The seaside city of Bodhum.
I know I'm home the moment we step out of the train. The familiar smell of seawater immediately hits us; brought by the gentle, ever-blowing sea breeze. This is the scent I've smelled so many times before, something I've unconsciously missed. The scent of home.
As soon as we walk out of the train station, we can already see the sea gleaming in the distance. Under the bright sunlight, the water surface glimmers like crystals. White waves hit the beach relentlessly, exactly the way they always do even before I got stuck in all this mess.
To see my home looking so normal bewilders me. I've gotten used to travelling with the others, jumping over the foreign terrains and hills of Pulse. Fighting monsters left and right, being vigilant all the times. Facing constant threat of death…
But now, I am in a totally safe and familiar territory. It brings immediate relief and a sense of safety, one that I have somewhat forgotten after all this crazy fighting. I guess Vanille is right after all… Home really is the place where you will always be welcome, no matter how much has changed. Well, if the citizens know what we are, I'm sure they won't welcome us. But at least the place will. This is my home, and it will always welcome me, l'Cie or not. Smiling, I take a deep breath of the salt-smelling air.
"Been homesick all this time?"
I turn around when Fang suddenly chuckles beside me. I give her an embarrassed smile and reply, "I guess so… I just haven't realised it till now."
"Well, at least now you are home. Enjoy the feeling when you can," the huntress says, scratching her head.
"Anyway, where are we going to spend the night?" Sazh suddenly butts in, a hopeful expression in his face. "Hope we can get some cheap hotel with cozy bed to sleep tonight off."
I laugh. "Well, you won't have to do that. Lightning shouted it, didn't she? She wanted you guys to stay at our house."
"Wow, really? We can stay at your place?" Vanille asks, her eyes wide with excitement. "I've never seen your house, even though you've seen mine, Serah!"
"You'll see it soon, don't worry," I smile back at her, amused by her enthusiasm.
"Kinda generous of Light to let us stay at her place, no?" Fang grins. "Never thought the mighty Lightning Farron would let us see her den."
"Frankly, I'm kinda surprised too."
Fang chuckles upon hearing my answer; and with that, we start walking towards town.
Vanille is elated. She has never thought that she'd be able to see Lightning and Serah's house. Sure, she's known them for quite a while and they have become almost as close as family. Both of them have known pretty much everything about her and Fang's life in Oerba before the War of Transgression, have even visited their old house in Oerba; yet she knows next to nothing about their lives. That's why, Vanille is curious about the life Lightning and Serah had in Cocoon, before all this mess start.
Grinning as she tries guessing how their house would look like, Vanille just bounces her way behind Fang. They are walking past the town now, yet luckily no one actually pays attention to them. Just like in Eden Station, everyone is just so busy with their own businesses.
As they walk, Vanille lets her eyes wander around. She can never get used to Cocoon's buildings and other structures, they look so… high-tech. A complete opposite to Gran Pulse's simple villages. All of the buildings here are made of metal, glass, plastic and other materials she cannot recognize. And despite she can see some potted plants and identical trees planted at regular intervals along the road, but the whole city just lacks greeneries. Even the roads have been covered with concrete or metal plates. Kinda depressing, in Vanille's opinion.
However, soon the metal buildings get lesser and lesser as they walk further, following Serah's lead. Before Vanille knows it, they've left the town area and are now walking directly towards the beach. Until finally, all the buildings disappear and Vanille finds herself and the others walking on a winding, narrow and sandy path between two rock cliffs. Somewhere further, she can see the cliffs end and the path opens into a secluded beach.
Vanille tilts her head in confusion. The island seems to end there… so where is Lightning and Serah's house? She has thought that they live in the middle of the town. But the town's already quite a distance behind… Maybe they'd have to take a ferry or something, to the opposite part of the island across the sea, where there is a bigger town?
However, Vanille's guesses are proved wrong when she follows Serah and steps into that secluded beach. She immediately lets out a delighted squeal when she sees the beautiful structure standing there, the one Serah is heading straight up to. Lightning and Serah's house…
The house looks as high-tech as all other Cocoon's sturctures, but there is something different about it, something that emits warmth and elegance. The two-storey building is huge, shaped more-or-less like a peanut with the front door at the middle. It is built a few feet above the ground, supported by two sturdy pillars. One of the pillars is planted firmly on the beach, but the other one is half-submerged in the sea. At first Vanille is concerned about all the waves attacking the pillar, but soon she notices the faint glow of a force field surrounding its base, protecting it from abrasion. Meticulous. Typical Lightning.
Vanille feels her smile grows wider as she follows Serah up a set of stairs to the house's front door. The stair's quite high, considering the position of the building above ground. But the steps are low and easy, so it's not really a problem. As she climbs up the stairs, Vanille also notices the small garden underneath the house. Various flowers are grown there, including a few morning glory plants.
Fang smirks when she sees the morning glories, recalling what Lightning had told her before about Serah planting flowers in their garden. It seems like the li'l pinknette really has a thing for flowers. And she's quite good in taking care of them, judging from how healthy the plants are looking.
Meanwhile, Hope, Snow and Sazh are lining up behind Fang; waiting for Serah to open the door for them. She is punching in a few buttons, entering the password to open it. Security-tight. Just something Lightning would certainly do, Vanille thinks in amusement. But then again, she is actually elated. She is happy to know that Lightning prefers nature enough to build her house in this secluded beach, slightly away from the hustle and bustle of the metallised town of Bodhum. She wonders how the inside of the house looks like…
"Alright, guys, come in. I'll show you around the house, cos I think we're gonna stay here for a while after all," I say, pressing a final button that causes the door to slide open.
Like a desperate refugee, Sazh immediately jostles into thehallway. "Just show me a nice sofa or anything to sleep," he says, yawning.
Vanille giggles as she walks past Sazh. "Do anything you want, old man! But for me, I'd rather look around the place with Serah!"
With that, everyone enters the house.
From the small entrance hallway, the first room of the house is the living room. It is a wide room filled with some white sofa and a big TV. There are other furniture in the room, but Sazh does not pay the least bit attention to them. After I turn the lights on, he immediately heads for the longest sofa and plops himself onto it with a grunt; his face looking extremely relieved.
"Just continue the tour, guys—this old man will just lie here and never stand up again," Sazh announces, before shutting his eyes tightly. Snow eyes him with some kind of envy, clearly wanting to do the same thing.
"You can stay here and get some rest too if you want, Snow. We'll be right back," I say, startling him slightly. But soon his wide grin breaks and he settles on the next sofa, yawning. I walk around the TV and turn the warmer on; now that it's winter, the air gets very cold even in the afternoon like this.
"Look at those two lazy buffoons… can't believe they survive this long," Fang says, looking down at the two men mockingly. She then turns to me.
"Well then, little pink hostess, shall we continue? We can relax, right, since Light is still lagging behind anyway?" Fang grins.
She is right, there is nothing else we can do while waiting for that hothead Light to return. And judging from Fang's carefree attitude, I'm sure that'd mean those soldiers aren't Lightning's match. Finishing them would just be a matter of time… then she'd come back here and I can scold her to my heart's content.
Smiling, I just wave my hand casually and answers, "Sure. Make yourselves at home."
Soon afterwards, Vanille concludes that the living room acts as some kind of a central point in the house. There are three doors leading away from it, so practically they can't get anywhere in the house without passing through this living room. The room is a nice place, though; the white sofa look comfortable and that thing they call TV is significantly bigger than any other Vanille has seen in other Cocoon houses. This room must be where Lightning and Serah spend their free time, whenever Lightning is not working…
From the living room, Serah immediately leads the group to the door on the left. It turns out to be some kind of a study room, with a big book shelf on one side and a couple of sofa plus a table for reading on the center. Hope scans the book shelf and sees that most of the books there are textbooks; must be for Serah's studies. There are also some books about military, though. Lightning's?
However, Vanille is tilting her head in confusion as she sees the large object on the other side of the room. Failing as she tries to figure out the function of this strange object, she turns to ask.
"Umm, what is that big wooden stuff for?" she asks, pointing at the said object. Fang is watching it intently too, not knowing its function.
I just laugh when I see the object Vanille is pointing at. "It's something we call piano, Vanille. We use it to play music!" I answer, smiling as I approach the piano and play a short, cheerful melody.
Vanille squeals happily when she hears it. "Wow, it's nice! I understand now, we do have something like this in Oerba. But not so modern-looking, of course!"
"I never knew you and Light are interested in music, Serah," Hope comments, running his hand on the piano. "I tried learning to play the piano before, but I just can't get it. I quit after a while."
I laugh. "Well, I do like music. The piano is my favourite instrument, though, and I still play it sometimes. But Light… hmm, she isn't really interested in music. She would just stand silently beside me and listen if I play. But I know she likes listening to it, although she can't play a single melody."
"I see… but don't you have a piano stool?" Hope asks, eyeing the long bench in front of the piano.
I just chuckle and shrug when I follow Hope's gaze. "Nope, we don't have a piano stool. We got this long bench from someone, so Light said we shouldn't waste it. I know it's a tad too long for the piano, but I don't really mind. At least it allows both of us to sit side-by-side comfortably whenever I try getting Light to learn playing the piano. Which fails miserably."
Hope chuckles and scrutinizes the 'piano bench' again. "Well, it is comfortable," he says. "And I'm sure that's the only thing Light cares about regarding furniture, right?"
"Yep. She doesn't give a damn about shape or length, as long as it is comfortable."
Vanille laughs too. She doesn't know much about this piano thing, but she enjoys listening to Hope and Serah's exchange.
Fang, meanwhile, is experimenting with the piano; startled when she accidentally presses a particularly high-pitched note.
"Sorry," she grins sheepishly when everyone turns to her.
"Don't worry, this room is soundproof. You won't be waking those 'lazy buffoons' out there even if you play an entire sonata, Fang. Come to think of it, are you interested in music?" I ask her curiously.
However, Vanille immediately bursts out laughing upon hearing my question. She turns to me, still giggling, and says, "Noooo! Fang here can only differentiate a drum's sound from a flute's, but that's as far as her musical ability and interest reach. Gone case!"
I just laugh upon hearing Vanille's answer and see Fang shrugging nonchalantly.
"Well, I'm more interested in hunting," the huntress says, patting the crimson lance on her back proudly. "Stop snickering, Vanille. At least I can differentiate the sharp end of a lance from its blunt one."
Vanille scoffs. "Oh, really? You can? I'm not very convinced, Fang, considering your lance has sharp blades on both ends!"
Fang frowns, giving Hope a death glare as the boy chuckles. But then she realizes that she can't think of any smart comeback to throw at Vanille, so she decides to just change the topic. Ignoring the redhead's smug grin, Fang asks, "Can we just continue the tour?"
Trying to hold in my own laughter as well, I just answer, "Sure."
From the study room, Vanille, Fang and Hope follow Serah to the two doors on the right side of the living room. Serah says one of the doors only leads to the small storeroom which also contains the automated washing machine; so she skips that room. They go through the other door, which is already opened, and Serah turns on the lamps.
Vanille sees that the room is actually the kitchen. Other than all the cabinets, cooking devices and refrigerator, it also has the dining table and a smaller TV hanging from the ceiling. This kitchen also has another smaller door and a staircase, heading to the second floor.
When Vanille asks Serah, she says that the smaller door leads to the first-floor bathroom. However, throughout all the brief time they spent in the kitchen, Fang's eyes never leave the refrigerator. Except for a brief glance at the cookie jars on the table, that is. Vanille giggles softly upon watching her friend staring down at the refrigerator, looking like a hungry puppy with her expression all yearning like that.
"Don't worry, Ms. Starving, I'm sure she'll let us eat something after this," Vanille snickers softly as she walks past Fang.
Fang grins. "Then we'd better hurry, before I drop dead," she whispers back at Vanille, before turning to Serah.
"This kitchen is the last room on the first floor, right? So what's upstairs?"
"Well, there are only our bedrooms upstairs, plus the—"
"Wait!" Upon hearing my last words, Vanille immediately stops me. Her green eyes are uncharacteristically glimmering fiercely, and we all look at her in confusion.
"If that's the case, then the second floor is off-limits to guys!" she states firmly.
Upon hearing this new rule of Vanille's, Fang and I just laugh.
However, Hope seems to take it seriously. He nods in agreement, answering, "Sure, Vanille. I'll tell Snow and Sazh."
Thus, being a polite boy as he is, he says, "Thanks for showing me around, Serah," before swiftly making his retreat back to the living room.
Fang chuckles as Hope's form suddenly disappears. Really, Vanille. Is that rule necessary? But then again, who cares.
"Well, I guess we have the privilege to see the upstairs then?" the huntress asks, raising her eyebrows.
I chuckle. "Sure, let's check the bedrooms' condition… and we'd better make the sleeping arrangement for tonight too, while we are at it."
Fang smirks lazily and falls into steps beside me, while Vanille bounces next to her. We climb the stairs to the second floor together.
As they emerge from the stairs on the second floor, Vanille immediately sees a long hallway stretching to her left. On her right is just a large window, but it is still covered by a sheet of light-orange metal. Must be Cocoon's style of curtain, Vanille muses. Meanwhile, Serah casually presses a button beside it to make the sheet slides up, revealing the scenery of the beach through the crystal-clear glass window. Sunlight rushes in, making it unnecessary for Serah to turn the lights on.
Vanille glances through the window for a while, before casting her gaze back to the hallway. Along the hallway, there are two doors; at the end of the hallway, direct opposite of the window, is another door. Vanille follows Serah towards the first door in that hallway.
"What's this room, Serah?" she asks curiously.
"This is my room," I answer, smiling as I open the door. "Haven't been sleeping in here for a while…"
Then the door opens wide and Vanille smiles as she sees Serah's room for the first time. The room is cheerful and bright, just as how she imagines Serah's room would be.
The room has a big white bed, placed against the center of the wall facing the door; with a small table holding a lamp beside it. On the right side of the room is a book shelf containing thick books, and beside it is a set of study table and chair. The left side of the room has a dark-brown wooden wardrobe with a mirror, and a small door seemingly leading to the bathroom. On the ceiling is some sort of a machine, similar to the one Vanille's seen in the living room. She guesses this one to be a warmer as well.
But what makes the room so cheerful are the paintings of Bodhum's scenery pasted on the walls, the soft woolen rug placed near the door and the decorative ornaments Serah has beautifully arranged on her tables. There are even some birthday cards pasted on the wardrobe, probably from Serah's friends at school. And on the table top… Vanille thinks she sees some pictures there.
"Can I come in?" she turns to ask.
"Sure."
While Serah checks the warmer to see if it's still working, Vanille quickly hops towards the table. Immediately a grin forms on her face as she sees those pictures are of Serah, standing with her friends at school. She looks at one particular picture; it shows four friends smiling widely, looking so cheerful. And written with a black ink on the top right-hand corner of that picture is Serah's neat handwriting: Garnet, Zidane, Rikku and me. School's canteen.
The other pictures show Serah with her other classmates, but mostly depict her with her three friends from that first picture. Without exception, the pictures are full of smiles. Vanille beams too, as she looks up from the table and throws her gaze across the room one more time. Serah really has a lot of friends… Her room is so cheerful; it simply shouts that its occupant leads a happy life.
Meanwhile, Fang is checking out the bathroom, which she finds to be quite big. She raises her eyebrows and asks, "You even have a bathroom in your own room?"
"Um, yes. Lightning also has one in her room…" I answer.
Fang whistles appreciatively. "Wow. Convenient, really. You two seriously have a big and comfy house, yea?"
I chuckle. "Yes, thanks to Lightning."
"By the way, don't you think your bed is a tad too big for one person?" Fang asks again, throwing her gaze to the bed. True, it is big. Vanille is sure it can actually accommodate two or more people.
Upon hearing this question, Vanille observes that Serah looks embarrassed. She smiles nervously before answering. "Uh, yes, you're correct… And the reason is, um… Alright, I know this is childish, but sometimes I ask Light to sleep with me whenever I'm scared or upset—Don't laugh!"
Fang merely smirks, but luckily she doesn't laugh. Vanille, meanwhile, is giggling. "Don't worry Serah, I do that too! Back then in Oerba, whenever I had nightmares… I'd always drag Fang to sleep with me! So don't worry, it's not childish; it's normal!"
Fang laughs upon hearing this. "Yeah, yeah. I can't say I enjoyed those times, though… 'Cos our bed back there was small, unlike yours. And this little monster here keeps kicking around in her sleep. "
Vanille giggles as she sees Serah start smiling again. "But seriously, nice room, Serah! I really like your room, it's beautiful."
"Thanks, Vanille. You know what, you can sleep here tonight with Fang," Serah suddenly offers, pleasantly surprising Vanille.
The redhead gasps. "Oh, really? Thank you!" she squeals in delight. But then she tilts her head, looking hesitant. "But where are you and Lightning gonna sleep, Serah? And the guys?"
"Oh, the guys can sleep in the living room… all those sofa should be sufficient, but I can ask Light to drag out the mattress from the storeroom later, if needed. As for Light and me, we can sleep in her room. I'm quite sure her bed is big enough…"
"Then we'd better check that bed," Fang says, scratching her head. "If it turns out to be too small, I refuse to use your room, Serah. I won't have my hostess sleeping on the floor while I curl up comfortably like a selfish Megistotherian puppy."
I just laugh lightly. Fang really is similar to Lightning. They both talk sharply, but actually they are caring and kind. Ha.
"Alright then, let's check Light's room… it's just next to mine," I say as I open the door for Fang and Vanille.
Vanille skips her way back to the hallway, her curiousity returning.
I wonder… how does Lightning's room look like?
The moment Serah opens the door, Vanille immediately smiles in recognition. This cold yet sweet scent, like the smell of dews on flower petals in the mornings... This really is Lightning's room. It smells just like her.
But then, Vanille suddenly notices something.
Now that she's seen it… Lightning's room is so simple and impersonal, unlike Serah's. Other than the door leading to the bathroom, this room only contains the basic necessities: bed, wardrobe, a set of plain study table and chair, plus a small table by the bed bearing a bland lamp. Besides them, nothing. There is not a single painting, rug, decorative bowl, not even any knick-knack saved for sentimental reasons. Nothing.
Vanille feels her heart tightens.
Didn't she have any friend to at least give her some keepsake before?
The redhead recalls her own room in Oerba. It is destroyed now, but at least she remembers stacking her room with some tables on which she puts photos, decorative bowls, necklaces, Oerban beads and even a statue made for her by one of the elders on her birthday. On the other hand, Lightning's…. Her room feels so barren and cold. Lonely. It is as if the occupant only needs it to sleep, and spends no more time in there.
"She led a boring life before we came along, didn't she?" Fang simply comments as she sees Lightning's neat and simple room.
However, Vanille knows that Fang is disturbed by the room's blandness as well.
If only she can ask.
Lightning…
How was your life before we met you? What happened, that made you become so cold and distant? What happened, to etch that abyss of sorrow and loneliness in your eyes?
She wonders… If she knows what happened, can she help to banish that abyss from Lightning's eyes?
"Yep, if we sleep horizontally, this bed should be big enough! So don't worry, Fang, you can use my room just fine," I say to my two guests, after I scrutinize the size of Lightning's bed.
Fang tilts her head, trying to measure the size as well. Fortunately, she looks satisfied and mutters her 'thanks' along with Vanille's own chirp of gratitude.
"Alright, then, let's go back down and—" I begin, but Fang suddenly yells.
"Whoa, hold on!"
"What is it?" I ask, startled. Fang is approaching Lightning's bed and pulled a white shirt from underneath the sheets. I immediately recognize it as Light's shirt that I prepared there for her, after washing it… It was before all this mess started. Kinda strange to see it still there, really.
Fang, meanwhile, is unfolding the shirt and stares at the logo wide-eyed. She seems to have lost all ability to speak, so Vanille approaches her curiously. However, that is when Fang's laughter bursts, so hard that Vanille jumps back in surprise.
"Hahaha! Oh, for Etro's sake, you've just got to see this, Vanille!" Fang manages to say between her laughter, as she waves the shirt like a flag in front of Vanille's face. The redhead is stunned for a few seconds before she bends down to read the words on the shirt:
"FLAMINGO HAIR"
Immediately Vanille's laughter bursts too. She has never expected Lightning to have this kind of self-joke item. She keeps giggling as she reads the words one more time; trying to imagine Lightning, with her pink hair, wearing this shirt.
Fang is struggling to choke out her words in between her hysterical laughter. "Seriously, Serah. Don't tell me Light actually bought the shirt herself?"
I can't help but laugh too, upon seeing the two Oerbans practically laughing their heads off. But maybe I'd have to save some of Lightning's pride here.
"Actually, no. It was one of my birthday presents for her… a few years back. It was a silly joke I made, just for the sake of teasing her," I explain with a smirk.
"And she immediately agreed to wear it?" Fang asks again, somewhat unbelieving.
That's when a sly smile spreads through my face. "Being Lightning, of course not. She protested and stuff, but I simply told her that I've spent long hours at the shop, trying to pick something for her birthday present. Then I just put on a hopeful expression as I asked her to wear it, threw in an extremely sad face when she argued, aaand… voila. She didn't have the heart to refuse!"
"Wooo, now I'm kinda grateful Vanille isn't as sly as you are, mini pinknette!" Fang snickers, throwing a last glance at the shirt before dumping it back on the bed. "By the way, I'm kinda… s.t.a.r.v.i.n.g…"
I raise my eyebrows, but laugh along with Vanille when we hear Fang's stomach grumbling.
"You really are starving, aren't you? Alright then, let's go down and I'll prepare something for everyone to eat," I say, chuckling.
"You're the best hostess ever," Fang grins, following me walking out of Lightning's room.
Vanille shakes her head and follows Fang, muttering something that distinctly sounds like "Fang, you're acting cute just to get food."
However, as they head for the stairs, Vanille suddenly realizes something. She quickly stops Serah.
"Wait, Serah… what's in that last room?" she asks, pointing at the room at the end of the hallway. It's the only room they haven't seen…
Serah turns to see the room and answers, "Oh, it's the stargazing room… the roof can be opened, and it also has a small balcony facing the sea. You can call that room as Lightning's; she is the one spending a lot of time there. But I don't really go there."
"Wow." Vanille tilts her head, eyeing the room. So Lightning really does like stargazing… she even put a special room in her house. Actually Vanille wants to see the room, but she decides to just wait for Light. Especially since now Fang is almost dead starving, and she is not the only one. Feeling her own stomach grumbling, Vanille just giggles and bounces after Fang and Serah back into the living room. There, with Hope's help, they drag the lazy buffoons to the kitchen.
"Nice food, Serah! You can cook so damn well!" Fang finally manages to look up from her food long enough to speak. Without waiting for answer, the huntress returns to attacking her meal. Beside her, Snow and Sazh are doing the same thing: eating like there is no tomorrow.
I just laugh as I eat my own meal. Vanille and Hope are sitting beside me, and they are enjoying their food too. I don't thoroughly deserve Fang's compliment, though; Hope helped me too with cooking the food just now. He is quite a good cook, actually.
"Come to think of it, how can this food… stay fresh for so long?" Vanille asks, recalling how Serah and Hope simply pulled the foodstuff out of the refrigerator. Doesn't it mean… the food has been staying in there, since before all this mess started? How can it stay good until now?
I exchange glance with Hope, but then remembers that Fang and Vanille are from Gran Pulse. So I just chuckle and explain, "It's because of the refrigerator, Vanille. It's equipped with a device that keeps food fresh for long periods of time."
"Oooh." Vanille nods and continues eating her meal.
However, I suddenly remember that I have not checked the warmer in Lightning's room. Is it still working? It's winter now… if it doesn't work, we'll be frozen at night.
Deciding to check on it, I quickly stand up and say, "Just enjoy your meal, guys. I need to check Lightning's room's warmer for a while. When you're done, just put the dirty plates in the sink, okay? I'll wash them up later."
"I can wash them for you," Hope quickly offers, looking up from his plate.
"Oh… okay, thanks, Hope!" I smile at the boy, before putting my own plate in the sink and head upstairs. However, Vanille stops me.
"Hey, Serah! Can I come with you?"
"Sure," I reply, stopping to wait for her. She quickly bounces towards me and we walk upstairs together.
After I finish checking the warmer, which turns out to be working normally, I look around Lightning's room. There aren't many things in here… I've been here for so many times that I hadn't realized it, but now after I've been away for so long… Now I realize how empty her room is. Empty, just like her eyes that night—
I immediately shake my head to prevent my mind from wandering into that memory.
However, it looks like Vanille noticed my strange behavior. She's giving me a nervous look, so I just smile at her.
Vanille is nervous. The reason she follows Serah up here is because she wants to ask her… but it is undoubtedly a sensitive question… what if she doesn't want to answer?
However, upon seeing Serah's smile, Vanille dares herself to speak up.
"Umm, Serah… actually… I have some questions…" she hesitates, clasping her hands nervously.
"Hmm?"
Vanille opens and closes her mouth again, hesitating. Should she really ask? It's true that she's been wondering for so long, but what if it upsets Serah? She certainly doesn't want to upset her friend. But…
"Just ask me anything, Vanille. I'll answer you," Serah says, seeming confused too upon seeing Vanille's unusual nervous behavior.
Vanille sighs, deciding to just ask away.
"I've been wondering… how was your childhood like, Serah? You and Lightning… I only know little about your childhood; while you two practically know mine and Fang's well enough, War of Transgression and all that. But I hardly know yours. I was just… wondering…"
There. She's asked. Now it's up to Serah whether she wants to answer or not.
I stare for a few seconds at Vanille, somewhat surprised by her question. She wants to know more… about Lightning and me? About our childhood? I don't really mind answering, really, but why does she care? And 'our childhood' comprises Lightning's past too… would she be mad if I tell Vanille without her agreement like this?
But then Vanille speaks again quickly. "I mean, it's okay if you don't want to answer it, Serah! I was just wondering, since I know very little about you and Lightning… the only personal thing I know about Light is just what that lightning pendant means to her, and—"
"Wait!" I stop Vanille there, unable to believe my ears. "Who… I mean, how… did you know that thing about Light's necklace?"
"Umm, she told me and Fang during our journey to Zalera…"
I stare at Vanille for a moment, before deciding to ask her first before answering.
"Well, Vanille, why don't you tell me everything about your journey to Zalera first? I've been wondering too…"
"Eh? Oh, um, sure!"
After listening to Vanille's story, I can't help but feeling happy. Lightning really has found good friends; that journey to Zalera must have allowed her to know Fang and Vanille better, and vice versa. No wonder now she seems to have gotten used to Fang's antiques and teasing. No wonder Vanille seems to understand and care about Light a lot, like that time in Zalera when she asked me to stop Light.
But the most surprising thing is… Lightning willingly told them something about her past. It wasn't much, it was just about her necklace and name—but I know they are highly-personal subjects to Lightning. She's never told anyone about them before. Before this, only I know about those things...
But now, Light has actually told Fang and Vanille. By herself. It clearly proves that she trusts them… And if she does… then maybe I should just tell our story to Vanille. I suppose Light won't mind.
Smiling, I gesture for Vanille to sit down. She quickly sits on the chair, while I sit on the bed.
"Well, I don't mind telling you, Vanille. But how much do you know about our childhood, anyway?"
Upon hearing this, the redhead huffs in relief. Luckily Serah doesn't seem to be offended by her question… and she seems to be willing to answer. Really, Vanille has no hidden agenda; she is asking just because she wants to know Lightning and Serah better. Then maybe, maybe she can help Lightning too... Because the soldier has saved her so many times, and Vanille just wants to do something to help her back.
Thus, Vanille replies Serah, "Umm, I only knew that Lightning took care of you since little… since your parents… uh, sorry, passed away?"
"Right, so what else do you want to know?"
"Um, whatever you feel like telling me!"
I just smile softly at her. "Well, then, you'll have to listen to a rather long story."
Vanille grins. "It's okay, I have nothing else to do anyway. Especially now that Fang and the others are still busy stuffing themselves down there."
I chuckle. And with that, I begin recalling that night… That night when everything turned awry for Lightning and me.
It was the worst night in my life. No matter what I do, I can never be able to forget that night.
Right. It was the night when we received the news of our parents' death, the news that changed our lives forever.
I couldn't believe it at that time. I was sure that it was just some kind of a sick joke; I kept forcing myself to think that Mom and Dad would go home any time soon.
But they never did.
They were gone so suddenly; I just saw them in the morning, preparing to leave for a business trip in Palumpolum. And they were perfectly okay that time, still joking and laughing. Dad even picked me up briefly, grinning as he told me to be a good girl.
But then there we were, receiving news that their car had crashed and they passed away. Just like that.
At that time I believed we basically have no more future. None I could see, at least. I was so aghast, so frightened and despaired. All I did was crying, calling Mom and Dad. I just couldn't accept that I wouldn't see them anymore, that I would never be able to count on them for my safety and well-being anymore. More than anything, I was extremely frightened to think about our future. What are we going to do next? Without our parents, we surely won't be allowed to live in our apartment anymore. Then how about our studies? How are we going to survive?
Because right at that moment, our comfortable lives totally turned upside-down. Our parents, our safety, our future… Simply everything we had was stripped off so suddenly, so mercilessly.
All those thoughts kept gnawing in my mind, incapacitating me with their starkness. I could only keep crying, clinging tightly to the last family member I have. Lightning.
She didn't cry. She just stood there; hugging me tightly, my only anchor in that crumbling world.
While I was crying my eyes out, Lightning didn't even shed a single tear. She simply stared emptily at the air, without showing any emotion. I felt somehow grateful for that, though; if she succumbed to sadness like I did, I would've probably felt even more frightened, not having anyone to count on. But Lightning controlled her emotion, she remained strong for me. My firm, silent anchor, who said nothing but kept hugging me close in her arms, preventing me from crumbling to pieces.
That night was the last time we could sleep in our apartment. We would be sent to the orphanage on the other side of Bodhum on the next day. It was so far away from our apartment, on the part of town we've never been to before. We'd be foreigners there, new and unwanted. I really didn't want to go there… I was scared… but we simply had no choice.
I kept clinging to Lightning that night, even as we were trying to get some sleep in our dark room. Suddenly I realized how alone we were then, how she was the only person I have in this merciless world. If she wasn't there with me, I wouldn't survive. Suddenly the thought of losing Lightning became scarier than anything and I couldn't help but sobbed.
I buried my face in the nape of Lightning's neck, trying to shut the cruel world out. Trembling with grieve and fear, I whispered to her.
"Don't ever leave me… stay with me."
My sobbing intensified and I can feel tears running down my face again, against Lightning's shoulder. I was wondering why she hadn't said anything, I almost felt angry at her lack of emotion and her so-be-it demeanor.
But when she answered me, I somehow began thinking that everything would one day work out for us.
"…Always."
Upon hearing that word—that promise—from her, I immediately felt calmer. Because Lightning always keeps her promises… That's right, even though Light didn't comfort me with soothing words, but her actions defeated every word in the world. Like her effort to put up a strong front for me, just so I could have someone to rely on.
I snuggled closer to her, half-asleep. Somehow, knowing that she'll always stay with me made me feel so… safe, despite the grimness of our situation. That's the kind of feeling that only Lightning can bring.
At least I still have her… Slowly my tears stopped flowing, and I fell asleep in her arms. She really was my steadfast anchor, firm and strong.
But much later that night, I think I heard her start crying too.
Because unlike me who had her as my anchor, Lightning had no one to count on. She was completely alone; shouldering all the responsibilities and struggling against all odds to keep not only herself, but also myself, alive and well in the merciless world. It was that struggle that forced her to grow those constant seriousness, cold demeanor and stoic expression of hers.
But really, all along Lightning was just burying her sorrows and loneliness inside—unresolved and uncomforted.
A/N: Next chapter would immediately continue with the flashbacks, guys, so don't get confused ^^
Oh, and I developed the structure of Lightning and Serah's house from the brief description of it on Final Fantasy Wiki.