A/N: I went back and read through the entire fic the day before and realized that there was a disturbing lack of what Axel was going through when they were sorting out the fact that they had feelings for each other. I thought now would be a great time to revisit some of those moments, making the chapter a bit fluffy and well, off the main track, sort of. lol. I'm still not telling you guys who Axel is talking to but there are/will be plenty of hints. Also, the "memories" Axel is having isn't word for word what he is telling his "dream friend". I also enjoyed writing this side of Axel as he struggled to figure out his "feelings" towards Zexion. It was like this thing that just popped up on him and was like "hey! guess what? you like Zexion!" before giggling hysterically. Anyways, I do hope you guys enjoy this ultra-fluffy chapter of Axelness. :)

35

"Soo..." The evening air drifted around them. And the clock behind them ticked between the silence. "When did you know you liked him?"

Axel choked on air. It was a bold question, one that he did not know if he could think of an answer right away. The other giggled. "Seriously?" His face turned warm. Surly his cheeks were a nice shade of pink by now. "You know guys don't talk about their feelings." Leaning his head to the side he looked the aqua blue right in the eyes and smiled.

His friend laughed. "And you're one who was always ready to give relationship advice when asked."

"Yeah well," Axel shrugged.

"You must really like him then."

All that he could do was stare at his hands. Which felt a bit too warm inside his gloves as the wavering sunlight still put off heat. Axel nodded. He tried not to remember the confession that might not ever be heard by the one who it was for. "I should've told him."

"You'll find him, I know you will." Axel wanted to believe it. After all, this might just be a complete dream that his mind made up to begin with. "Until then, talk to me about it. It'll help us both."

Axel chuckled. "Now who's the relationship adviser?"

He tried to look away, he really did. But Axel could not help it. Sure, Zexion was not giving him the look of death anymore. It was just so damn hard to put things all together since he had touched Retribution. Nothing made sense anymore. The damn book was just as much of a smart ass as its owner. He wanted to be friends with him, well, they were now right? They certainly got close enough to be comfortable. Not like it was with Roxas though. There was an air of maturity between them. Well, as much as there could when you had Axel around. Sometimes, they would spend time together in the common area and read, much to Zexion's surprise Axel had a vast knowledge of different types of literature, and then there was a few times where Roxas and Demyx joined them in some sort of random shenanigans. Movies became a thing that they all could enjoy without much conflict.

Then there was the night where Zexion would not let him leave. A nightmare, he had a nightmare. It must have been extremely bad if he did not want to be left alone. But the way Zexion pulled him down to the bed confused Axel. When he was dragged close enough to burry his face into the soft indigo hair, he tried to breathe normally. His lungs filled with the scent of crushed mint from the shampoo he had used that day. The younger Nobody's body was tone from daily activity and felt strong despite the small frame. Axel wrapped his arms around Zexion protectively and almost nuzzled his face against the back of the other Nobody's neck. His fingers had already made their way to link their hands together. It seemed all too like an intimate limbo between the two of them, but perhaps Axel did not really care.

Zexion was shivering slightly and curled up against the warmth Axel put off. And he was all too happy to oblige. Nightmares were something he knew all too well. As Lea, he had many that would cause him to cry out in his sleep. Even if he never remembered one of them in his entire life, Axel knew how it felt to wake up after one. So he held onto his friend. Letting the heat from his breath trickle over the nape of Zexion's neck; the tiny hairs flared up and tickled the edge of his nose but Axel dared to not move. Eventually the shaking turned into a long sigh and the body went limp in his arms. The rise and fall of the younger Nobody's chest slowed signalling that Zexion had finally fell back to sleep. Satisfied that whatever haunted his friend's sleeping mind was washed from memory, Axel closed his tired eyes and drifted off with his arms still firmly enclosed around Zexion. Just as sleep over took him, he thought that maybe he was dreaming too. And for some strange reason that Axel could not place he wished the dream would not end.

All he could think about was touching him. Even if it was brief, a small brush of the arm or a pat on the back. If only he could run his hands across the porcelain skin once. Axel swallowed the lump in his throat as he looked over at Zexion as the schemer read one of his latest books. The schemer smiled gently. Biting his lip, he thought about how it would feel to push aside those annoying bangs and look into the deep sapphire without interference. They were beyond nostalgic, gems that rivaled the ocean blue. Then the lips were moving to form words he should be paying attention to.

"W-what?" He stuttered, blinking and hoping Zexion did not notice too much.

"I was asking what's with that look on your face."

"Just thinking!" He might be speaking a little too enthusiastically.

Zexion rolled his eyes. "Well, don't think too hard. You might hurt yourself."

Axel scowled in response. But when Zexion smiled behind the book, he could not help but wonder how those lips would feel. Perhaps he should lean forward, push the equally offensive book out of the way and find out. If he was not wearing gloves, maybe he could touch the flesh that looked like velvet before placing his own lips there. To hopefully see eyes full of surprise, feel the warmth of a heating face and close his eyes as the other pressed back in response. And the hair, it had been so soft that one night he had begun to wonder how it would feel laced between his naked fingers.

He wondered how smooth the perfect skin actually was and if it tasted slightly salty when he moved to lick the sensitive skin beneath the other's jaw line. Could he entice the schemer into pushing against him and dig his fingers into his shoulders for support as he lowered them down into the couch? Axel wanted to know how deep Zexion would moan as they unzipped their cloaks and he let his hot breath puff over an exposed chest. Should he move slowly to savor or with a passionate haste?

Was Zexion's hair really that indigo naturally? He personally had many potential loves ask him the same question about his flaming red. It was delightful to see their surprised expressions at their discovery that he was a true redhead. Now more than ever, Axel wanted to trail a finger down the line of silver-blue hair that promised more excitements below the waistband. Things would be different, being with another man, but then again Axel had done some pretty kinky stuff back in the day.

Even so, why would Axel have thoughts like this when he was not into guys; right? And Zexion was most definitely a guy despite that he had features that could be considered 'cute'. That was a problem, there was no way he was becoming attracted-

"You're doing it again." Zexion interrupted his thoughts. Axel jumped slightly.

"Hmm... You're right, I shouldn't think too hard." Standing up, he left the schemer to himself. Those thoughts were starting to become trouble. And if he was not careful, they might go to far and then there would be no turning back. Maybe, Axel glanced over his shoulder at Zexion, I don't want to turn back.

The two grinned at the ground. It was rather silly to talk about in Axel's opinion. But he guessed it helped. "You know," His friend broke the silence. "In a weird ass way, you are a helpless romantic."

"Maybe I am..." The pyro sighed, looking up at the sky.

"Well, at least I know how that turned out."

"Yeeah, sorry about that." Axel apologized. "There was probably a much better way for you to finding out."

"It's ok," The other smiled. "Sora has someone." The redhead looked at his friend in confusion. Why would the subject of Sora come up in a time like this? "Someday I will too."

Groaning, Axel looked up at the ceiling. His arms were crossed behind his head in his normal resting position. Those thoughts of Zexion would not go away. The way the other would avoid being near him and the same time look at him in some intense way that only Axel could see. Reddish, yellow played on the wall of his room from the glowing fire materia. It was more thoughtful then his stupid books and monster bookmarks. Looking over at the ball enveloped with flames, he wished that he had done what he wanted to do when giving Zexion his Christmas present.

He would've rejected it. He sighed dismally at the thought. You don't know that. They had been close enough. It could have been a stolen kiss, quick and light on the lips that looked almost poised for him as the schemer titled his head up slightly to look directly at him. He could have just let their lips brush softly together for half a second and rush away before the other could figure out what happened. But he knew that would not have been the case. At the first feel, first taste, Axel would have yanked that lithe body into his arms and pinned him to the soft looking bed to make love to the young man.

Fucking, shit. Axel rolled over and moaned into his pillow. I am into a fucking guy... Oh, but not just any guy. It had to be Zexion. Feelings admitted he knew that he would have to ignore them. They were friends now and Axel did not want to mess things up. But things were never that simple. Axel was easy to shatter when it came to anything to do with sex. And in the end, there was no turning back. His blood raced through his veins. And I'd do it again and again. Too bad there is only one first time.