Rain, Forgive Me

Chapter Thirty-Six: Whispers of the lonely dead

There was a blackness in the consuming light. A hatred in the sea of love. An utter despair in the skies of hope. Why was there this little black hole that ate at their hearts? The black hole was there from the beginning… waiting to grow. That way it could destroy everything they had… but they only had each other. That's all they had.

And now the black hole was taking it away inch by inch. The two of them thought, no believed, they had a solution for the problem. The solution was to destroy the other. That's just what the black hole wanted to happen. It ate at them desperately telling each other the lies of hate. When there was so much love to still be had.

Tears couldn't be enough to express the grief inside their hearts, a wild entanglement they couldn't escape. But their hearts were twined together even through all of this, even though they hated each other, even though killing was their intent. There would always be the two of them together, because that was all they ever had.

Riina ran at the monster with fury. And the monster ran back with the same amount of hate. The red head swung her left arm forward. It swung deeply at the monster behind the white bones. The bones then cracked and shattered to a million pieces. Riina was left with half of a sword, because the metal had broken off.

She had gotten through the bones! Somehow, she had enough energy to do it! Now, no longer surrounded by the white light was Akahana. A woman stood before her, taller by several inches. Her eyes were wide. The Riina saw something odd in them.

A little and frightened girl. One with gorgeous silver hair and gleaming red eyes. They were not evil eyes, they brought only comfort to all those who looked her way. The girl though was crying in fear. Riina saw the girl quiver away and Riina felt the sword become heavy in her left hand.

She was only a few inches away from the monster who was now unprotected. Her left arm was thrusting forward from momentum right at the woman's throat. But In those little seconds of fight that was still left in her, the red head had noticed those eyes.

Those eyes that she knew all too well. She had loved the person who owned those eyes, the girl. She had loved Akahana. And now that her sword was hurling at the girl's neck… she felt the sword grow heavier by the second.

Flash backs came. This time they were only of Akahana, the bright smile she had. The times when she had shed a few lonely tears, the times she had run along with a joy in her heart. In the flash backs that were grey and hazy in her mind, Akahana was not evil. She was a little girl. She was her little sister.

Riina furrowed her brow deeply and she felt water fog her vision. She was so close to killing the monster, why was she having second thoughts? 'No, I hate you. I hate what you've become! You're nothing but a hallow that I have to destroy!' Riina confirmed in her mind.

'You'll never be the Akahana I once knew! You're nothing compared to her! You're evil, pure evil! I need to kill you… no I want to kill you! I'll slice you up till you bleed out! Then we'll see how cocky you feel then! You disgust me, you're not my sister. My sister had love for me… and you, you just hate me. I'll show you, I'll kill you for the second time!' Riina's eyes widened. Her arm stopped in mid air. The sharp crisp but broken blade was only a hair from Akahana's throat.

Riina looked into her eyes.

["You know that you're the only family I need." Riina smiled and patted the shorter girl's head. "No, what I'm bothered by is the fact that we can't play with the other kids. I mean… it makes me feel bad. Neither of us have any friends…"

Akahana hugged Riina around the waist. "I don't need any friends besides you."

Riina smiled, "Hey, I don't count and you know it. We're sisters so we can't be friends."

Akahana stood up off of the wooden bench that they were sitting on. "Wrong, we can be friends and sisters!"]

Red orbs glared back at her.

[ "Alright, so what should we do tomorrow?" Riina asked and led the way into the open shack.

"Well.." Akahana placed her hand over her mouth in thought. "How bout we splurge our money, we'll go out and buy a toy!"

"Akahana, we only have three dollars left." Riina said and sat down on the mattress in the old room. They shared the mattress. Akahana sat beside her.

"Don't worry, I'll get us more money." She said.

Riina frowned. "No, I'll go work for the money this time. I'm older, I should be the one who gets the money!" Riina felt embarrassed that her younger sister was always the one providing for the both of them.

"Riina, it'll be okay. I can do it." She smiled. Then she hugged Riina. "You take care of me in all the other ways. It's only fair if I pay for a toy."]

Riina could feel her warm breath fall from her lips.

[Riina smiled. Akahana, she was so joyous, it made Riina almost forget about the fact they lived in a crumby old shack.

"Oh, did you feel that?" Akahana placed her hand in the air.

Riina did the same. "No, was it a drop?"

"Yup." Akahana smiled as she looked up at the grey sky.

The rain gave a few more drops, one landed on Riina's hand. Then another on her head. Finally the rain began to pour down.

….It was comforting….]

The red head frowned deeper still.

["Come on Riina!" Akahana laughed and grabbed her older sister's hand.

"Akahana, I told you I can't run that fast! Slow down!" Riina said but it was too late. Riina fell down into the dirt. They were on their way to the market that morning but this morning wasn't very sunny. Which the girls actually liked better.

Riina growled while she was on the ground. "Akahana!"

Akahana bent down next to her, "…sorry."]

So many memories rushed in her head.

[Riina clenched her teeth. "I said shut up!" She turned around and pushed the shorter girl to the ground. "You always act like you're so much better than me! Has it ever come to your mind that maybe I wanted to be the older sister for once?" Riina growled. Her voice echoed off the trees and resounded in the barren forest of death.

Akahana now on the ground was upset. Her eyes flooded with water. "Riina just calm down already!" She said half angry and half sad. "If you want to make the money and lead the way then go ahead I said! I don't care I just wanted to take care of you!"]

Riina clenched her jaw shut tightly.

["Riina…. Please just calm down." Akahana said.

"No!" Riina yelled. "Stop telling me what to do! Didn't you hear me? I hate you, nobody likes you or me! We could go die in a hole and no one would care!" Riina quivered a bit and let go of her t-shirt.

Akahana had more tears. "Riina!" She yelled back huffing for air as she sobbed, "Stop it! Stop it! You have no idea what I go through to make sure you're safe! Why aren't you ever grateful for that? I'm sorry we don't have a better life but I tried so hard…" Akahana closed her eyes and said through her teeth, "I tried so hard to make sure you were happy!"

Riina grabbed Akahana, this time by the arms, "You're not my mother, I don't need you taking care of me. You stupid low life of a girl! You failed okay? I'm not happy! I hate you and everything you've done for me! Don't ever talk to me again! Get outta here! I never want to see you!" Riina threw the smaller girl back. But Akahana landed on her feet this time.

Riina stormed off in the other direction, her arms at her sides. Blood rushing through her veins. She felt tears fall freely. But they weren't just tears of sadness, they were tears of anguish. She felt so many horrible emotions at once she didn't know what to do. She wished she could just go beat up everyone in the world. Take her anger out on them.

As Riina's footsteps grew longer, so did her anger spread. She was so blinded by rage… she'd do anything to get it out of her.

"Riina… wait!" Akahana came crying behind her.

Riina grabbed Akahana with a vicious grasp, "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Riina said with pure rage. She swung the girl to her left, into the raging river. Akahana tripped on the mud slide and fell straight into the river. A loud splash came from her falling in.

"I HOPE YOU DROWN IN THERE! I HOPE YOU DIE!" Riina screamed as loud as she could. Her lungs stung in pain. "I hope you die!" She yelled again and then ran into the forest. She was going to leave her there. Leave her in the tossing currents to drown.]

Those sad and crying eyes, they desperately pleaded with her. Riina saw them almost every night when she went to bed and now, subtly, they were there yet again. This time for real. Deep inside of Akahana's eyes, Riina could feel the pleading. Her heart ached now… so very much.

Everything she regretted went back to that day, what she did to her little sister. It didn't matter that they were not truly related, it only mattered that they were there for each other. And Riina, she broke it all. She threw what they had away.

She wondered how she could have done that. It was so wrong and merciless. She caused her sister to grow up and become a hollow. What kind of older sister was she? She was an awful one, the worst.

And now that she had the chance to look into those eyes, she was going to destroy it? That would be her biggest regret. If she had killed her sister a second time, what kind of older sibling would she be then?

Riina closed her eyes and a sad smiled crept to her lips. She quivered she dropped the sword. It clanked to the ground. The metal sound rang through her ears. It was a sound like no other, when it was joined with tears from the face of the red headed girl.

Clear salty tears fell freely from her closed eyes but her weak smile strengthened through her tears. Even though the swept over her chin and dripped to the ground her smile still lasted. She peeked open her eye just a bit to see a shocked face.

Akahana stood there with a frown on her face. Her sharp teeth showing in her mouth were distinguished beyond the rest. Blood drops were on her face from previous injuries. Her eyes widened at the sight before her.

Riina shook her head lightly. "I-I" Her voice crumbled. She felt a sob choke out from her throat and tears rushed by a little faster. "I can't… kill you." She spoke then wiped away her tears. Her smile stayed up.

Akahana shook her head then smiled. "You should have killed me, I knew you were too weak to do it. That's alright, I'll do the honors." Akahana bent down and grabbed the metal from the sandy ground. "You'll die by your own blade without a fight? How foolish Riina, I thought you'd be smarter than this." There was a little bit of a pause. "Ah well, if you don't want to defend yourself, you're such a waste."

Riina saw the woman take half a step back and white spiritual flamed around her hand. She drew back the jagged sword. The red head only saw the flash backs of the little girl in pain and the little girl with a smile on her face. She couldn't hurt that girl, never again. Even if it meant… this.

All those years of regret could finally go away, she wouldn't hurt this being anymore. She'd finally be guilt free.

"Akahana, you will always be…" Riina began to whisper as she closed her eyes and waited for the pain. "My little sister."

Then a pain in her chest. Silence... She didn't feel the pain anymore, it slowly was swept away. Her hands and her legs felt cold. She peaked open her eyes for one last time. Before her was a blurry image. Akahana kneeling over her.

Somehow Riina's body had fallen to the ground though she didn't remember falling. There wasn't a sword in her hand or an evil grin on her face. There was a different and unknown expression there. Everything was getting so dark… Riina could see a sword sticking out from her back through to her chest. A different sword, one that hadn't belonged to Akahana.

Looking up to the sky Riina saw someone who was tall. A man with dark hair and a frown on his face. He was so tall, he was an espada by the number 5 on his tongue. He pulled the sword up through her chest out of the metal plate with ease. It slid clean through her though she felt no pain from it.

Akahana, her expression was different. Slowly tears fell from her eyes and landed on Riina's cheeks. Her face was so sad. Akahana screamed her name but Riina couldn't hear a thing. It was getting so dark. The last thing she did happen to see were those beautiful red eyes widen in shock as a blade went through her chest.

The woman's eyes hazed a little. Her body slumped forward closer to Riina's. Tears still fell from her face. Coldness cold barely be felt from the tears on Riina's skin. Akahana was moving her lips but no word came out that Riina could hear.

She did see the woman slowly kiss her forehead though and there was a subtle warmth to it that made Riina hear just a little bit longer. Her vision had gone, everything was black by now but Riina felt the little warmth on her forehead and the whisper of the woman over her.

The whisper was barely audible and that of a dying woman who choked out every syllable. Riina felt her consciousness drift a little more away from her grasp with each word she said until there was nothing left but her soothing voice. "And you... will always be… my older sister."