Kimihito, or "MC"

I noticed Juyo glaring at me when I picked Mario, which strongly suggested that he knew what I was up to. In response, I just gave him an unassuming smile that had an underlying challenge to it.

I dare you to pick a ranged fighter.

Now, I almost never feel the need to be competitive in anything. I've always preferred the slow and steady approach to things, though that's not to say I didn't make impulsive decisions from time to time. The motto of moderation has been passed down the Kurusu line for generations, simple as that.

But after a few manic battles against everyone else, let's just say a… spark, of sorts, was ignited in my eyes. A spark that wanted me to win. I would accept defeat with grace, of course, but if I managed to win a battle here or there, that would be quite dandy.

Juyo smirked back at me and selected ROB. I nodded in appreciation of his gutsy choice.

For the uninitiated, one of Mario's moves involved him swinging a cloth at his opponent. As a straightforward attack, it was useless since it had little range and did less damage. However, it always reflected back any projectiles it hit and reversed anyone who tried to engage in close range. It was safe to say that Mario could be a nightmare in the right hands, especially when put against fighters who specialized in attacking from far away.

I'd played my fair share of Melee back in the day, so I knew a thing or two about that.

"You're playing Mario, Darling?" Miia piped up at my side, "Then I want to be Princess Peach!"

"It's just a game, Miia," I told her with a tired smile, "You can be whoever you want."

"And I want to be your princess!" she responded in kind as she selected Peach.

"Aw, but I wanted to be Peach," complained Tio.

"You can still be her, you know," Juyo spoke, "You'll just be a different color is all."

Tio beamed at him. "Really! Yay yay!"

"… But I don't wanna share…" Miia pouted.

"Don't worry," I assured her, pointing up at the screen, "You're still the real Princess Peach to me, Miia."

"Oh, Darling!" Miia latched onto my side, nuzzling her cheek on my shoulder, "You're so sweet!"

I laughed and looked back at the screen. I'd had some difficulty picking my nickname, so Juyo suggested "MC" for some reason. Since I couldn't think of anything else, I just went along with it. And now it was Doppel's turn to choose the stage and…

My heart sank when I saw that she chose The Great Cave Offensive. Again. Everyone except for Doppel and Suu groaned. Rachnera was busy laughing.

Miia, or "Darling Love!"

I think I prefer Mario Kart over Super Smash. At least I can keep track of most of the things that happen in that game!

Still, a lot of the characters are super cute! I just wanna cuddle with a plush Kirby or Pikachu. Oh, and Jigglypuff, too!

Zelda is my favorite, though. She's so cool! She's a princess and a magical girl, two things I've always wanted to be! Peach is a close second, though, especially because of that pretty move where she hits someone with her hips and a big heart comes out!

Hm… could it be she uses the power of love? Perhaps if I practice that same move, I could somehow make sure Darling falls for me with the power of my hips alone!

Okay, sure, it's just a video game, but a girl can dream, right?

Papi, or "PAPIPAPI"

"Weeeeee!"

"Papi, you can't just run around the map over and over again. I know you're Sonic and all, but-"

"Gotta go fast!"

"I understand," Big Brother sighed, "But you can't win if you-"

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"I'm trying to help you-!"

"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"… Never mind."

Centorea, or "Saber"

"Have at thee!" I shouted at my foe, bidding my noble avatar, Lucina, to charge.

This game was the purest experience I could ever ask for: a simple, straightforward, and glorious battle between honorable combatants! Truly, Super Smash Bros. was an arena where only those with a true warrior's spirit could triumph!

My opponent, a humanoid frog played by Doppel, did nothing in response to my attack save for striking an odd pose. Thinking little of it, I struck home…

Only to have her teleport behind me and kick me hard in the back, sending me hurtling into the air.

"Deceit and trickery!" I cursed as I spun to face Doppel. "You dare not face me head on?!"

She quirked an eyebrow at me, and simply replied with "Doppelganger," as if that explained everything.

"Prepare yourself," I warned her, turning back to see Lucina begin her descent back to the stage, "I will not allow a knight's honor to be dismissed so lightly!"

"I'm figuratively quaking in my figurative boots," Doppel replied drolly.

After landing a series of swings and sending her flying off into the distance, seeing the smirk drop from her face was most satisfying.

Suu, or "BESTGIRL"

I read his mind (he offered!) to learn more. I like doing that. He always seems like he's worrying about stuff, and I can tell he gets calmer when I do it. So I do it.

I read his mind so I could play the game with everyone else more quickly. I learned a lot. Dodging, smashing, edge-guarding, grabbing. But when I went through his memories, I saw something I liked a lot. He had a friend who had a habit of picking certain characters that were ideal for taking others out with them, like Bowser, Donkey Kong, and Kirby.

His friend looked so happy, so I thought I'd be happy too if I did the same thing. And I am! I do it over and over again and it's fun every time!

I don't think everyone else likes it, though. Oh well! I'm happy, and he's happy, so who cares?

Mero, or "Ariel"

I have to admit, I do see the appeal of the game for the others, even if it really isn't for me. I much prefer watching, especially witnessing a brave warrior struggling to survive up until the very end, just when they're struck down by the cruel hand of fate (usually Doppel)!

It wasn't nearly as sublime as a tragic romance, but it was tragedy all the same.

Still, watching the mayhem on the TV was not nearly as demanding as the events unfolding right before me. Namely, the fact that my dear sir may already have started a tragic romance on his own.

Without me.

He seemed completely at ease around this Zombina woman, despite the heated banter the two shared. There was rarely a moment where they weren't talking to each other, either to trade mock-insults or simply chatting. And, if her fellow MON Squad members were to be believed, they were in constant communication.

Could it be that I wasn't fast enough? I had hoped to engage in a tragic romance with the dimensional traveler, falling in love with each other until we were inevitably forced apart when he had to return to his home dimension. As lovers divided by time and space, the sweet tragedy of it all would make any mermaid fill with ecstasy!

But when I look at Juyo now, and see him with Zombina, those thoughts only arise after I force myself to consider them. Instead, all I can think about is that time he held me in his arms, singing in the rain.

Could my situation have gotten even more tragic than I'd anticipated it to?

Rachnera, or "Charlotte"

Well, I can safely say I've had worse first days with host families.

This game they played looked like it had little rhyme or reason to it, at least on the surface. You'd certainly get that impression if you watched certain players, like Papi, Tionishia, and Miia, who blindly flailed about the battleground. But when you watched the more… experienced players, you'd see the method to the madness.

My host displayed a cunning that I'd never suspected from such a mild-mannered man, swiftly reacting to everything thrown at him and responding in kind. Doppel was the trickiest of them all, which was hardly a surprise, using the environment to her advantage in a way no one else could be. Zombina, while prone to fits of berserker fury here and there, was at least aware of the flow of battle and acted accordingly. Suu clearly had the potential, if her prolonged battles with Centorea were any indication, but she tended to squander that skill on taking opponents out with her, to no real advantage of her own.

Then there was that confusing bearded boy from another dimension. He had no clear skill that set him apart from everyone else, no trump card or secret knowledge that allowed him a landslide victory. But he was almost always among the last three survivors, and even won from time to time.

He was very… ordinary, in his every action. He smack-talked with Zombina and Doppel, offered encouragement to Suu, gave pointers to those who were clearly struggling, and was overall incredibly normal and honest.

So what had happened to the man who'd rubbed me the wrong way so much last night?

Smith, or "MIB"

Why won't anyone answer my damn calls?! I'm neck-deep in paperwork over here and they won't even allow me the right to distract myself with making snarky comments at them!

You know what, screw it. It's close enough to my lunch break, so I might as well drop by that house and see just what's so great that they can just ignore my desperate pleas for help.

Zombina, or "Fullmetal Zeke"

"Why, Suu?" Centorea pleaded, face in her hands, "Why must you give such a false victory every time?!"

Suu simply giggled in response.

"At least you managed to last longer than two minutes," I groaned, leaning back against the couch. "Fuckin' tactical genius over here zoned me like a motherfucker."

"You kept trying to get in my corner," Juyo replied matter-of-factly, "You could've left me alone at anytime."

"And let you keep shooting fire and lightning at everyone from the sidelines? Yeah, no way."

"You can hardly fault Counselor-san for choosing the easy way," Rachnera chided, a smirk on her lips, "He is the veteran player here, after all, so of course he'd know how to win."

"Except I didn't win," he noted, with a small amount of irritation that made me feel warm and fuzzy inside, "Thanks to bullshit."

"Aw, you say the sweetest things!" Doppel jeered at him, "You can hardly blame me; I had to avenge my fallen teammate."

I snorted. "Thanks, Doppel-chan. Nice to hear ya care about my well-being for once. When it suits ya, of course."

"But of course!"

Yeah, I was diggin' this. I should drop by here more often!

Tionishia, or "Have fun!"

"GAME!"

"Wait, I won?" I stared at the screen in disbelief, before cheering and clapping for myself, "I did it! I won, I won!"

"Unbelievable," Doppel whined, "Your slow Bowser ass somehow hit me."

"Now, now, Doppel-chan," I scolded her, "You know what they say about a positive attitude?"

"Enlighten me."

I grinned at her. "Positive attitude, positive kill/death ratio!"

"That sounds more scary than encouraging…" Miia murmured.

"Only if you have a negative attitude!" I corrected.

Manako, or "Ignore Me"

Please don't look at me, please don't look at me, please don't look at me…

Boom!

An enormous ball of blue energy smashed into Captain Falcon, launching him sky high.

"Gah! Mana-chan?! The hell did ya come from?!" Zombina shouted in dismay.

"S-Sorry," I stuttered, looking away from her, "I j-j-just saw an opening and t-t-took it…"

"Eh, whatever," she replied with a shrug, outrage fading. "Knew I had missed someone."

Without another word, I moved Samus away from the constantly moving battle and found another nice corner to start charging my attack.

Please don't look at me, please don't look at me…

Doppel, or "Behind You"

[REDACTED]