Aedan was silent as Fergus explained that he would be staying in Denerim with Cailan when the Warden's departed for Orzammar in the morning. Despite having his suspicions that this would be the case, Aedan still felt his heart sink. Having his brother close had gone some way to easing the pain of his family's death, but being gone from him made him afraid for Fergus's safety. "Just be careful brother." He muttered gruffly, feeling hot tears prick his eyes.

Fergus gripped his arm. "You too Aedan. I wish we did not have to be parted but we both have our duty. When the time comes we will stand together and Howe will pay for his treachery."

Aedan nodded. "No killing him without me."

Fergus hugged him tightly. "Same goes for you little brother."

Aedan gave him a playful shove. "Not so little these days!"

Fergus smiled warmly. "No I suppose not. Sometimes I forget you are an adult and remember the boy who used to follow me around."

"Yeh I guess I was a pain in the ass back then."

Fergus shook his head. "Anything but little brother. I liked having you around, even if sometimes I didn't show it."

Aedan grinned. "You are going soft on me Fergus."

"Older brother's privilege."

"What are you going to do about Garrett?"

Fergus sighed and rubbed his forehead. "I would keep him with me; he's a good man and I trust him, but he has already asked my permission to join the Wardens."

"Maker he really doesn't want to be parted from Jowan does he?"

Fergus raked his fingers through his hair. "How can I deny him? The Blight may take us all."

Aedan gripped his brother's arm. "Don't think like that."

Fergus swallowed and lowered his eyes. "I do not fear death brother. In truth I almost hope for it, to be with Oriana and Oren once more …. I only hope the Maker grants me enough time to see Howe dead."

Aedan paled. "Fergus please, I'm begging you don't talk like that I can't lose you too."

Fergus pulled Aedan into a tight embrace his heart clenching at his brothers trembling frame. "Forgive me brother, I just … without them I am lost."

Aedan clutched his brother, his voice trembling. "I'm still here."

Fergus closed his eyes; Aedan sounded so young, Maker he was only twenty. "I'm not going anywhere Aedan." And for the first time since finding out about the murder of his family he meant it.

xXx

Clearing his throat to catch Bethany's attention; Fergus requested a word with the young mage, who gave him a radiant smile. "Bethany I will be staying in Denerim as advisor to the King." He noticed the momentary look of sadness. "I was hoping you would consent to stay as well. You are a gifted healer and Cailan is not at full strength yet." He shifted slightly. "I am sending a message with the Wardens for Carver to get here as soon as he can so you will have at least one brother with you."

Bethany chewed her lip thoughtfully. "Fergus, Denerim is not exactly the safest place for an apostate."

"Cailan has extended his protection as a personal favour to me and we would not be announcing you are a mage." His tone lowered. "I will keep you safe Bethany."

Bethany's heart fluttered. The Wardens were heading to the Deep Roads and she was not eager to go there, but she did not wish to part from Aeronwen and she feared still for Alistair.

"The Wardens leave tomorrow morning perhaps you can let me know before then."

Bethany swallowed. "I will stay Fergus; but if there is any hint of the Templars discovering I am a mage I must leave. I will not be taken to the Circle."

Fergus smiled. "Should there be such danger I will take you back to Soldiers Peak myself."

xXx

Bethany spoke to Garrett about staying in Denerim, a little surprised by his intention to join the Wardens.

"Fergus will watch out for you, just be careful."

"I will brother. You really love Jowan don't you?"

Garrett gave her a grin. "I do. I would imagine as much as you love Fergus."

Bethany flushed. "At least you get to be with Jowan."

"Maybe in time …"

"Garrett we both know that is not an option. I am a mage and he is the rightful Teryn of Highever."

Garrett grinned. "Wouldn't be the first noble a Hawke mage has married."

Bethany glanced at him startled and then chuckled. "Way to feed my fantasy's brother."

"It's what I'm here for."

"Look out for Aeronwen and Alistair I worry for them."

Garrett gave her a hug. "You have a truly compassionate heart sister, I will do my best."

Bethany smiled and hugged him back. "I should tell Aeronwen. Maker I'm going to miss her."

"I think the feeling will be mutual."

Garrett went to find Jowan as Bethany moved through the Warden compound and into the small garden where she knew she would find her friend. The small patch of land was wildly overgrown, but it had a certain beauty to it and Aeronwen loved it. Bethany found her sitting in the centre of the tangle of foliage simply breathing it in. Marrok was sitting beside her looking slightly more settled than he had been. Bethany picked her way over to her friend, careful to disturb as little as she could.

Aeronwen smiled as Bethany settled next to her. "So next stop Orzammar; the delights of being underground."

Bethany shifted uncomfortably. "Aeronwen I will be staying in Denerim."

Aeronwen glanced at her startled and then nodded, somehow reading the situation in her eyes. "I will miss you."

Bethany took her hand and squeezed gently. "I will miss you too." She continued in a whisper. "Garrett and Jowan will make sure Alistair is given the antidote and Zevran will be keeping an eye on things."

"Just worry about keeping yourself safe, there are many Templars here."

"I know, but staying here with Fergus even though we are not together is worth the risk. You do understand don't you?"

Aeronwen smiled and hugged her friend. "Better than most Bethany."

xXx

Aeronwen gazed at her reflection so much had changed. She wondered what her father would think of her having the love of one Theirin and wanting to be owned by the other. She felt the lump swell in her throat and sniffed dismally, at least in private she did not have to keep herself together. She missed home, her family and her people. She turned startled at the knock on the door and fastened her night robe; quickly wiping the tears from her eyes, opening the door surprised to see Oghren.

"Ah sorry thought I would catch you before you went to bed." Oghren's voice was gruffer than usual.

"I have not gone to bed yet, would you like to come in?"

Oghren flushed and then nodded and stepped into the room. "I … um … well the way I see it Princess I owe you for Branka, so I want you to have this."

Aeronwen stared at the rune he placed in her hand. It fit neatly in her palm and appeared to be made of quartz crystal with a vein of lyrium running through it. "Oghren it's beautiful."

"You activate it by holding it and saying 'raeyr' means bring light or light bringer or something like that in the elven tongue. It was Branka's, but I think she would like you to have it."

Aeronwen glanced to him startled. "Oghren I …"

"Now I know you hate tunnels and being underground, but this way you will always have something to light your way"

Aeronwen swallowed hard before leaning over and pressing a kiss to Oghren's cheek. "Thank you."

Oghren cleared his throat giving her a half-hearted scowl. "No need to go all soppy on me." He muttered gruffly, but there was warmth to his eyes.

"My apologies ser dwarf, perhaps you will accept a drink instead."

Oghren grinned. "Now you're talking, but perhaps tomorrow. Commander said we are heading out early and if I'm to ride another bloody horse I'll need to have a clear head."

"Very well, tomorrow then."

"Goodnight Princess."

"Goodnight Oghren." Aeronwen watched him wander down the corridor and glanced at the rune. So much had changed, but not all of it was painful.

xXx

"Are you mad?!" Jowan spluttered.

Garrett felt his jaw drop; this was definitely not the response he had been expecting. "I …"

Jowan gave him no time to explain; pacing their room, his face furious. "It's bad enough that I have to do this bloody Joining. Do you hear them screaming in the night because of the nightmares that haunt them? I've heard them talking. They see the Archdemon and the Darkspawn in their sleep. I have to do this; it was this or death at the Circle, but you have a choice."

"If I'm a Warden I can stay with you." Garrett managed to get a word in. "And I choose to stay with you."

Jowan scowled. "Warden's don't accept people on the basis of who they happen to be sleeping with!"

Garrett flushed. "I happen to be a good fighter you know."

Jowan's scowl deepened. "I don't want this for you Garrett. I won't have you make this choice because of me."

Garrett sank onto the edge of the bed. "What are you saying?"

Jowan swallowed hard. "I want you to stay with Fergus. We will see each other when we can." He felt tears well in his eyes; the thought of being gone from Garrett for months at a time was almost more than he could bear. He turned and glared out of the window, clenching his fists trying to stop his body from shaking.

"If that is what you want." Garrett whispered his heart feeling as though it was breaking.

"It is."

Garrett stared at Jowan's tense form, wanted to hold him but he could feel the mages anger and did not want to make things worse. "I'm going to get some fresh air." He murmured thinking to give Jowan some time to calm down. He saw him give the slightest of nods. Garrett gave a shuddering breath he was unable to stop and left the room.

Jowan slumped against the wall and gave into the tears that had been burning his eyes. He hadn't realised he was signing up for the Wardens in leaving the Circle he had been too distraught. Duncan had spoken with him briefly ensuring he understood. Aeronwen had argued with Duncan for hours saying Jowan was her responsibility and he had not been conscripted. Duncan had pointed out they had gone to the Circle for mages and had left with one; Jowan was to be a Warden. He did not think either were aware he had heard the argument; but he had adored Aeronwen for it, despite it making no change to what was to happen. He had got used to the idea. He knew there were risks involved, but with the Wardens he at least had some freedom and despite the dangers it was still a better life than the one he had in the Circle. Besides with no Joining potion it was unlikely he would be made a Warden any time soon. He knew he wasn't supposed to know about it, but Jowan's tent had been closest to Duncan's and in the weeks they travelled together he had realised the Commander talked a lot in his sleep. He finally sank onto the bed wondering if Garrett would be gone all night, wishing they had not fought. He woke hours later as Garrett tried unsuccessfully to get into the bed without disturbing him.

"Sorry." He mumbled.

Jowan turned and snuggled into him. "I love you Garrett."

Garrett froze and then relaxed and pulled Jowan to him, kissing him gently. "Love you too."

"I … I don't want to lose you Garrett and I've heard the Joining can be fatal, that's why I was so angry." He gave a shuddering sigh; Garrett's lips were gently working their way down his throat, leaving a trail of heat down his chest.

"Want to be with you whatever the risks." Garrett murmured placing soft kisses against his stomach.

Jowan trembled and moaned loudly as he felt the heat of Garrett's mouth envelop him. They had not been fully intimate with each other, but as Garrett's tongue worked its magic he knew he was ready. "Garrett please I … I want us to be together tonight." He felt Garrett hesitate and then the warrior was working his way back up his body, their eyes locking.

"I want to Jowan; truly I do, but not because you feel we have to because you are leaving tomorrow."

Jowan gazed at him and felt himself shiver realising Garrett would do as he asked no matter how much it hurt him. He ran his thumb across Garrett's cheek. "Maker who am I kidding, I'd run away from the Wardens first chance I get to be with you." He reasoned with himself if the worst happened and Garrett lost his life in the Joining he would follow him, he had come close to taking his own life more than once and for Garrett he would risk the Makers displeasure.

Garrett's lips were so close to Jowan's the mage could almost taste him. "Joining the Wardens is my choice, the risks are my choice."

"But you're doing it to stay with me." Jowan whimpered, his anger gone.

"Bethany risks discovery staying in Denerim to be near Fergus. Aeronwen risked everything to come to Ferelden and continues to risk Maker knows what for Alistair. We risk our lives travelling with the Wardens, helping them to defeat the Blight. We are heading into war and I want to spend what time we have together."

Jowan kissed him hoping his actions would speak for him where words simply did not seem adequate.

Garrett was startled when Jowan managed to flip them over; groaning with delight as his mage straddled him, Jowan's kisses becoming demanding. Garrett gave a low growl as Jowan nipped at his throat, his lips drifting to his ear.

"I want to make love with you Garrett." Jowan whispered; his voice no longer trembling, but husky with desire, love and excitement. "Will you let me show you how much I love you?"

Garrett hadn't imagined Jowan would be the dominant partner in their lovemaking; but seeing the look in his eyes, the mages hands setting his body ablaze he nodded, his fevered yes drowned in Jowan's hungry kiss.

xXx

With dawn's arrival Zevran moved to Bethany's side passing a sealed parchment into her hand, his words whispered to her ear.

Bethany smiled and nodded in understanding. Should they have need of it; Zevran had given her the means to send him a coded message, or indeed decipher a message from him. She hugged Alistair whispering that all would be well and reminding him he had friends before she said her goodbyes to the others, hugging Garrett and Jowan last as they waited for Aeronwen.

Fergus and Aedan exchanged a final goodbye, both urging the other to be careful.

Aeronwen moved swiftly down the stairs looking flushed and unsettled.

Bethany glanced back at the stairs and seconds later Cailan appeared to send them off. She felt her stomach twist wondering if he was the reason for her friend's discomfort. He had arrived earlier that morning to speak to Duncan regarding the treaties. Bethany hugged her friend, squeezing her hand gently.

Aeronwen held her tightly for a few seconds before forcing herself to move away. "Stay safe Bethany."

"You too. Be careful in Orzammar."

Aeronwen ran her fingers over the rune Oghren had given her and smiled. "I will be fine. Hopefully we will see each other again in little over a month."

As everyone started to get onto their horses Cailan took told of Aeronwen's hand. "We will discuss this further on your return my lady."

Aeronwen took her hand from Cailan's; her tone soft but deliberately distant, hiding her mounting frustration. "I believe we have discussed everything your Majesty and my answer remains the same." She climbed up next to Duncan who had the only horse who didn't appear nervous around her.

Cailan moved back as they left, his eyes narrowing wondering if it was possible Duncan was his competition. With any luck the Commander would kill the Archdemon dying as all those before him.

Bethany turned to Fergus, her eyes questioning.

Fergus rubbed his forehead; the sooner they found Cailan a wife the better.