AN: WARNING: Serious Trigger Warning! Self-Harm involved.

Evie laid back and sighed as a guard handcuffed her wrist to the bed. "Y'know there's no point in that. I'm getting my baby scanned I'd like to see it."

The guard just ignored her and as soon as the cuffs where secured tightly around her wrist he left the room. Steve sat down on her other side and took her hand. She pulled it away from him but turned her head towards him. "Why are you here? Haven't the Avengers gone back to the tower?"

"They have." Steve shrugged, everyone headed back there the day after the funeral, partly because it made it easier to help with the clean-up but mostly because everyone just wanted to go home. Irene, Mycroft and Leo decided to stay there as well because they weren't ready to go back and see Sherlocks stuff just yet. Steve also went home back came to see Evie as soon as he woke up. "But I'm here because I love you and want to see your baby's first scan."

"Why? It's not your kid."

Steve hesitated. "No. It's not. But I want to have a place in his or her life. Whether it's as a father figure or just a friend."

"Father figure?"

Steve hesitated, "Once this daemon is out of you, if you want to try our relationship again, then I would love that. It'd be difficult at first but I'm more than willing to try." Evie opened her mouth to say something but Steve held up a hand to stop her. "I'm not saying you do. This is a hypothetical situation. But if this did happen, I would be there for this child. I'll treat him or her like my own."

"You're the one that broken up with me." Evie reminded him.

Steve nodded. "Yeah, I did and I regret it. But at that time I thought you were happy with Regalis."

"I was!"

"No. You thought you were happy with Loki. But you're daemonised. Your feelings aren't your own."

Evie scowled, "No. I love him."

Steve shook his head (Evie reminded him of a sulky teenager) but before he could reply a woman walked in and smiled at them, she was average height with blonde hair and a too cheerful face. "Hello! I'm Chloe; I'm gonna be your midwife Evie so it's nice to meet you."

Evie just rose an eyebrow at her and Steve sighed standing up and hold out his hand to shake, his own hand was trembling from the nerve damage but Chloe either didn't notice or didn't want to say anything as she shook his hand. "Nice to meet you Chloe. Sorry about Evie, she's having a bad day. I assume you've been briefed about this situation?"

"I have. Pleasure to meet you, Captain." Steve smiled and sat back down as Chloe took the seat on the other side of Evie and pulled the screen closer. She picked up a tube of the gel from a shelf under the screen and smiled at Evie, "Could you lift up your shirt please?"

Evie shook her head, "Not until you bring Loki here."

Chloe cocked her head in question and Steve sighed, "She's been demanding for him to come but I've told you Evie, he's in Asgard." The lie easily rolled off his tongue. "He'll be brought back on the New Moon." they had explained to Evie what was to happen but told her that Loki had been taken back to Asgard to ensure he wouldn't attempt an escape before he's needed to remove the daemon.

"Well I want to see him now. He needs to see his baby"

Steve sighed, "Look I'll get Thor to take him a picture or whatever but stop acting like a child Evie."

Evie glared at Steve, "Right, so if I was demanding to see you I'd still be acting like a child? Or is that just 'cause you don't want him here?"

"Yes. If I wasn't available and you were still demanding. Then yes you would be." Steve answered immediately.

Evie sighed but finally lifted her shirt up. Chloe sent Steve a grateful look.

"Right Evie, this is gonna be cold alright?" Evie shrugged and then sucked in a breath when Chloe put a blob of the gel on her stomach before grabbing the wand and moving it around to spread the gel over her stomach. Turning the screen on, the screen was opposite Evie so both her and Steve looked up at it. Once it was on Chloe moved softly at it, most of the screen was slightly grey and white with a black shape in the middle where it looked as if something lay inside about 2 cm long - though the screen was small, and Chloe later told Steve that the baby would actually be about six centimetres.

Chloe smiled at it for a minutes, pressing a few buttons that neither Steve nor Evie knew what she was doing before turning back to them, "The foetus is right here," she pointed at the screen, "Can you see it?" Evie nodded, she had suddenly stopped fidgeting and fighting the bonds and was now staring unblinkingly at the small screen. "Everything looks healthy. I'll leave you alone for a few minutes?" she looked more at Steve than at Evie and Steve nodded.

"Yes, please."

Chloe nodded and left the room. Evie reached out towards the screen and lightly touched the spot where the foetus lay, "Evie?" Steve spoke softly, Evie looked at him and for the first time in a long tine Steve saw Evie. The girl he used to know. The woman he loved. Then it was gone, her eyes hardened and her hand moved back to her side.

"Yeah?"

"I just- are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Loki should see this."

Steve sighed hearing that name again, he just felt so angry every time she mentioned it but there wasn't much he could so about it so he just dealt with it. "I'll give Thor a picture or something." he didn't want to but he knew Evie wouldn't shut up about it if he didn't.

"Promise me you will." Evie said, she put her hand on his arm and Steve swallowed, he wanted to lean into the touch but he also wanted to pull away but he knew if he pulled away it would send the wrong signal, so instead he didn't move.

"I'll speak to Thor about it. I don't know if they'll have a way to see it in Asgard." He lied knowing that he'd just take a TV to Loki's cell.

Evie nodded, "That's acceptable." she turned back to the screen, her eyes softening again. "She's beautiful."

"She?"

"Feels like a she."

"Any idea for names?"

Evie shrugged. "I'll speak to Loki when I see him."

"You're not going to get a huge time to talk."

"He deserves to have some say in his child's name."

"Yes. But we're not leaving you two alone."

"How are you even making him come to remove the daemon? Or by force?"

Steve shrugged. "I'm not involved with that bit. Fury or someone might, try asking them."He didn't want to tell Evie that Loki was being blackmailed with knowledge of his baby. Steve knew she'd hate it and hate him for it.

The door opened again and Chloe walked in. Immediately Evie's eyes hardened again as she looked up at Chloe.

"Alright to come in?"

"Well I'd like to go back to my cell if we're all done here."

Chloe nodded, and quickly put a dry cloth over her belly to get rid of the gel, before pushing the door back open and nodded, a guard that had been waiting outside the door walked into the room and unlocked Evie's arm. Steve stepped back and watched the guard lead Evie out not speaking a word.

She didn't look back.

"Do you think she'd like a picture of that?"

Steve nodded, "I need to show it to Loki anyway."

She nodded and typed something on the screen and they waited a moment before an A5 black and white picture emerged from the printer. She put it in a plastic sleeve to protect it and then handed it to Steve.

"Thank you." Steve nodded at her, "I'll see you soon and can you keep me updated on anything that happens?"

"Of course, Captain." She shook his hand again before he left the room.

Loki looked up at his entrance before looking back down at his book, uninterested in anything Steve had to say. He was sat on the other end of the cell on the bench, one leg on the bench in front of him, the other resting on the floor and his arm holding the book was resting on his knee.

"Evie made me promise to show you this," Steve spoke up and at Evie's name Loki looked up, he looked wary but placed his book down – Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy Steve realised it was – and stood up heading towards Steve, standing a foot away from the glass and looking like talking to Steve would probably be the most boring things to ever happen to him.

Steve was stood slightly closer despite his urge to step back and he held up the picture. "A picture of the scan. The baby." He knew Asgard wouldn't have any such technology and the scans weren't very clear on what exactly it was if you didn't know already.

Steve saw the realisation in his eyes and Loki subconsciously stepped closer to the glass placing his hand on it, his eyes locked on the picture. Steve could see the vulnerability and love in his eyes and hated it but he just held up the picture remembering his promise to Evie.

After a minute, Steve lowered his hand and Loki's eyes hardened, stepping back but Steve could still see a slight vulnerability in them along with nervousness, "Thank you." Loki said quietly not looking him in his eyes, "For bringing this. You did not have to."

"I gave Evie my word." Steve then turned his back on Loki and left the room.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The sound of water hitting tiles was the only noise, apart from his own heavy breathing, that penetrated Mycroft's ears.

He sat in the bathroom under the pretence of needed a shower. Irene had barely let him out of her sight since... since.

They were living in the Stark tower, most of the Avengers had moved back there as they helped with the clean-up but headed to the base during most of the day.

She knew what he wanted. But she couldn't watch him in the shower, they were close but not that close.

He hadn't completely lied. He did need a shower and that's where he sat. Under the running shower, ignoring it as it splashed around him and into his eyes.

He had razor in one hand bare arm resting on his knee.

Scar filled bare arm.

Past his elbow was where the new cuts lay. It was easier to hide them, especially when Irene was watching him so closely.

He remembered the first time he had done it after the battle.

It had been a few days after the battle in which he hadn't been alone, at least not for long enough to harm himself. Irene had taken all of razors, she tried to be subtle about it but she wasn't. She took 10 minutes brushing her teeth beside him just to be there when he was shaving.

First time he was alone was after the small meeting with Fury.

Steve had gone to see Evie and the others had gone to do their own thing, so Mycroft told Irene he needs a shower. She started to follow him and he rolled his eyes, "'Rene, I love you but I think I should shower alone."

Irene hesitated for a minute before she nodded, "Yeah course, just getting a drink."

"Well kitchens the other way." He pointed and Irene nodded before turning and walking away.

Mycroft managed to find a shaving razor in Bruce's room and he sat in his shower breathing heavily, the water splashing around him drowning out the sound of his own breathing.

He held the razor tightly in his hand.

He knew that Sherlock would be disappointed in him but it didn't matter. Sherlock can't be disappointed when he's not here.

The last time he had got the urge was when Aunt Maggie died but he was too busy looking after Evie. The same with Jacob, he had been his friends. He had been wanting to but he had managed to resist. With all his friends around him, he could resist, but with Evie daemonised, Irene – yes Irene was there but he felt smothered – and his main form of comfort, Sherlock was gone, the reason he wanted the pain, he couldn't resist.

It was his fault. Sherlock had been saving his life. If he had just moved Sherlock would still be alive. He may as well have thrown the knife.

So he pressed the blade into his leg, softly at first before pressing harder and harder smiling into the pain. God he had missed this.

He did it a few more times before cleaning up, wrapping up the razor in tissue paper and then putting it back in his pocket and heading back to the kitchen feeling slightly more relaxed than he had in a long time – but guilty too.

He ran his hands through his wet hair as he gripped the new razor tightly in his hand, he still feels guilty, every time, Sherlock would be disappointed in him but then he remembered that Sherlock is dead. He can't be disappointed.

Sherlock is dead and it's his fault, he just should have moved.

Half of himself is gone and the pain and the guilt is too much, it fills him up so much he can't breathe! He can't think! He just can't do anything!

He was empty. He had nothing to live for but he was too much of a coward to end it.

He pressed the razor to his skin sighing in pleasure as the sharp cold metal pierced his skin. The physical pain makes him forget the emotional pain.

He knew exactly how deep he could go before it get dangerous, he had learnt from experience.

But that didn't mean also he kept the correct deepness, sometimes purposely, sometimes by accident, he usually ended up going deeper than he had originally planned. The first few cuts would be soft and shallow. Enough to hurt and bleed but as the feeling of power, control, anger, fear and pain spread through him, Mycroft just cut deeper and deeper.

The red hot liquid flowed down his arm, the water hit it and washed the blood away, down the drain and Mycroft stared at it in wonder. It made him feel so alive and dead at the same time.

He knew what Evie would say, she would try to comfort him tell him it's okay and they'll get through this. But he didn't want to get through this!

He knew that Irene was act very professional about this, try to talk to him and he'd just make a comment that he should just pay her as his physiatrist but she would tell him she's his friend not his physiatrist but they would end up arguing.

Sherlock, oh God Sherlock.

Sherlock would just sit silently at his side as Mycroft cried. Sherlock would put his hand on Mycrofts back in silent comfort and slowly take the razor away before hugging Mycroft and promising that he'd fix it all 'brother mine'.

Then he'd say all the right things.

But nobody understood the craving Mycroft had. He couldn't stand it, it made his skin itch.

He pressed the blade into his skin just below the first one and slide it across. The pain was perfect not uncontrollable pain but not too little.

He shuddered in pleasure and lent his head against the wall closing his eyes.

The tingling pain was incredible. He had missed this; it drove all other thoughts away.

He could feel the warm blood slipping down his arm.

Mycroft opened his eyes and this time he pushed deeper. He wanted it to leave a scar.

He moaned softly as pain flared across his arm. More blood, a lot more blood staining his pain skin.

A knock on the door pulled Mycroft away from the pleasure and his head shot up to the door, "Croft? You doing alright?" Irene called and Mycroft sighed. He loves Irene and he feel like she's the only one they've got left out of their four marauders but she's just smothering him, not letting him breath. He just couldn't deal with this.

He knows she only trying to look after him but he hates it.

"I'm fine." He answered surprised at how clear his voice was. "I'll be out in a few."

"Okay." Irene sounded concerned but he didn't care as he heard her footsteps padding away. Sighing Mycroft stood up and stood under the water for a few minutes just letting himself get clean. When he was done, he dried and clothed himself, making sure his upper arm was covered.

Once the blood was gone it left ugly red welts that had once been smooth, clean and bloody cuts.

He didn't like the welts as much but he did enjoy the pain they gave.

He put the razor into his pocket, it was new so sharp enough to use again.

When he left the bathroom Irene stared at him worriedly but he just smiled at her. His perfected mask. Irene would see past it, of course she would but she didn't comment knowing that he could just clam up.

She smiled back at him, "I'm gonna make some pasta for dinner, just us tonight, everyone's helping with the clean-up and Steve's with Evie. It's her scan today."

"Yeah. That's fine." Mycroft shrugged.

"Do you want anything with you pasta?"

"Cheese."

Irene rolled her eyes, "Anything on the side?"

Mycroft sighed taking a deep breath, "I don't care. Anything. Actually I'm not hungry."

"You need to eat."

"Not when I'm not hungry."

"You're rarely hungry anymore."

"Then stop trying to feed me."

"Croft-"

"No Irene!" Mycroft yelled finally having enough. "I can't do this anymore alright! I'll eat when I'm hungry. I'd like to take a shower without you interrupting me halfway through to make sure I'm not cutting! I just want time to myself okay? Without you smothering me!"

"I'm sorry Mycroft I'm just-"

"Worried. I know! My brother is dead, it's my fault, the guilty is eating me up but I'm dealing and grieving like a normal person! But I can't do anything without you there and it's pissing me off!"

Irene closed her eyes taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

Mycroft shook his head suddenly feeling guilty but he couldn't deal with any more guilt right now so he pushed it away and just shrugged. "It's fine. Just don't follow me everywhere. Please." With that he turned and walked away, waiting a moment but he didn't hear any footsteps.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Bruce came home first, he came to check on Irene and Mycroft but he could only find Irene in the kitchen, she was standing by the blender holding down the button. The stuff inside looked as if it had been blended much more than necessary.

"Irene?" he spoke up and Irene jumped, releasing the button and the machine made a noise reminding Bruce of a sigh of relief.

"Bruce, hey." She smiled softly at him but he could see worry in her eyes.

"Are you doing ok?"

Irene shrugged, "I'm dealing. Mycroft isn't. But I'm an idiot. I've been smothering him. I'm a freaking physiologist. I should know the right procedures to take in this care but he's my friend Bruce, it's different, I can't say the same things because he'll take it differently and it won't be enough of me showing him that I'm here for him because he needs to know but I don't know how to show him this without him taking it in the wrong way. He could be doing anything right now Bruce, he's my best friend. He feels like my own friend left. Sherlock's dead. Evie's done a Wormtail and Mycrofts retreated into himself, I don't blame him, his twin is gone and it's worse than anything that has ever happened but I-"

Irene was cut off by the blender, Bruce had pressed the button and Irene froze until Bruce released it. "I'm sorry Irene, but you were rambling."

"Thank you." Irene murmured, "Sherlock was the best at stopping my rambling."

Bruce nodded, "But Irene, he's not your only friend left. I'm here." He smiled before adding quickly, "All of us are."

Irene smiled and stepped closer to him leaning her shoulder into his chest. Bruce paused for a moment before wrapping his arms around her and pulling her around and closer.

She snuggled into his arms wrapping her own arms around him and took a deep breath trying to control her own emotions, she had been constantly up and down since the battle and worse since the funeral, she would just start crying at random moments and wouldn't be able to control it.

Bruce rubbed her back softly whispering soothing words into her ear telling her that it's okay to cry. And that was enough for her, her shoulders shook as she sobbed into his shoulder. He kept her closer and kissed her forehead running his fingers through her hair.

This lasted about ten minutes before Irene managed to get a hold on her emotions and stepped back wiping at her eyes, he handed her a handkerchief and she almost laughed at the cheesy moment but instead wiped at her eyes.

"Sorry about that." She muttered.

Bruce shrugged, "I don't mind. I want to be here for you." She held out the handkerchief to him and he shook his head "You need it more right now."

She smiled and put it in her pocket, "Thank you Bruce. You're too good to me."

He shrugged and Irene wanted to hug him again, feel his warm strong arms around her but she couldn't ask him.

He shrugged and Irene wanted to hug him again, feel his warm strong arms around her but she couldn't ask him it would be awkward.

"I just don't know how to help him."

"Let him grieve in his own way."

Irene hesitated, "I don't think his own way is...the best of ways to grieve."

Bruce's eyes narrowed, "What makes you say that?"

"When we were younger we found out some stuff about him that isn't really mine to tell. But this would be more than enough to start again."

Bruce rubbed at his eyes and took a deep breath trying to figure out the best way to answer, "I think the only thing you can do is keep an eye on him and wait until he's ready to talk."

Irene nodded and found the urge to lean into him again, this time she couldn't resist and put her head onto his shoulder. "Thank you Bruce." she murmured as he wrapped his strong arms around her again.

"Anything for you My'rene."

Irene's eyes widened at the slip up. Was it slip up? If not she wasn't going to complain at the nickname if that's what it is.

Bruce immediately realised what he had said but couldn't find it in him to correct himself. He looked down at her and saw her smiling softly showing him that she likes the name, he reached a hand touching her chin pushing her head upwards to look at him.

He knew this could easily be a really bad idea, one of his worst ideas but he couldn't find it within himself to stop.

His lips pressed her and she didn't react for a moment out of shock more than anything else before she kissed him back much to his relief.

He reached down grabbing her waist and picking her up and spinning around to place her on the counter, she wrapped her legs around his waist pulling him closer. Bruce put his hand down on the counter to balance himself but accidently knocked the blender, it fell off the side the liquid spilling out and the two pulled apart shocked at the noise, Bruce stepped back and then slipped on the liquid and slipped landing heavily with an 'OPHF'.

Irene gasped, "Are you okay?!" she yelled trying to jump off the counter carefully so as not to slip but as Bruce tried to stand up but as Irene bent down to help she slipped and landed across his stomach pushing him back on the ground.

They both laid there for a minute before Irene starting giggling making Bruce laugh until they were both laughing uncontrollably. Irene rolled off Bruce but lay in the liquid beside him as she laughed.

The door opened and Leo walked in, pausing, rose an eyebrow at them before closing the door again without question, only a small headshake though he didn't want to know, only causing the two to laugh even harder.

It took a while for them to calm down and even long to be able to look at each other without the giggles starting again but finally Bruce stood up; he held out a hand to help her and used his other hand to hold the counter and keep his own balance.

Irene went to get the mop whilst Bruce picked up the blender and Irene went to get the mop.

"We should go shower." Bruce said and Irene smirked.

"I think this is a bit soon." She couldn't resist saying and Bruce blushed and rolled his eyes.

"I'm sorry." he muttered and Irene rose an eyebrow nervously, she knew exactly what he was going to say.

"Why?" she had to ask.

"Because that was really selfish. I like you Irene. I really, really do, but I can hurt you and I don't want to."

"Anyone could hurt me." Irene pointed out.

"But I can't control it, if my heart rate goes up to high," he blushed as Irene realised what he was suggesting and smirked, "I Hulk out. Then I lose control and I could kill you, Irene."

"Bruce, you've got more control than you realise."

"Not really."

"Yes you do. I know you do. Bruce, I've never felt this way about anyone before. We can test the waters, stop anytime you need to." Irene didn't wait for his answer instead she kissed him again but he managed to push her back.

"Irene-"

"Bruce."

"Ire-"

"Bruce."

"I-"

She cut him off which a kiss and this time Bruce didn't resist.