Author's Note:
Fair warning that I know nothing about child-rearing so anything from here on out in regard to Draco's care might not be 100% accurate and I apologize, lol. I have cat babies, not real ones.

CHAPTER THIRTY SIX
Summer, 1980

"Push!"

A loud, feral-like scream ripped from the back of Narcissa's throat as sweat poured from her brow, her entire nether regions feeling like she was being ripped apart. Every curse in the book was shouted at the bloody Healers who had refused to give her something for the pain out of fear that it would interact badly with the anti-psychotics she was on. This was the first time Narcissa had heard about this though, but by the guilty look on Lucius' face after she had found out, that was apparently on purpose.

Fucking lying arse. If he even tried to hold her hand during this, Narcissa would be sure to break every single one of his fingers.

Of course if Narcissa was thinking rationally she'd understand why he kept it from her; she already knew how painful birth was before she ultimately started screaming at her husband for the potions, so if she was aware ahead of time that she wouldn't be allowed to have them at all this time, she no doubt would have wanted to temporarily wean herself off of her medication. But Narcissa wasn't thinking rationally and so really, her only competent thought at that very moment was how much she'd like to remove his goddamn bollocks.

"Just keep breathing, Mrs. Malfoy; that's it… you're doing great! Just in and out," one of the Healers coached in this annoyingly chipper voice that made Narcissa want to punch a fucking wall. She wished she could have done a home birth again, but she couldn't do it at her own place because of memories from the last one, and Bellatrix wouldn't allow her to do it in her house because of the 'bloody cleanup'.

Selfish.

Speaking of though, her sister was still not there and she was about to birth her child and, God, she didn't want to do this without her. This baby might be Lucius', but Bellatrix was as much a part of this child's life as he was, and she just… she couldn't not be there for this!

"Don't—bloody tell me to breathe!" Narcissa shouted, her cheeks red and her hair sticking to her forehead as she tried to shove the Healer away from her. "I don't fucking want you—don't need you… where the hellis my sodding sister, Lucius?!"

Lucius already looked like he was going to pass out from what was currently going on between his wife's legs, but if it were possible, Narcissa's tone caused him to become even paler. "She's… not here yet," he responded tentatively, as though he were afraid Narcissa would be able to curse his head from his bloody body just from a mere look.

"Then find her!" Narcissa shrieked, her nails digging into the cushioning beneath her as her brow etched in pain. She tried to ignore it though, tried to brace herself through it as she glared at her husband, demanding him to just… to just bloody accommodate her wishes right now! Was that so hard to do?

But he didn't. He couldn't.

"I'm not—Narcissa, I'm not missing the birth of my bloody child!" he shouted, looking at her like she had to be insane for even suggesting such a thing. He might be terrified of her right now, he might be nauseous and pale and unsure if he could even handle watching said birth due to his distaste for blood and gore, but in the end, some things were far more important. "She'll be here, I assure you, now just—just push, Narcissa, please! You can't hold the baby inside of you just to wait for her!"

"I can and I bloody well will," Narcissa snapped through labored breaths, just as another contraction ripped its way through her uterus. She screamed.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Malfoy, but this baby is coming now," the Healer warned her, not allowing Narcissa to disillusion herself. "It's not going to wait until you're ready, so I suggest you help it along its way or else you may end up causing irreparable damage to both your and your baby's health. Please do not fight your body's natural response."

Narcissa's eyes began to fill with tears and her head hit the pillow behind her heavily. She knew she couldn't do anything that might harm this child because this one, she had to do it right with this one, and yet Bellatrix wasn't there and having this baby without her just seemed wrong. She hated this. She hated every second of it and yet when Lucius' hand covered hers and she looked up at him, his pleading gaze meeting hers, she knew she did not have a choice in the matter.

She killed her last child. She would not harm this one. She couldn't.

Labor after that was little more than a blur. The pain bled into more pain, more screams and more tears, and Narcissa wasn't entirely sure she was even fully conscious when the baby was finally delivered, as nothing even seemed or felt even remotely real anymore. She didn't take any potions and yet she couldn't seem to feel anything anymore as the light above her head blinded her, and as Narcissa squinted and tried to remember what was going on, all she could hear was a baby wail and a grown man sob with relief and love and happiness.

"It's a boy! Narcissa—Darling, we have… we have a son!" Lucius cried, and in that moment Narcissa realized the weight of what had actually happened, of what they just did, of what it meant, and relief and joy washed through her like a wave as she too came back to reality, and began to cry.

She could hear a spell being uttered in the distance, no doubt the Healers cleaning up her… her son, and all Narcissa wanted to do was scream, "Give him to me! I don't care that he's covered in blood, give me my boy, give me my child!" because she needed to know that he was real, that this had truly happened, but she was too weak, her voice was too hoarse, and all Narcissa could do was just lie there as tears streamed down her cheeks in lines.

But then he was in her arms. This wailing, tiny, bald little thing was passed to her by a Healer and God, Narcissa didn't care in that moment for anything else, because she could feel him. She could feel him and she could see him and my God, he was real. He was real and he was hers. Thiers. Forever.

They had a son.

They had a son.

[x]

Draco Lucius Malfoy. That was his name.

When Narcissa was aborting her first child at a very young age, she had disclosed to her sister the name of her son, should she ever have one. Draco, the dragon. He would be strong, fierce; a force of nature. Beautiful, and yet utterly frightening. It reminded Narcissa of Bellatrix at the time and even though she was utterly infuriated with her sister for missing her son's birth, she could not bear changing the name now. Her son was Draco, he had been for a very long time, and so Draco he would be. Lucius, thankfully, approved of the name, and his only request was that he was able to pass on his own to his son as well, as that was something he had dreamed of for a very long time.

And so with that, their son had a name worthy of a pureblood.

It was a few hours after the birth that Narcissa finally was able to fall asleep, although it was more that she passed out from sheer exhaustion than a conscious decision on her part. She didn't want to leave Draco, even just to sleep, but as her eyelids became heavy, Lucius assured her that he would look after their boy while she finally got some much-needed rest. Narcissa didn't know how long she was out for, but she awoke when she felt someone gently brushing the hair from her face.

She opened her eyes and immediately jerked away from the hand.

"Cissy…" Bellatrix tried, knowing instantly that her presence was not welcome. The corners of her mouth were creased down into a frown, her hair looking wind mussed and clothes dirt-stained. Narcissa didn't know where she was coming from, but she did know that wherever it was, it was certainly at His behest.

And that really showed her true priorities, didn't it?

"No," Narcissa breathed, anger rising up inside of her by just the mere sight of her sister in her hospital room. "No, you—get out! Get the hell out, Bella!"

"Cissy, come on, you know I—"

But Narcissa didn't want to hear her excuses. "No, you… you missed the birth of my son!" she shouted, more infuriated than she thought she had ever been in her entire life. "You knew how important this day was to me and you—where the hell is Lucius? Where is Draco?! Get them and then get the hell out, Bella, I don't want to see you right now!"

"Oh, relax, I sent them both out of the room so I could talk to you. They're not far," Bellatrix told her with a little exasperated sigh. She paused for a moment then before musing, "'Draco', is it? I remember why you wanted to name your son that so long ago. You can't be too cross with me if you still decided to name him something that reminded you of me."

"This isn't about you," Narcissa seethed, sitting up straighter in her bed. "Or is that why you decided not to come? Because you realized that with the birth of my son, you'd no longer be my main priority? You're so bloody selfish I don't even know where to begin."

Bellatrix outright rolled her eyes at that. "Come on, Narcissa, you know as well as I that if I was able then I would have been here. But we are in the middle of a war and… and there is something going on that—" Bellatrix tried, but then seemed a little flustered and instead of properly explaining, snapped, "Look, sometimes the war just bloody conflicts with the time I'd like to spend with my family, alright? I'm sorry, but what's done is done. Now are you going to continue to bitch at me, or would you like to formally introduce me to your offspring?"

Narcissa scoffed, averting her gaze as her brow set heavily. "I'm sorry, are you saying you actually care to meet him?" she challenged before allowing her eyes to set once more on her sister. Her glare deepened. "Because calling Draco my 'offspring' seems like a very detached way of saying 'child'. Besides, you already sent him out of the room without a care to even ask Lucius his name. That doesn't exactly sound like you give anything remotely resembling a shit, honestly."

"Oh, shut it. Of course I want to meet my nephew; he is a part of you after all, is he not? I may not know what to do with him or even if I could keep him alive should you ever actually expect for me to watch him on my own, but I think I could manage to hold him without dropping him, at the very least."

Narcissa's eyes narrowed. "You really do not inspire much confidence, do you know that?"

Bellatrix merely shrugged. God, she hated her sometimes.

Still, as angry as Narcissa was, she really wanted to see her son now that she was awake, and she knew better than to think that Bellatrix would actually leave before getting what she came here for, which apparently was forgiveness. Since that didn't seem to be happening any time soon, Narcissa didn't have much choice but to allow the woman to see her nephew, even though all she wanted to do was hide Draco away just to spite her. At least for a little while.

"Fine," she seethed, hating having lost this battle. "Find Lucius and tell him to bring Draco back in here. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to allow you to hold him though, so I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you."

Bellatrix shot her a look that clearly said, 'We'll see about that,' before exiting the room to do as she was told. And Narcissa didn't know what else she was expecting honestly, as she knew her sister never fully respected her wishes if they contradicted with her own, but when she arrived back in the room with Draco in her arms and Lucius trailing behind her, Narcissa slammed her hand down on the mattress in a frustrated huff.

"What the bloody hell did I just say?!"

"Oh, calm down, it's not as though I'm going to break him," Bellatrix dismissed as she peered down at the tiny bundle in her arms, a look that Narcissa couldn't decipher etching across her sharp features. The blonde exhaled an irritated breath before shooting her glare over towards her husband.

"What?" Lucius asked, looking as though he suddenly realized he might have been missing something. "She said you wanted her to meet Draco. Did you not?"

"Of course I—!" Narcissa began in a huff before she reevaluated what she was going to say and responded instead with, "I did—I do, but I didn't want her bloody holding him. I'm still furious with her, which you should be well aware of!"

"Narcissa, come on," Lucius tried, which was the most infuriating part of it all. She hated when Lucius stuck up for Bellatrix; calling a truce was one thing, but for them to actually vouch for one another was quite another altogether. "The reason I was able to be at my son's birth was because of her, alright? She convinced the Dark Lord she could do what he requested all on her own, so don't blame her for not being here; we both honestly thought that she'd be back in time for the birth anyway. She didn't intentionally miss it."

Narcissa set her jaw, narrowing her eyes as she glanced over at her sister suspiciously. "…Is that true?"

"Yes, and you're welcome, by the way."

Ugh. Damnit. Now she didn't have a leg to stand on, and that infuriated Narcissa even more.

Bellatrix was still staring down at Draco, her nose beginning to crinkle a bit as she assessed the situation. "He's a bit… wrinkly and ugly, don't you think? You sure he's yours?"

Narcissa's mouth dropped open in offense. "He is not ugly! Oh my God, Bella, how could you even say something like that? Give him to me!"

"Oh, relax; did you miss the 'are you sure he's yours' part?" Bellatrix rhetorically responded, shooting her sister an exaggerated eyeroll. "It was meant as a compliment. To you, anyway; not the baby. Is this just how they look after they're popped out, or is this a permanent thing? You might want to look into beautification charms if it is, just in case."

"Alright, that's enough," Lucius snapped irritably, stepping towards Bellatrix with his arms out. "Give him here; neither of us wants to stand around here all day and listen to you insult our son. You should know damn well that newborns aren't the most beautiful creatures around, or else you're just plain thick-headed. Neither would surprise me, honestly."

"Do I look like a goddamn wet nurse to you?" Bellatrix snapped as she handed the child back to Lucius, who in turn gave Draco to Narcissa, who was looking at the boy like she couldn't bear to be away from him for another second. "How the fuck am I supposed to know?"

"Question answered, then."

While Bellatrix scoffed and shot Lucius the finger, Narcissa couldn't be arsed to even pay attention to the two of them. Draco was in her arms now and all she could do was stare down at the tiny thing in wonder and amazement. They had created this… this small little person. They created those tiny fingers, those bitty toes. When… when her daughterwas born, rest her beautiful soul, Narcissa had only seen but a glimpse of her before she was taken away. Draco though, he was here to stay and should she want to, she could spend every last moment of her life just staring down at him, wondering how she got so lucky as to have this boy enter her life.

It felt too good to be true.

What didn't feel too good to be true however was their visit with Abraxas Malfoy about a month following Draco's birth. The man was a sickening green from the Dragon Pox and so frail that he could no longer leave his bed and yet even still Abraxas was just as frightening as Narcissa remembered. It had been years since she had seen her father-in-law, and for good reason.

He did not like her.

"Is that him?" Abraxas asked, his judgmental gaze resting on the bundle in Narcissa's arms as she hovered by the doorway, careful not to get too close. Although Dragon Pox was only contagious through skin-to-skin contact, she still didn't want to get anywhere near him; especially while she had Draco close to her breast.

"No, Father, that's just a doll we picked up at the store on the way here," Lucius responded dryly, causing Narcissa to shoot her husband an alarmed look. She knew Lucius no longer feared his father, but blatant disrespect wasn't something he should be exercising either, even if the man couldn't physically get out of bed anymore to beat his son with his cane. "Of course this is him. We know you have no desire to see either one of us, but Narcissa and I assumed at the very least that you may want to meet your grandson before…" He trailed off then though, looking a little uncomfortable with voicing out loud that Abraxas may very well die soon.

Abraxas did not voice it either. Instead he just shot Narcissa a scathing look and said, "Well, at least now we know she isn't barren. It had been so long since your marriage I assumed she was just as defective as that sister of hers. I do hope you don't socialize with that woman, Lucius; there are so many nasty rumors surrounding that sister-in-law of yours. It's bad enough you already have one Black woman in your life."

Narcissa's jaw clenched so hard that the veins in her neck began to protrude a little, but she said nothing. She knew better.

"Father, if you insist on continuing to insult Narcissa or her family, it may be better for all of us if we just left," Lucius warned him, firmly standing beside his wife without even a waver of hesitation. My, had he grown. "Now do you wish to know the name of your grandson, or should we see our way out?"

"Yes, yes, fine," Abraxas waved off, still looking highly disinterested and yet for some reason, wanting them to stay. He coughed then, sparks coming out of his nose, and Narcissa took a big step backwards as she clutched Draco to her chest. "But I hope it's nothing… frilly like the name of a bloody star or some such nonsense."

Because Abraxas knew that the entirety of the Black family (minus Narcissa of course, which caused a great bit of inner turmoil for her when she was a child) was named after stars. So of course their son's name couldn't follow the Black tradition, because he was a Malfoy.

Fuck him, honestly.

Lucius however, just sighed softly. "We named him Draco, Father. Yes, after a star, but the fiercest in all the sky. And before you say anything about how shameful it is that I'm raising a Black instead of a Malfoy, let me assure you that his second name is my own and that his surname is decidedly ours, although that's more to do with my own pride than the pride I have in our family right now, especially after seeing the way you're acting towards your own grandson."

Abraxas said nothing to that, but instead stared down his son like he wasn't quite sure who he was anymore. It was clear that no matter who Lucius was now though, Abraxas liked him even less than he did when his son was a boy.

"Forget it; this was a foolish idea," Lucius said, placing a hand on the small of his wife's back to encourage her to leave with him. He looked back at Abraxas though and said, "I do hope you change your mind about my family before it's too late, Father. This was all I ever wanted ever since I was a little boy, and if you can't find it within yourself to be happy for me, then perhaps it really was for the best that we ended up distancing ourselves long ago."

And then that was it.

Abraxas died a few weeks later, and while Narcissa expected her husband's sadness, it never came. She knew Lucius felt so very disconnected from his father which, quite honestly, she could relate to, but considering Lucius had made an actual effort to reconnect, Narcissa had assumed that on some level, he had actually cared. And perhaps he still did, but in the end, it seemed Lucius had accepted that his relationship with his father would never be repaired, and so when the day came that Abraxas finally passed, Lucius decided not to mourn the loss of something he knew he never had.

But that didn't mean all was well either.

Something had been happening lately, something bad. Narcissa could see it in her husband's eyes when he came home, she could see it in the paleness of his face and the growing gauntness in his cheeks. She could see it in her sister; could see it in Bellatrix's erratic behavior and constant snapping every time Narcissa asked if she could come by, even for just a bit. If she hadn't noticed Lucius' behavior she would have chalked it up to Bellatrix and her jealousy over Draco, but that wasn't it.

It was definitely something else.

Which was why one day Narcissa finally snapped, in the middle of breastfeeding of all the damn things, as she cradled her son's head in her breast and exclaimed to her husband and sister, "Will one of you please tell me what the hell has been going on lately!? I'm sick of this little charade you keep putting on; it's not even convincing anymore!"

Both of her lovers clearly started at the unexpected exclamation, causing them to turn away from whatever weird, silent conversation they seemed to be having with their gaze and with the large grandfather clock in the corner, to finally face the woman they didn't even seem to want to be around anymore. They were always on edge, always seemed like they had one foot out the door and while Narcissa tried to ignore it for Draco's sake, she couldn't anymore.

Draco was barely bothered by the loud exclamation though and continued suckling away at his mother's breast. He did tend to have this awful habit of doing it much too hard sometimes, but Narcissa grit through the pain and bore it, as being lovers with Bellatrix of all people made her used to so much more anyway.

"Narcissa, darling, we're not—"

"Do either of you even want to be here with me?" Narcissa challenged, shifting her position in her rocking chair so she could sit up a little higher. "Because neither of you seem like it anymore."

"Come on, Cissy, don't be dramatic; it's nothing," Bellatrix tried to assure her. "There's just a lot going on right now with the war and—"

"I get that, I'm not an idiot," Narcissa shot back, effectively cutting off her sister mid-sentence. "What I'm asking is, what specifically is going on in the war right now, because last I heard we had a mole inside the Order and were on the crux of winning, but now every time either of you come back from seeing Him you end up looking worse than when you left!"

Lucius pursed his lips and stayed silent, his gaze flickering over to Bellatrix.

The other woman was quiet for a long moment, looking over her sister before it seemed she realized that perhaps it was for the best if she just told her. Exhaling a defeated sigh, Bellatrix finally admitted, "…There's been a prophecy."

Narcissa immediately sat up straighter, not liking the way Bellatrix said that.

"There's been a what?"

Bellatrix chewed on the inside of her cheek for a second, her expression settling into frustration. "Early in the year, one of our own heard a prophecy that predicted the downfall of our Lord. I do not know who heard it as He has not revealed that to us yet, nor has He told us what the entire prophecy even entails. From what I gather though, whoever heard it did not overhear the entire thing anyway. Still, it's got the Dark Lord rather… unhinged. I bloody told Him though that prophecies could be overturned and that nothing's written in fucking stone until it damn well happens but He did not… take kindly to my advice. He's paranoid and he's angry and if we don't find out who this damn thing is talking about—!"

"I'm sorry, 'who'?" Narcissa asked, feeling her chest tighten in a way that didn't have anything at all to do with the way Draco was going at her raw nipples. "What the bloody hell do you mean, 'who'? Someone specific is supposed to be his downfall? How can that even be possible?"

Wasn't Voldemort supposed to be the most powerful wizard in the world? How could one mere person take him down when even the entire Order could not?

And it wasn't as though there wasn't a part of Narcissa that wished she could live a life without the Dark Lord invading every bloody fucking aspect of it, but now her family was too tied into his regime. If he fell, then they would all fall. Narcissa couldn't bear that happening, and so she started to grow frightened as she clutched her child to her breast.

"It's not, that's what I've been trying to bloody tell Him!" Bellatrix practically shouted, looking frustrated. "A grown wizard couldn't take him down, let alone some bloody child that's meant to be born in this coming week! It's absolutely sodding ridiculous, and yet—!"

"A baby?" Narcissa scoffed, finding that as preposterous as her sister, which at least made her calm down a little. "That's… that's madness, no child can be born with that kind of power. It's impossible."

"Children grow up, Narcissa," Lucius reminded her softly, causing the blonde's gaze to finally land on her husband. "Perhaps this prophecy won't be fulfilled in a week or even a year from now, but one day it could be. If the Order finds out and hides the child well enough, we all could be looking over our shoulders for a very long time. That is why the Dark Lord is concerned."

"We'll find the bloody thing long before it comes to that," Bellatrix responded, her answer very self-assured. "Even if the Order does realize who it is and hides the baby, we still have a mole. Eventually they'll slip up and we'll be at their doorstep. It's only a matter of time."

The baby.

Those words finally hit Narcissa like a freight train and her throat closed up as she looked down at her own son, whose now-full stomach was causing his eyelids to weigh heavy as he drifted off into sleep. The baby. The baby they planned to find before he or she grew up and could vanquish the Dark Lord. The baby they planned to murder.

Narcissa suddenly felt a little sick.

"Narcissa, darling, don't humanize it," Lucius requested softly, noticing the look on his wife's face as he knelt down before her, placing a gentle hand on her knee. "It will only make it worse, and you know what has to be done. If we do not, our whole world collapses. You and Draco will be left alone, and that is our best-case scenario."

"…I know," Narcissa whispered, the tightness in her throat making it hard to raise her voice to a more audible decibel. She still wouldn't tear her gaze away from Draco. "But I'm just… sick of letting children die for him, Lucius. It's too much. This happens too damn much…"

Narcissa closed her eyes, a tear falling down the corner of her cheek as she thought of Aquila, who's sacrifice she still didn't fully understand. But she couldn't do this here in front of them right now and so she quickly wiped the wetness from her cheek with her sleeve as she nudged her husband out of the way with her knee before getting to her feet. "I need to… I have to put Draco down. Excuse me."

Clutching her son to her chest she shuffled past them and up the stairs, hearing her husband sigh heavily before Bellatrix told him, "Just leave it; it was my solution to her first-born problem that fucked her up, so just let me… I'll deal with it. Was our fucking kid anyway."

Narcissa scurried into the nursery and closed the door behind her despite knowing she had her sister coming up behind her. There was a part of her that hoped Bellatrix would realize the closed door meant she wanted to be alone, but even if Bellatrix did understand that, she certainly didn't respect it.

No surprise there though.

The door opened just as Narcissa was gently trying to coax Draco to burp. She hated having to do this because he always fell straight asleep after a meal and she felt bad for waking him, but it was better than him waking up much later and shrieking due to gas pains. Narcissa's eyes were still wet with tears and when she looked up at her sister she glared at her, obviously wanting her privacy and annoyed that she did not get it. "I'm fine, you didn't have to come up here."

"And yet, unfathomably, here I am," Bellatrix deadpanned. Her brow quirked as she added, "Don't pretend like you didn't huff away so you could get my attention. You've always done that."

"I'm not a child anymore, Bellatrix; and maybe it took me longer than it should have for me to fully mature, but believe me, my leaving the room was not for attention. I wanted space, which you did not respect. As usual."

Bellatrix shrugged, looking unperturbed. It was then that Draco burped and spit up a little, causing Bellatrix's nose to wrinkle in disgust. "Why you always wanted one of these things, I'll never understand. The thing just yacked all over you."

"Do not call my son a 'thing'," Narcissa responded dangerously, glaring at her as she removed the burping cloth from her shoulder and threw it in the hamper. Anger, resentment, and sadness building up inside of her, Narcissa felt her eyes burn hot with unshed tears once more as she laid her son down in the bassinet, watching Draco's eyes already begin to close once more. "But I suppose that must be how you see all children, isn't it? As things. Why it was so easy for you to allow that monster to murder our fucking daughter, and why you don't care at all about this other bloody child. They're nothing to you, aren't they? They're all nothing."

"Hey," Bellatrix responded strongly, grabbing her sister's arm and forcing her to spin around to face her. Narcissa was looking at her like she couldn't stand the sight of her in that moment, but Bellatrix didn't look very pleased with her either. "Look, I never pretended I would be anything other than a shit mum, but if you honestly think for one bloody second that I wouldn't have tried if we had gotten to keep her, then you're a bigger fucking moron than I thought," Bellatrix spat, apparently offended by what Narcissa thought was a completely accurate picture of the way her sister thought in regards to children.

"I'm not going to let you shit on me for the rest of our life because of that child," Bellatrix continued heatedly. "I did what I had to do to save you, and I do not and will not ever regret that, do you understand me? And so now, once again, there's another bloody child standing in the way of not fucking up your life, all of our lives, so yeah, I'm going to do what I have to. And you can cry and think I'm shit for that all you want, Cissy, but that doesn't change the truth, so I'd appreciate it if you learned to just shut the fuck up about it."

Narcissa was actually taken aback by that and her mouth dropped open a little as she stared at her sister, unable to really formulate a response. So instead she just shot her a scathing look and pushed her away before turning, intent on just leaving. Bellatrix had other plans though and suddenly she was grabbed and pushed a bit unceremoniously against the dresser, the force of it knocking the wind out of her for a second. Narcissa looked up at her, her chest heaving anger and her eyes ablaze.

"If you wake Draco, so help me…"

"I'm not going to wake up your precious child, okay?" Bellatrix hissed, her face much too close. "Do you think I don't fucking understand what being a mother means to you? I may have ruined it the first time, but I don't bloody plan to put on a repeat performance, so maybe instead of fucking resenting me because of my mistakes, give me a chance to rectify them."

"Because I swear to you, Cissy, I will never let anything happen to that boy," she continued, and the actual conviction in her voice made Narcissa's heart clench in her chest, making her feel something other than rage, even for a brief moment. "Do you understand me? I may not get the appeal of him right now, but at the moment he's small and a bit useless and I don't really know what to do with him. But eventually he'll get older and if you want I'll teach Draco every bloody thing I know so that even if he does end up growing up in an endless war, he'll know how to defend himself. And until that day I'll protect him with my fucking life, so why don't you do me a favor and stop looking at me like the bad guy, because I'm sick of it. I'm trying. I'm fucking trying."

Narcissa was silent for a long moment, her anger beginning to subside with each passing moment. She pursed her lips and looked up at Bellatrix, feeling a little guilty for always jumping down her throat. "…I'm sorry," she responded eventually, voice soft. "I know you are. I know. And I… I appreciate what you're trying to do, because I know children are so wildly out of your element. You haven't really known what to do now that Draco is in the picture, and I can see that. You haven't even tried to get me into bed lately, you've just… given me space to be a new mother, and that was… more than I expected, honestly."

Bellatrix was pretty much hard-wired for sex, so Narcissa knew how hard that must be for her. Still, she appreciated it, because her mind had clearly been on other things lately.

"I just… I'm just tired of all the death and destruction this war has brought us, Bella," Narcissa whispered, sounding so incredibly exhausted by it all. "I just want it to end."

"And it will," Bellatrix promised her, hands sliding down the length of her sister's arms as she gently rested her forehead against the blonde's. "But getting there isn't going to be pretty. I understand how fucked off you think all of this is – that we're going to be actively hunting for a child – but we don't have any other choice. If this child really does have the power the prophecy foretold, it'll uproot all of our lives. If He falls, we all do. Your whole world will be torn apart."

"…I know," Narcissa breathed, feeling like an awful person for saying that out loud. She closed her eyes, feeling rather defeated. She didn't want an innocent child to die, but what choice did any of them have? "Just… promise me that you'll be careful," she softly pleaded, bringing her hand up to gently cup her sister's face. "If you go after a child… the world won't take very kindly to you."

"They don't take kindly to us anyway, Cissy."

True.

Narcissa pursed her lips before looking back up to her, hating the things her sister did but understanding that she did them because she believed them to be best for them, for their family. Leaning up, she gently pressed a kiss to Bellatrix's lips, feeling her sister exhale a small breath at the gesture. Narcissa hadn't realized it until now, but it really had been quite awhile since she last kissed her. She had just been so wrapped up in Draco, in being a mother, that she hadn't really had time for anything or anyone else. She was beginning to regret that now.

And so Narcissa pressed her lips against hers a little harder, her hand coming up to wrap in a mess of dark curls as she indulged herself with a child-murderer because, in the end, Bellatrix was so much more than that. She was so much more than all the bad things she had done, so much more than chaos and destruction and pain.

Narcissa needed to remember that. She needed to relive that, if only for a moment, because if she didn't, she would hate her.

She would hate her so very, very much.

TBC…