{• Damned Deed •}
.•°.Chapter 35: Attempt at Perfection & Protection. °•.
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Minute moans escaped her parted lips often throughout their heated session. A rising aching need quickened in both of them. Gently, his thrusts were working to deepen that desire for a release. The one that was in reach, yet tauntingly far away at the same time.
Her arms were on the brink of giving out on her, allowing her to fall instead of keeping her propped up, just as her knees felt wanton. Her husband's hands upon her hips, though, kept that from being a problem. He held her up as he continued his powerful pounds into her moist center.
His breaths got shorter and quicker as he felt himself reaching his limit. There was no way he could hold back once she cried out his name before climaxing, milking him along to follow. Their bodies quickly found the comfort of their futon to collapse upon as they fell back down into reality and caught their breath.
A smile laced up Kagome's lips as she turned on her side to see her still flustered husband, "that was…"
He just nodded, he knew. At first, he honestly thought it odd to continue to have sex after she was pregnant and showing but… she still had needs, ones that got intensified at times during the pregnancy, and it was his job as her husband to satisfy her. It wasn't that he didn't find her attractive anymore. To him, she was beautiful, maybe even more so than before. It was just the notion of having sex as her womb swelled with their growing child that seemed odd to him…
But that was the important thing, their child was still growing. He had to hope that meant the poison didn't affect him. That when he was born he'd be completely healthy. Gods, he had no idea what he'd do if something were to happen this time around... he'd probably just die.
"I think she kicked," Kagome declared as she placed her hands on her stomach. Instantly, Inuyasha propped himself up on an arm to look over her.
"Really?" He questioned with a lifted brow, "Are you sure?"
"It was faint, but I think so," she answered as she took his hands to place them where she thought she felt the kick. Yet, after a while there was nothing. "Maybe it was nothing. It was faint."
"Oh," he muttered back. If there was kicking then he'd feel a whole lot better. Then their child would obviously have some sort of strength, be sort of alright at least. Hopefully… maybe.
"I love you," she whispered.
"I love you, too," he answered.
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It was exactly where she wasn't supposed to go… Especially when she was out of Inuyasha's sight but she wanted to stretch her legs and she did get ever so anxious when he was gone. Walking along just within the barrier made her feel closer to him each time he checked on the well. Sango and Miroku had their hands full with their children at the moment so neither even really noticed her slip away.
She was always so worried that he wouldn't come back… yet so hopeful at the same time that when he returned it would be with their son. Neither things ever happened. He had never returned with their baby - well, not really that anymore, it'd be their toddler - but at the same time he had always returned. She had no idea what she would have done if he didn't.
"Kagome!" Inuyasha called out to cause her to jump and turn to see him walk through the barrier and up to her. An annoyed look upon his face. He didn't have to say it, she already knew what was wrong. "You're out of my sight and you think it's a good idea to go on a walk, by yourself, and to top it off you were walking along the barrier? Fuck. What have I told you?"
"Inuyasha," she sighed, she even added a pout to try and appease him. It didn't work well, but it worked some. He did feel slightly better - slightly - at the sight of her pout but not enough that he wasn't going to chew her out for going towards the barrier. "I'm sorry."
"Don't you dare ever do it again," he ordered. His sunlit stare shifted up and down her to verify that she was in one piece and fine. For a moment, his eyes stopped on her enlarged stomach. That was the reason that he was so paranoid and why she needed to be more careful. Wasn't that obvious, did he really have to pound it into her head some more?
"You are treating me like a child, Inuyasha, and it's really starting to get on my nerves," Kagome stated rather harshly, "I'm so sick of it. Really, so sick."
"I don't want something to happen to you," he growled back, "that's the only reason I'm acting like this. And I'm not treating you like a child. It's just you keep doing stupid shit, like you aren't listening to a word I've said. You're safest inside the barrier. You're even safer inside my sight at all time. I just need you to be safe, Kagome."
She knew that… she did. It was just having him always nag about staying inside his line of sight and never leaving the barrier. Since they found out she was pregnant she hadn't really left the town. Before that, she never really explored his side of reality but now she had no chance of doing it… and suddenly the village seemed ever so small.
At the same time, she was certain that he was right. Her child and her were safest inside the barrier and within Inuyasha's line of sight but it did annoy her some. "I know you do it because you care, Inuyasha…"
"Keh, obviously," he grumbled back as he took her hand and began to lead her towards town again.
She was going to say something more, maybe mention how he could act less rigid about it, but a sudden bang caught her attention, causing her to jump some and grab him again as they looked to the barrier to see a small demon bounce against the barrier. His arms wrapped around her with narrowed eyes. "That fucker… I should -"
"Please, don't leave," Kagome requested stubbornly as she looked up to him pleadingly. How the hell could he ever say no to something like that? "It could be a trap, just stay here with me."
"That's true," he muttered and the youkai was deflected off of the barrier so it wasn't going to be a problem. Leaving Kagome alone when something like that happened was a terrible idea, so he just held her a bit tighter before kissing her upon the head. "Let's go home."
"I really like that idea," she softly replied.
Our home always seemed like the safest place in the world… but, I guess, bad things can happen in supposedly safe places still.
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He was always on edge, always trying to stop whatever problem might happen next, or something of the sort. The fact that he didn't seem to sleep often worried her but there wasn't any convincing him. It was impossible nowadays to get him to settle down. It had been getting so much worse the farther along in the pregnancy she got.
"Will you come here?" she asked with a heavy sigh as her hazels followed him around the house that afternoon. For some reason, he was checking everything in the house to make sure that it was sealed up tightly, that everything was alright. It was driving her a little crazy. "Come here."
"Why?" he questioned with a lifted brow as he gave her a quick side glance. "Kagome, I'm just-"
"Making me crazy," she muttered, "I demanded you come over here and a s-i-t next to me. Alright?"
"Oh? And why is that?" he inquired as her eyes narrowed upon him.
"We need to have bonding time with our child," she answered as she rubbed her stomach lightly. "Come here, please?"
His golden gaze went to the window, to see the sun was still high in the sky, before his eyes shifted back to Kagome. With a sigh he walked over to sit down next to her, he supposed that was a good idea. It was just he had been reluctant to do that… he knew it was wrong, but he didn't want to get attached to something he might never have. A smile almost slipped up his lips at the thought.
The first time around, when they were having their son, Kagome had been the one reluctant to form an attachment. The one who was certain it was pointless since they'd never get to have him… but he had insisted on it, he had thought they'd be able to actually have their son, and it failed. This time, it was Kagome that was forcing him to sit down and have bounding time with their child. It was weird how things could turn around like that.
"I love you," she whispered.
For some reason, she had been saying that a lot. Which meant, he was saying it a lot as well. He always replied, "I love you, too."
"Bonding time means you can't think of anything but her or me, no worrying, Inuyasha," Kagome stated.
"Him," he countered, "and I'm not worrying about anything, Kagome."
"You could have had me fooled with the way you were wandering the house just now checking to make sure everything was locked. Why were you doing that anyway?"
"I just wanted to make sure everything was safe for tonight, that's all."
"Why would tonight be any different than any other night?" she asked with a small tilt of her head.
To that he just shrugged as she placed a hand on his head to lower it down to her stomach. He didn't understand what she was getting at in the least until she said, "your hearing is so much better than mine. Can you… hear her heartbeat?"
That was a good question so he placed his ear against her bulging belly to try and hear something. It only took a short while for him to hone in on that sound. The pitter patter of a heartbeat. A healthy one, he thought, but he couldn't be sure. He didn't know how a baby's heartbeat should have sounded like anyway.
"Yeah, I can," he answered with a smile.
"See? Everything's going to be alright," she stated with her own smile. It was a real relief hearing that. If there was a heartbeat and she was growing, surely everything was going to be fine. It just had to be…
"It better," he muttered so low he was sure she couldn't hear him. Because… if everything turned out not to be alright he couldn't take it. He just didn't have any idea of realizing at the time that he had no idea what was to come, and how the perfect picture of what was to be would never become reality.
Or… how it would be all his wife's fault. Even in all his wildest dreams he wouldn't have thought she'd take something so important away from him. That he'd crush all the possibilities in their future… and without even consulting him first. But for the time being, he could live in blissful ignorance of what the future would hold for him.
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Morality was the problem they faced. The thing that kept him awake at night with worry. His wife was just a mortal… she could get killed easily and their child could also as long as he was in her. Which he would be for quite some time still. That was why he had to make sure the house was completely safe for that night.
When the sun finally set that night it gave way to one of the things he hated most - a sky without a moon. Ever since Kagome became pregnant he feared the new moons more than ever before. What if something attacked? What if something happened? He couldn't protect her. He was useless mortal.
It was apparent to him that she had forgotten what night it was going to be since she gasped with surprise when she was doing the dishes only to turn around to see her husband look completely different than when she started her chore. But then realization dawned on her, she should have figured that out. He had been acting strange all day, and he always did before a night of the new moon.
"I love you like this," she assured him softly once she convinced him to lie down on the futon with her to keep her warm that night. He didn't see what it mattered, even if he was sitting up with his sword it wouldn't do them any good. He wouldn't notice anything until it was too late and his sword didn't transform for him when he was mortal.
It was a lose-lose situation.
"Yeah, I know," he muttered back. She loved him no matter what, he got that, but it didn't make him feel any better on nights like that. Particularly when his wife was pregnant and in need of protection.
"Do you really hate being mortal just one night a month so much?" she asked as she glanced over to see the expression on his face. At first there was nothing, he had just been staring at the ceiling, but then he turned his temporarily auburn gaze to her.
"When I was a kid I looked forward to it, I loved it even," he started cautiously before letting out a sigh and turning his gaze back to the ceiling. "Those nights my mother never got cursed at… neither did I. We moved around a lot when I was a kid, it was hard for us to stay in one village for too long. So sometimes no one would know that I was a hanyou yet and think I was just a normal kid. My mom… would smile a lot more on nights like those. I didn't get to see her smile often. Most of the time she was sad, crying…"
"Oh, Inuyasha," Kagome whispered. She reached out to take one of his hands into hers and squeeze it before placing it on her stomach. "We'll both be here for this child, regardless of any problems, and make sure that she never feels like she'd not good enough."
"I hope," he mumbled softly, "that he resembles you more than me. It'd be easier if he looked mostly human."
"I love your features, all of them," she promised him with a smile. One that got an ever so weak one in return, but still a smile. On the night of the new moon, she rarely ever saw him smile. That brought her almost as much joy as the feeling of a kick.
Quickly, Inuyasha propped himself up on his elbow as she laughed lightly. "Was that?"
"Yeah," she stated with a nod, "she definitely just kicked."
The smile on her face… the glow of bliss she seemed to have even in the worst of times. It all made him wonder one thing, "do you like being pregnant? I mean, it is a pain sometimes and isn't always pleasant." She complained often about all the horrors of pregnancy, after all. "But are you happy regardless?"
"I don't not like it," was the best answer she could give. She wouldn't have wanted to be pregnant all of the time but it was a suffering that would bring them great joy. And it would. It had to. This time around they'd get to have their child. She was just sure of it.
"That's not a real answer," he grumbled back.
"Fine, then I have a question for you, what if we conceived our child on the night of the new moon?" it was a possibility, they had sex all the time on night's the new moon. It was something that could happen and there was a new moon near around the time that she got pregnant. "Would our child be fully human?"
That seemed to baffle him for a moment as his gaze shifted around her. Then he shrugged a shoulder, "I don't know. Maybe. I am human on those nights so… probably, I guess. Why…?"
Was that what she wanted? Their child to be fully human? He knew if it was, it'd have an easier life but… no, he also knew Kagome wouldn't care about such things. She'd love their kid no matter what it was.
"Just wondering," she mused while she closed her eyes. "I'm going to sleep, so should you."
He wanted to laugh at the very idea. On nights of the new moon he never slept. She should have known better than to even suggest the idea.
A/N: Thank you for your reviews, I appreciate them all - long or short. Sorry it took me so long to update this I just... had writer's block. I still have it for Toyfriend so I don't know when I'll be updating that. Hopefully soon.
Please review continue to review :)