"Good morning, Akira!"
"Good morning, Misa."
"So how're things going between you and Light-kun?"
"Things are going okay."
"Uh-huh… You makin' any progress yet?"
"Kind of…"
"What do you mean by 'kind of'?"
"Well… I think he loves me now, but I'm not sure…"
"Why's that?"
"He doesn't remember too much about me from before his coma…"
"Oh… So how come you think he loves you then?"
"He just gave me a nickname recently."
"Really? That's cool."
"He never had a nickname for me before… It wouldn't go along with his personality…"
"Well his personality's changed now, right? So what's his nickname for you?"
"Aki-sama…"
"Aki-sama?... Hmm… I like it. It suits you."
"Right…"
"What's your nickname for him?"
"Lighty-kun… I only call him that sometimes though. After all, it does sound pretty gay."
"Well you are gay."
"Nah, really?"
"Jeez, you don't have to be like that… Is there anything else that suggests that he may finally be returning your feelings?"
"He's kind of possessive now…"
"Possessive? Is that a good thing?"
"I don't know… What I do know is that he only really becomes possessive when L's around… He seems to think that L's some kind of evil zombie hobo that wants to eat my brain or something…"
"That's… really weird."
"Yeah… He's never said that directly, of course, but he's certainly implied it."
"Well I guess that makes sense. You said that before he wanted to defeat and kill L, right? Most likely his animosity has remained but has transformed into something he can understand now that he doesn't have any memory of the Death Note or of having been Kira."
"Haha. You know, for someone who appears to only have half a brain, you're actually pretty smart… Oh, but please don't talk about such things on the phone. L or someone could be listening in to our conversation."
"Oh, right. Sorry."
"It's okay… Anyway, I think you're probably right about that. It does make the most sense for his anger-hatred-whatever to remain though for it to come out differently."
"Uh-huh… Oh, is there anything else that tells you that he might love you now?"
"Um… If I hug him, he actually hugs back… Before he'd be likely to hit me or freeze up…"
"Aw! That's so cute! You know, I'd really like to meet him sometime."
"Yeah, I know… It's still gonna be awhile before that can happen though. It's just that I don't want L to start suspecting you of doing anything… That would be really bad. Especially since we can't just get rid of him now if he finds out too much…"
"Oh, okay… Why'd you write his name down in the notebook anyway?"
"So I can't get rid of him just because… Are you positive that writing a person's name in the notebook like that prevents them from being killed by any Death Note?"
"Yup. I double checked by testing it on about 20 minor criminals."
"Okay, good."
"Hey, now that he's no longer using the notebook, are you gonna continue to have it appear that you both are still using it? I mean, it was a pain when you had me playing two roles at the same time."
"You don't have to worry about that, Misa. In fact, you probably won't have to play any extra roles for me anymore. Now that everything's settled, I will play both roles, and then eventually only one role. You should just enjoy life right now and spend some time with your boyfriend."
"Okay!... Oh, but how do you plan on turning it into one role?"
"First I'm going to play both roles for a little while longer, then I'll take a really long break from both roles randomly one day, and then when I start using the notebook again, I'll only play my role. I'll make it appear that perhaps Kira's had a change of heart or that one Kira has died or something."
"Ah, okay… You know, maybe you should find a way to spend more time with your friend and less time doing you-know-what."
"My-oh-my. Is the little Kira-worshiping model suggesting that Kira should go into retirement?"
"Well, kind of… I just want you to be happy, Akira."
"Thanks, but you do realize that if I were to retire from using the notebook that Ryuk would kill me, right?"
"Oh…"
"Yeah, see? That's the only reason why I really keep using it anymore. I mean, I would love to change the world, but that can be done by other means. I would just need to go into politics and go help the unfortunate and whatnot."
"That's true… If only Ryuk was more like Rem…"
"Yes, that would be nice. Rem has no intention of killing you, whereas Ryuk will kill me when he becomes too bored."
"But Akira, how could Ryuk get bored being around you? I mean, you're a psychic gay guy, your family's really weird, the guy you're in love with has amnesia and psychological issues, you're friends with a model that owns a Death Note, and you're friends with the best detective in the world… I think you're pretty interesting."
"Now that you say it like that… You've got a point there. Just my family alone should be entertaining enough for him… My mom messed with the supernatural when she was younger, but now she's an author and a yaoi fangirl… She's always been a major otaku though, even when she lived in America… It's one of the reasons why she married my dad: because he's Japanese… Oh, and she can't write in Japanese well since it's her second language… My dad's a psychiatrist that has Light as his patient, and he's completely cool with the weirdness of my family… Oh, and he has a tendency to antagonize his patients… My older brother, Takeshi, is dating you and is the only relatively normal family member I have… though you and I both know he's a bit of a pervert… My older brother, Tomah, is a cross-dresser who wants to become a rock star… He's straight somehow though… My older sister, Karman, is secretly a big-time criminal and a detective at the same time somehow… and she pretends to be a lesbian a lot of the time, even though she's straight… Oh, and she pretends that she's jealous of Takeshi and supposedly wants to 'convert you'…"
"That's just creepy."
"I know. She's probably the strangest of my siblings… Anyway, then there's also my little sister, Salem, who's a mad scientist whose dream is to have her own harem someday… Then there's also my cousin, Naomi, who used to be an FBI agent... Oh, and then there's also my cousin, Vera, who's dating my ex-boyfriend… Oh, and she's also one of those people that thinks everything is just a figment of her imagination. Can't say I blame her. After all, she's gorgeous, rich, popular, healthy… She basically has the most cushy, wonderful life anyone could ever have…"
"Are you serious? She's probably the most insane person in your family! Seriously? What, does she think that all of the horrible stuff in the world doesn't happen or something?"
"No. Actually she believes all of the horrible stuff is a figment of her imagination… I told her that if that's the case that she's a b*tch, but she doesn't really care what I think about her. After all, she thinks that I'm a figment of her imagination as well…"
"She's insane."
"I know. That's why I had no problem with my lying loser-of-a-boyfriend being interested in her. That's why I let him be with her."
"Oh, so it wasn't out of kindness?"
"Nope. It was my way of getting revenge."
"That's kind of evil, Akira."
"I know, but that's how it is. I let my liar of a boyfriend end up with my insane cousin… Heh. Even perfect people are imperfect."
"Well obviously your cousin's not perfect if she's completely crazy."
"Yeah, but it's funny that people think she's perfect though. She's good at deceiving people."
"Why would she deceive people if she thinks none of them are real?"
"She does it subconsciously."
"Oh… Yeah, she's completely insane. I don't want you to ever let her anywhere near me. If you do, I'll have no choice but to write her name in the Death Note… You didn't put her name in the Death Note yet, right?"
"No. She's the one family member of mine whose name I didn't write in the notebook... She is insane after all."
"Good. Don't have her come near me or else I'll write her name in the notebook."
"Got it."
"So is there anything else about your family that's weird?"
"I think that about sums it up… Ryuk really should be highly entertained already… I really might stop using the notebook after all…"
"Really?"
"Well… Probably not, but maybe… Anyway, I've gotta go. I have to finish translating my mom's book today so she can give it to her editor with the Japanese looking somewhat normal."
"Okay! Bye-bye!"
Author's Note:
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