Dean stopped singing as he heard the floorboards outside the bathroom creak and light footsteps make their way to the bathroom. He cautiously leaned out and grabbed the baseball bat from behind the toilet. He brought the bat close to his chest and got back behind the curtain of the shower, standing ready to swing. He took a deep breath and strengthened his grip on the bad as he heard the door creak open to the shower. The shower curtain was yanked open and Dean swung, a loud scream echoing the air.
"What the hell, Dean?!" Cas cried, just barely ducking out of the way of the bat.
"Oh. It's just you." Dean sighed.
"Who else would it be?" Cas retorted. "The gingerbread man?"
"Maybe. The boys come from all around to see me naked." Dean smirked.
"You can set down the bat now." Cas stated.
"Oh, yeah." Dean laughed, tossing the bat outside of the shower onto the rug. "So what'd you want?"
"Well I was going to display affection and love for you through a romantic gesture, but I guess you'd prefer bashing my brains in." Cas chuckled, casting a quick glance at the black, metal bat on the floor.
"Well, it's never too late for a 'display of affection and love for me through a romantic gesture'." Dean growled
"Okay." Cas smiled, stepping a leg into the shower.
"You're getting in the shower?" Dean asked.
"No, Dean. I walk around naked because I have nothing better to do." Cas snorted.
"I wouldn't hate that." Dean mused.
"Shut up." Cas mumbled, kissing the side of Dean's mouth and placing his hands at Dean's hair.
After a moment, Cas removed his hands and Dean heard a *schloop* sound.
"Cas, did you fart?" Dean burst out laughing.
"No, that was the shampoo bottle." Cas answered, holding out the blue bottle.
"Shampoo? What for?" Dean chuckled.
"I'm washing your hair." Cas stated.
"That's your romantic gesture?" Dean raised an eyebrow. "You gonna wash anything else?"
"If you want." Cas growled into Dean's ear.
"Really? Anything?" Dean smiled.
"Oh yes, Dean. Anything." Cas whispered.
"Awesome." Dean grinned. "Cos I have this one spot on my back which I just can't reach really well. Finally someone can wash that for me."
"Asshole." Cas muttered, scrubbing the shampoo into Dean's hair.
"You wish." Dean retorted.
"Shut up." Cas smiled, kissing the side of Dean's neck.
"Gladly." Dean smirked, turning his head and giving Cas a quick kiss.
"I love you." Cas sighed, letting his soapy hands fall from Dean's head to his stomach and resting his head on Dean's shoulder.
"I love you too, Cas, but you need to hurry up with my hair because I have soap falling into my eyes and this hurts like a bitch." Dean snorted.
"Oh, sorry." Cas chuckled, shifting his hands back up to Dean's head.
Dean ran a hand through his berry-scented hair as he focused on the papers lying on the table in front of him. Cas just had to grab the scented shampoo, didn't he? Dean tapped his pen against the edge of the table, thinking on the papers.
"What are you doing?" Cas asked, entering the room.
"Work." Dean sighed.
"You don't look like you're under a car." Cas stated.
"Paperwork." Dean replied.
"Why aren't you talking to me?" Cas demanded.
Dean held the papers in the air. "Work, Cas."
"It's more than that. I can tell." Cas grumbled.
"It's really not, Cas." Dean smiled. "I'm working."
"So? You can work anytime. Talk to me." Cas ordered.
"I can also talk to you anytime. I have a deadline for these forms." Dean chuckled, writing something down on one of the sheets.
"I don't care." Cas said.
"Self-indulged prick..." Dean muttered.
"I heard that." Cas snapped.
"I don't care." Dean smirked, mimicking Cas's tone.
"Assbutt." Cas huffed. "I want you to talk to me."
"Jesus, Cas!" Dean groaned, rolling his head back. "You're always telling me to shut up. Why is it the one time I'm doing something important you actually want to talk to me?"
"Cos I'm a self-indulged prick?" Cas shrugged.
"Amen." Dean snorted, turning back to the papers on the table, before violently putting his pen down and turning to Cas. "You have five minutes. What do you want?"
"Dunno." Cas answered.
"You don't know?" Dean laughed. "You want me to talk to you, but you don't know what you want to talk about. Typical you."
"I never said I wanted to talk. I said I wanted you to talk." Cas countered.
"What do you want me to say?" Dean sighed while laughing.
Cas shrugged.
"My name is Dean Winchester. I'm 23 years old. I live with my boyfriend of...I don't even know time periods long. We share a room in his luxurious mansion. He is a major pain in the ass and loves to annoy me when I'm trying to do something. Secretly, I'm hoping he'll shut up and go away so I can fill out these evaluation forms." Dean smiled smugly.
Cas smiled sincerely back at him.
"That was an insult, Cas." Dean whispered. "Just in case you didn't notice."
"I noticed." Cas nodded. "I just love the sound of your voice."
"Fucking weirdo." Dean retorted.
"Yeah, that's me." Cas grinned. "A fucking weirdo."
"Damn straight." Dean snorted.
"Keep talking." Cas sighed.
"No." Dean chuckled. "I'm through. I have to work on this pile of horse shit."
"I don't see any horse manure anywhere." Cas mused, causing Dean to laugh.
"I meant these stupid forms, but I would rather be shoveling horse shit than this." Dean muttered.
"I doubt that, Dean." Cas stated.
Dean let out a long breath, draping his arms off to the side of his chair. "You try doing all this."
"If you want me to." Cas said.
"Thanks, but no." Dean laughed. "Got to do this on my own, Cas. Besides, you don't work at the shop. You have no clue what all this is."
"No, I guess I don't." Cas shrugged, resting his arms on the back of Dean's chair.
"Can you go away now?" Dean asked. "Work to do."
"Why would I want to do that?" Cas smirked.
"Because so help me, I will fuck you up if you don't. I'd like to get to bed at a reasonable time, thank you very much. And that's not happening if I have to keep working on this, with you bothering me." Dean replied.
"You're no fun." Cas pouted.
"No, I'm not. That's what happens when you grow up and have responsibilities, Cas. Payback." Dean growled.
"Paying the bills is actually important, Dean." Cas stated.
"And my job isn't? I kind of need to make a living, Cas." Dean chuckled.
"You're in a committed relationship with a multi-billionaire, Dean. I don't think you're in need of any monetary assistance." Cas smiled, resting his chin on top of Dean's head.
Dean tilted his head back so he was looking up at Cas. "No, but I need money of my own don't I?"
"You can all my money. It's yours, too." Cas responded.
"Can I just have a job without getting the third degree?" Dean snorted.
"Not with me around." Cas answered.
"Trust me, I know. Nosy prick." Dean laughed.
"You love it." Cas whispered, nibbling on the side of Dean's neck.
"Yeah. I suppose I do." Dean smiled.
After a moment, Cas jerked Dean's chair out from the table, a large screech echoing the house.
"Cas, what the hell ar-" Dean started, but was cut off by Cas straddling his lap and crashing their lips together.
"Oh okay." Dean mumbled. "Still. What are you doing?"
Cas pulled away, confused. "Foreplay."
"Why, exactly?" Dean replied, with a light laugh.
"I wish to engage in intercourse." Cas stated.
"In the kitchen?" Dean snorted.
"Sure." Cas shrugged.
"Cas we eat in here." Dean chuckled. "Besides. I told you a million times that I have work to do."
"So?" Cas growled.
"So..." Dean sighed. "I can not 'engage in intercourse' when I have work to do."
"Aw." Cas frowned.
"You'll get over it." Dean smiled, giving him a light pat on the shoulder. "Besides, I can't name one time you weren't DTF."
"DTF?" Cas asked.
"JFC, learn some terms, Cas." Dean laughed. "DTF. Down to fuck."
"Oh." Cas breathed. "And what's JFC? Is that a KFC sister chain?"
"No. That's Jesus Fucking Christ." Dean chuckled. "But see Cas, this is why I won't let you visit me at work. The second I try to get something done, you'd start dry humping my side."
"That's only partially true." Cas stated.
"What part of it isn't?" Dean retorted.
"It wouldn't be dry humping. I would be all over your side."
"I don't want to envision that." Dean laughed. "I'd get fired for sure, and thanks to smartphones, you'd be a porn star in no time. And that's not allowed."
"Fine." Cas sighed. "I'd just have to resort to frottage then."
"See. My point exactly. You're not allowed at my work. Not with a mind like that, that's for sure." Dean smiled.
Cas glared at Dean. "Asshole. I'm going to break in and harass you all day sometime."
"You do that and I will staple your nuts to my desk." Dean growled.
"That would definitely not in your best interest or mine." Cas stated. "Besides. We both know you have some sliver of a heart left in there and could never get it up to hurt me."
"Don't test me." Dean laughed. "Playing with fire gets you burned Cas, and you're about to become deep fried extra crispy."
"I don't like you." Cas stated.
"I don't like you either." Dean smirked.
"Fine." Cas responded.
"Fine." Dean countered. "So does this mean that if I tell you to piss off, you'll leave me alone and I can do my work and go to bed?"
"Go to bed?" Cas scoffed. "It's only 9!"
"I woke up at 5 AM this morning, Cas." Dean yawned.
"No you didn't." Cas argued.
"Yeah, Cas." Dean laughed. "I did."
"When I woke up, you were asleep." Cas stated.
"I woke up, went to work, came home to get another hour in before I had to go back." Dean explained.
"Well if you got another hour's sleep, then I don't know why you're tired. Drink some coffee or something."
"Cas, just go away." Dean rolled his eyes. "I have to finish these."
"No. I'm not moving." Cas protested.
"Oh yes you are." Dean replied, bring one of his legs upwards, tossing Cas off to the side onto the floor.
"Ow." Cas whimpered.
"You deserved it." Dean snorted, turning his chair back into the table and picking up his pen again.
"Only a little." Cas muttered.
"A lot." Dean coughed.
"Screw you." Cas laughed.
"Not tonight, big boy." Dean smirked as Cas walked to the pantry to get something to eat.
"Praise the Lord!" Dean cried, tossing his pen violently on the table.
"Are you done?" Cas asked.
"Thank God. Yes I am." Dean answered. "You wanna go to bed?"
"Oh do I..." Cas hummed.
"Do you?" Dean chuckled.
Cas nodded vigorously.
"Okay, weirdo." Dean smiled, pushing the papers into a piled and rolling them into a tube.
Cas smiled widely back at him as he impatiently waited for Dean to get his things together.
As Dean began up the stairs, Cas buried his hand in Dean's back pocket and leaned his head against his shoulder.
"Aren't you the romantic?" Dean cooed, kissing the top of Cas's head. "Such a cutie."
"Shut up." Cas growled.
"As long as you don't talk, you're cute." Dean smirked.
"I'm always cute. In the manly way." Cas replied.
"And you're also always a little piece of shit." Dean retorted.
"It takes one to know one." Cas whispered.
"So true." Dean nodded. "So true."
Dean got into bed and pulled the lamp light off. Cas quickly followed and immediately began sucking on Dean's neck and running his hands down Dean's chest, causing him to moan quietly.
Cas let his hands wander further down Dean's torso and proceeded to slip his hand into Dean's boxers.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa what you doing there, grabby hands?" Dean snorted.
"Engaging in intercourse." Cas answered.
"No." Dean laughed. "I'm tired. I'm going to sleep."
"But you said we were going to bed." Cas said confused.
"Yeah. I did. We're in bed. And I'm going to sleep. I said nothing about sex." Dean chuckled. "So help me if you try to seduce me one more time, you will be sleeping on the floor tonight."
"You tricked me." Cas pouted.
"Did not." Dean smiled.
"I know you, Dean. You're just being a whiny bitch because you want someone to snuggle you at night time." Cas stated.
"Jesus said that lying is bad, Cas. Don't you have any morals?" Dean scoffed.
"You know I'm an atheist." Cas laughed. "And no. I don't have morals."
"Yeah. Obviously." Dean retorted. "Now shut up and go to sleep or get out so I can."
"You don't think I'm attractive anymore." Cas said sadly. "That's it, isn't it?"
"What?" Dean burst out laughing. "Boy, your English teacher must've loved you."
"It must be. You're avoiding the question." Cas muttered.
"Listen here, you asshat." Dean stated. "You will always be attractive to me. You are my muffincake and I would still love you no matter what you looked anyways."
"Muffincake?" Cas giggled.
"Pet names were never my forte." Dean smiled.
"Trust me, I know." Cas nodded.
"Anyways, just because I am too tired to 'engage in intercourse' does not mean that I don't find you attractive you little shit." Dean chuckled.
"That's all?" Cas asked. "You're just tired?"
"No, Cas." Dean rolled his eyes. "I've been faking the bags under my eyes."
Cas made a satisfied sighed in reply, laying his head back down on Dean's bare chest. Dean combed through Cas's hair before leaning in and whispering something.
"Now shut the fuck up or you're sleeping on the floor. Dean is tired." Dean growled.
A/N: SWEET JESUS ON A STICK THIS TOOK TOO LONG TO WRITE. I mean, I knew what I wanted to write, it's just I couldn't find the time. I mean, I'm completely obsessed with the game I'm playing and also obsessed with playing that game 2048 and also dealing with more life problems. #FUNTIMES. I hope everyone blazed it on 4/20. (jk. You'd probably get arrested if you were in some states) I spent my easter telling Mormons at my mom's church to go blaze it. They didn't understand. Apparently, I took some psych tests online and I score 12 out of 14 points positive for Borderline Personality Disorder and 72 out of 79 points positive for severe internet addiction. Whoops. My biological dad also got out of jail and came to visit...and then asked to see my fanfiction account. Ah shit. I hate showing real people my accounts. It's scary (probably due to the social anxiety disorder I also have (Should i trust the internet? (Probably not, but a medical professional actually verified the anxiety))) Next chapter should probably come tomorrow if I"m not a lazy ass about the whole thing (again).
- Spoilers for tonights ep below -
AHHHHH. I was playing one of my games and looked up and it was 8:06 and I'd missed the beginning of supernatural and I was running across the hall silently screaming, "FUCK FUCK FUCK!" praying to god my parents didn't hear me. And I got in there and pretty much almost murdered myself turning on the TV. So I had no clue what was going on, but luckily, I'd pirated the episode earlier and watched the first few minutes during commercials. I loved seeing Jodi back. She's just great. She's one of my fave fem characters on the show. But at the end, with Sam and Dean.
Sam: Dean...
Dean: Yeah I know. You wouldn't have done the same for me...
FUCK YOU TWO. GET IT TOGETHER.
Dean's definitely heading down a dark path with this mark of cain thing. Cas was not happy about that. At all. Idk how I feel about next week's episode, "bloodlines". I haven't seen too much buzz about it on my dash on Tumblr or anything, so I don't know how it's sitting with the rest of the fandom. I'm just impatiently waiting for the season to finish so I'm not left in suspense 6 days of the week for the next month. That's not healthy. My life is slowly getting demolished by my fandom. Slowly, but surely.