Lord Drake Misadventures 37
By: Vyce Dryke, 2009

And now for another deliciously demented Misadventures. Sound off. xD

Lord Drake: BLOOD FOR TH-Ooo. Khorne Flakes.
Tlanextic: *facepalms* Oh no. not again.
Dragonspit: I'm only really around for looks.
Vyce: It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood...
Rhuemwight: AUUUGH MY SPLEEN!
Lord Corrack: Hellooooo Nurse!

Lord Drake: There's.. Something a bit.. strange about Vyce today.
Tlanextic: He's an undivided Chaos Dragon that changes Chaos God allegiances at will. So of course he's going to be a bit strange.
Lord Drake: I mean more than usual. He's all girly and bubbly like a school girl and in his Anthro form.

Tlanextic ponders this, and then stares.

Tlanextic: Oh no.. Oh no.. I think I know what happened.
Lord Drake: Hm? What?
Tlanextic: He must have changed patrons again.
Lord Drake: My god!
Tlanextic: Where is he?
Lord Drake: In his lair. Come on!

The two run for it.

As they approach they hear fits of giggles, and various Ooohs and Ahs. They walk in to see Vyce, who is currently on hind legs, his anthro self, and looking quite a bit different.

For one, the dragonfur is completely gone and his black scales are shining a a bit, the visible parts of his belly a streak of white. Presumably the same up his chest and chin, and downwards int he other direction. He wore an interesting outfit, all black and various sections made of fishnet and straps. He had white hair over his scaled head, and his eyes were the usual red.

Of course the most noticeable difference was his chest. or well.. Her chest.

Tlanextic: What's this? He's a she?
Lord Drake: He wasn't like this a minute ago.

Vyce sees the two of them and giggles, giving them both a wink.

Vyce: I'm a bit of a gendershift... Male? Female? Herm? Depends on my mood dearies.
Lord Drake: Dearies?
Tlanextic: I can only assume Slaanesh has caught your eye.
Vyce: Just a little...

Vyce hmms and looks herself over, giving her tail a flick.

Vyce: Although I can say I like the new look. A lot more mature, don't you think?

Lord Drake hmms and Tlanextic simply palmfaces.

Vyce: Slaanesh seems to be a good choice at the moment. I'm in a female mood. So it's not all that surprising~ *giggle*
Tlanextic: So you've pretty much turned into a furry?
???: A furry!?
???2: He said a furry!
Lord Drake: Jesus Christ on a Pogo Stick!

Lord Drake jumps as an Eldar ranger in yellow armor melds from the shadows, a Warp Spider appears from nowhere, as does a howling banshee. It's hard to tell on the last one, a Warlock? A Guardian? Confused?

Tlanextic: Who the hell are you guys?
Warp Spider: Crew! Sound off!
Ranger: Randy the Ranger here. Only you can prevent forest fires!
Banshee: Bonnie reporting. I'm sooo happy to be here today~!
Guardian?: Gary here.. Uhm. I'm still not sure what I am. Am I a guardian a warlock? Or.. just confused.
Warp Spider: And I'm Joe the Warp Spider. I've caught you in my web. Ha haaah!
Eldar: Together we're.. The Furry Extermination squad!

Tlanextic palmfaces for the second time in this episode. We need a counter going and set it up at the end.

Lord Drake: Are you.. seriosuly?
Joe: Well. No. Not really. We're whatever we want to be when it's convenient.
Vyce: Why hello there Bonnie~
Bonnie: Mercy! The tempature just went up.
Randy: Tempature? Going up? THERE"S A FIRE BOYS!
Joe: Randy... Calm the hell down. There is NO fire here.
Gary: But how do you know?
Joe: Gary. Your always confused.
Gary: Am not!
Joe: You can't even pick a career path. Nobody really knows what the hell you are.

Bonnie shrieks as her back is twisted and broken. Vyce is smiling mischievously, a bit of a bloodlust formed.

Vyce: Oooh.. That was delicious..

There is a sickening crunch as the Eldar's soulstone is ripped out, and before anybody could even react, it was cracked with soul devoured, and Vyce looking really pleased with herself.

Vyce: I must.. Have more.

The Chaos Dragon cackles, displaying her fangs.

Joe: She got Bonnie! Nooo! Shoot it shoot it!
Bonnie: Wait! Wait. I'm not dead yet.

Everybody blinks and stares.

Vyce: What? But I devoured your soulstone..
Bonnie: It's... only a flesh wound. I've had worse.

Vyce growls.

Vyce: Fleshwound this...

With a quick flash, Bonnie burns off into nothing.

Bonnie: I'm feeling better.
Vyce: How the? What the? I'm confused.
Tlanextic: I'd say this doesn't make sense. but...
Lord Drake: Nothing EVER makes sense around here.!

Gary pokes Vyce with a knife. The dragon blinks, notes the wound, and bites her lower lip

Vyce: Oh my.... that was *giggle* Painful!
Lord Drake: She's gone insane!
Tlanextic: She's worse than being Tzeentch.
Vyce: I should return the favor yes?

The Slaaneshi Female smiles wickedly, twisting the wrist of the... whatever the Eldar is, and getting the knife jammed in his thigh.

Gary: No! I have so much to live for! I haven't even picked an aspect!
Joe: Gary! Nooo...

Vyce smirks, and tilts her head.. grabs the knife and it hums with power. And Gary turns into... A snail!?

Gary: Mrow?
Joe: Gary. Snails don't meow.
Gary: Moo?
Joe: No. No. That's not even close.
Gary: Oink oink?
Joe: Gary! Be serious!
Gary: Mrow.
Joe: That's not serious.
Gary: Mrow D:
Joe: Gary. This is NOT Spongebob Squarepants.
Gary: Mrow :/

The female shrugs, gives her tail a flick, and knocks over Randy.

Randy: FIRE! FIRE!
Vyce: Fire? I see no fire mortal. Well.. Unless it's that fire.

She cackles, and Bonnie gets back up without any horrible wounds, holding a soulstone for some weird reason. Randy is on fire, screaming about fire, and Joe sighs and puts it out.

Joe: Oi. That's it. We're gone. Screw you crazy people.

The Eldar vanish into thing air.

Vyce: No! I was just getting started. The fools! THE COWARDS.

She growls and huffs and puffs, but doesn't see a house to blow down. She sighs and sinks down onto her nest in her lair.

Lord Drake: Well that was.. interesting...
Tlanextic: And a bit scary... The new Vyce is very.. dangerous.
Vyce: I'm a good girl. I promise.

Vyce smiles innocently, Tlanextic shiver and Lord Drake blinks.

Lord Drake: Wait until Corrack hears of this!

The smile fades.

Vyce: If he tries it I'll snap his neck.

Tlanextic shivers again.

Lord Drake: Right then.
Tlanextic: Now would be a good time to leave.

Vyce shrugs, and watches the two leave. Vyce dims the lights and turns up some loud techno for whatever reason. Probably 'cause of Slaanesh, and then lays back and relaxes, a smirk on her face.