One Year

Author's note and disclaimer: This takes place a year after Haley/Ashley's death. I do not own TMNT.

Chapter One

September eighth, a year after Haley's murder. The high school had a minute of silence, followed by a bunch of her followers that went to every show blaring her music down the halls. Her locker, which remained empty and would until her graduating class graduated, was decorated with flowers, fake candles and stuffed animals that she probably would have set on fire. The club that Haley and her band played at, held a memorial service, playing nothing but her favorite songs and lit up the case that held her guitar and a picture of her flipping off the camera.

April and Casey skipped school that day and hung out with the brothers in the lair. Everyone walked on egg shells around Raphael, even though he said he was fine. The hot headed turtle was still grieving, but they were happy to see that he was eating and sleeping regularly again. He was his usual self again, but you could see the sadness in his eyes or the broken expression when he thought no one was looking. He used training and beating up the bad guys as a distraction and visited Haley's grave every night. In his room, he had tacked up her shirt and had tucked her songs in a shoe box and kept it underneath his bed, but never forgotten.

Donatello printed all the photos that she was in and randomly placed them around the lair. The genius wanted to show his brother that they would never forget her. Raphael appreciated everything his family and friends did for him. However, before they went to visit her grave, he wanted to be alone. They didn't try to stop him when he left.

Raphael welcomed the chilly air as he jumped from roof top to roof top. Last year, it was already starting to snow, but thankfully the weather was holding back for their sake. It was still warm enough for the turtles to go out without having to put on the fifty pounds of winter coats and accessories. That made moving around a lot easier and getting to Haley's favorite in the city a lot quicker. It was a water tower, high on the roof top, but low enough where she could see over the river. The lights of the buildings that looked like stars reflected in the water. And the actual stars that managed to shine through the clouds and pollution. Raphael didn't do much while he silently sat there, glancing up the sparkling sky. He wished for her return every night and every morning he prayed that she would be standing in the lair with her devilish smirk and up-to-no-good presence. There were some nights when he entered the deepest dream and she would be there. They would have entire conversations, he would catch her up on the latest news and how everyone was doing. It was like she never died.

But then he had nightmares of the day he held Haley in his arms, blood everywhere, desperate murmurs and sobbing. They would always end with Haley calling out for him and it didn't matter how fast Raphael ran towards her, she was always a hundred miles away. The turtle could barely make out her words, they sounded like a warning or a plea. He tried desperately to hear them, but by the time he could make out one word he would snap awake; drenching in sweat and his throat hoarse from screaming in his sleep.

Leonardo was usual the one to wake his tormented brother, he had gotten into the habit when Haley first died—when Raphael would fall asleep from sheer exhaustion and would wake up screaming for her. No one else knew about his nightmares and if they did they didn't talk about it. Raphael wanted it that way. He didn't want their pity.

The one year anniversary started out the same as any other day, Leonardo woke him from his nightmare, and they would train until the others woke up and pretend that nothing happened. But today Raphael could tell that Leonardo wanted to talk, he probably wanted to know the details of his nightmares. He knew, however, that the leader wouldn't pry. The oldest would leave his brother alone, knowing that is exactly what he wanted.

Sitting alone on a water tower, feeling Haley's presence all around him. The smell of her cherry blossom shampoo whipping around him, her voice singing with the wind and the chilly touch of her hand against his cheek.

Raphael brought his knees up to his plastron and wrapped his arms around them. With his head laying against them, he cried freely, letting all of his frustration and sorrowful tears escape one after another. He repeated how much he missed her until the cold wind robbed him of the air in his lungs. He collapsed onto the surface of the tower, hearing her voice lull him to sleep, pulling him farther and farther away.

"Raphael…please…" Haley towered over him, his head in the warmth of her lap. "Wake up Raph, I need you."

Raphael's head snapped up, his phone was ringing—vibrating in the holster. He didn't bother to answer April, he ignored her and the other two times she called until her face disappeared altogether. After rubbing his eyes and stifling a yawn, Raphael took off towards the cemetery. He didn't know if the others were still at her tomb or if they had gone home. If they were back home, comfy and warm, he wouldn't blame them. The temperature had dropped several degrees after the sun finally said good bye.

Jumping from roof to roof he saw a flicker of light. He rolled his green eyes, whatever it was it would have to wait. Raphael did not feel like playing detective, not tonight of all nights. He wanted to check in on Haley, even though he knew that she wasn't going anywhere. He cringed, that single thought sent his stomach swirling. The memory of feeling her body growing cold and stiff in his arms snapped his nerves.

He suddenly stopped, using the brick entrance to the roof for support as his stomach emptied itself. Using the back of his hand, Raphael wiped away whatever vomit remained on his lips. His mind drifted to his dream. Just being able to feel the warmth from her body, the brightness and warmth from her smile beamed down at him was enough to fool him into believing that she wasn't gone. That she was close by.

Raphael shook his head as he approached the ledge. It was his mind playing tricks on him. Master Splinter explained it to him that his mind would do this to him that he would miss her so much that he would imagine her to be near him. His sensei told him that he sometimes thought that Teng Chen was still alive because of the memories or the dreams that he would have. Raphael had trained himself to be able to tell what was real and what was not, but there were times where he just let himself fall into that delusion. This always led to bite him in the ass later on. Her body would decay in his arms and he would wake up with a hot sweat staining his sheets.

Raphael didn't see the shiny object that caught his eye. He shrugged it off—thinking that it was probably a bird with a watch in its talons. He continued his running, sprinting towards his destination. After flipping off one building and landing on another, he happened to look to his left and saw a person do several flips until she landed on a nearby building. The moon was enough light for Raphael to get a good look of her. Her hair was dark brown, cut short in the back, but longer in the front—the ends straight and sharp. He couldn't see the color of her eyes, but they looked fierce—focus. Her nose and mouth were covered with a black cloth, hiding the rest of her face from him, but there was something about her profile that sparked his heart.

Her whole outfit was intimidating. Her black high heeled boots went up to her knees, the under armor was black and the shirt she wore was strapless and midnight blue. It was snug around her frame. Around her hips was a metal belt and on her right shoulder was leather, dark red gladiator style shoulder armor. When their eyes met Raphael felt his whole body go numb. The way her eyes saw right through him. He felt like she found his darkest and deepest fears and twisted them—perverting them—before ripping them out of his soul.

A high pitched whistle caught both of their attention, but obviously it was for the girl because she disappeared the instant the noise ceased. Raphael attempted to follow her, but she was already gone—along with her trail. He stood where she did, trying to wrap his mind around the stranger because something in his gut told him that he knew her. Raphael cursed at himself, he knew better than to think that it was Haley.

As he sprinted towards the cemetery he told himself over and over that Haley was dead. The red turtle forced himself to remember how she died, how she died in his arms. How happy she looked to be with him in her final moments. How his wishing for her to come back would never happen, that it was all wishful thinking. He decided that he would talk to Master Splinter when he got home, maybe he could tell him that it was his minds playing tricks on him again.

At the cemetery Raphael found no one waiting for him and for that he was thankful. He imagined that Haley was actually there with him. Sitting on top of her grave with one leg tucked under the other that dangled free. Her eyes were mischievous and her one sided smile was smug—like she knew why he was there to see her.

He imagined her smoky voice, it made it easier to talk to a slab of concrete. "Did you finally make your decision lame ass?"

Raphael laughed, even his imaginary Haley gave him attitude. He squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath before he replied to his imaginary friend. "Yea I have. Tonight will be the last night that I'll come see you. It's time that I move on and I can't do that if I come see you every night. I need to hit the streets and help people, just like old times."

Haley laughed, it was a real, contagious, laugh. "It's about time loser. You're not the only one that needs to move on. I've got bigger and better things to do."

"So Hell is that nice?" Raphael retorted.

"Pft no. There aren't any raptors to ride and Satan is incredibly lame. I got the big guy upstairs to move me, there are a lot more parties happening behind the golden gates." Haley jumped off her marker, leaned down and kissed Raphael on the cheek. "I'll see you around, Raph."

Oroku Saki glared down at Karai and Tiger Claw. Karai kept the girl close to her as possible, protecting her from Saki's wrath.

"You lost sight of her? For how long?" His gravelly voice echoed throughout the room.

"It was only for a few seconds, but she came back when we called." Karai defended.

Saki clenched his fists and darkened his dagger like stare, "And what if she hadn't returned?" He stood from his chair and slowly approached them. "I did not spend a year conditioning her, bending her to my whims just to lose her."

Karai and Tiger Claw stepped out of his way, revealing the intimidating girl. Saki cupped her chin, forcefully moving her face side to side. "Did she see anything or anyone?"

Karai shrugged, "If by anyone you mean the turtles, no she didn't see them."

Saki paid close attention to the girl's face when the turtles were mentioned. Nothing changed, her face remained as stoic as ever. He smiled wickedly, "Tell me Enyo. Who do you serve?"

She removed her mask, slipping it under her chin. Her voice was unemotional as her face, monotone, but at the same time smoky and hoarse. "I serve you, Master Shredder. You and only you."

Author's note: I'm kicking myself in the ass right now. I'm just now starting to edit this and I'm supposed to start releasing everything next month.

Update: It's March 7th and I'm just gonna start uploading all of this. One chapter a week. There's sixteen chapters. If I forget (because there's a high possibility that I will) just message me (your emails are sent straight to my personal email) and remind me. I won't bite your head off.