This chapter is shorter than I usually prefer but I couldn't fit everything in that I wanted. The next chapter will be a game changer.

It will be thousands before I'm done. Zuko's threat to kill beats like a drum in Katara's mind. Azula had made the Fire Nation bleed for Zuko. Zuko, it seems, would bleed the world for Azula. She replays the way he challenged Aang. Was it a challenge as Fire Lord to Avatar or was it a protective brother challenging his dead sister's lover? Anger has always been Zuko's go-to emotion. And Azula has always been the one to provoke Zuko the most. Even in death she has a hold on him, a connection that no one, not even Katara as his wife, can break.

For whatever reason, Azula guarded her secrets with only Zuko as confidant. Katara had been let in only by virtue of her healing abilities. Otherwise, she knows the siblings would have kept her in the dark. She can only imagine all the things that were kept between the two of them that may never come to light. But with Azula dead, she couldn't keep this particular secret any longer. She had to tell Aang the truth. He deserved to know about the child they lost.

Secrets come with prices though; Zuko barely speaks to her and Aang has left for the temple. Katara feels bereft and alone.

Over tea the next morning, Mai fixes her with one of her blank stares. "Of course Zuko is brooding. What did you think would happen?" Katara frowns at the noblewoman's harshness. Mai's face softens. "Azula and Zuko have always orbited around each other more than anyone realized. What happens when one of them falls? You should have seen Azula after Zuko was banished." Mai gives a faint smile. "She would never admit it."

Katara ponders this as her own cup of tea cools. "I don't think he believes she's really gone."

Mai nods sagely. "He's stubborn like that."

The words hold true and Katara knows it with each beat of her heart. The same drive Zuko had to overcome his deficiencies in Fire Bending and to sail the world to capture the Avatar causes him to hold onto this piece of a lost family, a lost sister.

When she slips into his office that evening, she finds him slumped in his chair. Eyes closed, breath gently moving in his chest. She takes the moment to just watch and take him in. The lines on his face show the weight this puts on him. The chain that is slowly choking the life out of him is heavier than ever. She wants to shake him awake, beg him to let this go, but she knows he won't. Zuko is relentless in his focus. Her eyes fall to Azula's urn which occupies the middle of the large desk. Even in death she takes the centerpoint of his life. Slowly Katara turns to leave.

"I shouldn't have let her go." The whispered words are too loud in the quiet of his offices.

Katara turns to meet the slit of gold peeking up at her. "Could you have stopped her?"

He smiles though it is not one of amusement or happiness. "I'm the Fire Lord."
It's a throwback to one of the many disagreements he and Azula would have about the Fire Nation, the crown, about each other.

Katara says none of this but instead reaches out her hand, waving her fingers at him. "The baby's tired but we can't sleep without you."

The mention of their son draws a rarely seen smile to his face but he makes no move to stand.

"I shouldn't have let her go. I knew she wasn't up to it." They rarely speak about the illness that laid Azula so low. Zuko has been wracked with guilt that he couldn't even protect her in their own home. Katara knows what he is saying. If he couldn't protect her here then why send her out, into the thick of it, far beyond the protection of home. "And now she's dead."

The last word leaves his voice in a hiss. It is a familiar hiss. Azula has thrown it at her a few times but she knows just where it all started. The light in his eyes and the edge in his voice are eerie reminders of the specter that truly haunts them both. Ozai. Something about her husband emulating his father chills her blood.

Katara swallows against the alien sense of fear in her chest. "No one could have stopped her, Zuko. Azula would always do what she wanted."

Zuko blinks at this and the fire banks in his eyes. "I should have."

The words are cold but the room is hot. Katara resists pointing out that no one, not the Fire Lord nor the Avatar could pin Azula down. They were all just wishing and hoping for something that would never be.

"I'm going to bed. Are you coming?" The day is wearing on her and all Katara wants to do now is close her eyes.

Zuko isn't ready to give up Azula's ghost and he may never be. The temperature of the room falls and he gives a small nod. Soon his warm fingers are wrapping around hers and he leads her from the room.

The walk to their chambers is quiet. Since Azula's death, the Fire Lord's temper has been foul and he is no longer plagued with minor matters. Once inside they silently strip off the robes of their stations. The silk sheets are cool to her skin but Zuko's hands are hot as they pull her against him molding her body to his. Her eyes are already fluttering closed as the exhaustion washes over her.

Zuko's quiet voice breaks the peace of the moment. "I can't let her go, Katara."

Katara's eyes snap open at the realization that while Azula is dead that she will never be gone.

Ooooo

Ozai stands looking up at the moon when Iroh draws near.

"The Northern Water Tribe loses a princess and gets a moon. The Fire Nation loses a princess and what is our compensation?" The former king muses.

"Losing a child is difficult." Iroh says neutrally. He knows his brother's moods are as mercurial and changeable as the tides themselves.

Ozai turns an appraising eye to him. "Yes, it is. At least between us we still have Zuko, though, I imagine, he considers you more his father than he ever considered me."

Iroh wisely says nothing about the Fire Lord's paternal feelings."It still does not lessen the pain."

"Indeed." He pauses sizing up the shorter man. "What brings you here tonight, brother? Come to offer your condolences after how long? A month is it?"

Iroh has been avoiding this conversation. Speaking with Ozai never ends well for anyone. "I thought we should speak."

Ozai scoffs. "What is there to discuss: how you were too weak to take Ba Sing Se, claim the throne, or are you here on an errand from the Fire lord? He likes to use my family to entice secrets out of me."

Iroh feels a flush of guilt at this insinuation of Zuko's motives when it was Iroh himself who first suggested to Azula that she speak to Ozai to gain information about Ursa. It seems like a lifetime ago.

"It's about Zuko." He admits.

Ozai turns away with a scowl. Voice gaining volume."You sound like Azula. It was always about Zuko! Zuko was all that mattered. Zuko is the reason she's gone!" He turns back, eyes blazing bright in the night.

Iroh rises to Zuko's defense. "Zuko did not cause Azula's death. You cannot blame him for an unfortunate accident."

Ozai laughs, a cold and bitter sound. "It was no accident. There was never an accident. But Zuko is the reason my daughter is gone. Open your eyes and see Zuko for the man he is, for the Fire Lord he has become." Confused Iroh frowns. Ozai's eyes light up with amusement. "You haven't a clue, do you?" He laughs, deep and rich, anger gone and mania taking over. "I must say, the boy makes me proud." Ozai sobers, but still wears a smug smirk. "Go and speak to our esteemed ruler. See for yourself just what is really going on."

Ooooo

Time has no meaning at the Southern Air Temple. It has remained virtually unchanged since the day Aang left over a century ago. The static feel is a refreshing change from the hustle of the world.

Appa ambles off to graze and Momo flits off to who knows where. Aang wearily makes his way deep into the stone structure towards the rooms he has claimed. Once inside he discards his bag and staff. He can't resist the siren song of his bed and closes his eyes even as he crawls onto the soft blanket. Stretching out onto the large mattress he feels the tension ebbing away. Cold metal and the crinkle of paper greets his fingers. Lifting his head he eyes the flamed trident, confused until the implication hits him and then he is instantly awake.

Azula.

He sits up looking around the room before he remembers that Azula isn't here. She won't be here. Azula is gone. Looking back at the metal in his hand he blinks back tears. Azula must have stopped here on her way to the Earth Kingdom, on the way to her death.

Glancing around his eyes fall on the letter. Picking it up, he stares at it. He wants to read it. He wants to not read it. These are the last words Azula has for him. Aang's not sure he's ready for that.

Closing his eyes he seeks the calm center. Before Azula's fall, he had decided it was important to let go of attachments. He couldn't let her have that sort of power over him. He couldn't let anyone have that sort of power over his emotions. He reminds himself that death doesn't really change that.

Breathing deep he opens the letter and reads.

Ooooo

Roku nods in greeting as Aang approaches. Gray eyes dart back and forth, searching; seeking. When he fails to find what he wants, he meets the eyes of his former self.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Aang snaps.

Roku looks contrite. "It was not my place to tell you."

"To tell yourself?"

Roku smiles sadly. "I had hoped my grandson would tell you."

"Zuko wouldn't give up Azula's secrets. Katara told me." Aang tries to keep the bitterness from his words. The Fire Lady revealed the royal family secret after interrupting a rapidly evolving argument between Zuko and Aang. He has often wondered just how far it would have gone, if it would have come to blows.

Roku sighs, drawing Aang's attention back to the matter at hand. "You found Azula's letter." He surmises.

Aang holds the sad gaze of the other. "Yes."

"I am glad she left that." Roku replies calmly.

Aang is almost afraid to ask but he does anyway. "Where is she?"

The Fire Bender regards him with solemn eyes as if weighing his words. "I've not seen her but the Spirit World is vast."

Roku leaves unsaid the myriad of unpleasant possibilities that could befall someone with a past like Azula's.

"I could not tell you what was not mine to tell. Azula had many secrets. One you have already met albeit in an informal capacity." Roku allows as he turns towards a small house on a hill. "Would you like to see your son, Avatar Aang?"

At the doorway to the house Ta Min emerges holding the golden eyed child in her arms. Yes, Azula went to great lengths to conceal this from him. Zuko and Katara were complicit in her lies. Her letter claimed she wished to spare him the pain of loss but for some unknown reason she sought to confess all in a letter. Their child, her regrets, and, oh the murders; all of it was there including the true extent of just what the Fire Nation was up to. Perhaps she knew she was going to her death. Perhaps she wanted some degree of forgiveness. It's too fresh, too new. Detachment is truly the path for him but first, he looks at the gleaming golden eyes of his child. Aang nods slowly before following Roku's lead.

Ooooo

When the shimmer fades and Aang returns to himself, he feels a moment of disorientation.

"Bout time you snapped out of it, Twinkles." Toph is sprawled on the ground, blank eyes pointed towards the clear blue sky.

"How long have you been here?" His voice is rough from days of disuse.

Toph sits up, facing him. "Long enough to know you have been mucking around in the Spirit World for too long." Aang frowns at her assessment. "You're losing weight."

"Not been hungry." He offers as explanation.

Toph arches a brow at him. "Don't do that." Her voice softens, "I heard about Azula."

He looks away. "Katara?"

"Yeah, she's worried about you but Zuko's being an ass so she can't come check on you herself."

"Tell her I'm fine."

"Yeah, let me just jot a quick message."

"Sorry."

"Yeah, well, you need to eat." She tosses a sack at him. "Suki hit the markets for ya." Aang opens the sack. Suki went to quite a bit of trouble. He makes a mental note to send his thanks. "Food, then I'm kicking your ass with some sparring."

Her brashness never fails to amuse him. With Toph he never has to talk about the things he prefers to leave untouched. It's refreshing and he feels his spirit lifting a bit. "Sounds good."

Ooooo

Mai frowns at the reports before her. Since Azula's loss, she has taken up the de facto position of Right Hand to the Fire Lord. Despite having her and Ty Lee as assistants, the princess had always opted to do most of the work herself, essentially leaving them in the dark. Now she is playing catch up. Flustered, she gathers up the scrolls and makes her way to Zuko's office.

The hour is late and the office is empty. Katara must have managed to coax him to bed finally. Mai sets about comparing the scrolls reporting troop and ship movements to the giant map laid out. Something doesn't seem right. She looks back at the paper in her hand back to the map again.

"Why move troops away from Caldera?" She asks herself, puzzled by what she is seeing. There had always been a healthy number of reinforcements around the capital to maintain order and security.

"Training exercises." The rasp in Zuko's voice is more pronounced with the weight of sleep.

Mai whips her head towards the Fire Lord's silhouette in the doorway. "The ships too? Zuko, you've left us undefended."

Zuko steps farther into the office, moving towards the table. "Who would attack? The city is too far from the Earth Kingdom for any force to get through. Besides our air ships will spot them long before they have a chance to surprise us."

"You aren't exactly the most popular right now." Mai points out. She has heard the rumblings of dissent among the peasants and nobility. Whispers of revolt drift upward from the merchant guild. Azula would have used this information to lay a trap.

Zuko meets her eyes from the other side of the table. He smirks. "It's late. You should sleep." She opens her mouth to argue but he cuts her off with a curt, "Good night, Mai."

The implied order in his voice nearly makes her flinch but she has dealt with Azula enough to know when to leave it be. Turning away she walks towards the door. Once there she chances a look back. Zuko steps from the table towards his desk. The torches in the room flare brighter under the Fire Lord's influence. The fires burn blue.

Oooo

Aang's world may have narrowed in focus but the rest of the world goes on. Sokka arrives in a balloon, bearing news Aang would rather avoid.

Sokka's face is heavily lined with concern as he hunches over a map of the Earth Kingdom. "It's getting rough out there. Theses villages here have been razed. Some made it out." He leaves the rest unsaid.

Aang measures the length of map Sokka traced. It's a heavily populated area. The civil war is causing more chaos. Ba Sing Se and Omashu are tearing the Earth Kingdom apart with their dispute. Innocents are suffering.

"If they keep going, they're going to wish you hadn't stopped Ozai."

Aang meets his friend's blue eyes sharply, challenge on the tip of his tongue but Toph chimes in. "It's one thing to have the guy you've hated your whole life destroy everything you worked for but not for your neighbors to do it. This is literally tearing families apart."

Brother against brother, father against son. Aang stands tall, contemplating the implications.

"Neither side is willing to concede. The peace talks have stalled." Sokka adds. "Aang, I know you're dealing with a lot right now. I get it, I really do, but you have to do something. People are dying."

"I'm tired of war." Aang replies. "I'm tired of fighting." He pauses, aware of the tension in his friends as they wait for his answer.A sense of resignation washes over him. "But I'm the Avatar." He looks closer at the map, noting the placement of Omashu and Ba Sing Se troops. Standing again, he meets Sokka's eyes. "Let's go."

Ooooo

The hour is late but Iroh knows Zuko's habits. He pauses at the sight of blue flames hovering above the Fire Lord in repose.

"I had not realized Azula passed on her secrets."

Zuko meets his eyes over the scroll in his hand. "What do you want, Uncle?"

Iroh smiles despite the harsh greeting. "I offered my condolences to your father." Mention of the former Fire Lord doesn't draw the scathing reaction Iroh expected. "He does not seem to be dealing with Azula's passing well."

Zuko sits back in his chair, closed off and distant. "Meaning?"

Iroh settles into one of the chairs before the desk. Zuko's glowing eyes watching his every movement. "Your father is under the impression that you are to blame for her death and that it was no accident." Zuko doesn't react. He only stares in the same eerie way Azula once did. The princess may not have meant to pass on her secrets but Zuko has always had a knack for overcoming obstacles. "I assumed him to be overwhelmed with grief and seeking to place blame where none was due."

Zuko sweeps his gaze across the room as he stands. Iroh watches the slow regal way he paces the room to the window. He speaks to the darkened panes. "I thought he understood."

"His grief may have kept him from fully understanding." Iroh ventures, uncertain of his nephew's thoughts. "Perhaps you should explain it to him again."

Zuko sighs. Ozai understands more than Zuko could ever explain. He knew before Azula left that it would end this way. Zuko knew in a way. "Ozai said you had visions of Lu Ten's death. Is that true?"

Iroh closes his eyes against the pang of loss beating in his chest. It seems to be a lifetime ago. "Yes, I had a vision that I ignored as worry."

"It came true. Lu Ten died." Zuko states quietly.

Iroh replies with a short nod. He feels the pinch of tears behind his eyes.

Zuko faces him, eyes bright and curious. "In my vision, Azula fell. She died. I sent her anyway."

"You had visions?" Iroh asks with concern.

Zuko nods as he steps closer to him. "Ozai did as well. I told Azula. She said I worried too much and that she would return." Iroh shakes his head, eyes locked on Zuko's approach. When he reaches the desk, Zuko kneels beside Iroh's chair, gaze fixed on the small urn on his desk. "My whole life was spent in her shadow. I hated her when we were growing up. I wished her dead during the war. I ignored her in the asylum. Then she came back and I couldn't imagine my life without her. Now…." Zuko shakes his head. "I don't know what I will do."

Iroh places a reassuring hand on Zuko's shoulder. "You soldier on. You have a country to run. A family to raise. Despite the past, Azula wanted you to be happy and she wanted the Fire Nation to be strong."

Zuko's gaze remains fixed on the jar as he replies. "Azula wanted to destroy our enemies. She wanted to roast those who opposed me in the Fire Nation and she wanted to rip Ba Sing Se apart from the inside. I would be wrong if I said I didn't want that too."

Iroh can only gape in horror. "Nephew, that is not the way. Using fear and terror to subdue is what your father would have done, what our father and grandfather did."

The room heats uncomfortably as Zuko looks to Iroh. "Uncle, the things Azula and I did, the things we've done..." He clenches his eyes shut and bows his head. "There's no coming back from that."

Iroh grasps the back of Zuko's neck, pulling the younger man into an embrace. He has heard whispers of just how Zuko regained control of the Fire Nation, of how Azula ended the threats against the Fire Lord. "There is always a way back, Zuko. Nothing is written in stone. It's not too late."

Eventually, Zuko pulls back, eyes bright and clear as he meets the older man's eyes. "No, Uncle, Azula was right, but she didn't go far enough." Iroh feels the blood rush from his face as Zuko speaks. "I want to raze the Earth Kingdom to the ground for what they have taken from us, for what they took from Azula. I want to avenge my sister. I want to finish what she started when she took Ba Sing Se."