Chapter Thirty Six

I sat next to Lizzie and Logan and tried to ignore the killing games behind me. Lizzie looked on edge at the snarls and hisses that erupted from both sides.

"That was," Logan interrupted the silence. The three of us had been quiet the whole time, especially after watching Jasper and Alice's demonstration. The games were a little too close for me, and I wanted to pretend that almost everyone I cared about weren't practicing killing newborn vampires.

"That was what?" Lizzie asked tightly. Her cinnamon eyes were hard to see in the gloom. We were sitting under some trees and a full moon made it easy for me to see the rushing masses of fur and the nearly invisible pale white shadows, the Pack and the Cullens.

"A killer party." Logan finished. His dark eyes were nervous as he watched arch enemies pretending to fight. His eyes went to Lizzie and me. "Was that a pun?"

Lizzie gave him a uncomfortable fond look and she shrugged. I squirmed against the tree behind me, trying to get comfortable. "I don't like to watch. I don't know how you can."

Logan looked at her and said, "This is almost better than 300."

I croaked. "Ha-ha."

Logan smiled at me but I knew he was stressed as well. This wasn't entirely the best way to spend graduation night. I probably should have stayed home.

Lizzie sighed and she joined me on my tree, sitting on my right side. "Sam's about to kick it." Her words made me look over at her.

"Dang." Logan muttered and I knew he was looking at her. "Sorry, Liz."

"It's okay." I heard Lizzie sniffle and I shifted from my spot, trying to pinpoint where she was. "He lasted a long time."

"Yeah?" I asked shakily.

"Yeah." Lizzie said in the dark. "He's had his moments where we thought he. . ." Her voice trailed off and the silence was painful. She broke it after a pause. "This is the lowest he's ever been."

Logan and I were quiet. I couldn't tell exactly where Lizzie was. I wanted to give her a hug. "I'm sorry, Liz."

"He'll be okay." Lizzie said certainly and I glimpsed something move. She sniffled harder. "He'll be okay in a few months. He'll be up in the clouds."

I looked down, saddened and Logan asked, "Has he asked for. . . For a clean slate?"

Lizzie shook her head. Logan was asking if Sam had asked for her to clear his name. I wondered if he knew what she knew, if he found out that I wasn't the only human in on an ancient secret. Sam had tried to ask me but Alice had stopped him from it.

"He asked to be changed." The words left my mouth. I didn't hear any sort of reaction, and I didn't know if that was good.

Lizzie spoke. "He doesn't want to go."

No one does.

"I know they could." I told Lizzie, thinking of the Cullens. It was going to be hard as heck to explain, but if Lizzie wanted this for Sam. . . "They could do it for him."

Lizzie declined. "I don't want to do that to my aunt. We'd have to hide him from her." The truth in her words made my heart ache for Lizzie and her cousin. "Sam wouldn't want that; he just wants more time." Her words made me think. "He doesn't want to be alone if he gets it."

Logan sighed. "That sucks."

"Yep." Lizzie sniffled again. "Sure does."

"Bells?" Charlie knocked on my door.

I opened my eyes groggily and sat up. My eyes flitted around as motion caught my attention. My eyes went to the door and I saw Charlie standing in the threshold. He looked confused and bone tired.

"When did you get home?" He asked and leaned against the door exhaustedly.

A pang of concern for him delayed my response. I focused on his question, and then I realized I didn't have an answer. I fumbled for a lie. "I was going to call. It ended late."

"Oh." Charlie said absently. I looked at him and climbed out of my bed, surprised to see myself still fully dressed from the night before. I looked at Charlie's tired face and watched him rub his eyes.

"Dad?" I asked and Charlie's eyes went to me. "Are you okay?"

Charlie nodded heavily and he sighed. He turned around to leave and as he did, he said, "Good to see you, Bells," and then he closed my room door.

I looked at the door for a few seconds before sighing. I turned around only to jump when I bumped into a body. I took a step back, looking up. It was hard to believe, but both Edward and Jacob stood in my room.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked quietly, which was hard to do because they had scared the heck out of me.

Edward spoke and raked a hand over his bronze hair. "Someone had to take you home."

I looked at Jacob and arched both eyebrows. He gave me an uneasy look. "Couldn't let him do it alone."

I could feel a tension between them and I hoped for my sake that it was the usual werewolf versus vampire tension. I didn't want to think that the two of them had had some sort of spite and-

"What's up with your dad?" Jacob asked in the quiet. I looked at him from door again. Somehow my eyes had found it.

I felt a sigh trying to escape and I held it down. "Sam's case is stressing him out."

"Hm." Jacob hummed nonchalantly and took a spot on my bed. Edward went to my rocking chair and I had the undivided attention of them both.

"Um, well," I mumbled, feeling heat begin to gather in my cheeks. "I'm going to go shower."

"Okay." Jacob said and the two of them seemed to somehow merge themselves into my room. I knew they were going to be waiting for me when I came back.

I picked up my bag of toiletries and my old sweats before I headed into the bathroom.

The hot water didn't do me any good. Thoughts about the coming battle had sunk into my skin and the tension that awaited me in my room made my mind begin to heat.

I slammed off the water and changed quickly. I sniffed at my hair, smelling Charlie's shampoo. It didn't smell too bad, great in fact, but I had to wash my hair every few days it seemed. No wonder Renee complained.

I took a moment to look around in the kitchen and the living room. I grumbled under my breath. Charlie had gone to work without saying 'goodbye'.

I walked back into my room and I tossed my bag onto the floor. I looked at the two of them. They were still waiting. Adonis sat on my bed and his muscular acquaintance sat my rocking chair; I waited.

After a few seconds of silence, I blurted, "Do you guys have to tell me something?"

Edward and Jacob both nodded, and then they looked at each other. Jacob gestured for Edward to talk and Edward shrugged. Wait. They were being polite? Jacob was being polite? "Wow." I said before Edward spoke.

"Yeah, I know," Jacob turned a darker shade of rust in his cheeks.

Edward smiled before speaking. "We made a new treaty last night."

"Wow." I said again. They could make new treaties?

"We're not allowed to hurt or harm each other until the battle." Edward said and then he shrugged. "Not sure when it ends."

I looked slyly at Jacob. "Is being polite part of it?"

Jacob shrugged, shy. "It makes it easier."

I looked at his russet face and at Edward's beautiful one, and I said, "Until the battle?"

"Yup." Jacob popped the p. I gave Jacob another look and then I realized how long his hair had grown. It covered his ears now though it wasn't what it used to be. His locks didn't fall the same way, he must have gotten it parted or something to the like.

I stood around in my room and looked at the two of them. "Was there something else?"

"Yeah." Jacob answered, catching Edward's eyes. "We've got to work out some things for the battle, but what we've got so far is that you, our friend Edward here, Lizzie, Logan, and the Clearwaters will be in a tent not far from the meadow. We'll be able to run back if she finds you."

"So we'll camp before the battle. Okay." I said, trying not to think about what he said too hard. "Got it."

Edward nodded and looked at Jacob. "Nice job."

"Yeah, um, you too." I almost wanted to start snickering. This was a serious matter but the fact that it seemed to kill Jacob to not say 'leech'. . . Poor Jake.

"See you guys tomorrow?" I asked as I escorted them out of the door. Jacob shrugged and Edward looked uncertain. "Sunday?" They both looked unsure and then I got it. "You guys will be practicing. Right." I'd have to make some plans.

Jacob sensed my mind begin to start up and he helped. "Lizzie and Logan will be with Emily."

"Okay. Thanks for the tip." I said and looked at the two of them on my porch.

It had been silly to think that I could be with Edward and painful to think that I couldn't be with Jacob. They deserved someone of their own, Edward a vampire, and Jacob an imprint. They needed someone who was always going to be beside them.

I said, "See you guys."

Jacob nodded. "Bye, Bells." He turned to Edward nervously and I swallowed a giggle. "Bye. . . Cullen."

"See you, wolf." Edward said politely. An odd smile came onto Jacob's face and he nodded at Edward. We watched Jacob walk down to the forests next to my house. Edward turned back to me when he had disappeared. "Will you be okay? Do you need Alice or anything?"

"I'll be fine," I said and then thought about it, "but a day with Alice would be great." I then added, thinking of his beautiful, suddenly not-so-hostile adopted sister. "And Rosalie."

Edward smiled and said, "Whatever works for you." I waved to him and he turned, becoming a blur as he ran. I turned back to close the door but a gust of wind and lips on my forehead made me stop.

I glimpsed Edward smile a sad smile, before he was gone. He didn't come back.

I turned back to the empty house and went to the phone. I never finished the rest of Sam's voicemail and a pang of disdain made me pause. Why didn't I delete it yesterday? Charlie might have heard some of it.

"Crap." I said and listened to Sam's voice.

". . . Anyways . . . would you mind driving me to the convenience store on Monday?" Sam asked me. "I don't want Mom to take me there. She walks me around like I'm ten again."

I nodded into the phone. I could do that, granted he wouldn't try to talk to me about Victoria. Lizzie didn't want it for Sam. Maybe if I told him what he would be losing, Sam wouldn't want it either.

"Thanks in advance, I guess." Sam said, "Or not. I mean, you don't have to." He sighed. "I just don't want Mom to treat me like I'm a kid. I'm dying, not turning six."

His words made me sad. "It'd be cool of you to do that for me." He said and then he said, "Maybe I could buy some spray tan for us? We could be orange together!" His jubilant, silly words made my heart twist.

I listened in for the rest. "Nah, just kidding." He said and added sheepishly, "Well, I mean, I could, if you wanted to."

"Oh, Sam," I sighed. Lizzie had such a good-hearted cousin. There was something about Sam that always seemed so happy to me. He seemed like his own sun, his own little light in a dark place. I hoped he stayed that way, right to the end.

". . . I honestly just want some shampoo." Sam said, "and a new watch. Mine broke."

Something about that watch stood out. Did he actually want to try and count how much time he had left?

"Some soap would be cool too," Sam went on, "and toilet paper. Pine needles suck." I laughed when Sam added that last part.

". . . Hey, Bella?" Sam spoke and I suddenly realized that Sam had forgotten this was a voicemail. He seemed to feel like he was talking to me. "I gotta go soon, in both ways," his words made my laughter die away. "But, um, just a secret." He said.

I leaned in, listening hard. Sam barely spoke above a whisper now.

"I make video logs." He said, "I make them for Mom to watch. She doesn't know why I'm on the computer talking." He said bitterly, "She thinks I'm talking to a long lost pen pal. Another secret: we lost touch about five months ago."

I listened for more.

"If you could, I'm going to tell Lizzie eventually, but, um," the fact that he was telling me this first made me feel touched, "Show Mom some time? For me, please? She needs to know that I wasn't sad the entire time."

"How long did you start this, Sam?" I asked aloud and nearly jumped when Sam spoke.

"I started it shortly after my diagnosis." Sam answered my question, making me blush. "But, um, and I really gotta go. . . I don't want to pressure you anymore." He said and added wistfully. "And I really want that convenience store trip."

I waited.

"Please, Bella, show Mom when I'm gone. Don't wait too long if you do." Sam instructed. "And I think she'll like them. I don't know which one will be my last so I make them as often as I can."

"Oh, Sam," I sighed at his words.

"I'll leave you be now. Um, call me if you're going to sacrifice time and gas and a silent car ride to take me to the convenience store." Sam said awkwardly. "Thanks for listening. Bye-" Funny enough, the voicemail cut off his goodbye.

I deleted the voicemail, engraving Sam's funny, charming remarks to memory, before I dialed him.

"Bella?" Sam picked up on the second ring. He sounded ecstatic. "Hi!" he shouted. In a lower voice, he said, "I wasn't sure you were going to call."

"Hi, Sam." I said, trying to sound cheerful. It wasn't hard. Just hearing his voice made me feel warm inside.

"Hi, Bella," Sam crooned. He smiled in the phone. "I didn't know I was going to be clear for that long."

I nodded and then said, knowing this would make him grin, "I can take you tomorrow." Maybe Lizzie could come too. "We can make it a field trip and bring Lizzie too."

"Really?" Sam gasped and he cheered. "Aw, thanks!"

"No problem." I said sincerely. "And, um, about your video logs. . ."

"Yeah?" Sam sounded serious now.

"I'll show your Mom if Lizzie doesn't." I was sure Lizzie was going to show her aunt the logs. There wasn't a way she wouldn't. "Your secrets are safe with me."

"Secrets?" Sam sounded confused.

I smiled tightly. "About your pen pal."

"Oh right." Sam smiled and laughed in relief. "You're a lifesaver, Bella. Mom drives me crazy taking me to the store." He began to go on and I tried not to think about what he called me. I wasn't a lifesaver. Danger magnets didn't save lives.

"Mom would point me down the aisle and then walk me the entire way down." Sam's voice was filled with playful annoyance. "I love her though. I love my mom."

I nodded into the phone and chimed in. "That's great, Sam. I love mine too."

"Yep." Sam smiled. "There's nothing about someone who cares about you so much, who'll stick with you until the end." Something darkened in his voice. "She looks at me sometimes and I can see it in her eyes. She worries for me, like Lizzie."

Sam sighed, saddened by a thought. "How do I tell her I'll be okay? I don't want to leave, but I'm sure I'll be fine."

"Hm." I said sadly. I sank onto the floor and listened.

"Lizzie knows I'll be fine. She'll miss me just as much as Mom will, but she knows I'll be okay. I wish I had her confidence." Sam said wistfully. "I would have made more friends. I probably would have kept my pen pal too."

I laughed darkly and said, "Would they take you to the convenience store?"

Sam thought about it. "Probably not. They'd probably buy all my stuff for me."

"Bummer."

"Yeah." Sam agreed.

I smiled. "So, Sam, about that spray tan you were talking about. . ."

Sam started laughing and I joined in, thinking longingly to Sam's bright smile; I was sure he was smiling. Ever since I had met him, he had always made me smile with some witty comment. Lizzie made tangled situations make sense and brought a bright light into every room she walked in. I knew then, when dying surfer Sam started laughing, that angels existed.

Edward and Alice looked like angels.

Sam and Lizzie were angels.

K*H*W* (go to my profile :)