So yeah. I know the last one was hard and this one probably will be too, but its going to get a lot better. Trust me. You'll love it again by the end of the story. Enjoy as much as you can.

Stolen Huffy

Pt. 2

Grief comes in waves. Most people don't realize it when their experiencing the emotion, but it does. You can cry for hours and suddenly stop without reason. You could then be fine, as fine as you can be, before the tears begin again without hesitation. That's what Alex was experiencing.

Her eyes were swollen, red and glassy but the tears were gone. She had nothing left to cry at the moment as she lay motionless on the couch in the apartment. Alex was lost. Her world wasn't crumbling. It was gone.

A knock on the door went unnoticed for the most part. It did make her jump but she didn't acknowledge it or the fact it opened. Tara glanced in pensively before walking through the threshold and approaching the catatonic young woman.

"Alex?" she asked tentatively.

Alex didn't respond or bothering looking at the doctor. She only lay on the couch, staring at the far wall.

Slowly Tara walked forward. She didn't want to risk Alex having another outburst or upsetting her further. She treated the young woman like a wild animal, giving her a wide berth and sure to move slow. She even had the tranquilizers in her hand to give her.

"Alex?" Tara tried again when she was standing in the young woman's line of sight. Like before, she didn't reply and Tara figured she might as well continue speaking as though she had. "I brought you something to help." She said, opening the bottle and setting two pills down. She wasn't stupid enough to leave all of them behind. "They're bringing Opie into the Chapel now. If you want to say goodbye."

And that was all. That was the extent of Tara's visit before she turned to leave. She didn't want to lie and say everything was going to be alright. She didn't want to ask Alex what was wrong. She didn't want to do anything. Alex would come to them if she wanted to and Tara knew that, so she left the young woman to herself.

Alex had heard everything Tara said despite remaining silent. She saw the pill bottle, she heard the explanation as to what they were and she heard Tara tell her the guys were bringing in Opie's body. The thought alone was enough to make the tears start again. She didn't know how many times she'd cried over the passed couple of hours, only that she seemed to be getting ready to do it again.

Out in the bar, groups of people began to congregate, ones who knew the man well, others who were there to show support. Alex didn't see any of them as she walked into the belly of the bar. As far as she could tell, it was empty even though she was surrounded by people.

Word had spread fast, as it normally does, about Opie and his situation. Not just his death, but his situation in general as it did with everyone else in the Club. Everyone in the room who spent any amount of time with SAMCRO knew Alex, if not personally then by name, as well as Lyla. They knew the blond with blue eyes was the porn star he married, one of Luanne's girls and the one with dark brown hair and green eyes was Alex, the life-long friend and girl he was screwing before he died.

There were whispering words spoken about Alex but none of it fazed her. They were muttering about her reaction earlier in the day, about her being one of the nines kids, all kinds of bullshit that didn't matter now. None of these people mattered anymore than the mud and shit on someone's boot.

When the Chapel's wide open doors were set before her, actually closed for once, Alex found herself grateful. She wasn't sure she could handle it just yet and elected instead to find her place across from them. There was a support beam about twenty or so feet from the double leather bound doors and that's where she took her perch, leaning against it as though it'd help keep her stationary. Crossing her arms protectively over her chest, a foot propped flatly against the square beam, Alex waited.

The doors opened not too long after she took her stance revealing Jax and Lyla. Jax hesitated when he saw the young woman, but if she noticed him she didn't show it. Her eyes never diverted to him, not even for an instant. The same lack of acknowledgement couldn't be said for Lyla however. The moment the blond saw Alex, rage surged within her.

Unanswered questions and emotions coursed through the porn star's body. It was a highly tense and emotional day, but she couldn't handle them as well as everyone had hoped. Without hesitation or provocation, Lyla stormed around Jax and to Alex, stopping just before the young woman and getting into her face.

"Oh shit." Jax breathed, knowing something bad was about to happen.

"The fuck are you doing here?!" Lyla demanded, tears streaming down her face.

Alex's face was emotionless and blank, her eyes still puffy and red from crying as they slowly moved to meet Lyla's enraged face. The thinner woman was all but shaking as she stood in front of the uncaring Alex.

"You were fucking my husband weren't you?!" she demanded, wanting to yell at something. Even if her accusations were true and had nothing to do with what was happening, she needed something to scream about to release her own pain. Alex remained still. "How could you make him love you?! He was mine! I hate you!"

Without warning Lyla's hand shot back then forward, violently connecting with Alex's cheek. The pain throbbed in her cheek, but didn't register with the young woman as she slowly looked back to the enraged blond.

"Lyla, stop." Jax snapped, rushing forward and grabbing her arms to hold her back and possibly save her from anything Alex might to.

But to his shock and the surprise of everyone in the bar that knew her, Alex did nothing. She didn't speak, she didn't react, and she didn't lunge for Lyla. Instead, she looked blankly at the young woman like she had been since the ordeal began only now a single tear was fleeing each eye.

Jax's brows came together tightly at Alex's curious behavior. If anything, he expected her to speak, but there was nothing.

Wanting to get the young woman as far away from the situation and possible danger as he could, Jax guided the sobbing Lyla away from the increasingly unstable Alex. Left alone, Alex went back to staring into the Chapel. This time she could see the coffin, the jet black box large enough to fit the man within and the hint of slate gray lining. She couldn't see a body and was glad for that. At the moment, ignorant to people staring at the young woman because of the one sided fight, Alex was trying to gain enough courage to step through the doors.

~~~!~~~

Jax had shit to deal with outside, people to talk to and things to do that took nearly an hour. When he walked through the doors again into the Club House, he noticed Alex hadn't moved. In an hour, she hadn't done anything. She was still leaning against the pillar; a foot propped beneath her, her arms over her chest and was staring into the room.

Apprehensively he moved around the front of her. Like before, she didn't acknowledge the man, her eyes intently aimed through the doors at the box where Opie lay. There were drying tears on her cheeks, her makeup mashed up and smeared from rubbing her eyes and emptiness shining through her eyes.

"Why…"

"Because it'd mean he's gone." She told him in a cracking, hoarse voice. She didn't need Jax to finish his question in order to know what he was asking. "If I walk through those doors, it means he's gone."

Her eyes began to water again and before she could blink trailed down her cheeks.

"And I can't do that." She finished, her voice barely louder than a breath.

"You don't have to go in there if you don't want to." He told her as strongly as he could.

"I want to," she said, her eyes finally meeting his. Jax could see immediately the pain within them as she continued to silently cry. "But I can't. My body won't…" the knot in her throat suddenly forced her to stop speaking.

This time she looked away, her brows furrowing as the emotions finally touched her face again. She was telling the truth. Her body wouldn't let her move. It wouldn't let her walk the few steps into the room to see Opie lying there because it knew she couldn't take it. Alex had been trying for an hour with no success.

"Come on."

Alex saw Jax offer a hand. She moved slowly, slower than she thought to reach for it. He held her hand firmly and began to pull her towards the Chapel. Whether she truly wanted to or not, Alex's feet began to work and reluctantly followed Jax.

Her eyes were down until she was inside the room. Alex wasn't sure she could look anywhere else. Jax released her hand and before she could ask why she heard the doors close behind her. He closed the rest of the room out, the noise, the people and the world. He enclosed him and Alex in the Chapel and she could feel the chill of it immediately.

When Jax turned back around he saw Alex's shoulders tremble again her fists clenched so tightly her knuckles were white. It she had nails much longer than they were she would have easily cut her palms. He felt sad for her, the emotion marring his features as he walked up behind her and took her balled fist in his hand.

Alex was breathing long, deep breaths but they weren't helping steady her in the least. If anything they were making her more lightheaded, but she had to do something. When she felt Jax's hand over hers, Alex had hoped it'd give her the strength to look up, but it didn't. She wasn't sure anything would.

"I don't know if I can do this." She said softly, tears coming through her closed eyes.

"We can leave." He told her honestly.

He didn't want to force her, but part of him knew Alex would take it even harder if she didn't. It was the same with him. There was some sick kind of closure that came with seeing a loved one in their coffin. As painful as it was, it did give closure.

Alex knew she wanted to look, she wanted to make sure it was Opie, to see him one last time, but her body wouldn't let her. Her body didn't want to acknowledge him being gone. If she looked in the coffin, it meant Opie wasn't coming back. It meant he was truly gone and Alex didn't know if she could take it. Up until now, she could deny it despite the voice in her head telling her he was gone, Alex could deny it.

Before she could stop herself however, Alex's body betrayed her. Against her wishes, she looked up. Her eyes fell immediately to the large man in the box and without hesitation tears cascaded from her lids. Jax heard her grunt in pain as though someone hit her before the shaking became more pronounced.

It was him. It was Opie. Her Opie. He was lying in the shiny slate gray fabric lining a large black coffin. She couldn't even appreciate the job done to make him look so good, or the appropriate coffin. All she could see was him inside. He still looked alive. He looked like he was sleeping and that made it hurt all the more.

Alex began to cry harder, but her body moved. She stepped forward and out of Jax's grip. He stood back and let her do what she wanted to, what she needed to. A shaking hand came out and to gently touch the dead man's forehead, but never quite made it to his skin. A gasped 'awe' left her lips at the gash in his forehead, another on his cheek. Alex had to fight the urge to try and bandage him up, to get something to help close the wounds.

Suddenly Alex's knees shook their last and she collapsed to the floor. Jax moved for her immediately as she curled to the ground. He barely had to touch Alex's shoulder before the young woman spun around and held him tightly. Jax adjusted himself to hold her as Alex sobbed openly into his leather. He fought back his own tears for her, feeling her agony flow into him without his permission. It was palpable, enough he could almost taste it and drown from it.

Alex held to Jax tighter than anything she ever had in her life. She couldn't feel her fingertips after a while as they dug into Jax's leather, surely cutting bits of his cut without her knowledge. Everything was gone. Everything in her life had been destroyed and the pain of it was too much. It wasn't almost overwhelming, it was passed that point.

Minutes ticked by, perhaps more before Alex could begin to feel her body again. Jax hadn't bothered moving her or even speaking. She would do what she could when she could. Eventually, Alex did begin to move, giving Lax the validation he didn't realize he needed that she was alive.

Slowly and on shaking leg, Alex stood. Jax helped her without question to stand and released her when she had her bearing. She didn't look at him. Jax could see the anguish in her features, the brilliant pink eyes that shined from past and future tears. Her makeup was askew from shielding her face in her hands and her cheeks beet red from crying so hard it hurt.

Her back was to the coffin. Alex couldn't look back at Opie, not like that. She couldn't face seeing him in the box again and refused. Once was far more than enough for a thousand lifetimes. So, without speaking, Alex went towards the doors and opened them, Jax following her.

She didn't see the people looking at her, friend or otherwise. She didn't hear anyone speaking to her. There was nothing. Tara had moved to Jax's side as he wiped tears from his eyes, the two watching as Alex stepped out of the bar all together. The Teller couple shared worried glances before following after her. Neither were sure what she planned to do, if she only needed the air, but both knew she wasn't in any condition to drive.

As they made it to the doorway, to their horror Alex was in the middle of straddling Opie's bike. Without hesitation she kick started it.

"'Ey!" Jax called, rushing for the young woman.

If Alex heard, she didn't acknowledge him as she sped off out of the lot on Opie's SAMCRO bike. Her car was there. Her father's bike was there. But she wasn't.

Jax raced after her a few feet before he realized it was futile. His hands came to his head, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. Ordinarily someone else riding one of their bikes was an ass kicking offense at minimum, but that wasn't what bothered them this time. Despite no one saying anything to Alex because, well it was Alex and this kind of a day, but she shouldn't be driving. A moment ago, she couldn't even stand and now… there was no telling where she was going.

Honestly, when she stole the bike, Alex didn't know either. She only knew she had to get the hell out of there as fast as she could.