"Mama, I do it," Bethy said, pulling at the dress that Hawke was (valiantly) trying to tug over her head.

"Let mama do it, darling," Hawke said, but Bethy pulled away and shrieked.

"I do it!" she said, pulling the dress out of Hawke's hands, and Hawke sighed deeply.

"Bethy, you are being very naughty right now," she warned.

"No, I good. I do it," Bethy said, and stuck her arm into the dress where her head was supposed to go. In a matter of minutes, she had it on, but upside down. "See? I do it!"

"Can I help?" Hawke asked her, weakly.

It was a battle they were having to fight more and more often, as Bethy got older. The little girl was showing quite the stubborn streak, and quite the temper, flashing hot and then trying to diffuse the situation by turning on the charm.

Aveline laughed about it and said she was glad she'd managed to talk Donnic out of children for the time being. Isabela laughed about it and said she was glad she could turn Bethy back over to Hawke and go home. Varric chuckled and encouraged her to be her worst, which Hawke strongly disapproved of. Sebastian seemed to not know what to do with her, and generally, when Bethy started acting up, retreated to the Chantry, saying he needed to pray. Hawke didn't blame him; she felt like disappearing and praying herself, some days.

It wasn't that Bethy was a bad child; she was generally well-behaved, in fact. But there were times, and those times were growing more often and closer together, that she sorely tested Hawke's patience.

Fenris was another story. Bethy had him wrapped around her little finger. The elf seemed to indulge her in whatever she wanted with the exception of the much-loved cookies, even letting the child stay up past a sane bedtime (and with Hawke trying to give him bedroom eyes to spur him along in his decision to put Bethy to bed) if it made her happy.

It certainly didn't make Hawke happy, but it was what it was.

Eventually, Hawke got the dress on Bethy the correct way, and noted that they would need to get some warmer clothes relatively soon. Longer sleeves for the dresses, and some more socks; it was getting to be fall, with All Soul's Day more than a month behind them, and Hawke wasn't going to get caught unprepared. Bethy seemed to go through clothes like mad; it was almost as if she wore an outfit once, maybe twice, before she had outgrown it and needed a new one.

Between the spoiled attitude and the outgrowing clothes, Hawke was finding motherhood much more trying now than she was before. Bethy getting closer to being two years old didn't help matters; it wasn't for naught that the other mothers at the Chantry School talked of their children going through the "terrible twos," she thought to herself.

There was also the fact, and she was loath to mention this to anyone, so she kept it to herself, that Bethy was… well, growing up. She would think back on the tiny infant she first held to her breast, the little baby who could do nothing but depend on her mother, and feel tears well up in her eyes. She was still young, and if she and Fenris were to marry, perhaps…

No, it was still too early to think about more children, and with the tensions mounting in Kirkwall between the mages and the templars, and with everything seeming to be absolutely insane, there would be no way she could excuse herself away from the situation for a year, and no way she would be able to hide a pregnancy. Back when she was newly Champion… well, it was difficult to figure out how she could hide it then. Now, when she was an established part of Kirkwall society, when everyone knew her and relied on her to be the foil between Meredith and Orsino?

No, she had to face the facts: until things settled down tremendously, and until Meredith was replaced with an actual Viscount, she would have to be content with just Bethy.

Which was good, she tried to tell herself, because Bethy was a handful. She got into everything, making huge messes all over the house. Somehow, she had gotten into the privy and threw rolls of privy paper around, causing Orana to mutter the first curse Hawke had ever heard from the little elven woman. Bodahn tried to be encouraging, but when she managed to get into a (cold) fireplace and strewed the ashes everywhere, even he started to give up. Only Sandal (and Hero, strictly speaking) maintained any level of happy sanity with the toddler, neither of them being affected too harshly by her intense decision to make life nearly unbearable in the household.

It seemed as though Hawke bore the brunt of the burden as well, for Fenris found himself called away more and more, often by Aveline, sometimes by Varric. Slavers were being more active in and around the Kirkwall area and Fenris was always the go-to for hunting them down, in part because he enjoyed it so much and in part because he was a competent fighter and was willing to do it. So, Hawke was left home with Bethy more often than not, although she always offered to go on the jobs with her elf. Fenris turned her down every time, usually wording it in such a way that she felt she couldn't argue with him on the reasons why she should just stay home.

Overall, however, life was fairly good during the month of Kingsway. The weather was turning cooler, which was never a problem for the Ferelden-born Hawke, and word was starting to get out about her engagement, probably thanks in large part to Varric and his rather large mouth (and penchant for telling whatever stories and gossip he thought he could get away with.) The de Launcets had already been by to try to talk her out of such a course of action, and it was only a long-standing familial friendship that kept Dulci from being kicked out of the Hawke estate, quite literally. Kirkwall Society was scandalized that Hawke, Champion and noble that she was, even if only a noble by the skin of her teeth, was choosing to marry a former elven slave.

Fenris, not surprisingly, took much more offense to the offense than Hawke herself did, and she had to have several long talks with him that revolved around the subject of her being perfectly content with her choice in a future husband, reminding him that he was Bethany's father and shouldn't be planning on going anywhere, anyway, before he finally started settling down enough to ignore some of the sneers and rumors that were sent their way. Hawke had little enough care for what Kirkwall Society thought even when her mother was alive; now that she was finally in a position where she was happy and doing something about it, there was no way she was giving it up simply because his ears were not rounded enough for their pleasure, or his blood the perfect shade of blue for their contentment.

For now, though, Hawke was learning to play the housewife to someone who was acting more the mercenary than ever before, even if it was mercenary working in conjunction with the city guard, and mercenary taking out mainly slavers, but mercenary all the same. Playing housewife was something she hadn't truly had a thought to do, in her life, not seriously, and she was finding that staying at home was driving her insane, slowly, by inches.

For a Hawke used to fighting against something much more tangible (and profitable) than housewifely duties, the job of taking care of Bethy was something she was, she thought to herself, ill-equipped to do, and nothing made her feel this way more than attempting to train Bethy to use the privy.

It wasn't that Bethy was picking up the skill slowly; indeed, she was picking it up rather quickly, according to the other mothers who took their children to the Chantry School and had already gone through such a process. It was the process itself which was difficult, and irritating. And Hawke bore the majority of the burden of it, as Fenris was not there, Orana recused herself from the duty, and she couldn't ask Bodahn or trust Sandal. Therefore, the duty fell to her, as rough as it was, and most days found Hawke rushing Bethy into the privy, hoping that this was the time she didn't soil her nappie, a prayer to the Maker that this was the time that the child picked up on what was supposed to be happening.

It was slow going, and something Hawke complained about at length, which did not serve to make her any more popular with her friends. They were mostly accompanying Fenris on his jobs, or going about their lives without privy-training, and few wanted to listen to Hawke lament another day wasted. Merrill was the exception; she seemed fascinated with Hawke's mothering of Bethy, and was always up for a visit, and discussions of child rearing in the human world as compared to child rearing amongst the Dalish. Not that Merrill had much in the way of experience with child rearing, but training as First did teach her many things, and taking care of children was one of them.

In between privy-training, trying to get Bethy to behave, Chantry School, and the everyday dealings of having a very strong-willed toddler, Hawke's friends pressured her about when she and Fenris were finally going to have their wedding. Over a month had passed since his proposal and they still had not picked a date, and Hawke was no closer to making a decision as to when to actually have the ceremony than she was the day Fenris asked her.

In fact, there were no wedding plans whatsoever, other than a vague idea that they were going to have one. Every time Hawke tried to sit Fenris down to discuss it, they wound up seeing who could out-nervous the other on the discussion. Wanting to get married was all very fine indeed, they seemed to think, but the actual plans were just too much pressure, and so conversations would eventually gravitate away from "when do you want to get married?" to small details about the most recently-killed group of slavers that Fenris came up against, or small tidbits about how Bethy was doing, or how well marriage suited Aveline (this topic came up a lot, as a natural gravitation away from the subject of their own impending marriage and just as regular gossip.) It wasn't that Fenris and Hawke didn't want to get married. It was more like they wanted the wedding, and all the build-up to the wedding, to already be over with so they could get along with the business of being a married couple.

The subject of elopement came up more than once.

The month of Harvestmere began with a chill, and it was with cool temperatures and a blustery wind that Feastday greeted the Hawke household. Hawke was insistent that this Feastday only be about family, and refused to accept any of their friends over for the celebrations, using soft words to get them to do their own thing, this time. Instead, she bothered Gamlen until he and Charade both promised to come, and wrote letter after letter to Carver in the Gallows until he promised he would see about getting some time off to come over and eat with them. Hawke even promised to delay suppertime until Carver was able to come, so long as the templar let her know a time, but he just grumbled (Grumbled! Even written replies read as grumbling!) and said he'd be there when he was there.

Hawke had spent the day before with Orana in the kitchen, cooking up a storm so that the family would have plenty to eat, and got up earlier than usual in order to get the roast on for that evening's meal. Soon, Feastday cooking smells filled the house and whetted everyone's appetites, for Bethy constantly asked when they were finally going to get to eat the yummy foods, and even Fenris bothered Hawke more than once on the matter, simply laughing when she smacked him on the arm and told him to get out of her kitchen, she'd be ready when she was ready.

And then it was evening time, and Carver had shown up (with Merrill!) and Gamlen was there, along with Charade. Orana, Bodahn, and Sandal were invited to eat along with the rest of the family (they were, after all, family, said Hawke) and even Anders was sought out and invited to grab some food to take back to his room (because Hawke had no desire to listen to arguments and bickering between Fenris and Anders, for one, and because she wanted to keep it down to just family, for another.)

It was obvious, from watching Gamlen's interactions with Bethy, that the man truly did not know how to deal with children. Hawke thought it was a good thing that Charade was as old as she was, or else Gamlen would have been having a much harder time coping. As it was, he was trying, and it amused Hawke to no small end to watch him talk oh so seriously with Bethy about Chauncey and blocks and books. The slightly panicked look on his face when Bethy announced to him that she needed to use the "pretty" was priceless, although he was excused from that particular job and Fenris saw to Bethy's needs instead. Charade was much better at dealing with Bethy than Gamlen was, giving Hawke the idea that she had been around children a lot more than her father had.

Hawke made a valiant attempt to corner Carver and ask him what his intentions were towards Merrill, exactly. She had made no secret that she had wanted to leave her friends to their own devices this day, and just have family at the house (and Anders, and the servants, but you couldn't have everything) and Carver dodged and avoided the questions brilliantly until finally he could run from them no more.

"I just thought she'd enjoy being with us today, is all," he said, somewhat defiantly.

"Are you wanting to marry her?" Hawke asked, straightforward.

"Maker's breath, that's the last thing I need, is to marry anyone. No, sister. I just… enjoy her company, is all."

"Yes, well, make sure you enjoy her company quietly, and you're nice to her, or else I'll kill you." Carver blushed brilliantly.

"Yes, right, well…"

"Yes," Hawke said, and that was the end of that.

Dinner itself was well received by all. Hawke and Orana got their fair share and more of praise for the delicious foods they cooked for the family, and there was plenty to eat with leftovers to send home with Gamlen and Charade and Merrill, and with even more left for tomorrow for Hawke's household. Carver lamented that he had no place to store the leftovers, nor anything to do with them, or else he'd take some, as well. Inviting him back for more seemed to not please him, but Carver was grumpy at the best of times and sometimes, Hawke felt, nothing pleased him at all. Although he did seem happy enough around Merrill, and Hawke found that very telling.

With the days getting shorter, night was coming on much more quickly, and Hawke made sure that Gamlen and Charade left out before it got dark, so that they could walk back to his place in Lowtown (where Charade was staying, temporarily, before going back to Tantervale on business for the Red Jennies) in semi-safety (for how safe was Kirkwall, truly, even during the day and the best of times?) and Carver and Merrill promised to escort them both safely back to their home, so Hawke found herself with not much to do and a much emptier house quite suddenly.

It was almost like a loss, after having her family there with her all day, and Hawke realized how empty her mansion felt to her during most of the day, especially when Fenris wasn't home. The house was huge, with plenty of room for Carver, and for more children, and for people visiting, and Hawke was saddened by the fact that it was so empty. But she did have Fenris there, and Bodahn, Sandal, and Orana, and Anders haunting her cellar, and, of course, Bethany, there to keep her humble and grounded no matter what, and so Hawke forced herself into a sort of cheerfulness.

Once everyone had gone, and it was just her and Fenris and Bethy again, Fenris started acting a bit nervous, and it wasn't until after they had put Bethany to bed that evening that Hawke discovered exactly why he was so nervous.

"I must speak with you," he said to her, taking her hand and leading her into the library. Fenris settled on the sofa and Hawke sat beside him, arching a delicate brow over how conflicted he seemed to be.

"Fenris, whatever you need to talk to me about, it's fine. I'm here and I'm not going to get mad."

"I didn't think—You would not get mad over this. I simply… do not know how to proceed."

"Well, the night isn't getting any younger. Perhaps you should just talk to me about whatever is troubling you?"

He reached into the pocket of his tunic, his brows drawn down in irritated concentration, and then withdrew something and thrust it into Hawke's hands, closing her fingers around it.

"I got you a ring," he said, and, indeed, Hawke opened her hands to see that he had put said ring there. It was quite lovely, delicate, with blue stones, and Hawke's mouth dropped open as she held it up to look at it better.

"Oh Fenris," she said, marveling at it. "It's so beautiful! But you didn't have to get me a ring."

"I wanted to. It was the proper thing to do, and I wanted to, so I did." His nervousness seemed to be melting away and he settled back on the sofa, a lot more comfortable than he had been when they entered the room. "I take it you like it?"

"It's so pretty, I love it," Hawke said, trying the ring on her finger and turning it this way and that so the stones caught the light. "Thank you, Fenris. This was very thoughtful of you." Hawke leaned over and brushed her lips against his cheek and he reached up and touched her jawline gently with the tips of his fingers.

"I want you to be happy, Marian," he said, softly, almost somberly. "You and Bethy mean everything to me."

"You mean everything to me, too," she said, seriously. She lifted her hand slowly, ran her fingers over his hair, and Fenris leaned in to her touch and closed his eyes. "I'm so lucky to have you and Bethy both. I'm glad Danarius is dead now and you are free. I'd kill him a hundred times over if it meant keeping you with me. I am only sorry about your sister."

"It was her choice," he replied, voice rough for an instant. He sat up and opened his eyes, shook his head. "It was her choice to betray me. She could have had everything I have and more, if she had only valued family over her chance to become a magister." He spat the last word and Hawke sighed to herself. Shouldn't have brought it up; that's on me, I suppose, she thought.

"You're going to have a brother now, though," she said, trying to nudge the subject somewhere happier. "How does that make you feel?" Fenris watched her, shrewdly, a little smirk playing on his lips that said he knew what she was doing and appreciated it.

"I do not know. I am unsure of how I am supposed to feel. It is Carver, after all."

"And he's a bit of a tit," Hawke said, causing his lips to quirk up into a truer smile.

"He is at that. He seems quite smitten with Merrill. Is that wise of him, being a templar as he is?"

"No, it's not, but far be it from me to tell him what he should and shouldn't be doing with his love life," she said, shaking her head, dark locks dancing around her face. "As long as they're both happy, I guess it's best that I not try to interfere."

"Mmm." Fenris made a hum of agreement and tilted his head back onto the sofa, closing his eyes again. "Your uncle seems to be doing well with his surprise fatherhood."

"Yes! I'm surprised at that, myself," she replied, snuggling up against him and getting a smile for her efforts. Hawke smiled back and rested her head on Fenris's shoulder, lifting her hand to admire the ring again. It really was pretty, and extremely thoughtful of him. This must be why he's been taking so many mercenary jobs lately, she thought. It was just like Fenris, to surprise her with his thoughtfulness.

"It is incredible, finding out you are going to have a child. The feeling is like none other in the world," Fenris went on, stroking his hand down Hawke's back slowly.

"Imagine being the woman," she replied, with a chuckle.

"It is not the same, Hawke," he said, dryly.

"Of course it's not. That's why I said, imagine being the woman. It's quite a bit different for us. You could have decided you wanted nothing to do with Bethy and myself, but I didn't have that decision to make."

"I could not have decided that," Fenris argued, bringing his hand to rest on the curve of her hip. "Hawke, I could not have left you alone, much less Bethy. I am yours."

"And I am yours," she said, kissing his chin quickly, and Fenris angled his face down so that their lips met. Before the kiss could go on too long, Hawke pulled away and grinned at him. "How about we take this upstairs? Everyone else is asleep, but…"

She laughed as Fenris growled in agreement and tugged her up to follow him up the stairs.

"Mama," Bethy said, tugging on Hawke's skirts.

"And, well, we've just not got a date picked out yet," she said to Aveline, crossing her arms under her breasts and trying to not let the blush show on her face. It was halfway through Harvestmere and she and Fenris still had not decided on the "when" part of their marriage. It was easier not to talk about it, because otherwise, they wound up talking circles around each other. "What do you want to do?" "I don't know, what do you want to do?" It was frustrating.

"Mama," Bethy said again, tugging the skirts of Hawke's robe. "Pretty. Gotta pretty."

"What? Oh, yes. Privy, Bethy. Excuse me, Aveline." She took Bethy's hand and walked to the downstairs privy and waited while Bethy saw to her business.

It was actually a perfect time for an interruption, she thought, leaning against the wall. Aveline had been going on, again, about Hawke picking out a date for her wedding. Hawke just wanted the wedding itself over with; every time she thought about it, she was overcome with nerves that were unlike her, and she just couldn't make any decisions for herself. Aveline was getting worse about hounding Hawke about the subject, as well, which wasn't doing Hawke any favors in the nerves department. And when she managed to catch Hawke and Fenris together, it was ridiculous. She had even bullied Donnic into getting on to Fenris about it at the weekly Diamondback games that he held at his mansion.

Hawke winced, thinking about Fenris's mansion. That was another thing that Aveline was going on about. She was, apparently, losing the ability, quickly, to dissemble regarding the mansion, and Seneschal Bran was starting to close in on it. Fenris had no real legal claim to it, and the place was a mess, something that needed to be cleaned up, Hawke admitted, but it was also Fenris's, and she wasn't going to push him along into something he wasn't ready for, which, in this case, was getting rid of the mansion.

Hawke helped Bethy finish up, then lavishly praised her about what an excellent job she did. She found lavish praise worked nearly as well as…

"Cookie?" Bethy asked, holding her hand out.

"Wash your hands first," Hawke said, and demonstrated in the washbasin. Bethy had more fun splashing in the water than actually washing her hands, and managed to get the top of her dress soaked while doing it. Hawke just sighed and used a bit of toweling to sop up as much water as possible, then, shaking her head, decided that a complete outfit change was going to be necessary. Ah well. Aveline will just have to wait a bit longer, she thought.

It had been nice, showing off the ring Fenris got her. Aveline, not one given much to jewelry, had admired it and immediately asked if it was enchanted or anything, to give Hawke extra protection out on the field. That caused Hawke to laugh for quite a while; the first thing her friend thought of was fighting benefits. As it turned out, the ring was enchanted; the blue stones weren't just for decoration, but increased the power of her elemental spells, which Hawke appreciated greatly. But, it was still funny that that was the first thing Aveline thought of.

Bethy changed, given a cookie, and back downstairs, Hawke was relieved that Aveline wasn't too put out with her for taking so long.

"It takes as long as it takes with a toddler," Aveline said, with a shrug. "Besides, it's nice to have a little bit of peace and quiet. Your place is just about the only time I get any, lately."

"I find that hard to believe," Hawke replied. "Bethy makes enough noise to easily match the barracks."

"But I'm not having to do paperwork and I'm not having to be 'on' for my men. It's a nice change, that's all I'm saying," Aveline said.

"Are you getting tired of being Guard-Captain already?" Hawke asked her, settling down in one of the armchairs while Bethy sat down with a book and began looking at the pictures.

"Absolutely not," Aveline said. "But it's still nice to have a break once in a while. With all those templars in there now…"

Hawke shuddered. With Meredith in charge, she had templars everywhere, and that included guarding the guards. "Is there no way to kick them out?"

"Not that I've found," Aveline said, shaking her head. "Until we get a real Viscount in office, I'm afraid it's going to be templars all the way down, the way things are looking."

"You would think that Meredith would at least trust the guard to do what's right without templar involvement," Hawke said, settling her chin on her fist and scowling.

"It's probably because we're well known to be friends, and you're well known to oppose the Knight-Commander," Aveline replied, matter-of-factly. "Not that I blame you; Meredith's pushing the mages is making things go too far, as far as I'm concerned. But my job is to protect the people of Kirkwall, and I'm having trouble doing that now because of Meredith's interference."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Hawke asked, crossing her legs. "I realize I'm stuck at home a lot now, but I can leave Bethy with Orana if needed and go out and do whatever needs doing."

"Maybe, Hawke," Aveline said. "Just you being out and the face of the Champion helps a lot, but it also stirs up trouble. I'm not sure which is the best option, actually. But maybe if you were to get out and be seen a little bit more?"

"I've been holed up in here too much, haven't I?" Hawke asked, and Aveline nodded her head.

"I can't blame you. You've got a child now, and a family. You've got other things to think of, besides keeping the city on the straight and narrow. But you're still the Champion."

"Then I'll get out there and see what I can do," Hawke said, matter settled. "Perhaps I can do some good. Although unless Meredith and Orsino stop nearly coming to blows about matters, even me getting out and putting a good face to mages isn't going to help much."

"Thanks Hawke. I knew I could count on you," Aveline said, and stood up. "I've got to get back now. As much as I appreciate the peace and quiet, I can't be gone too long or those templars start to think they can take over."

"'Be gone too long'? Aveline, you've only been gone a few hours!"

"And the paperwork has probably piled up even so. I'll see myself out, Hawke. Until tomorrow," Aveline said, and made her way out of the library. Hawke sighed. Well, she had just signed herself up for… who knows what. Probably a lot of fighting. Fenris was going to love that.

"Mama sad now," Bethy said, and Hawke blinked several times, realizing that she had been staring off into space and thinking hard, completely neglecting her child.

"No, mama isn't sad, pumpkin," Hawke told her, lifting Bethy up onto her lap. "There's just a lot of things going on and it's rather difficult to explain to someone who isn't two years old yet."

"Read me a book," Bethy said, and Hawke was taken aback at how clear her words were getting. She felt that momentary sadness, that quick ache for her baby, and then shoved the feelings away, hard. She would appreciate what she had now and not miss the day when all Bethy could do was lie there and… be an infant.

"That sounds like an excellent idea, my Bethy. Why don't you go pick one of the books out and I'll read it to you?" Bethy crawled off Hawke's lap and went to the bookcase, quickly pulling out one of the larger fairy tale tomes and bringing it to her mother.

Hawke passed the next hour reading with Bethy, purposely avoiding thinking about what she was going to have to do, namely, have a conversation with Fenris about her getting back out there and showing Kirkwall who their Champion was. Fenris hadn't said anything, but she could tell he was pleased with her mostly staying at home these past months and not getting out and doing anything that would put herself in jeopardy. That was going to have to change, apparently, and if anyone could do it, it would be Hawke.

When Fenris came home, bloody and tired from hunting down another group of slavers, Hawke wasted no time in telling him that she would be going out with him from now on, per Aveline's request. Fenris was not best pleased to hear that, and tried to argue with Hawke on the matter, insisting that she needed to stay at home and see to Bethy. But Hawke won out in the end; it was necessary, she said, that the Champion be seen out doing good, especially since the Champion was a mage. It would help ease the tensions, she hoped, and help the citizens fear mages a little bit less.

Fenris certainly didn't care much for that part of the argument, but once he saw that Hawke could not be budged, acquiesced with poor grace on the matter.

"Vishante kaffas, Hawke, you will do as you will, as always. I will remain at your side, regardless."

"I know you will. That's one reason I'm not worried about anything bad happening," Hawke said, taking Fenris's hand in both of hers. He started to jerk away and then sighed and twined his fingers through hers, and then Hawke knew she had won that argument. "Everything will be fine, Fenris."

"I believe you, Hawke. I trust in you."

"Good."