14. Joanna – Christine

Part III

Let's start to lay the puzzle pieces. I hope you've been paying attention. Maybe you can see what's coming since I've been leaving hints – but I hope I haven't become too predictable! I like the song Fall Away by The Fray for this but I'll take suggestions. Sorry I've put this up alone. I'm still working on a couple of things for McCoy's POV. Thanks for reading and reviewing.

She didn't sleep. She couldn't. She was often restless as night, that was nothing new, but tonight was worse than normal. Because try as she might she couldn't turn her thoughts from him. She wondered whether this was what it felt like to be insane. She got up and sat at her desk in the darkness. She had been on this ship for eight months. In that time she had changed. And it terrified her. When she had come aboard she was so in control – but he had, from day one, made her feel things that scared her. Then she had managed to fall in love with him. How could she not have? Now she was destined to spend the next four years taking the consolation prize – watching for his every smile, leaning into his every touch, and never having him. And why was that? Because she wasn't sure of his feelings? The Christine Chapel that had once left Earth at twenty-one would have never sat here waiting for a sign that he cared for her. She would have marched to his door, kissed him, and dealt with the consequences. But she had done that with Roger – and he had damaged her. The bold, fearless girl that she had once been was gone. Now she was simply a broken woman that tried not to think too much about her feelings, because they hurt, and because she was all too aware of their consequences. Because she'd honestly never felt so deeply for anyone in her life – and that gave him power over her, which meant she needed to trust him. Which she wasn't sure she did. So instead, she sat in the darkness, watching the stars stream past and waiting for a sign from him that would never come. In a few hours she would get up and dressed as she always did, and knock on his door and spend more time with his daughter, who she was perilously close to falling in love with too, and stand in his lab, and speak to her patients, and all the while try to ignore the constant awareness she had for his every move, and the way he smiled at her and sometimes stood too close. But tonight, with only the stars as her witness, she would remember every look, every breath, his hands in her hair and his lips moving on hers in the rain.

"Good morning." The doctor's door slid open at exactly 0800, and she took in the bags under his eyes and the tension in his face, whilst trying, and very much failing, to ignore the fact he was shirtless and beautiful. He had a lot to worry about these days. So did she, if she allowed herself to think about it. Which she didn't because right now all that mattered was the small girl in his room and the list of things she needed to do today.

"I don't see what's so good about it." He frowned at her, making her smile, and allowed her into his room.

"Hi Christine." Joanna was sitting on the sofa eating cereal and sent her a desperate look as soon as her father walked into the bathroom. "Will you help me?" She whispered, and indicated to her hair. It was a mess in the same way that her father's resembled this morning, and made her smile. She sat down next to her and swiftly plaited it.

"Did you sleep well?" She asked as she tied it down and allowed the girl to examine herself in the mirror.

"I was ok. I got a bit sick in the night and dad had to hypospray me, and then I was fine."

"You often notice it more when you're lying still." She agreed with a smile.

"That's what dad said. I don't think he ever sleeps – he was awake when I got up."

"He often has a lot on his mind."

"Like what?"

"All sorts of things." Spies, Jim, the ship, his patients, his daughter… She wondered sometimes how he bore the weight. She knew he didn't share it all with her, that he kept most of his worries to himself.

"I think he's sad." Joanna sat down beside her again.

"Sad? Why's that?" Was he worrying about Joanna? She wished that he'd talk to her about how he was feeling sometimes.

"He just looked sad last night. I asked why, but he didn't tell me."

"Well I'm sure if there's anyone who could have cheered him up it would be you."

Joanna grinned at her, then looked at her curiously. "How do you put your hair up so neatly on your own?"

"Lots of practise."

"Do you think I could learn it?"

"Of course."

"Will you show me how to later?"

"If you like."

"Great! What are we doing this morning?"

"Well I need to supervise the handover."

"What's that?"

"It's where the nurses on the last shift go through any patients in the sickbay, and what's happened with them overnight so that we know what to do this morning. After that we'll find something fun for you to do while I'm at the meeting."

"Will my dad be at the meeting too?"

"Yes."

"Can't I stay with you then? I'll be quiet, I promise. I'll just sit at the back."

She laughed softly. "I'm sure you would, but it won't be very interesting, and it shouldn't last too long. I'm sure you'll enjoy being with the other nurses and Doctor Seams lots more."

"Maybe. Then you'll both be back?"

"That's right."

"Ok." She smiled at her brightly. "Doctor Seams says he'll show me how to use a dermal regenerator today."

"Why the hell would you ever need to use a dermal regenerator?" McCoy came out of the bathroom drying his hair. His daughter frowned at him.

"Well I think it sounds like a useful idea." Christine said evenly, and threw him a warning look that made him roll his eyes. She was a strong believer in educating everyone in first aid, and it looked like Joanna was desperate to impress her father by knowing it.

"Maybe you should train Hylara to use one before you start with Joanna." He scowled at her.

"And maybe you should brush your hair." She retorted calmly. They were going to a meeting with three Starfleet Admirals – and he was the CMO of the Enterprise.

He threw her a dirty look and muttered "Tyrant," but obediently retreated back into the bathroom as Joanna giggled.

"Get ready to go Joanna. You'd best not make Nurse Chapel late." He called grumpily.

"Just need to find my shoes." She jumped up and ran to the bedroom as he came out again, looking far more presentable.

"Much better." She told him with an honest smile. She wished that she didn't find him quite so attractive right now – and that he wasn't walking closer to her.

"Let's not pretend like anyone gives a damn what I look like Chapel."

"I do." She said without thinking, then tried very hard not to blush.

"Is that so?" He folded his arms and gave her a penetrating look.

"Yes. You represent our whole staff after all." She kept her voice calm.

He rolled his eyes. "We represent it Chapel, and we both know where the Admiral's eyes are going to be focused – or are you thinking of skipping the meeting?"

"No, I'll be there." She was definitely blushing now. Had that been a compliment?

He smiled at her and the butterflies danced in her stomach. "Good." Maybe it had been. She wasn't sure what to make of it. She also wasn't sure whether she was capable of turning away from the expression in his eyes. Or breathing.

"Ready." Joanna called to them, and he broke their gaze. She swiftly attempted to pull herself together.

"Good." They followed her out of the door and into the corridor. McCoy was looking worried again as he glanced at his daughter. "I'd better go and find Jim. You'll be alright?"

"Yep. We're going to do the handover." The girl smiled at him. Christine felt a wave of affection for her – she could see her father was torn and was making things easier for him.

"Well make sure that my patients are being good. I'll be back soon."

"Ok." She hugged him around the middle, and he smiled slightly.

"I'll see you at the meeting Chapel." He glanced at her.

"Yes."

The girl released him, and he turned in the opposite direction. Joanna took her hand, and Christine was glad. She needed it.

"Christine?" They began to walk to the sickbay.

"Yes?"

"Why does my dad call you Chapel and not Christine?"

"I don't know Joanna. Why do you think?" She guessed it was for the same reason she called him doctor – because she respected him, and because calling him anything else would cross some line they had drawn unconsciously.

"Maybe he thinks Chapel suits you better."

She smiled. "Maybe. Do you think that?"

"No. I think that Christine is the best. I'm going to tell dad that he should call you that."

"I'm not sure he'll listen – but not to worry. I don't mind when it's him."

Joanna gave her a sidelong look and smiled slowly. "Do you have a boyfriend, Christine?"

She glanced at the girl in surprise. "A boyfriend? No I don't have a boyfriend."

"Why?"

"Well, I'm very busy." And also very much in love with her father.

"My dad's busy too. And he doesn't have a girlfriend. Maybe you and him should fall in love."

She laughed. She couldn't help it. Was she trying to matchmake them? She could see McCoy liking that... "You don't decide who you fall in love with, Joanna."

"But don't you think my dad is handsome?"

"I suppose..."

"And you like him, and he likes you."

"Like is very different from love." She pointed out.

"That's what dad said too."

She felt herself pause. "You've spoken to your father about this?"

"Yep." Well that explained a lot.

"Joanna, your father and I are very good friends but we could never be more than that – there's lots of regulations against it." The girl looked somewhat downcast. She knew that feeling well. "That doesn't mean that I don't care about him."

"Do you love him?" Joanna gave her a penetrating look and she felt suddenly vulnerable.

"Here we are." They arrived at the sickbay just in time and she was saved from answering. Telling her feelings to McCoy's daughter was not a good idea – especially if she didn't want him to find out about them. Luckily the bustle of the sickbay seemed to distract Joanna too, and they spent the next hour organising various things and checking on patients. At 0855 she left her with Doctor Seams and made her way to the meeting.

The ready room was busy. Jim sat at the front with the three admirals, and Plat the Illyrian. She was the last in and Jim gave her a grin as she swiftly took a seat next to the doctor and Scott.

"She's fine." She whispered, when McCoy gave her a look of askance. He nodded and they both turned as Admiral Pike cleared his throat.

"Right, let's get down to business. As you all know me, I'm not going to bother introducing myself, but this is Admiral Chapman, head of Starfleet Intelligence; Admiral Brooks, his deputy; and Plat, who has been working undercover for Starfleet Intelligence for some years." She glanced in surprise at Sulu, who was looking equally shocked at that pronouncement. He was an intelligence agent? Was that why he'd been at the Institute? "I appreciate you all being so patient over the last few days – I know that your experience at the Daystrom Institute wasn't pleasant for anyone, and that you'll undoubtedly have questions, but if you could save them for the end that would be appreciated." The Admiral picked up a datapad, and frowned slightly. If she didn't know him better, she would have thought the man was nervous. What did he have to tell them that made him nervous?

"Admiral Chapman. Would you like to continue?"

The elderly gentleman nodded, stood stiffly, and began in a rasping voice. "Almost eight months ago the Enterprise rescued two Tellerite Ambassadors whilst docked and undergoing repairs. The ambassadors were apparently fleeing a hoard of Romulan ships after disappearing on the surface of Romulus. In fact, the ambassadors were keepers of a few very important pieces of information, which would have died with them had Kirk and McCoy not beamed over to the ship to pull them out." He gave a nod to them both. Jim frowned but returned it. McCoy didn't move, but she felt him stiffen beside her. He beamed over to a ship travelling at warp? Wasn't that on her first day? No wonder he'd been tightly wound. He hadn't told her that he'd done that – but then she was beginning to think that there were a lot of things that happened in his life that he didn't tell her about.

"The information that they provided was concerning a group that call themselves I'sorta Prime." She heard several indrawn breaths, but the name meant nothing to her. "As many of you are aware, this group claimed responsibility for the bombings on Lepta last year that killed almost thirty-thousand people." He flipped a button, and the screen filled with images of smoke, injured people, and row after row of the dead. She felt herself grow cold. "The Intelligence agencies have heard rumblings of such anti-Federation groups for some time, but the proof that the ambassadors carried confirmed three things that we had suspected – that this group was extremely organised – far more organised and on a larger scale than you would usually find, second there are more than thirty different species involved with the I'sorta, and finally that they were planning to mount a widespread attack on multiple planets to attempt to bring the Federation to its knees – attacks that would make Lepta look like a warm-up ." She digested this information slowly. So the masked people at the Institute were I'sorta? It explained why they had all been different species when she had removed the mask. He was right when he'd said that they were organised – she'd never seen soldiers from different species work so well together. And the man with the golden eyes? What was he? And why had he wanted her? "Consequently we sent several intelligence officers under cover to find out more information. Plat – being Illyrian – succeeded where most others failed due to his species obviously anti-Federation's beliefs."

"Which aren't of course, mirrored by Plat himself." Admiral Pike interrupted softly. Plat gave him a thankful nod, and Sulu grinned at him.

Admiral Chapman gave him a look of disdain before continuing. "Quite. He found out that there was to be a meeting of ships in the Neutral Zone – a recruitment and planning meeting if you will. However, we were unable to get anyone there – so we planted a probe in the hope that we might at least be able to identify the ships involved and go from there." She saw McCoy give the captain a significant look. Clearly something he said was familiar. "A month later we requested that the probe be picked up by the Enterprise, after it had drifted into Klingon territory. Your ship managed to succeed in this endeavour with very little bloodshed." She saw McCoy's hands make fists and touched his arm to calm him. She could still remember the faces of those they'd lost that day. She knew he could too. It would have been more had he not been there. The Admiral continued unknowingly. "The information we found from the probe allowed us to track some key players. However, so far, the group have always been one step ahead of us. I'm sure that most of you know of the events that Doctor McCoy faced on Brinda V." She felt herself freeze. Brinda was to do with this? It hadn't simply been an Orion plot? A small voice told her that of course it hadn't been. She hadn't really thought that – not deep down. Not when she considered the scale it had been on. "Such attempts to bring the Federation into disrepute are widespread, and anti-Federation sentiment has never been higher. In the last three months sixteen planets have ceased negotiations for admittance into the Federation, and at least three planets are considering pulling out of the treaty. We fear that this is only the beginning. Pike." He handed back over, and Pike nodded.

"I'm not going to mince words here. Daystrom has followed a pattern of events across the galaxy – but this was the first event involving Starfleet personnel. Things are getting serious. These people have an agenda and they chose the Institute for a reason. Many of the members have no reason to like the Federation. We're not just talking personal – but also planet-wide grievances. These people are armed, they have ships, and government backing. They also have shown that they are quite happy to kill. They are – in every meaning of the word – terrorists. Intelligence has told us that the next target is Earth. We don't know how – or what yet, but we're bringing the Enterprise back to help support our defences. They know that Earth is the key to the Federation. If it falls, the Federation will too. We need to make sure that doesn't happen." There was silence. An attack on Earth? No one had tried to attack Earth in hundreds of years. But if they situation really was on the scale that was suggested – and she was beginning to feel it was – then they were talking about war.

"Alright – time for questions." Pike looked across their faces, pausing, for a second too long, on hers.

"Admiral – you said that this people have an agenda. Would you please clarify what this is exactly?" Spock asked calmly on the other side of the table. She sometimes wished she were Vulcan – especially now, when her heart was pounding in her chest.

"In the short term, we believe it is to bring down the Federation. However, ultimately we aren't too sure." Chapman told them. "There are rumours of establishing a new government in its place."

The Vulcan tilted his head, and she saw him glance at McCoy. "Does the name I'sorta carry the significance that the Romulans give it?"

"I don't know what you mean." The Admiral frowned.

"I'sorta – literally translated from Romulan, means perfect place. It carries the same significance as the Human ideal of Utopia." Uhura told them. Utopia. The word echoed in her mind in another voice, and she felt something in her still. Utopia.

Pike seemed uncomfortable. "Perhaps." She had the feeling that meant yes – and that they'd been perfectly aware of the meaning of the word the whole time. "Any more questions?"

"Why choose the Institute?" The captain asked with a frown. She knew from his face that he had several theories of his own.

"As Commander Spock I'm sure will agree, it is a logical place to do a great deal of damage to multiple species involved with the Federation, especially in a new facility that is all about Federation co-working." Pike said calmly. "Plus the Tellerite ambassadors were present. It would be a good place for revenge." He paused as if deciding whether to say something else, then gave her a level look. She should have been surprised that he did. She wasn't. Neurones in her mind were connecting at an alarming speed. "There is also another reason why the Institute would be-."

"Need to know, Pike." Chapman interrupted him with a glare, and the Admiral fell silent, eyes still on her. A strange feeling – perhaps panic – was beginning to rise in her.

"If this is the same group from Lepta, why are we still alive?" Jim continued to ask. He was clearly more used than the rest of them to the evasive politics of Starfleet Command.

"As we understand it, the group were planning to use the captured people as hostages – most probably as bargaining chips for information." Chapman said. Clearly Pike wasn't trusted to answer anymore.

"But it wouldn't have been hard to beam us out of there – that was what happened in fact." Sulu pointed out. "Why chose a place that is so poorly defensible?"

Chapman frowned. "I couldn't say." But he could, she knew. Because she could. Because he was lying. They hadn't been planning to use them as hostages. They were planning to let them go all along. It was why it had been so easy. It was merely a distraction for something else entirely. She felt Plat's eyes on hers and met them. The look he gave her confirmed her fears. She was right.

"Anything else?" There was silence. "Good. If you would-."

"Are the Katarreans involved?" McCoy broke in suddenly, asking the one question she had been too scared to ask herself.

"The Katarreans?" Chapman was giving him an appraising look. "Why would you ask that – McCoy isn't it?"

"Just answer the question." McCoy growled at him, then added an afterthought. "Sir."

Chapman was frowning at him, and they stared at each other across the table. McCoy was angry – she could tell, even with his face blank there was that fire in his eyes. And she was beginning to feel sick.

A quiet new voice spoke into the silence. "The Katarreans are an interesting people. Few have ever seen one in this quadrant – since they can cloak their bodies as well as their ships." Admiral Brooks looked carefully at McCoy. "However, we do have information that the leader of the I'sorta is a Katarrean. Very few people know that doctor – I won't tell you how many people died for it. So I wonder why you would think they are involved?"

McCoy said nothing. She knew if he did he would have to tell them about her. About the man with the golden eyes. The man who was coming back for her. The leader of the I'sorta. But why shouldn't he tell them everything? She wondered whether it was for the same reason that glued her mouth shut.

"Very well. You and I shall talk later, Doctor." McCoy scowled at him menacingly, and she had a feeling it wouldn't be an interview the Admiral would enjoy.

She knew there was only one reason why anyone would be interested in her. Just one. She felt McCoy take her hand under the table. It was warm, and he ran his thumb over her knuckles. She felt the panic subside slightly. He knew. He had to know what this meant – and he was still taking her hand. She had never loved a person more in her life.

Jim grinned hard at the men. "Well, thank you gentlemen, for the briefing you've given us. We understand how hard it is for Starfleet to reveal even a few of their secrets to the masses. The ship will be prepared for battle by the time we reach Earth." Chapman clearly wasn't sure what to make of Kirk, so nodded. Brook's face was blank, and Pike looked like he was going to laugh.

"We'll need a word with you – Kirk. I hear that you've got a bit of a situation here on the ship." Pike gave him a significant look, and Jim nodded.

"Well, if you've heard about it, I wonder who else has." He turned to the rest. "Spock – if you could oversee our preparations?"

"Yes sir."

"Excellent. Sulu – the security we discussed…?"

"It's in place, sir."

"Good. Alright, the rest of you, dismissed."

She stood slowly, dropping McCoy's hand. McCoy remained seated, and she noticed Jim was nodding to him. He knew something else. She felt sure of it as he stood up abruptly and approached the captain. Was it to do with the spies on the ship? Or something else entirely?

"Nurse Chapel?" The Illyrian was walking towards her, face severe.

"Plat. You are well?"

"Yes. My thanks." He paused.

"Is there something you need to tell me?" She asked him, feeling something tip her intuition.

"Yes. But know I am bound not to say it." He glanced at the Admirals, clearly torn. Illyrians had a strong sense of honour, similar to Klingons she recalled.

"I see. But you would wish to?"

"Yes. I owe you a debt for freeing my people on Daystrom."

"There is no debt, Plat. Please don't think there is. If I hadn't freed you someone else would have."

"Perhaps. Know this, and remember, Christine Chapel. I will be watching you."

""What do you mean-."

"Come on Chapel, let's go and find my daughter." McCoy interrupted coarsely, and when she turned back to Plat he was talking to Sulu. What had that meant? And why would he need to?

"Of course." She replied smoothly. The time to go to pieces had been and gone. She was far beyond that now.

They walked side-by-side to the sickbay in silence. She wasn't sure she could break it because she wasn't sure what she could say. Joanna was pleased to see them when they entered, and she pushed every thought away and embraced the girl.

"Are you alright?" She looked at her with those big brown eyes, the same as her father's, and she felt something in her shake.

"I'm just fine." She lied. "I see you've been busy."

"Yep. I got to see Nurse Kier's baby. How great is that?" She looked up and noticed that Kier and Zuvolt were both there, chatting with the other staff. Saying goodbye. Kier would leave tomorrow.

"That's lovely."

"It's a boy. Doctor Zuvolt says he's always wanted a son."

"Zuvolt would be happy with whatever he had." McCoy said, somewhat offhandedly. She felt his eyes on her.

"I'm sure he would." She agreed. "I'd best say goodbye." She pulled herself together hard, and took the nurse aside. Kier was in a better mood than she had been for some time, but she still spent almost an hour drying her tears, assuring her of the help available on Earth, and explaining how McCoy was in the process of transferring Zuvolt. She cried when she found that out. Christine didn't blame her.

"Now, I have some things I need to do, Helen. Take as much time as you need here. We're all going to miss you a lot."

"I'll miss you all too." She was crying again, and she had to stop tears coming to her own eyes. They were sending her to Earth because Earth was supposed to be safer. But with what they'd just found out, was it really? "Nurse Chapel, I just wanted to thank you. You've been so good, and so supportive. I wouldn't know what I would have done if you hadn't been Head Nurse."

She hugged her. "You would have done just as good. You're strong, Helen. More than you know. Now make sure you drop in before you leave."

"Yes. Of course."

There were a long list of jobs that needed done on her list, but she left them, and went to the lab. She was feeling… she wasn't sure what she was feeling. She began to check and calibrate the equipment. She needed to clear her mind. She was a professional and she needed a time out. She wasn't sure how long she'd been in there when she felt his eyes on her. She hadn't heard him come in – she'd been absorbed in her work, and the swirling thoughts in her mind. Utopia. Golden eyes. A plan. Roger. The sound of her scanner hitting the floor pulled her to consciousness. She dropped it. She never dropped things.

"Chapel? Are you alright?" His voice was quiet and seemed a long way away.

"Fine." She bent down to pick it up. It was in pieces and she dropped some of them. "Damn it." She whispered. Now she was going to have to put it back together again.

She watched him come towards her, and he bent down and picked up the pieces. Then he took her hand, palm up, and put them on it. She felt his eyes on his face and couldn't meet them. She stared at the pieces on her hand.

"Chapel. Talk to me." He was standing very close. She wouldn't have to move much to be in his arms. But something still made her freeze.

"What about?"

"You know what about."

She took a breath. "Do you think that there are consequences for every action, doctor?" The question that had been in her mind for a long time. The question she'd been too scared to voice.

"Yes." Because she'd known his answer.

"Do you think we can ever leave the past behind?" No matter what she did, no matter how hard she tried, the past always seemed to find her.

"Only sometimes, Chapel." He was moving closer. She could feel the heat of him, the electricity coming off him.

"You know, I've always thought that the past was important. That it makes us into the people we are."

"You're right. It does." He had cupped her cheek.

"But now I don't know whether it makes me strong or weak. Because all I want to do is forget."

"Forgetting doesn't help, Chapel. I've tried forgetting. Sometimes acceptance is the only way."

"I've never been good at that." She admitted.

"That's because you're damn stubborn."

She laughed softly. "I'm stubborn?" Said the most stubborn man she'd ever met.

"Yes you are. And you won't ever let someone help you."

"I don't need any help." He tilted her face to meet his eyes. They were amused and intense. She wondered suddenly what had induced him to reach out to her now, after staying away from her for so long. She was grateful for whatever it was.

"My point exactly. You're good at offering help, but you never accept it."

"Yes I do."

"No you don't." He frowned at her and bit off her next retort. "Stop arguing with me."

She laughed. "She was beginning to feel better, and it wasn't just his hands on her face that were doing it. "You know, I wonder how I managed to get into this mess sometimes."

"Only sometimes? That's my thought every morning."

"I'm just an innocent nurse with an angel-of-mercy complex, trying to keep a sickbay working." She quoted him, smiling. "I wouldn't scare a fly."

"You terrify me." His voice was so earnest that she wasn't sure what to do, because she wanted to kiss him so much it hurt. She dropped the pieces of the scanner again and wrapped her arms around him. He held her back tightly. There was so much unsaid between them. The subjects that neither of them wanted to raise. That she was involved with all this somehow. That the past was coming back to haunt her. That somehow she might have started a war. That she loved him. Instead they stood in silence with the pieces of her scanner round about them.

Finally they broke and she felt shaky for an entirely different reason. Instead of moving away he stroked her face, eyes full of an earnestness she'd never seen before. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you Chapel. I promise."

She wanted to warn him not to make promises that he couldn't keep, but those eyes on hers kept her silent as her heart beat hard. She touched his cheek, and leaned into him.

"Nurse Chapel? Doctor McCoy?" Hylara's voice echoed from his office, and she moved away quickly. She could hear McCoy swearing under his breath, and she didn't dare look at him as Hylara finally reached them. "There you are. Sorry to interrupt and all, but I think you should see this."

McCoy frowned and she followed them both. They heard her voice first – Joanna's high voice and then laughter. The girl was sitting in a chair next to Julie Powell stroking her hair. The Ensign was watching her as she said something animatedly, then laughed softly at her.

McCoy exchanged a surprised look with her – the woman that was laughing at his daughter seemed completely different from the withdrawn, beaten woman that had been in their sickbay for the last day. Clearly Hylara shared that view. So did the security officer that had been assigned to her.

McCoy put a hand on Joanna's shoulder. "Is everything alright?"

Joanna grinned at her father impishly. "Yep. I was talking to Julie. She plays the violin like me. Only she's much, much better."

McCoy glanced at the Ensign. "Well, I'm glad you were able to make a new friend." He gave Julie his half-smile. "I hope my daughter hasn't tired you out."

Julie shook her head and gave him a wary look. "No. She's remarkable."

"She's certainly something." He muttered, giving her an amused look. "How are you feeling?"

The wary look on her face intensified, and for a moment she thought that the woman wouldn't answer. Then Joanna took her hand. "Don't worry Julie. Dad's the best doctor around."

Julie gave her a small smile. "I'm feeling better than I did."

"Good."

A whistle at the wall summoned him, and he frowned and she couldn't mistake the worry in his eyes as he answered it.

"McCoy."

"Doctor, the captain needs you on the bridge."

"I'll be right there." He stood frowning at the wall for several seconds. She joined him slowly as Joanna began chatting to the Ensign again.

"Aren't you meant to be going, doctor?"

"Yes." He turned and frowned at her. What was he worried about?

She handed him a medical pack and gave him a smile. "I'll hold the fort."

He nodded. "I know. Keep an eye on Joanna for me."

"Of course."

He met her eyes. "Chapel?"

"Yes?"

"When I get back we need to have a conversation."

She nodded. "I know." He gave her that smile and she watched him leave, pack in hand, shoulders slouching, hand pushing back untameable hair. There was a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach as she watched him. That feeling of premonition that she couldn't quite shake.

Sixteen minutes later the lights went off.