Nita
I felt like I had no one. Dad had stay in his room since last night even shouting at grandma when she told him to come downstairs for dinner. I'd never heard him talk to her that way and it shocked me when she didn't retaliate instead returned to the kitchen table silent. I'd never seen her give up and not get the upper hand either. Something was off; I was going to find out what it was and get mum home. Dad and grandma refused to let me see her. They wouldn't even let me mention her name. Why had they suddenly disowned her? There was something I was missing, but what?
I rolled over looking at the glowing red numbers on my alarm clock, 5:48. Nearly time to get up for school. My alarm would go off at 6:10 and normally I would hit snooze as many times as possible not wanting to wake but today that wasn't going to be a problem, I was wide awake. I sat up knowing that sleep wouldn't come to me in the next twenty minuets. I looked around my room it was still dark only vaguely lit by a street lamp through my bedroom curtains. I always hated the winter time when I had to wake up when it was dark but compared to recent weeks I felt like I'd been complaining about nothing.
I threw back the duvet might as well start the day now. I stepped along the landing trying to find all the spots that didn't creak when you walked on them hopping to make it to the bathroom with out waking anyone. I closed the bathroom door silently and breathed a sigh of relief. Why was I so nervous about making noise in my own house? I knew the answer. It was because of her. I pulled the cord bringing the bathroom light to life and squinted through the bright light to look at my reflection in the mirror. My cheek was a dull purple colour but it was still visibly a bruise. Now I would have to do what my mum did, use make-up to cover it up. Part of me didn't want to just to say to hell with it all and if people asked be scarily honest with them. But now I was in my mum's position I knew how she felt. I didn't want people to know that I let it happen to me either. So grudgingly I pulled her make-up bag out of the cupboard and started rifling through it to find what I needed.
Jay
I yawned as I entered the ED as my restless night catching up with me. I headed straight for the staffroom craving my second coffee of the morning. As I opened the door I found Emily and Zoe curled up on the sofa together fast asleep. I smiled at them as I crept to my locker wanting to get to my phone out to get a picture before they woke. I grinned as I got the picture with out either of them stirring. One day this picture would be very useful!
"Jay," I didn't need to turn to know it was Tess collaring me for being late.
"I'm just coming," I say pulling on the rest of my scrubs and taking one last look at them peacefully sleeping, at least they were managing to get some sleep.
The first person I bumped into when leaving the staffroom was Adam, talk about unfortunate. Not that I didn't like Adam or anything, far from it but ever since Kirsty first came in and her abuse came to light he'd been a nightmare to be around. He was always lost in thought, with a serious expression on his face that nobody, not even Lenny, Big Mac, Noel and I could budge. I hated to see him so unhappy he obviously cared a lot for Kirsty, more than I first realised but there comes a point where you try to avoid him because you don't have a clue what to say to him because everything you do say will end in the same sad and disappointed face which makes you feel like you've fail him in someway.
"Morning," I said ducking my head as we passed each other, me coming out of the staffroom him going in. He looks up at me for a second as if seeing me for the first time and I could see raw emotion in his eyes surrounded by heavy black bags indicating that he hadn't sleep probably, if at all in the last couple of days.
"Is it?" he questioned sounding lost but didn't wait for a reply just carried on into the staffroom flicking the switch on the kettle starting to made a cup of coffee. I had no more time to think about him as Tess called over to me telling me that we had incoming in less than a minuet and she need me in rhesus.
Kirsty
I felt like I'd just back tracked a couple of weeks as I woke to the sounds of steady, rhythmic bleeping and the usual hustle and bustle of the ward. But strangely I felt more at home here than at my actual home. I blinked my eyes opened quickly trying to get a quick glance of what was going on around me only to be met with bright lights forcing them shut again. How had I got here? What had happened? My memories were blurry; I remembered flashes of what Warren had done to me. Why was he so violent? I forced my self to concentrate on remembering. I remembered the beginning of my day, we were going to run. Did he catch us? Was Nita ok? Fear struck me and I tried to sit up pulling at the oxygen mask trying to remove it from my face. How far had he gone?
"Kirsty calm down, you're at Holby. You're going to be ok." Tess's normally calm voice sounding stressed.
"Nita, is she ok?" My voice was raw and scratchy. Tess looked down at me for a couple of seconds surprised that I was suddenly talking after weeks for silence.
"Yer, she fine," I relaxed back onto the bed relieved that no harm had come to my daughter, "she and Warren went home last night." I tensed at Warren's name earning me a curious look from Tess. "I'm sure they will be in to see you soon." She didn't sound convinced though.
"What happened?" I asked remembering that I still couldn't remember why I was here.
"Don't you remember?" she asked in a voice I'd heard her use before to patients who had done bad things. I shook my head thinking back through everything I could remember. What had I done?
Tess breathed in deeply before sighing. She took my hand looking down at it trying to avoid my question but really just biding herself time.
"Tess, why am I here?" she looked up at me sadness filling her eyes. Did she know about Warren? I panicked when she still didn't answer me.
"Warren found you," I released a breath I didn't realise I was holding, at least she didn't know the truth I just had to go along with whatever he had said. "He came home and you were in the bathroom," she paused briefly looking away from my questioning look. "You, you had taken his medication; a lot of it."
I stared up at her trying to take in what she had just said.
"Wh – no, no I wouldn't do that; ever, what about Nita? No you're wrong, no; I didn't, I can't have." My voice trailed off. Tears stung in my eyes.
I tore my hand out of Tess's unwilling to except what she had just told me.
"Kirsty," she tried to touch me and give me comfort but I shrunk away from her touch. It was my natural reaction and it scared me that I'd shown it to her.
"I want to be by my self," I whispered not wanting an angry reaction, "please."
"Call me if you need anything." I nodded and she turned and left. As soon as the door closed I rolled over with my back to the door and let out the tears I'd managed to hold in. I knew I wouldn't do that but I was questioning myself, Warren wouldn't have done this to me. I truly believed that Warren wouldn't have done this but I couldn't remember, what other explanation was there? There was one but I still couldn't bring myself to believe that I would do that. Even if I thought of doing it what about Nita I would never leave her?
I wouldn't have done this. I was going to tell everyone. I knew Nita wouldn't like it but felt like I had to be free of this whole thing; it had gone on too long. As much as I really didn't want people to know what I had been going through for the past thirteen years I didn't want to spend the next thirteen years like this even more than the shame of them knowing. I just needed to remember, I was so confused and every time I tried to remember what had happened I got more and more frustrated. Why couldn't I remember?
Huge thank you to Dudeybob and Sararah for their wonderful ideas, only problem is that I can't decide between them! I'll probably try and put them both together, not really sure how yet though. Thanks for reading :D xx