, but the fact that she could make Aria do anything, frustrated her sometimes. Although she was one to talk, since she often guilt tripped Spencer into doing her favors. Anyway, even if Spencer was awake, she didn't want to wake up Abby. She slowly pushed the door open, expecting to see a dim living room with drawn curtains. Instead, she was greeted with a flood of bright lights. She had to squint a little, since it was such a contrast to the outside world that still had a morning gray over the town.
"Where the hell have you been?!" Hanna's voice rang in her ears. Once her eyes had adjusted to the light, she could see Hanna standing in front of her with her arms on her hips, Emily on a stool with wide concerned eyes, and Spencer in the kitchen making French toast for everyone. Apparently the whole gang was here, except for— The bathroom door opened and walked out Caleb, who let out a worried sigh when his eyes landed on Aria.
"Did you send out a search party for me or something?" Aria raised her eyebrows at Spencer, who had just cracked an egg. She was grateful for how much her friends cared about her, but this was a bit of an over reaction.
"Aria, we didn't know where you were," Emily's voice was stern, her signature for when she was worried about you. "You didn't leave a note and you weren't answering any of our calls. Considering you haven't as much as crack a smile in the last few weeks except for when Abby was around, we were just hoping that you weren't doing something stupid," she raised her voice, showing just how much she was scared that something had happened.
"I'm sorry, okay? My phone must have died. Besides, I was gone for a few hours," Aria dropped her bag on the couch, and joined Emily on a stool. "I'm sorry," she comforted Emily with a pat on her arm. She thought that would be it, but everyone was still tense.
"Aria, you were gone the whole night," Spencer said through gritted teeth. She cracked another egg against the mouth of a bowl, harder this time out of frustration. Aria flinched at the sight. Why couldn't Aria see that they had truly worried about her? Spencer had gone to the bathroom at two this morning, and checked up on Aria just to see if she was still up. When she found her bed empty, she called the other girls to see if she had gone over to their place but no one knew where she was. Everyone ended up gathered at the loft, pacing the floor back and forth without any idea where to find her. They called Hardy and even Ezra, but neither answered.
"I said I'm sorry, I didn't think it was a big deal. I just went out for a while." Aria sighed, and turned to Caleb for back up. She widened her eyes at him, hoping that he would jump to her defense at any moment. But instead, he gave her a long, hard look.
"In the words of my wife, 'Where the hell have you been?!'" Caleb didn't surrender to Aria's puppy dog eyes, which were begging for help. She grunted and turned her away from Caleb, facing Spencer. The woman was now taking out ten slices of bread, and pilling them onto a large oval plate.
"Fine," Aria held up both hands, giving up. "I was wrong, I should've left a note or something. But look, now that I'm here aren't you guys glad?" She attempted an awkward smile. "Can't we just hug it out or something?" She spread out her arms, hoping that someone would finally soften up.
"Aria," Caleb said slowly.
"Thank you, I knew you weren't going to leave me hanging." She got up and walked towards the only man in the room, going for a hug. But before she could actually wrap her arms around him, he pushed her away.
"What's on your finger?" Caleb asked cautiously, though his eyes were dancing with disbelief. Aria realized that he must've been talking about the ring, which she still had on. It must've looked like what it first did to Aria—an engagement ring.
"What are you talking about?" Aria tried to play dumb, not really sure how to explain everything. She was eventually going to have to talk about it, but she was hoping it wasn't going to be this morning. She was already so tired, and she still had a morning class. Obviously, the possibility of postponing talking to her friends was out the window the second she saw everyone here.
"For God's sake, Aria." Spencer slammed a pair of tongs against the marble counter, and Aria winced. She knew exactly the conclusions the girls had clearly jumped too, since she did so herself upon seeing the ring just last night. "Please tell me you didn't do something stupid like elope."
"What?!" Aria swiveled around, her hair swishing about. Apparently, Spencer hadn't arrived to the same conclusions Aria had. Her train of thoughts led to even worse scenarios. "No!" She immediately squashed the idea before it grew and freaked her out even more.
"Then what in the world is the blinding diamond on your ring finger?" Hanna demanded.
Aria felt like everyone was ganging up on her, and she needed some space. She walked to the couch and slumped onto it, looking down at her ring. With a bashful smile that she tried her best to hide, she said, "I went to see Ezra."
"And what, he proposed?" Hanna continued with her absurd tone, spinning on her heel to see Aria's face. "Oh my god, and you said yes. Didn't you? That's why you have the ring on and that goofy grin!" She sounded like she just broke a criminal case, her own hand that was decorated with every girl's best friend covering her mouth.
"You're right, Hanna." Aria rolled her eyes, and answered sarcastically. "After a few moths of dating, breaking up because I had commitment issues and felt like things were going too fast, I accepted a sudden proposal when I went to see him on a whim. Will you be my maid of honor?"
"Yes!" Hanna squealed, jumping up and down.
"I knew I should've said something last time I saw him. Then this would never have happened," Caleb started muttering. "That stupid son of a–"
"What is wrong with you two?!" Aria gasped, not believing that they actually bought it. "I was being sarcastic. You're perfect for each other, you know that?" Aria slipped out of her boots, and folded her legs underneath herself. She really was tired. She had left Ezra's place so early to make sure that she could get a shower in before class, but now she was considering skipping class altogether.
"Aria, just tell us what happened," Emily said in a more sympathetic manner, realizing that this approach would get Aria to open up better. She got up and took a seat on the other end of the long couch, giving Aria a reassuring smile. Aria grabbed the blanket Abby used to use when she was a baby, which was draped on the armrest, and covered her legs as she stretched them out in front of her. Leaning on her side on the soft cushion, she told everyone about the ring and why it had a diamond a.k.a. Ezra's 'Plan to save it for whenever he was going to propose' story.
"We ended up just talking all night." Aria shrugged, and a smile found its way onto her face. "I'm sorry I had you guys worried sick. I really am." She looked up at her friends' caring faces, feeling really lucky to have such amazing friends. She didn't know what she did to deserve them. For all she knew, she didn't. Deserve them, that is.
"So, what now? You guys are back to being a happy little family?" Caleb asked cynically. He didn't mean for it to sound so mean, but Aria had to admit that it stung. She knew that Caleb had never been aboard the Ezra and Aria train since he hadn't seen how much the two fought to be together from the start, how their love really did conquer all—almost. But she thought he was at least warming up to the idea of them. Hell, even Mike was fine with them now.
"To be fair, we never were a 'happy little family'," Aria said bitterly, which earned a sigh from Caleb. She didn't know if it was a guilty sigh or an apologetic one or simply out of irritation, but it was obvious that he hadn't meant to hurt her with what he said. "We're just seeing how things go, taking it one step at a time." Aria ran a finger along the elaborate carvings of her ring, a habit she had picked up from the first time Ezra had given it to her all those many years ago. It was nice to have something old and familiar to hold onto, and yet sparklingly new. "Only this time, we're in it for the long haul. So we're taking it slow." Aria tried to force out a soft laugh, "I mean, we've done the whole baby thing right?" she referred to Abby, spreading her mouth into an awkward grin.
"Aria," Spencer started, Aria's joke falling flat. "Have you guys even talked about everything? Because you cannot bottle up your feelings and neither can he. Your fight was because of that and I'm not going to let your get hurt by this again. Neither of you." She had joined Emily and Caleb in the living room, leaving the French toast behind. She made a point of looking Aria dead in the eyes, knowing that she would know if the woman was lying.
"Trust me, everything's out in the open. We talked for hours and we're never going back to that…" Aria struggled to find a word for the destructive behavior of throwing every issue that surfaced to the back burner, and finally settled with, "phase." The room stayed silent, except for the sound of Hanna's heels against the wooden floors as she walked across the room. She had been hanging back by the unfinished breakfast supporting a disapproving look, but was now finally only a coffee table away from Aria.
"Are you sure you guys know what you're doing?" Hanna sighed, realizing that it wasn't like there was anything they could do. Besides, everyone knew Ezra loved Aria and that the two were meant to be together even if it hurt them. It had always been like that, some kind of twisted fate that was written in the stars. Aria gave a faint nod, her eyes full of hope for Hanna's support. "Then I'll be your maid of honor when that ring actually turns into an engagement ring," her tight smile broke into a genuine one. Aria couldn't help but let out a laugh, jumping up and catching the blonde in a tight hug.
"Thanks, Han," she whispered into Hanna's hair. "Really." Letting go, she looked around at everyone else in the room. Their body language suggested that they had given up on arguing on the matter, but silence still hung in the air. Emily gave a small smile, letting out a breath in approval. Caleb just rolled his eyes, and plopped down next to Emily on the couch. "Spence?"
"Go shower. You have a class, right?" Spencer ordered, her usual way of letting something go. Aria mouthed a 'Thank You', but didn't move let alone leave for the bathroom.
"Actually, I was thinking about not going," Aria bit her bottom lip, already sensing Spencer's frown forming. But before she could complain, Aria beat her to it, "I just want to have a girls' day, please? Ella's taking Abby to school,–" it was Thursday– "we were going to have girls' night anyway, and all of you are here already. We can also help you pack, Spence."
"Oh, don't worry about me. I'll pack some other time. It's not like I move tomorrow," Spencer faked a laugh and averted her eyes from meeting anyone's gaze, wrapping her arms around herself. She'd been trying to avoid packing for weeks. "But sure, we'll have a girls' day." She thought that going along with what Aria wanted would at least take the attention off of her and her little issue.
"Um, Spence?" Caleb spoke up. "You move next month. And you haven't even packed a single piece of clothing." She and Hardy had finally found a perfect place in New York, but they had to already be living there in thirty days. Everything with the office worked out fine but Spencer had been having trouble picking up a box and throwing her whole life into it, starting to really rethink the situation she had somehow ended up with. When she had taken time to actually think about her decision, it seemed rash and… just plain terrifying. "Is this about Hardy?" Spencer shook her head, looking down at her cuticles and picking on them. It really wasn't. Everything was going fine with him. Great, even. She just couldn't imagine her life without the constant day-to-day nagging of her girls, or Abby's uncontrollable laughs in the morning that would always somehow brighten up her day.
"I just… I'll miss you guys." Spencer joined Caleb on the couch, sighing. "I'll miss Abby," her eyes started to pool with tears. "I'll even miss your stupid husband, Hanna." She nudged the man in the ribs with her elbow, who feigned physical pain. "I'll miss this loft with its stupid front door that never lets you see who's out front from anywhere else but right by the door–" which had actually caused so much trouble, including Mike's little temper tantrum that ended up with Hardy supporting a black eye– "And I'll miss stupid fucking Rosewood," she finished with a laugh of disbelief. Missing Rosewood! There's something she thought she'd never say.
"Hey, we're still going to see each other every Thursday. You promised, remember?" Aria sat on Spencer's armrest. "Besides, Abby and I will visit all the time. Especially with Ezra and Hardy being friends. Do you really think those two can be separated that easily?" Aria half-joked, earning a laugh from Spencer. "And we can't either, not even with Caleb."
"Wow, guys. Really feeling the love here," Caleb said sarcastically. "Everything will be fine," he took Spencer's hand in his own, giving her a reassuring smile. "Okay?" She just nodded, after taking a deep breath.
"Now, come on. Let's pack." Emily got up and offered Spencer a hand, to help her up. "After that we can plan your going away party."
"You guys are throwing me a party?" Spencer's eyes lit up, and she brushed away the few shed tears.
"Did you really think we were going to let you leave without a party?!" Hanna gasped in disbelief, sounding offended. "What kind of friends do you think we are?" Spencer couldn't help but grin in excitement, letting out an exhilarated laugh. She finally took Emily's hand and got to her feet, pulling Caleb up with her. She gave her friends grateful smiles, knowing that words weren't needed. Aria may be blind when it came to love, Hanna might be slowly losing it with all the changes, and Emily may have the most unpredictable future ahead, but she knew that at the end of the day, they'd be there for her. And she'd be there for them too. Even Caleb was a part of the family.
Hanna reached down and took off her heels, which she sloppily dropped by the couch. She then put her hair up in a messy bun with a hair tie, before plastering on the most enthusiastic smile anyone had ever seen on the blonde. "Now, where are those boxes?"
So tell me what you think of this chapter! Thank you so much for the positive response I got for the last chapter. It's great to see that I haven't lost my readers!
Reply to Elizabeth: No, Aria and Ezra are not engaged. Thanks for the review!
Reply to Chloe: Sorry about the long wait, I realize that a lot of the readers might have trouble remembering what happened in previous chapters. You're welcome to ask any questions through reviews or private messages. Thanks for reviewing!
Reply to EzriaFan01: Thank you so much for the awesome review! Don't worry, I end up rambling all the time when I'm excited too.
As always, thank you for reviews/follow/favorites. Keep them coming! I see a lot of new readers, and I'm so glad that you guys are enjoying this story. Love you all xo