Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Sai called me insisting that we go out today. I wondered how he finds the energy to party all night and then go out early in the morning, at the time. I didn't have a class for the next two hours so I told him no problem as long as we don't go anywhere too far from the campus.

So we went together to a small coffee shop near by. I really like that place, and how it always smells like fresh brewed coffee. He came on time but looked half asleep. I guess he didn't have superhuman energy; he looked like he just wanted to see that I was okay in person. How can I put my feelings about this into words? Bewilderment but content. Still had a lot of doubts. You see, I couldn't wrap my mind about how concerned he was about me. It is normal when Itachi does it, but he was (and is) still relatively a stranger to me. It made me contend, but I wondered if he had an agenda. I knew he doesn't like me more than a friend (he admitted to having feelings for the straight Kiba after a few drinks last time). I was being paranoid. I was and still not used to having friends I guess.

Anyway, he kept eye fucking with a guy across the room until we came upon the topic of his crush on Kiba.

"Do you like Inuzuka?"

"Me?" He smiled. "What makes you think so?"

"You said it yourself after that pink drink and the purple one."

"Ah, I can never hide it. Can I? I like him, but he is so straight. That's the recipe for a heart break right there so I'm trying not to get too attached. But he has a beautiful penis. Just cut and beautiful," he smiles.

"It's all about sex with him?"

"Nah. Sex is important, don't get me wrong. So important. But we've been friends for a couple of years and I know who he is."

"He seems a little homophobic. Maybe he's gay."

"No he is straight. And not homophobic. He was okay with my sexuality until the..." He popped his finger against the corner of his mouth.

"I thought he enjoyed it."

"Lots of straight guys enjoy it when another guy sucks them off. Sasuke, sexuality is not black and white. Most people think it is, but its not."

"He is at least bi."

"I slept with a girl before and enjoyed it. And I'm not bi."

"You slept with a girl?" I could help hide my shock. He is just so... Gay! Ah, now I'm stereotyping.

"What can I say? It was my first time and it was tight and warm and wet."

"I can't hear anymore of this."

"But sex with straight guys is sort of sexy in someway. Something about."

"I still think if they are having sex with you, they're not straight."

He sighed, "I regardless of whatever label you put on Kiba, end point is he is not ready or willing to be with a guy. I've done the "maybe I'll change his mind" wishing game before and it didn't work out. That's why I decided I will only want someone who wants me back," and then he pointed to the guy across the room. "And that's also why I'm going to skip the micro economics class for a glass in MAJOR anatomy with that cute guy eyeing me."

"And Kiba?"

"He is a nice fantasy. Fantasy is the keyword. Now if you'll excuse me, I don't want to be late for class," he got up, winked, and went to the bathroom. One minute later, I saw the other guy sneaking in there too.

I figured I shouldn't be late for class either (even though I was betting my class wouldn't be as much fun as his especially with Professor Browns wool sweater that smells like moth balls). I got up and began walking, passing by the homeless man again. I only smiled at him. I didn't want to, but my face acted on its own. He waved, and then I kept on walking.

On my way back home, I was walking around contemplating the girls fashion on campus (which is wearing nothing) after seeing one girl shamelessly flirt with a professor for a grade bump up, when I passed by the homeless man again. This time I walked over, "do you sleep here?"

"Well, if it gets too hot I go to my beach house," he pointed to a carton next to a puddle. Good to know he still had a sense of humor. "You are probably not interested in my name, but I'm Asuma."

"Nice to meet you," I tossed him an apple I kept in my bag back. "I confronted Naruto."

"And?"

"He changed the topic."

"I see. I would've expected that more than expecting you to confront him in the first place."

"What do you think I should do?"

"I'd say find someone who loves you, but you wouldn't follow that advice."

"I like your therapy more than my therapist's. He's always telling me to figure it out myself."

"That's because this isn't therapy."

"Maybe I should talk to a bartender. They are good listeners."

"If the only one you have to listen to you is a bar tender then you have more problems than you think."

"Thankfully, I'm not a drunk...yet."

"Don't be unless you are into wasting fortunes and beach side houses," he pointed at the carton again.

"You drank?"

"Too much for my good."

"Is that how you lost your boyfriend?"

"I lost him for many reasons. More than I could count but all of them were my fault. It is good he got out though. Dumped me before I could drag him down with me."

"What happened?"

"Like I said. I was spoiled so I drank and gambled. End up cheating and loosing most of my money. Then loosing money I don't have," he appointed at his leg and I noticed a walking stick. "Got my leg broken, and that's when he started paying for my debts out of his pocket so I won't get my neck broken the next time. By the time he left he finally had taken a second mortgaged on his house."

"You can still change."

"Perhaps. I can start over, but have you seen me? I smell of cat piss."

"You noticed that?"

"It doesn't bother me anymore."

"I might be able to get you an interview, a suit, and a clean room to shower."

He looked up at me, "I don't think government work would suit me." He joked.

"Nah. I know someone who takes interest in cases like this."

"That blond boyfriend of yours?"

"Leave it to me."

As I was leaving, I saw Kevin walking on the opposite street. He didn't see me back and we didn't interact, but it reminded me of him. I hate the fact that everything around me now is routing against Naruto.