The True Alpha: The EJ Black Chronicles
Chapter 34: Venezia Act Two
Leah's POV
"EJ, I . . ." I peer up at him, my heart pounding like a hammer within my chest. I feel my tears begin to dissipate with just one look into his emerald eyes.
"Shhh. I know." EJ places his hands on either side of my face, gently stroking away the moisture with his thumbs. The warmth of his fingers touching my skin sends ripples down my spine.
A myriad of emotions floods my heart, and I don't know what I should say to him at the moment. I can't let his touch overwhelm me so. He has hurt me deeply over the past few days, and I'm not quite ready to forgive him. I have so many things I need to tell him, so many things he needs to understand.
For starters, I do love him . . . I just don't know if that alone is enough to make me stay.
I smile up at him, wrapping my arms around him and letting the warmth of his body soothe me.
"I love you too, Leah."
My eyes widen with amazement as EJ speaks that simple little phrase. My heart instantly breaks for the man in my arms. He is unconditionally and hopelessly in love with me.
"I know you do, EJ." I pull away from him, looking down at my hands. "It's just . . . it's . . ."
Suddenly, the lobby begins to overrun with a steady stream of audience members. The musical must have just paused for an intermission. Some of the onlookers stop briefly in front of us with concerned looks on their faces, murmuring something in Italian.
"Is there somewhere we can go to talk?" I glance at EJ; his eyes are still focused on my face. "You know, somewhere private?"
"Of course." EJ stands up, offering me his hand, and I place my right hand in his.
Fleeing the crowded lobby, EJ leads me down the corridor to our private box. Once inside, EJ closes the crimson, velvet curtain and scoops me up into his arms.
"Where are we going, EJ?" I ask as he pulls me closer to his chest.
"You'll see. It's a secret place." EJ responds, pressing his lips to my forehead. His sweet gesture makes me smile, but also a little apprehensive.
I close my eyes, and seconds later, I find myself being gently lowered to the ground. I hear the hum of the city streets below. I feel the wind kiss my cheeks, and I realize that we are now outside, high above the city on a rooftop.
"We're still at the theater?" I glance around, noticing the glow of the tower from Saint Mark's Square off in the distance.
"Yes, we're on the roof." EJ walks up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, and presses his chest against my back.
I sigh, feeling torn between the desire to return his affection and the desire of my heart to divulge the words I need him to hear.
"EJ, don't." I grab his arms and force them to release from my body.
I take several steps forward, watching the twinkling of the city lights and marveling in the splendors of Venice at night.
"Leah, please . . ." I feel the warmth of his body draw closer to me, his wonderful scent of roses permeating my nose. "Please love me."
"EJ . . ." I close my eyes and take a deep breath. It must be so hard for him, having these strong desires for me when he doesn't fully comprehend them. I find it difficult to control my own urges sometimes. "We need to talk."
"Anything you want, Leah." He replies, his expression hopeful.
I turn around and face him, my pulse racing rapidly all the way into my ears.
"What you did was inexcusable, EJ." I tell him, feeling my stomach tie itself into knots.
"I know." EJ's face strains, and I know I have caused him great pain. "I wish I could go back and change it."
"I wish that too, EJ, but you can't." I look away from him, turning my body to the side. "I wish the Volturi had never come to Forks. I wish . . . a lot of things . . ."
"You wish you hadn't come back to La Push." EJ glances down at the ground beneath us as the words escape his mouth. It is more of a statement than a question.
"Honestly, EJ . . ." I begin, not sure if I want to tell him what I'm truly feeling, but he needs to know. "Some part of me does."
He doesn't speak, and I watch him start to shake violently. I force myself to be strong. I can't let him persuade me into holding back my feelings.
"You have to look at it from my perspective." I continue, fighting the lump rising in my throat. "I come home after two years away from my family--engaged, happy, thinking I finally had it all together--just to have my nephew imprint on me. It totally turned my world upside down."
EJ is still silent, loosening his tie and staring at the ground.
"I was blown away, and first thing I thought of was Jackson—how hurt he would be if I told him it was over." I cross my arms over my chest to invite warmth. "Sam did the same thing to me when he imprinted. I just couldn't bear the thought of hurting someone else in the same way he hurt me."
EJ walks up beside me, placing his hands on top of the stone barrier in front of us, and looks off at the city below. His body is still shaking, and I hope he doesn't phase right here for all the world to see.
"EJ, say something." I put my hand on his left shoulder, and he flinches, almost growling at me. I draw back my hand in caution.
"You told me when we were together that night, Leah, that you loved me, that you felt the pull to me, that you knew we were meant to be together." EJ's voice is harsh. I've never seen him so angry before, and it begins to scare me. "I gave you everything that night, Leah. I gave you my life, my heart, my body, everything."
He huffs and paces away from me, removing his jacket.
"I know you did, EJ." I follow him, needing him to hear me out. "And then Nahuel kidnapped me. He held me prisoner for five days, EJ. FIVE DAYS! Do you have any idea what that was like? Knowing that my family thought I was dead? Thinking that I had lost them forever? Not knowing if I was going to live or die?"
"Yes, I do, Leah." EJ walks back up to me, tossing his jacket onto a small bench. "I was taken away too. Remember?"
I gulp, realizing that he did know what I went through. He knows the horror of being held captive by terrifying monsters, of not knowing whether he was going to survive or perish, not knowing if he would ever see me or his family again. I regret my words the second I detect the sadness in his eyes.
"I'm sorry." I whisper, turning my back to him. "I wasn't thinking."
"No, I'm sorry." I feel his arms around my waist, and I involuntarily lean back into him. "I can't believe I lashed out at you like that. You've been through so much these past few weeks. I shouldn't have overreacted."
"It's ok, EJ." I sigh, letting down my defenses, and allow myself enjoy his arms wrapped around me. "You've endured a lot too. It must've have been so horrifying, being with that bastard Aro and forced to drink human blood."
"Just thinking of you got me through it." He whispers into my ear, and I feel it all the way to my knees.
I immediately pull away before I do something I'll regret.
"Then, why did you cheat on me, EJ?" I ask him point blank, staring into his jade-colored eyes, searching for a valid reason. "How could you sleep with someone else when I was all you could think about?"
"Leah, I was weak." He deflects his eyes from mine. "The night we were together was the first time I had ever been with a woman, the first time I ever had desires to sleep with anyone. I found that the more I drank human blood, the more powerful those desires became. I found it harder and harder to resist."
"You should have been stronger." The words come out a little harsher than I intend.
"You're right, I should have." EJ returns his arms to my waist. "But I'm here now, and I promise you, that will never happen again."
"You know." I deny him again, strolling toward the opposite side of the roof. "I asked Sam once if he ever thought of the nights we shared together, and he told me he honestly couldn't remember them. His bond to Emily is that strong. How come yours wasn't strong enough to resist those women?"
"I don't know." EJ says, watching me walk up to a stone statue of a horse and trace the indentations with my fingers. "Dad wondered that too."
"Hmm . . . I wonder if because you are the Alpha now, you can choose whomever you want to be with." I try to make sense of his betrayal. "Maybe, your imprinting on me is null and void, and you have a choice now."
"Leah, how could you say something like that?" I see the hurt in EJ's eyes.
I really shouldn't have said that, but it has been weighing on my heart all day. I wonder if it could be true.
"It caused me physical pain to know that I slept with those women and that I would have to confess it to you. It literally broke my heart in two."
"Let's face the facts, EJ." I attempt to make him understand. "Your father never touched another woman again after he imprinted on Nessie, and believe me, he was tempted. I was his Beta, EJ, and I knew everything he went through. He fought temptation more that you would believe."
"Really?" EJ doesn't even look at me; his eyes are completely glazed over. "He never faltered once?"
"Never." I shake my head at him and continue. "And Quil, too. He waited sixteen years for Claire. Never once did he sleep with another woman."
EJ sighs, running his hands through his coal-black hair. The light from the moon reflects in his eyes, and I feel my breathing hitch in my throat. Even with the sadness radiating from his face, he has never looked more gorgeous in his life. I frown, forcing myself to look away.
"Maybe, we made a mistake that night, EJ." My heart shatters as I speak those words, but they need to be told. "Maybe, we should have taken things slower. I'm sorry I led you on."
"So, in other words, you're sorry you're carrying my child?" My soul follows my heart, violently crashing as rubble at my feet with his words.
"Damn it! That's not what I meant, EJ!" I put my hands on my forehead and run them down the length of my face. I let my arms fall to my belly, feeling the weight of my words settle on my shoulders. I could never regret creating the life resting beneath my palms.
"Then, what did you mean?" EJ is standing right beside me now, his eyes furious.
I inhale deeply and take several steps away from him.
"What I meant was that we should have taken things slower. You were just a child, EJ. I took advantage of the situation." I watch his face to gauge his reaction, and his expression is unreadable, blank.
"I'm not a CHILD, Leah!" Suddenly, EJ's face is right in mine, his hot breath on my face. Then, he recoils, taking a seat on a bench to the right of where I am standing.
"Well . . . maybe I am."
"No, EJ." I kneel in front of him, placing my hands on top of his. He immediately takes them into his palms. "You are not a child anymore. You are very much a man. All these experiences you have endured have matured you. I can see it in your eyes."
"I just feel so confused by what you're saying, Leah." EJ begins to cry, and I feel the ever-growing need to comfort him. "I love you. I only want to be with you. Imprint or no imprint, you are the one I'm meant to be with. I choose you."
I take a few seconds and let what he has just said sink in. Of course, he feels this way. I know he loves me, but can I forgive him? Will I ever be able to forgive him?
"EJ, being with you is just too difficult for me." His eyes look up at me, heartbroken. "I have been kidnapped twice, cheated on, lied to, almost murdered, the life of my unborn child at stake. It's just too risky, too dangerous, to be with you."
"What the fuck, Leah?" EJ removes his palms from my hands and stands up, retrieving his coat. "I have done nothing but protect you since you've been here, and this is how you repay me? By telling me it's too dangerous to be around me?"
I nod, placing my head in my hands, stifling back the tears I feel creeping out the corners of my brown eyes.
"Then, why are you even here with me now?" EJ's body is vehemently quaking once again. "Why don't you just go back to Washington and be with Jackson?"
"Actually." I rise and face him, gulping down my fear. "I called him on my cell when you were in the shower earlier this evening."
"What?" His eyes are filled with shock. "Leah, no, please . . ."
"I told him I was sorry for everything and told him about the baby." I close my eyes and continue. "And he told me he didn't care, and he still wants to marry me."
"Who cares what he wants?" EJ takes my hand into his. "What do you want, Leah?"
"It's simple, EJ. I have to think of our daughter—what's best for her." I tell him, looking down at our hands entwined together. "I can't put her in danger anymore."
EJ drops my hand and weakly crumbles to the ground, falling to his knees. He shouts obscenities at the top of his lungs and forcefully pounds his fists into the stone ground. The stone cracks and collapses underneath the force of his palms, dust flying all about his tear-soaked face.
"I'm so sorry, EJ." The floodgates open, and I begin to sob uncontrollably.
God, I am such a bitch! This conversation has definitely not gone the way I intended.
I start to comfort to him, but he holds up his hands in protest.
"Just leave me alone, Leah." I hear him whimper, his anger paramount. "Just leave me alone. I won't bother you anymore. Go back to your husband."
EJ's words cut me deep, but I deserve every one of them. I hate to leave him like this, but maybe it is for the best . . .
With a heavy heart, I turn and begin to make my way from the roof of the Teatro la Fenice, tears streaming relentlessly down my face.
EJ's POV
The dust settles around me, and I feel like my world has crumbled down upon me. Leah has denied me for her fiancé once again, and I feel almost as if I can't breathe.
I gasp for air, welcoming it into my lungs, as I hear the faint sounds of her heels carry her farther and farther away from me.
Searing, sharp pains resonate deep within my being, and I instantly regret my words. I need her like a heart needs a beat, like I need the very air I breathe. She is my everything. No one could ever take her place. I must fight for her, no matter the cost.
Forgetting the ache in my soul, I sprint after her and follow the pounding rhythm of her heart.
As I open the door, which leads to the winding staircase toward the theater below, I catch a brief glimpse of her descending the stairs.
"LEAH!" I call out to her. "Wait!"
The clicks of her heels halt, and she looks up at me from her position on the steps.
Taking the stairs one at a time, I finally reach her and take in her beautiful, tear-stained eyes.
"I thought you said you wouldn't bother me anymore." Leah laughs nervously, biting her lower lip.
"I lied." I place both of my palms on either side of her face, looking deeply into her angelic, chocolate-brown eyes.
"EJ, I can't do this." Leah begins to pull away, but I grip her even harder. She will not do this to me again. "Let me go."
"Never." I watch her eyes as they close and several more tears seep from them. "Leah, look, I know your life has turned to shit ever since you came back to Forks, and I know that it is all because of me." I wipe away her tears. "But you are my world, Leah. You're the only one I ever want. Please forgive me. Say you love me."
"You know I do." Leah whispers, her breath uneven.
"Say it, Leah. I want to hear it from your own lips."
Her eyes open, full of sorrow, and she opens her mouth with only silence to escape it.
"Say you love me, Leah. Only me." I pull her face to mine, hoping she will utter the words I have been longing to hear. "Say you love the unborn child you saved from Nahuel. Say you love the teenager who saved you from the deadly venom spreading through your veins. Say you love the man who made love to you and gave you the most precious gift of all . . . say it, Leah."
Leah hesitates, her eyes never leaving mine. The tears are coming even faster, and her heart is hammering with the cadence of a thousand drums.
"I . . . love you, EJ." She smiles through her sobs; her words are like music to my soul.
Her soothing music spreads like wildfire throughout my entire body, and I feel myself becoming whole again.
"I can't promise you that a life with me will be a piece of cake, but say you want me—danger and all." Our eyes lock together, and I angle my head toward hers. "Stay with me . . ."
"I do want you, EJ." Her voice is just a whisper. "Yes, I'll stay, but I still need some time to figure things out."
"We have all the time in the world." I snake my arms around her waist, and she closes the gap between us, her arms circling around my neck. "I'll wait for you forever."
Leah rises up on her toes, her eyes shutting out the world around us, and my heart soars in everlasting contentment as our lips finally meet.
Attn: Whew, that was exhausting! What do you think? LOL I forgot to mention in the last few posts that my inspiration for Omari is Taylor Kitsch. If you're not sure who he is, Google him; he's pretty hot! Thanks for reading and please review!