First and foremost, I have to give thanks to my betas: readergoof and jfk06! They help make my chapters rock awesome! You two are the best! I love the little comments you leave me!
Next, everyone, *please don't be mad at me for this jfk06*, extend your congratulations to jfk06 for the birth of a health baby girl, weighing 6lb 9oz. This little cutie is about 2 months and 4 days old and has the most adorable name! Mikayla Rose! How drool worthy is that? I swear I'm going to remember it so I can use it in a story! But, anywho, extend your congratulations! And, keep your fingers crossed that she passed her bar exam! She won't find out till like November!
I've created a Facebook page for Wishing Star! Come pop by! Feel free to leave comments, submit artwork to me, I'll post it! And look for excerpts from chapters and who knows what else!
http:/ www . facebook . com / pages / Wishing-Star / 136127973086669
For those of you concerned about lack of reactions to something in this chapter, hold tight till next chapter! Reactions come, just not in this one.
BPOV
The blaring of my alarm clock woke me the next morning and I blindly reached over to shut it off. Not feeling it in its usual position, I started sweeping my hand across the nightstand trying to locate it. The fact that the annoying beeping had stopped without my shutting it off failed to register in my sleep fogged mind.
Groggily, I cracked open an eye, wondering where my alarm clock had gone. Did I knock it to the floor? I hadn't felt it, so if I had done that, then I'd done it while I was sleeping. But, never once before in my life had I done that, so why would I suddenly do it now?
"Bella?" I knew that sleepy voice. "Is there a reason you feel the need to molest my nightstand?"
I froze my movements, the prior night flooding my mind. My yelling at my siblings. Talking with Edward. Watching CSI in Edward's…room. I'd fallen asleep. With Edward. I'd slept with Edward. No wonder I didn't feel as groggy as I usually did. I'd actually gotten a good night's sleep. That cinched it. The sleeping pills did not help, only Edward did. Well, at least when it came to sleeping.
"Bella?" he pressed, as I felt his warm breath tickle my ear.
"No, I just forgot where I was. I was trying to find my alarm clock," I answered, my thoughts going a mile a minute. What had I been telling myself last night? Right. Just feel, Bella. Just feel.
"I reset the alarm for you. I'll see you when I get back from classes," Edward murmured, kissing my temple. I felt the bed shift and knew he'd gotten up.
When I heard the click of his bedroom door, signaling his departure, I let out the air I hadn't realized I'd been holding. Maybe I need to start reminding myself to breathe, as well as feel. Rolling over to nestle my head into his pillow, I tried going back to sleep. But part of me kept arguing that it was pointless since Edward wasn't in the bed anymore. Finally giving up, I rolled onto my back staring up at the ceiling.
I loved Edward. I had for a long time, though I'd been unaware of it. I wanted Edward both physically and mentally. He was my life. My source of comfort and security. Edward felt… Well, I'd leave that for later.
He wasn't with Tanya anymore. He wasn't rebounding since he'd tossed her. He'd been waiting on us girls practically hand and foot, trying to make up for his behavior. He'd even willingly gone shopping with Alice. Yeah, color us shocked.
I sat up, smacking my forehead with the heel of my palm. Why the hell was I analyzing this? Reverse that: over-analyzing this.
Everything boiled down to not knowing how Edward felt about me. But how would I ever find out if I hid away and didn't live? I'd be opening myself up for heartbreak, but hadn't I already found out that it was part of life? At least this time I knew that whatever the outcome, the Cullens weren't going to go anywhere. They'd still be my family.
I loved Edward and more than anything I wanted to be with him. If I got hurt, so be it. Live and learn. Hindsight is always twenty-twenty. Opportunity was knocking and I didn't want to miss it because I hadn't opened the door. I needed to take the chance, now, while I had it. If Edward never loved me back, then I would take what I could get for now and enjoy the hell out of it.
Feel, Bella. That's all you have to do is feel. Let your heart guide you and feel. Stop thinking so much. What comes will come. Maybe… Scratch maybe… It is time to start enjoying the ride.
EPOV
I flew up the steps and into the house, hoping someone was home. I needed to share the news I had with someone. It was too exciting to keep to myself.
"Hello! Anyone here?" I yelled, tossing my backpack on the floor by the door. "Hello?"
"Edward?" Bella's voice reached me just before she stepped into view from the guest room she'd be occupying. Fuck, I really wanted her to be in my bed, even if it was just to sleep.
"I'm going to France!" I exclaimed running over to her and picking her up before twirling her in a circle.
"What?" she giggled, her eyes sparkling as she looked down at my face while holding onto my shoulders. Oh god. That sound was going straight to my cock as it had a tendency to do more and more lately.
"There's an exchange program going on. Certain students get to go to another country to study medicine there. My grades qualify me. I'm going to France!" I rushed out, thrilled that she was the first one I got to tell, needing her to be the first one I shared my good news with.
"That's great!" Bella cried out, her face showing how happy she was for me.
I set her down, keeping my hands on her waist. "Is anyone else home?"
"No," she shook her head. "Emmett and Jasper had to go into work early. Rose is still at work, and Alice hasn't gotten back from her classes. It's just you and me."
"Really?" I smirked, liking the idea. "Movie?"
"CSI? In your room?" she shot back at me, grinning.
"I'll get the show prepped and you go get the popcorn. Deal?" I asked, leaning down to kiss her temple, feeling her nod.
I walked back over to the front door, grabbed my backpack and headed up to my room. The room Bella had slept in the night before. I'd woken up curled around her, the alarm blaring. I shut it off, turning to see Bella moving her hand around my nightstand. She'd looked so cute – tired, groggy and searching for her alarm clock.
Last night had been a shock. I didn't expect Bella to fall asleep, but once she had, I couldn't bring myself to take her to her own bed. I knew how badly she'd been sleeping and the opportunity to help her get a good night's rest was too good to pass up. The bags under her eyes weren't as prominent today as they had been yesterday. Given the time of the day though, I held little hope that I'd manage to get her to sleep in my room again, despite how badly I wanted her too.
"Popcorn is here!" Bella announced coming into my room. I smiled over at her, putting the last DVD into my player. I turned around, seeing Bella making herself comfortable on my bed. Well, there was always a chance she was still tired and would fall asleep while watching CSI.
"Ready?" I inquired, sitting down next to her and snagging a handful of popcorn. Bella snuggled up against my side, putting the bowl of popcorn on my lap.
"Yep." And with that one word, I started the DVD player.
BPOV
I paced the floor in my room. It was ten and I'd excused myself an hour ago under the pretense of going to bed. That had been an hour ago. No one questioned my leaving. After all, I hadn't been sleeping well and they knew it. But, last night I'd slept great because I'd been in Edward's arms.
I was now debating the pros and cons of ditching this guest room for sleeping purposes and taking up residence in Edward's bed. Hmm…Edward had never objected to me sleeping in the same bed as him, so I didn't doubt the welcome.
Gads! What the fuck was I doing? What had I told myself this morning? To feel! To live! To enjoy! How was I going to accomplish that if I was pacing back and forth in my room debating it? Glancing at the clock, I saw only a half hour had passed. Bloody hell.
Come on, Bella. Put one foot in front of the other and soon you'll be walking cross the flo-o-or. Put one foot in front of the other and soon you'll be walking out the do-o-or!
Taking a deep breath, I opened the door to my room and left. Emmett and Jasper were still at work, while Rose and Alice were in their respective rooms. You can do this, Bella. I sprinted up the stairs to the second floor, stopping and looking at the stairs to the third. I climbed them more slowly, taking a deep breath before knocking on Edward's door.
"Enter!" he called out and I opened the door, hesitantly shutting it behind me and leaning against it. "Bella?"
"Umm…" I chewed on my bottom lip for a moment, looking at the floor and twisting my hands together. Edward walked over to where I stood.
"Bella, it's okay. What do you need?" Edward's hand lifted my chin, so I was looking into his eyes. They held a softness that I never saw when he'd looked at Tanya. Caring.
"I was, uh… I was wondering if it would… Um, that is," I mumbled, trying to get out the words and not sure how to put the sentence together. Why did stuff like this have to be easier said then done? I didn't have any doubts to his answer, so why was I bumbling my way through it? Why? I finally rushed out, "CanIsleephere?"
"Say that again, slowly," Edward chuckled. Taking my hand he walked me over to his bed, pulling me between his legs as he sat us down. "What is your question?"
"Can I sleep here?" I repeated, slowly, looking at the floor.
"Of course. I was just about to go to bed myself. Come on," he answered, pulling back the covers and holding them up for me to climb under.
"Thanks, Edward," I whispered, snuggling against him.
"No problem."
EmPOV
"I'm going to go check on Bella before going to bed," I told Jasper as we headed into the house. I did it every night after getting home from work. I'd picked the lock and relocked the door afterwards. She never knew and I felt better for knowing she was alright.
The only time I hadn't done it was this past week because she'd been barricading the door, preventing me entry. Funny enough, the one night I did do it, finding the way bared, she didn't seem to notice the door unlocked the next morning, or if she had, she'd attributed it to Edward trying to get in. Had to give the dude props, he'd learned to pick Bella's lock himself.
The door to Bella's room was open and I paused for a moment. I hadn't heard her out and about, so… Had something happened to her? Edward's car was out front and so were each of the girls'. Peeking around the door, I saw her bed was empty and unslept in. Okay, something was definitely up.
Turning around, I rushed upstairs to Edward's room. He'd been the one home all night with the girls and would know. Right? He'd know. He had to know. Bella had to be all right. She had to be. Throwing open the door, I didn't care that it banged against the wall. I had to fucking find Bella and ensure she was safe.
"Emmett?" Edward's voice cut through the dark as I rushed over to the bed.
"Bella? Where the fuck is Bella? She's not in her room. Is she safe? Is she okay? I know she's been different since James-" I ranted, not questioning myself as to why I was so concerned. Bella was my sister and shit had happened to her. I had to ensure her safety. It was my job.
Shifting slightly in his bed, Edward interrupted me before I could go any further. I could now see a small form curled up against him. "She's right here, Emmett. Calm down."
I breathed a sigh of relief seeing Bella in Edward's bed. "What's she doing here?"
"She came up and asked if she could sleep in my bed. I told her yes," Edward said, lying back down. "Go to bed, Emmett. Bella's fine."
I nodded in relief. "Sorry about the door."
"No problem, man. Go to bed."
I left Edward's room, making sure to shut the door behind me. The worry I felt over Bella drained out of my body, leaving me spent. At the bottom of the stairs, I leaned back against the wall. Rose, I needed Rose and not to fuck. Pushing away from the wall, I headed to my room to change into my pajamas. I clicked on the light, revealing a wealth of blonde hair on my pillow.
Not wanting to possibly wake her more, I quickly shut off the light again, shedding my clothes as fast as I could. Right now I wanted to feel my Rosie against me, just for comfort. That was it. I needed the comfort of home.