Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended. Thanks as always go to my betas, U2Shay and Adt216, for their beta skills and to kejce for pre reading.
A/N: This one was both fun and frustrating to write. Keep in mind neither of them has any...experience.
Direction
Jasper paced the small space between Alice's bed and her bureau. In the mirror he caught a glimpse of his nervous expression. At that very moment, Alice was on the other side of the bedroom wall changing into her night clothes. The thought both frightened and excited Jasper. The woman he'd only dreamt of over the last year was finally going to be in his arms, lying with him as his wife.
My wife.
The word, so foreign, so new to his mind gave him pause each time it rolled through his mind. He had hoped…no, he'd fervently prayed that Alice's feelings for him had not diminished with his absence. He never anticipated getting married on the night of their reunion.
Could it even be called a reunion if they'd never met?
Jasper quickly banished that thought from his mind. Through his letters, he'd opened himself up to her. It was certain that she knew him better than anyone else. He told her his history, his dreams, his fears and his sorrows. Though it had been done over an ocean, the distance was only physical. It didn't take away how his heart had grown to know and love her.
Thank God she feels the same.
The first moment he saw her face he knew his heart had found its home. Her beauty stunned him. Though half awake, with amber curls floating riotously around her, he could never have imagined anything more perfect. She was a beautiful angel dressed in a white night robe. Then, when the spark of recognition finally hit her face, lighting up her eyes, it was all he could do to refrain from snatching her up into his arms.
As it was, she threw herself at me.
The pain in his shoulder when she leapt into his arms had been searing, but he pushed it aside to revel in the beauty clasped tightly in his embrace. That moment, when he felt her in his arms, would be forever etched in his memory. And now, now he nervously considered making a very different kind of memory with her.
Jasper continued to pace, wondering if he should undress or wait for Alice. Should he sit on the bed or lie beneath the covers. The uncertainty was making him nauseous. He didn't want to offend. He didn't want to presume either. So he paced a few more times before deciding he'd unbutton his shirt and slip off his shoes and socks and leave it at that.
As he pealed off the second sock he wondered if he should leave them on the floor as a joke, but he wasn't sure if she'd find it funny or frustrating so he tucked them into his shoes, deciding the first night was not the time to start a fight.
A fight? Would it even possible to fight with her? I'd cave; she'd win. Fight over…I'd grovel for her forgiveness and hope it'd be easy to make up.
Jasper smiled, thinking of all the things he'd have to look forward to with his new wife. He couldn't wait to introduce her to his folks, his brother, and he hoped soon, to Alec. His mind began to reel as he thought not only of his folks, but also of meeting hers. He began to worry about making a good impression and about how challenging it would be to keep their elopement a secret.
Taking their daughter's hand without their presence certainly won't endear me to them. It's abhorrent to take such a gift without their blessing.
And yet he did it anyway. Jasper shook his head. For once, he allowed his selfish side to win. He wanted her…so badly. After the initial shock of her proposal wore off, it was all he could do to keep up the charade of thinking it over. If God were allowing him to be with this angel, he wouldn't waste time thinking about it. If the damn war had taught him anything, it was that life was too short. Alice was his piece of heaven, his comfort, and though he felt he did not deserve it, she was also his reward. Jasper sighed, though he'd survived months of hell, he could still feel the weight of lost souls hanging around his neck. He silently wondered if they'd always be with him, waiting for his mind to quiet to remind him of their presence. He thought of Jacob and Quil, Captain Call and Col. Uley, and with the presence of each man accounted for in his heavy heart, he wished he'd been better, stronger, and more capable of saving them. His head fell to his hands, but when he closed his eyes, the nightmares that had often plagued him, were replaced by a sorrowful look on Alice's face.
He was married now. He had a responsibility to be good to her, to provide for her. He took a wife to love and honor, not to have her watch him crumble and cave in on himself. He didn't want to leave her with the shell of what he once was. He'd have to manage this somehow for her. He made himself a vow to always put her first and to swallow down his own pain to make her happy. He wasn't exactly sure how he'd do that, but he was sure as hell going to try.
Jasper lifted his head from his hands and looked toward the window seat. He stood, and for the first time, noticed an empty teacup and various pages curling away from the window. It seemed as if their warmth was shying away from the cold air blowing snowflakes against the windowpane. Light from the lamppost below allowed him to see that the snowflakes were falling harder now.
It's early to be snowing in November, isn't it?
Being from Texas, he wasn't sure. He'd have to remember to ask Alice if this was their first snow of the season.
First snow, first embrace, first dance…first night together.
He smiled a bit, then the nerves came back and Jasper again began to pace. As he moved toward the window, he spotted something on the floor, lit by the moonlight. Stooping to retrieve it, he found the light dancing off the face of the tiny button compass he'd sent to Alice all those months ago. He pinched it between his fingers and placed it in the palm of his hand. The tiny magnet spun the arrow back and forth until it settled on north, pointing him over toward the window. He followed along with his eyes until his vision rested on the pages lying on the seat. A glimmer of recognition hit him as the familiarity of the handwriting settled on him.
My letters.
As if drawn by an unseen force, Jasper moved the final two steps until he was standing before the words he'd written so long ago. Most of the letters lay in a stack, but one was off by itself resting closest to the teacup. Curious, he lifted the pages and moved even closer to the window so he could read the words he'd once written.
April 6, 1945
My Love, Miss Alice,
I love you…
… I never gave up hope for us…when I finally saw your love staring back at me, I was delirious with joy, weak with humility, and frankly, dumbfounded with pride. For what else could a man like me feel but joy, humility, and pride that the woman he loves says she loves him in return...
…remember who you are. You are your grandmother's daughter, loved and adored by a man who will always treat you as the gift that you are. So please allow me to remind you of what you have. You have a man who cannot live without you.
A set of delicate arms encircled Jasper from behind, causing him to startle and drop the page he was holding. Alice stooped and retrieved it for him, setting it back into his now shaking hands.
"This was my favorite," she whispered and nodded toward the page. "It made me see so much about you. You were so much braver than me. You weren't afraid of our age difference. You talked about the important things in life, like family, health, and love. You gave me a reason to stand up after Susan Clearwater tore me down. You had a future planned out for us, even when I was too afraid to hope for it."
Alice lifted a hand to lightly cup Jasper's cheek.
"You saw me. The me that I want to be. You challenged me. You gave me confidence. You were funny. You even teased me about the apple game and about my mortician suitor."
The reminder of her brief courtship with Jared allowed them both to crack a smile.
"You lit my soul on fire with your reaction to my sculptures." Alice took a steadying breath before repeating the words she'd long ago burned into her mind and her heart. "I'll tell you that my touch will be tender. My lips will be gentle. My arms will be strong around you. And my heart, my heart will definitely be skipping a beat."
"It is," he whispered as he closed the distance between them.
Jasper cradled Alice's face in his hands. His bowed his head and took her lips with his. His body, now flush against hers, burned for her touch. The words may have been his, but she was the one who inspired them. Soft kisses grew stronger as he allowed his embrace to show her what he felt in his heart. He was nervous, excited, happy, but above all, he felt blessed. He wanted Alice to feel each emotion coursing through him. It was a need, a thirst to be quenched by her arms, her lips, and her touch.
"Can you feel it?" he whispered as his kiss trailed along her jawline and up to her ear. "My heart is beating so fast. There's so much I want to say. So many ways I want to show you I love you, Alice. Will you let me?"
Alice nodded. Her words were lost against frenzied thoughts and overwhelming sensations. Jasper's lips once again found hers, taking her breath and giving her back a piece of his soul. She could feel his heart pounding and only hoped her touch would inspire the same feelings he stirred in her. Her fingers lightly traced up his arms, over his shoulders and into his wavy locks. They lingered there for a moment, fingering his hair until she gave into this need building inside of her. Though they were already touching, she wanted him closer. Alice traced her fingers down his collar and over his chest until she reached the open halves of his unbuttoned shirt. She pulled him closer, wrenching him a half step closer as if she could bind herself to him. Seconds later her skin prickled as Jasper lifted her nightgown up over her head.
Alice lifted her eyes from the buttons of Jasper's shirt. She watched his Adam's apple bob and the rapid rise and fall of his chest as she smoothed her palms over the line of his chest. She went to push his shirt from his shoulders, but Jasper stilled her hands by pulling her body against his. His lips traced along the line of her jaw, down her neck and across her chest. He took another step, moving his body with hers, tilting Alice back onto her bed.
Nervous energy ran through Jasper. He didn't know where to kiss or touch first. He only knew her every touch made him feel good and he wanted to do the same for her.
Alice's nerves flared with her heartbeat as she watched Jasper crawl onto her bed. One of his hands firmly traced the supple skin of her thigh while the other moved over her abdomen, over her ribs until finally reaching her chest. Alice closed her eyes, nervous about her size being enough for him, but Jasper's words helped ease her worries.
"You're so beautiful," he said reverently.
It was the only thing he could think to say yet his words did not do her beauty justice. Jasper looked on in awe at the exquisite body laid out before him. Alice's pale skin reflected a silvery, almost ethereal, glow in the moonlight. He couldn't turn his eyes from her beautiful lines, the curve of her hip, the swell of her breast, the creamy expanse of skin beneath her chest. He had never been in the presence of a naked woman, but Alice had most definitely been worth the wait. Though he didn't deserve her, he silently vowed to spend his days trying to be worthy of her and his nights adoring her. Jasper leaned forward so that his lips could follow the path of his hand.
Alice didn't know if it was the sensations building in her body or the desire to have all of this man but whichever one it was, it gave her courage. She fought for control as her shaking hands moved to Jasper's waist. His stomach pulled back against his ribs as her fingertips traced the expanse of skin above his belt. His body froze above her, eyes closed, chest pulling in rapid breaths as Alice released his belt from his pants and brazenly pulled the tab down the teeth of his zipper.
Jasper's mumble was incoherent to Alice's ears, but in his mind he was praying for control. This was not the performance he'd been hoping for on his wedding night. He quickly realized he had to stop her. He'd have to be the one to remove his briefs. If she'd touched him, the event he dreamt of for months would be over before it even began.
Jasper rolled onto his back and began taking steadying breaths for control.
"Are you okay?" he heard Alice ask worriedly.
"I'm fine," he croaked, as his fingers fumbled with the buttons on his briefs. Jasper's voice was two octaves higher than normal.
Alice couldn't help it; she cracked a smile and tried very hard to stifle her snigger at the sound of his voice. To Alice's ears, he sounded much like a thirteen year old boy, his voice cracking with pubescence. Not unlike little Leah earlier in the evening, Alice clasped her hand over her mouth. She quickly shut her eyes, unwilling to look Jasper in the eye after her childish display.
Jasper had only just freed himself from the confines of his briefs in time to hear Alice's chortle. If performance anxiety hadn't already been worrying his mind, the reveal of his manhood to his bride's suppressed chuckle sure as hell did. Suddenly a premature performance seemed very unlikely. The sound of Alice's chuckle had taken care of that.
"I'm so sorry. This isn't the time to laugh," Alice breathed. "It's just that I'm nervous. It would be easier for me if I knew you were too."
Somehow Jasper found the courage to look up at his wife, who was now kneeling beside him. Her eyes were shut tight. Jasper breathed a sigh of relief with the understanding that she hadn't been laughing at his…gearstick.
Alice, who was still chastising herself for her nerves, slowly ventured to crack one eye open. There was her bridegroom, grinning back up at her.
"Alice," he sighed, lifting his left hand to cup her cheek. "I'm more nervous than you can imagine, but we don't have to—"
"I want to." She nodded vigorously, turning her head to kiss the palm of his hand. The motion brought her eyes down to glance at the new expanse of his skin that was now exposed.
Her eyes are as wide as saucers. Jasper smiled proudly to himself. Anxiety be damned.
Jasper allowed himself to gloat for just a moment before he spoke.
"I want to as well," he joked with a sweep of his hand. His eagerness seemed rather obvious.
That made Alice laugh a little and it did Jasper's heart good to see her relax a bit.
"We'll go slowly," he promised.
He lifted one of her hands from her lap and placed it over his heart. He had yet to remove his shirt and hoped Alice wouldn't press that. He wanted to her love, not her pity over his injury.
Jasper thought it would be best to give Alice control of how and when. He could see she was nervous. Hell, so was he, but he also saw something else sparkle in Alice's eyes. He though it was a hint of mischief mixed with determination, and he liked what he saw.
"I'm obviously ready whenever you are," he teased again, trying to relax them both.
The wicked gleam Alice saw in her young husband's eyes gave her the confidence she needed to make the first move. She moved her lips to the slip of skin peaking out from between the unbutton halves of Jasper's shirt. The sensuous trail elicited a gasp of breath from him bolstering Alice despite her nerves. With a slightly trembling hand, Alice moved lower to touch her husband, taking them both by surprise. She watched as his eyes closed and his body bowed into her touch. She felt a sense of pride that she could do this for him. More than anything else, she felt a thrill of excitement not only at his touch, but his laugh, his smile, his embrace. She had finally found what she'd been waiting for, she found her spark and he had most certainly been worth the wait.
Together their nerves gave way to something new as they took turns exploring. Each new expanse of skin gave them another chance to bring pleasure. Their movements were awkward at first, but their lust mingled with their love for each other overcame injury and inexperience. Nothing was overlooked, and nothing was rushed in the excitement of learning what pleased each other. For once, Alice and Jasper had all the time in the world.
aj**AJAJ**aj
Alice's head was pillowed on Jasper's stomach. She felt his hand tracing light circles over her bare shoulder. Alice's eyes drifted to her nightgown puddled on the floor beside her bed.
"I'm sorry I didn't have something more appropriate for a wedding night," she mused. "I didn't have time to find my trousseau. It was already packed away."
Jasper halted his tracing fingertips.
"You have one? Really?" he asked a second time as his eyes darted excitedly to the boxes surrounding the bed.
"No, silly," Alice teased. "It would have been a little presumptuous to have one on hand before you'd even asked for mine."
Jasper shrugged his good shoulder.
"I wouldn't think so. So long as it was for me and not for any of your other suitors."
Alice laughed.
"Only you. Believe me."
Alice lifted up on her side and began crawling over top of Jasper, allowing her body to trace his form. Her lips moved sensuously, taking the time to enjoy the feel of the line of his jaw, his throat and his broad chest. She paused over Jasper's heart and breathed the words I love you against this skin.
Alice's lower lip dragged along the chain around his neck, following the length as it ran back up toward his neck. Her fingers brushed away the loose edge of his shirt so she could kiss along his collar and uncover the skin of one of his muscular shoulders. She silently scolded herself for leaving this stone unturned during their lovemaking.
As Jasper's shirt moved aside, Alice froze, loosing her breath. There, lit by the moonlight, was an angry scar. The skin was pink and puckered against a jagged line gouged into Jasper's otherwise flawless skin. The muscle seemed both atrophied and somewhat misshapen between his shoulder and chest. The thought of what had inflicted this barely healed wound brought tears to Alice's eyes.
"My God, Jasper, what happened?"
Jasper threaded his good hand through Alice's waves and brushed his thumb over her cheek. He gave her a small smile, hoping it would comfort her and soften the sight of his wound.
"I got this the night my enemy became my friend and saved my life. I was injured in the process, but had it not been for this wound, I may not have come home to you."
His thumb again traced her cheek, only this time he worked to erase the tears that had fallen from her eyes.
"It's okay, Alice, don't cry. It gets a little better every day. They're not really sure if I'll ever have the full use of my arm, but doctors don't know everything. A few months on the farm and the comfort of a good woman will put me back into shape."
Alice shook her head at his attempt to lighten the subject.
"We're going to have to tie you to your saddle if you can't hold onto the reins with both hands," she teased.
Jasper smiled at the thought of her roping him into place on his saddle.
"You seemed to have picked up a lot for a girl who's never been on a horse before."
"Reading is no substitute for firsthand experience, but I'll do my best to get you into shape and back in your saddle again."
Whether Alice had realized it or not, her play on words had sent Jasper's mind in a completely different direction.
"I look forward to it, Mrs. Whitlock," he teased, but Alice didn't reply. She was too busy worrying over his shoulder, tracing the line of it with a feather light touch.
"Are you okay?" he worried, brushing his fingers up and down the exposed skin along Alice's back.
Alice nodded and resumed her place against Jasper's good side. Her body curved around his, taking in the warmth of his skin and the comfort of his arms. Their coupling had hurt at first, but now, held securely in his embrace, she couldn't imagine being any happier.
"I'm okay," she acknowledged. "Truthfully, I'm much better than okay now. Allow me to remind you of what you have," Alice quoted. "You have a woman who cannot live without you."
Jasper's lips fell to the top of Alice's head. His eyes shut against the memory of her letters being burned before his eyes.
"I wish…" he choked. "I wish I still had yours. They're all gone. They were taken from me and turned into ash. You don't know how much I wish I could have that piece of our beginning back."
Alice traced her hand over his chest to comfort him.
"You may not have our beginning, but you have our now. If I had to choose, the letters wouldn't have a prayer."
Jasper nodded his head at the truth in her words.
"You're right. Having even just a single moment to look in your eyes and feel your touch is worth even losing those letters."
Jasper lifted one of Alice's hands, kissed it gently, and set it against his heart.
"They're not really gone, I suppose. I'll always have a part of them in here."
A tear rolled down one of Alice's cheeks. She understood the honesty of his words because she felt the same. If his letters were suddenly gone, his words would always have a home in her heart. A moment later a memory flashed behind her eyes. Alice sat up and quickly kissed Jasper's lips. She rolled out of his arms and off the bed. Jasper was about to question her hasty departure when Alice answered his look of surprise.
"I have something for you."
She quickly moved across the room and opened the creaky drawer to her desk. Like so much earlier that evening, the drawer was reluctant to give up its final treasure. Alice eased it out along the sticking slide and plucked the last of its contents. She crawled up onto the bed and held a single envelope in the palms of her hands, presenting it to Jasper as an opportunity to recover a small portion of their past.
Jasper picked up the mottled envelope and immediately recognized his name written in Alice's fine script. His breath quickly caught as his eyes moved to the words stamped across it.
REPORTED KILLED.
"Oh, Alice, I'm so sorr—"
Alice silenced him with her lips, not wanting his sorrow tonight. Her letter had finally reached the hands of its rightful owner and there was absolutely nothing to be sorry about for that. Her lips moved to his cheek and his forehead before she stopped and wrapped her arms around him.
"It's all right, Jasper. At least it is now that you can hold this in your hands. Besides, if this one had made it to you, it would have been burned as well. There's one more that I wrote after you announced you were leaving for Berlin, but it hasn't been returned to me yet. I don't know if it ever will."
"Then I'll treasure this one even more."
Alice moved the pillows up against the headboard and rested her back against them. She beckoned Jasper to follow her.
"Why don't you open it?"
Jasper nodded and turned to lie between Alice's legs; his back rested against her front. He lifted a shaking hand and edged his finger between the seal prying the contents from the envelope sealed months ago. It had traveled an ocean, twice over, to rest beneath his fingertips. How lucky could he have been to see it survive and return to him? The similarity to his own survival was almost ironic. He rubbed a hand through his messy locks, cleared his throat and began to read.
"June 14, 1945. Dear Jasper, I should feel ashamed of myself for putting you through a heart stopping moment with my last letter, but I can't in all honesty say I feel very remorseful. That would put my soul in jeopardy as I'd never pass through the confessional doors with absolution. Instead, I'll just smile demurely, my love, and remind you that this "ol' girl" thought you had it coming."
A broad grin covered both of their faces as Jasper read the words aloud.
"I had it coming, huh?"
"Absolutely," Alice teased. "You already knew I was sensitive about our age difference. It was like throwing salt on an open wound. You're lucky that little prank was all I did."
Jasper turned and offered his apology, although it was a little tongue in cheek.
"Duly noted, Mrs. Whitlock, and I'm sorry," he said with a pout of his lips looking for a kiss. "Please forgive me."
Alice rolled her eyes at his mild sarcasm but acquiesced in giving him his kiss. She pushed playfully on the back of his head forcing him to return to his letter.
Once Jasper returned to reading, Alice began running her fingers through his hair and along his scalp. Jasper moaned at the sensation.
"Go on," she droned in a monotone voice, but she couldn't hide the playful smile on her lips.
Jasper huskily cleared his throat and resumed his letter.
"You, my Jasper, are cockier than a strutting peacock." Alice and Jasper both sniggered at her description. "You'd do best to remember that my sister is very much taken already. Trust me on this; I held her train as she walked down the aisle. Her wandering eyes hold appreciation over your photograph, but nothing more. Only one Brandon sister seeks your affections and that one is beginning to wonder if your over inflated ego would ever fit through her front door. Luckily for you, your flattery softens my ire over your smug attempts to fan the flames of my jealousy. Perhaps I'll grease the door frame with lard before your arrival to help ease your gigantic opinion of yourself through my doorway."
"I take offense to this!" Jasper said trying to keep a straight face. "As I recall, I had no problem easing my ego through your doorway either time I entered it tonight. Why can't you just admit you were jealous of her admiration of my photograph?"
"I'll admit nothing of the sort."
"Mmhmm. I can't wait to see how much her eyes wander when I get to meet her for the first time."
Alice's eyes grew very wide indeed.
"You wouldn't dare! Just remember, Mr. Whitlock, that Cindy is now your little sister as well and beguiling her with your good looks and clever smile will earn you no favors with your new Mrs."
"Fine, admit you were jealous."
"Fine. A little." Jasper quirked an eyebrow in response. He was trying his damn best to get Alice's goat. "Oh, fine, a lot. But don't let it all go to your head. I don't have any lard in the house."
Jasper lifted his good arm and brought Alice's lips down for a searing kiss. He tried very hard to return to her letter but her lips were proving hard to release. Finally, with one last brush, he blew out a heavy breath and returned to her words.
"Now what can I possibly say to your desire not to come in second to Collin on the list of men who hold my mother's affections? You are quite competitive, are you not? I must admit, my hopeless romantic, that making me happy for the rest of my days will certainly secure your place on my mother's top spot, and mine as well.
Alice smiled and pressed her lips to the top of his head, reading her letter was even more enjoyable than she could have imagined.
"I'd like to ease your mind a bit and tell you that my new self-defense classes are coming along swimmingly. Although I feel as though I should tell you that it is Bella, not Edward, who is my tutor."
"Did you really do this?" Jasper teased questioningly.
"Yup, wait till you read the rest. You won't be teasing me for long."
Jasper chortled and returned to her letter. His voice now sounded more like a news reporter's, formal and stiff. Alice laughed at his attempt to impersonate Mr. Murrow.
"Under her guidance I now possess the ability to break a man's nose with one quick thrust," Jasper gulped before resuming his normal voice. "Be forewarned, love…that the decadent peach pie you described from your mother is now mine. Consider it recompense for this frustrating form of communication we must hold over an entire ocean. If you're lucky, I will share a small piece with you. If not, well, let's just hope your nose sets properly. All kidding at your expense aside, my love, I'm glad to know our future will not only be filled with love but with happiness, laughter, and playful banter as well."
Jasper ran his free hand over the exposed skin of her leg.
"That it will, sweetheart," he agreed happily. "It most certainly will."
Jasper cleared his throat and continued on.
"School is winding down for the year and my little fledglings are ready to leave the nest. It's a little sad but also quite satisfying at the same time. I'm looking forward to the long summer days and the opportunity to spruce up around the house before new fledglings come to settle in next fall. Oh, I can pass along some good news: Brady has been successful enough in his arithmetic to earn a seat in third grade next school year. I've congratulated him many times over and asked if there was anything special he'd like to do to celebrate his solid B+ average. He looked at me with beautiful, soulful eyes and asked if he could meet the real live soldier who gave me the compass in my jar. It seems as though you have a young fan, Jasper. I smiled at Brady and told him that I'd see what I could do once you return home."
Alice pulled in a heavy breath.
"I stopped teaching."
"You did? Because of me?"
Alice nodded with her head over top of Jasper's.
"I just wasn't myself after hearing the news. I'd kind of lost who I was for a while. I wouldn't have been a good teacher for them. I was a mess. I'd just gotten this letter back in the mail and broke down. My mother suggested I take a semester off to get better, but in some ways it was worse."
"Alice, I'm so, so sorry. I never wanted you to hurt like that. Not ever."
Her hand traced his beautiful face and sorrowful eyes.
"Is it any worse than what you went through to get home to me?"
The light faded behind his eyes as memories trickled through him.
"Of course it wasn't. But that's why we're here, to share the happiness and the sorrows with each other. You'll help me and I will do the same for you. I will be your shoulder to lean on when the memories come back. Nothing will be too hard to overcome so long as we face it together."
Jasper kissed Alice hard and realized that his plans of being strong for her weren't enough. He didn't always have to be strong. He had to be open and honest as she just asked. Somewhere up in heaven a guardian angel was smiling down at her own fledgling coming of age.
"Thank you," he whispered against her lips. "You don't know how much I needed to hear that."
"Probably about as much as I needed you to accept it," she replied, brushing a length of hair that had fallen in his eyes.
He rolled to his back contentedly and picked up where he'd left off.
"As for your remarks of fighting valiantly to secure my photograph, just know that Perseus holds not one candle to you in my eyes. Like any romantic, I melt a little at the idea of you battling in my honor, but be assured that no one could sweep me away from you. Haven't we proven that to each other time and time again? I am yours, Jasper. Smile and sleep well each night knowing that I dream of seeing your smile and feeling only your warm embrace."
Jasper picked up one of Alice's hands from around his neck and brought it to his lips for a kiss.
"Every night from this night forward," he promised.
"Unfortunately, your request asking me not to worry has fallen on deaf ears. How is it possible for me not to wonder and worry for your safety? As for your footlocker and where it will land next, I'd most prefer it to rest soundly on U.S. soil. At the same time, I begrudgingly acknowledge that the job of our soldiers is not yet complete, so I'll put my faith in God and in you that you'll land safely wherever you are needed. I too take comfort in the knowledge that the amount of time remaining that separates us is shorter than the time that has already passed between us."
"Just barely," Alice said sadly.
"At least I made it before Thanksgiving," he teased, hoping to lighten her mood.
"True, but I'd rather call you late for dinner than the late Jasper Whitlock ever again."
Jasper laughed at her pun. "I am a blessed man. We are going to have a very happy life together, Miss Alice."
"Not anymore."
"Right." He grinned, kissing the gold band that spun loosely on her ring finger.
He happily settled back into her embrace to finish the last lines of her letter.
"In closing," he read softly. "I want you to know, that you don't have to wait to earn my hand, Jasper. Your letters captured my heart long ago. Where my heart goes, my hand will follow. I love you. Be safe and come home to me. Yours always, Alice."
Jasper turned in her arms and pulled at the back of her neck taking her soft lips with his. He couldn't seem to get enough of the warmth of her touch. She was like fresh air to his long submerged lungs. When they finally broke apart, he carefully moved them both so that he was lying on his back with Alice kneeling over top of him. He lifted their entwined hands and rested them over his heart.
"I'm home."
Alice's words had spoken volumes. Even months ago she had offered her heart to him, ready to become his wife. Now, with their future spread out before them, he was truly home in her arms.
aj**AJAJ**aj
Jasper hoped for a peaceful night in Alice's bed, surrounded by her arms, but it wasn't. Worries swirled through his mind, like the set of angry bees he'd felt before he woke in that London hospital. He was agitated. He worried for Demetri. He grieved the loss of the Pathfinders. Mostly he hoped that what he'd told Alice was true, that in a few months his shoulder would be as good as new. He worried about what kind of rancher and husband he would be with a lame arm.
His shoulder flared again in pain. He'd done more with it in the last twenty-four hours than he had in months, and at the moment he was paying the price. Unable to sleep any longer, he quietly rolled out of bed and found his trousers on the floor. He groaned as he pulled them into place, unable to stifle the pain as he worked the button and simple zipper. With one last kiss to the Alice's cheek he made his way downstairs in search of some relief.
His duffel was right where he'd dropped it, on the porch, just outside of Alice's front door. Jasper shivered against the cold, seeing the result of the snowflakes that had fallen through the night. It wasn't a heavy snow; not much more than a dusting had stuck to the driveway and Jasper breathed a sigh of relief at not having to shovel it clean in order to move her car. He'd have to ask Alice if it could make the nearly two thousand mile trip to Texas.
The thought of that trip, reminded him of his promise to call his parents. Jasper dragged his bag through the door and shut out the cold on the other side. It was light out, probably about six or seven in the morning and his parents would have been up by this hour at home. He wracked his brain trying to clear the cobwebs and remember the time difference between Maryland and Texas.
No matter, they'll be up.
The first order of business was pain relief. Jasper knelt beside his bag and ruffled around until he found the bottle of medication he desperately needed. He downed two tablets without water, hoping to put out the fire running down his arm. With a heavy breath he sat back on his haunches and tried to figure out the day. Once again, reality set down upon him, but for the first morning in months, it did not set with fear. Happiness that had settled deep into his bones as he thought of the life spread out ahead of him.
Alice loves me. We're married.
Once again struck dumb by that fact, he couldn't begin to wipe the grin from his face. Pain or not, he'd be damned if he'd ruin his first morning with her. He didn't have a ring for her, or a proper home, but at minimum he could bring her breakfast in bed.
Jasper padded through the living room but halted at the sight of the telephone table.
First things first, he thought to himself, hoping his bride would stay asleep a little longer.
Jasper's parents were still in a state of shock, but his mother welcomed his voice with a fresh round of sniffles. After about twenty minutes of re-establishing the state of his health and how he came to land in Maryland, his mother asked a question Jasper had trouble answering truthfully. He bit the inside of his cheek hoping his mother couldn't see the green dot on his nose as he stretched the truth from Maryland to Texas.
"I'll see Alice in a little while, Ma. I need to rustle up some breakfast first."
As in a very little while, like in ten minutes when I go and awaken my bride.
"Are you eating well?" she worried.
"I'll be fine, Ma, but I'm sure you'll have plenty for me to eat once I get home."
"I will. We'll have pies and sweetbread, anything you want."
Jasper finished the conversation, promising them to call again in the morning. The call ended with the expectation that they'd be on their way to Texas in a day or two.
Home.
The night before Jasper's heart could not have grown any more full and complete when Alice said she'd follow him home. The image of a home overlooking the ridge where the sunset kissed the horizon each afternoon seemed closer than he ever imagined. He couldn't wait to take her riding and give her their first afternoon sunset together. He'd have his ma help him pack a picnic and would spoil Alice, feeding her as she laid her head in his lap. The images Jasper conjured in his mind filled him with a surging desire to return to his wife, with breakfast.
Jasper strolled into the kitchen, noting how it had been later than he'd first thought. The clock above the stove read shortly after eight. Though it seemed late and a lazy way to spend a Saturday morning, in reality neither he nor Alice had managed much sleep last night. The thought brought on another sleepy grin. The kitchen was clean and tidy. In fact, more than tidy, it was sparse. Jasper thought coffee was the first order of business and moved through the cabinets in search of her coffee pot. He was just about to give up hope when he salvation was discovered beneath the sink. Little did Jasper know that finding it would be the easy part. He then spent the next several minutes trying to decipher what piece went where because as he pried the lid from the pot, the contents flew every which way giving him no idea how to reassemble them properly.
It certainly can't be any harder than cleaning and assembling my rifle.
Jasper smiled at the lame joke he'd once written saying that the only opportunity for him to use his gray matter beyond writing to her was the cleaning and assembly of his weapon.
Jasper sighed. Although the coffee was less of a challenge to find, he had no idea how much to put in the basket. Three scoops just hardly seemed like enough, so ignoring the directions on the back of the Maxwell House can, Jasper dumped the better part of the contents into the basket and set it on the stove.
Alice was certainly right when she'd mentioned she wasn't planning on having any guests last night. Her refrigerator was practically bare. Jasper frowned, staring blankly at its nearly empty contents. The glow from the bright white filament burned into his eyes, causing him to see the jagged line whenever he blinked. Jasper was about to give up, realizing that relish and mayonnaise weren't suitable for breakfast when he spied a carton of eggs in the refrigerator door. For the second time that morning, he saw salvation through sustenance. Jasper couldn't find a skillet so fried eggs were out. The best he could manage was a single pot. With his stomach growing angrier by the moment, he opened the tap to allow the water to heat, thinking hot water would boil faster than cold would. Jasper again stuck his head into the fridge, hoping he'd somehow missed some bread for toast and jelly, but he had not. He scratched his head and then the scruff of his jaw when inspiration struck. Alice had pulled slices of cake from her freezer last night. Maybe she had extra bread in there too so it wouldn't spoil. With the pot in his left hand Jasper opened the freezer door and began digging around, lifting various items wrapped in waxed paper and examining them in hopes of finding some bread.
Suddenly the freezer door slammed against his head, causing Jasper to cry out in pain and drop the pot that had been in his hand. Bewildered and dazed he took a step back, covering his head and clutching his ear protectively. He looked down only to find a woman's shoes standing not three feet from him.
"Who are you? Where's Alice?" the voice commanded.
Jasper, snapped upright, hitting his head against the open freezer door.
"Ow, goddammit!" he cried again.
"Bella?" a voice called from a few rooms away near the front of the house.
When Jasper heard that name, he stood up straight to face his attacker. There before him was Bella Masen, wielding an ominous looking baseball bat in both hands.
"Oh my God," she cried, dropping the bat and covering her mouth with one of her hands.
"BELLA!" the voice called out again as heavy footsteps echoed in rapid pace through the house.
Before Jasper even had the clarity of mind to answer Bella, Edward was streaming toward them, ready to take on anything that would cause his wife that kind of fear. He caught Bella by the arm as she stumbled backward and away from the ghost before her.
"Jasper," Edward breathed in disbelief. He suddenly felt he didn't have the legs to hold himself up let alone both his weight and that of his wife.
Jasper nodded slowly, lowering his hand from his throbbing ear. He barely had the presence of mind to shut the freezer door when Bella rushed him, throwing her thin arms around his waist.
Jasper suddenly realized his state of undress. He was barefoot and shirtless in Alice's kitchen in an early morning hour. This certainly would not look good or be easy to explain if they wanted to keep their marriage under wraps. Jasper hugged Bella back and looked into Edward's wide eyes while wracking his brain for a plausible answer for his state of undress.
"You're alive," Bella cried. "Alice…Oh God, Alice—"
Before Bella could finish that thought, a high pitched scream came from upstairs followed by a desperate moan.
"No, no, no, no, no!"
It was Alice's voice, so wracked with anguish that it nearly broke Jasper in two. He didn't have time to think. He broke from Bella's embrace and tore up the stairs in a frantic search for his wife.
A/N: There's a picture for this chapter. (Ashley is so pretty) You can find it here: http:/pics(dot)livejournal(dot)com/firstblushes/pic/0001z7ar
Three more chapters and and epilouge to go.
Thanks for reading and let me know what you think,
-FirstBlush
The Long Way Home Historical Research and Reference Guide: Chapter 35 Direction
Story reference: Jasper see's the snowfall the morning after his marriage to Alice and wonders if it's the first snowfall of the year. He can't remember seeing snow in Nickel Creek.
Source: Weather and recorded annual snowfalls in Texas: http:/en(dot)wikipedia(dot)org/wiki/Climate_of_Texas
Story reference: Jasper reads part of Alice's lost letter in the formal voice of a news reporter mimicking Edward R. Murrow.
Historical Significance: Edward R. Murrow lined up CBS correspondents in several European cities. CBS initiated the evening news round-up, tuning in successive correspondents live via short wave radio during the newscast. The daily developments were heard instantaneously across America.
Source: http:/www(dot)radioscribe(dot)com/formats(dot)html
Story reference: Jasper fumbles his way through making coffee and assembling Alice's stovetop percolator.
Historical Significance: Classic Farberware stovetop coffee pot. And before you laugh at me, yes I had a hard time trying to figure out how to clean and re-assemble my mother's. (although hers was an electric model from the 1970's)
Source: http:/www(dot)amazon(dot)com/gp/customer-media/product-gallery/B00005NCWQ/ref=cm_ciu_pdp_images_1?ie=UTF8&index=1