The muses of ice and of fire
Are attendant on Stephenie Meyer
We disclaim to infringe on her talents and rights
We only intend to admire.
Edward was too furious to speak to Bella. His rage felt like a block of ice sitting on his chest, choking his nonexistent breath. Ignoring the vibrating of his phone, he drove recklessly fast away from the beach and towards the hotel.
"You knew he was there," Bella said flatly.
Edward didn't answer. He had known that Jacob was close, had heard the Dogman's thoughts the second he spied Edward and Bella from atop the cliffs.
"You touched me like that…to drive him crazy. Mature, Edward."
He shot her a glare. "No more so than your decision to 'intervene' between two vicious monsters."
"Well, considering the recent revelation that I'm your mate, I figured it would have the desired effect."
Edward pulled the wheel sharply to the right and the Volvo skidded out onto the shoulder, spraying sand and rocks and mud. Bella shrieked and clutched the dashboard. Edward's fury carried him out of the car and he wrenched her door open, pulling her out by her elbow.
"Don't ever," he said as calmly as he could, "Threaten to put yourself in danger again, Bella. Ever."
She had the good sense to look frightened. Instead of pacifying him, though, the alarm in her eyes only made Edward more furious. At himself.
Calm down, Edward, a small voice in his head whispered. Remember how fragile she is.
"If anything happened to you, Jacob would not live to make it to your funeral," he said in an even voice. "So any ill-advised attempts to get between him and me in a fight would not have the effect of keeping him safe. Got it?"
"And what about keeping you safe? Maybe the next time you two get into it, you'll lose a head instead of an arm."
Edward turned to a nearby tree stump and kicked it. Wood chips and rocks exploded outward, flying into the forest and putting a good-sized dent in the car door.
After a moment's shocked silence, Bella spoke again. "Since when am I your mate, Edward?"
His rage cooled abruptly. It wasn't gone, not by a long shot, but at least he could turn to her and look her in the eye without screaming at her.
"Since the moment I first saw you," he said quietly. "Since the moment you were born. Since the moment I was born. Who knows? It doesn't matter. You're mine, Bella."
She searched his face. Apparently she found confirmation there of what he claimed, because she swallowed and asked, "And how long have you known this? Or suspected?"
"Suspected? Since you stepped into the store. But the first time I was sure was when my family told me so. They've known all along."
She was breathing rapidly. "So, do I have any say in this? Or shall I just hand over the rights to my body and soul right here and now?"
"It would definitely make things easier," Edward snarled at her. "But of course you have a choice."
He spun around and started pacing. "Unfortunately, if I ever see or hear of anyone else putting a hand on you ever again, that man is dead. So I'm afraid your options are rather limited."
"Oh, that's such a relief." Bella threw up her hands. "So much for free will."
"I'm not joking, Bella."
"Neither am I." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. "When were you planning on telling me this, then?"
"Not like this." He laughed humorlessly. "Believe me. Usually a man aims for wine, roses and romantic music when he tells a woman that he loves her. Not a screaming fight by the side of the road. Congratulations, Bella, once again you've turned me into a complete Neanderthal."
"Love?" she asked softly.
Edward turned to her.
"Of course, love," he answered. Confused at her confusion.
She gazed at him silently.
"Don't you remember what I told you? Vampires mate for life, Bella. It's complete, and it's irreversible. You are it for me. There will never be anyone else."
"Like Esme and Carlisle," she whispered.
"And Rose and Emmett. And Alice and Jasper." He saw the direction her thoughts were taking and rushed to head them off. "It's not always a tragedy, Bella. I know mated pairs who have been together for a thousand years."
"So, you want to…make me into a vampire."
Shit. He should have seen that one coming.
"I…haven't decided yet," he hedged.
"So what's the alternative? I grow old and we do a Harold and Maude for a while, and then I die? That doesn't sound like much fun. For either of us."
"It would be," Edward fumbled. "It would be, because we would be together."
"For a while. And then what?"
"Then…I don't know."
"Bullshit, Edward. You're saying that you would rather let me die than spend eternity with me?"
"No, it's not like that." Damn it, I should have thought this through. "I would rather let you die a natural death than doom you to an eternity of darkness and damnation. Of carnage and blood. How much could I love you if I was willing to subject you to that without some serious thought?"
"Had you considered asking me what I want?"
"Of course." Oh, God, Rose is so going to kill me. "I just…I was waiting for the right moment."
His lame excuse fell flat, even to his own ears. He stood uncertainly, watching her watch him, watching the wheels turn in her head.
"Can you take me home?" she said finally. "I need to think this over, Edward."
"Okay," he said tentatively. "Can I…come see you tonight?"
She looked down. "I'm not sure yet."
Pain arced through him, but he nodded and opened her door for her. They drove back to Charlie's house in silence.
"What's up, Bells?"
Bella slammed another cupboard door and gave her father a swift look. "Nothing."
"Uh-huh. You and Edward had a fight, didn't you?"
"Maybe."
"I'm sorry, baby. Do you want to talk about it?"
She slid her father an incredulous look as she handed him his plate. "Do you want to hear about it?"
"Not even remotely. But for you, I'll listen."
Tears prickled at her eyelids. "Thank you for saying that."
"So do I need to go kick his ass? This I can do."
You think so, do you? Bella thought, but shook her head. "No, no."
"I got a call from Billy Black," Charlie said gently. "He said that Jacob had a rough day."
"Yeah." Rolling her eyes, Bella sat down across from him. "My best friend and my boyfriend got in a tug-of-war over me. I had to threaten to physically pull them apart. And then I got yelled at. It was great."
"Who yelled? Edward or Jacob?"
"Edward. He was upset that I would get between them and get myself hurt."
"He's right."
"Oh, thanks for the support."
"Bella, I would much rather see Jacob and Edward in the hospital than you. And if you ever got between two angry guys whaling on each other, I would be pretty pissed at you. Just sayin'."
"I know." Bella picked at her trout. "I don't think I really would have done it. I was just trying to get them away from each other."
Charlie sighed and took a sip of iced tea. "Rule one? Never bluff. If you're going to make threats, you'd better be willing to back them up."
"So what am I supposed to do?" Bella put down her fork and gazed at her father. "Let them beat each other to a bloody pulp? I'm sorry, but I'd really rather not witness the two men I care about most in the world – besides you, of course – tear each other apart."
"I doubt it would come to that, Bella. Jake's strong, but he's got a level head on his shoulders. A few black eyes never killed anyone."
Bella snorted. "When it comes to Edward, Jacob is not level. He is beyond unlevel. He is Jack Nicholson in The Shining."
"Well, I guess it's a big disappointment. He's been waiting for you for a long time, Bells."
Bella glared at him. "And I have been nothing but straight with him."
"I know, I know." Charlie took a deep breath. "It hurt a lot, when your mother married Phil. Even though I knew we were over and had been for fifteen years, it was hard for me. I think I understand a little of what Jacob is going through, Bella."
Bella swiped angrily at her tears. "Damn it."
Her father reached out and covered her hand with his. "It'll pass, baby."
When Bella went upstairs, she glanced at the bedroom window and sighed. Grumbling to herself, she opened the window just a little before going into the bathroom to shower and get ready for bed. Edward was sitting at her desk when she returned.
"Are you still mad at me?" she asked him.
Edward shook his head. "Are you still mad at me?"
"No."
His eyes flickered, and his shoulders relaxed. He watched her silently as she put her bath things away and climbed into bed.
"Will you just stay here?" she asked quietly into the dark. "Just…don't go."
"I'll never go."
Dear Carlisle,
I've fucked everything up. I suppose I knew I would, from the beginning. I've tried so hard to be perfect for her. The perfect man, the perfect protector, the perfect lover. But instead I'm utterly at a loss. I don't know what to do.
She didn't say the words.
There was a strange, uneasy truce between Bella and Edward. She didn't bring up their conversation on the side of the road, and neither did he. She didn't speak of Jacob, so neither did he.
For three days, he kept his distance from her. He watched her sleep every night and spent his days by her side, but he didn't dare touch her.
If he did, he was likely to tell her all the things she didn't want to hear. That she was his mate. That she belonged to him. That he'd tear out Jacob Black's heart and eat it whole before he'd let her touch him.
That he was dying inside, and only she could fix him.
It was hell on earth, the goddamn politeness between them. He would have preferred it if she screamed at him.
Edward arrived at the Swan residence at four on Wednesday afternoon. Bella was in the kitchen, cooking.
"What are you making?" he asked her, sliding into one of the kitchen chairs.
"Lasagna," she said. "It's one of Charlie's favorites." She looked up at him from the mushrooms she was chopping and smiled tightly. "Any luck today?"
"Not yet. We searched the area for the dozenth time, found nothing. Emmett caught a bear. It made his day."
Bella laughed. "I can just picture it."
They chatted for a while. Edward offered to help her, and she directed him to start slicing tomatoes for the green salad she planned to serve later.
"So, I was thinking -" she began, but the sound of a car backfiring outside in the street made her jump.
Edward saw the sharp blade that she was wielding slice into her flesh. Heard her quick intake of breath. Heard her nerves cry out in alarm and reaction to the sharp sting of steel.
And then the smell of her blood hit him. Annihilated him.
"Shit," she muttered, instinctively pinching her sliced thumb and sticking the wounded digit into her mouth. "Damn, that hurts."
Edward's throat was burning. A flame of hungry, parched need burst to life inside him. Before he knew what was happening, he was upon her.
"Can you get me a…a…" Bella looked up from her inspection of the cut, and her words trailed away. Her eyes went wide and her heart tripped into overtime when she saw his face.
Saw him for the killer that he was.
Chapter End Notes:
In other news, I have finally caved to peer pressure and joined Twitter. Yes, I am a Twit. There were several people who were on me about this a while ago, but I can't remember who you are. If you're reading, congratulations, you've turned me into one of the sheep. Or stupid lambs, rather. CyraBear