Chapter 37: Open

Cloud woke up feeling more rested than he had in days. He opened his eyes when he felt an unusual warmth in his bed, and his eyes fell upon a still sleeping Tidus. Cloud sighed softly, and moved in a little closer to that warmth, leaning his head against his companion's muscular shoulder. So, Tidus had spent the whole night here. Perhaps that was what had kept Cloud's nightmares at bay for once. If he'd known that Tidus was the remedy for those awful dreams, he probably would have avoided an empty bed for a while now.

Cloud closed his eyes as he rested there next to Tidus. Honestly, he felt sick about the night before. He'd let Tidus down. Again. Cloud was sure that if he could just get Zack out of his head, things could be different. If he really did find a way to move past all the pain and worry that was so hard to forget, then maybe joining with Tidus—both mentally and physically—would become much easier, but he couldn't blame himself for not letting go. Zack had given him too much.

"G'morning," Tidus yawned, startling Cloud. Cloud raised his head so he could meet Tidus' eyes. He forced a smile.

"Good morning."

"Did ya sleep okay?" Tidus asked, grinning softly.

"Oddly enough, I did," Cloud nodded, his smile becoming a little more natural.

"Good," Tidus beamed. Cloud lay back down and clumsily slung an arm over Tidus' waist, releasing a heavy breath as he began to relax there.

"You working today?"

"As usual," Cloud nodded again. "Can you amuse yourself again while I'm gone?"

"Yeah, I'll be okay," Tidus assured him. His mind flickered to his plan for the day, but he managed to keep a straight face. He couldn't tell Cloud about his intentions. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

"By the look of Tifa's schedule, I'm free for the next few days. I promise we'll spend some time together, okay?"

"Okay," Tidus softly grinned, hoping Cloud would keep his promise. Cloud lifted his head and pressed a kiss to Tidus' lips. Tidus draped a hand over the blankets, and gently caressed Cloud's back through the covers.

"I love you," Cloud whispered, his breath warm against Tidus' skin, and they both smiled, like they'd been needing to hear those words. It was the reassurance they needed that their feelings hadn't changed, just their circumstances had, and it seemed to shrink their list of troubles for the time being.

"I love you, too," came Tidus' half of the sincere vow.

"I'll see you this afternoon," Cloud swore, getting up from the bed. Tidus flopped his head to the side of his pillow, watching as Cloud grabbed his towel, and headed out of the room. Tidus listened for the shower to turn on, then he rushed to Cloud's desk, and began digging for the resources he would need for the day's adventure.

Tidus fumbled his way through the streets of Edge. He kept to himself for the most part, keeping his gaze low as he trekked through the foreign surroundings and passed by new faces. It was strange to see so much poverty among the townspeople. Many were dressed in stained and tattered clothing. Others were curled up in alleyways, as if it was the only home they had.

Few graciously greeted Tidus as he walked by, and Tidus wondered if his vibrant clothing and unfaltering smile made him stand out a little too much amongst the crowd. He had spent most of the morning sifting through Cloud's books and journals, and reading snippets of newspaper articles to try and understand exactly what had gone down here months ago. Taking down Shinra, trying to stop Meteor and Sephiroth... Cloud and his group had been at the heart of it all. Tidus had read about the destruction of Midgar, and how Edge had been built using many materials found in Midgar's remains. It was quite obvious that they had.

Edge was dark and gloomy, not at all what Tidus would expect from a city. His city—his Zanarkand—had been bright, and bustling with people and activity even at night. Here, people were subdued, almost drifting through life, just managing to get by. And for the first time, Tidus wondered if the reason he sometimes had a hard time understanding exactly what it was that made Cloud so sad was because he'd never known Cloud's world. Cloud's whole world was sad, filled with sorrow and destruction. It was no wonder Cloud couldn't always smile when everything around him was so bad. And what was worse, Cloud probably felt he was the cause of it. After all, he hadn't been able to prevent Meteor.

"Excuse me. Is this the way to the highway?" Tidus asked, as he came upon a pleasant-looking young woman.

He pointed to his left to where a set of enormous double-doors rested in the city walls. He was glad he'd found a map in Cloud's desk drawer before setting off on this little journey; otherwise, he was sure he'd have been far more lost than he was now.

"Yes, it is. I wouldn't recommend going that way, though. You know Midgar's nothing but a pile of rubble now, right?" she said, her voice soft, like she wasn't used to talking to people.

"I know," Tidus said, nodding gently. "I guess I just wanna see it for myself."

The girl nodded in response, and watched as Tidus headed for the doors. He took a deep breath before pushing them open and gazing upon the empty highway before him. The sun was just setting over the open road, giving an orange glow to everything in sight. Tidus smiled at the beauty, and assured himself that he was doing the right thing. With courage in his heart, he took the first step onto the highway, and headed for a city long abandoned.

Tidus was relieved when he finally reached his destination in Sector 5. The church looked even more rundown than it had in the picture from Cloud's album. Tidus gazed upon the broken windows and the roof which was completely demolished on the back end. To be honest, he was a little worried about going in alone. It looked like the remains of the roof could come down at any second, but he would never forgive himself if he came this far and didn't venture inside. Besides, according to Tifa, Cloud came here often enough. It had to be fairly safe.

Bravely, Tidus climbed the grey stone steps, but bits of rock crumbled under his boots. The sound of tumbling pebbles echoed around him, piercing the eerie silence. Still, Tidus carried on, and pushed open the church's creaky walnut doors. With slow, careful steps, Tidus entered the church. He gazed first at what was left of the tall ceilings above him, which contained enough holes to make Tidus feel a little uneasy. As he continued to look around, he could see broken pillars near the front of the church. Many of the wooden pews were broken as well. Tidus stopped in his tracks when he recognized the spot in the centre of the church; a large hole in the floorboards was home to a circle of white and yellow flowers. He remembered it from the picture he had seen of Aerith. She had been sitting right there.

Tidus shivered. He felt out of place, like he didn't have a right to be here at all. This was a sacred place, a place where a hero and heroine were to be remembered. Tidus didn't want to think about what Cloud would do if he found out he was here. Tidus wondered if maybe his reason for coming here was crazy in the first place, but he'd experienced a lot of crazy things, both in Spira and with Cosmos. Surely, this couldn't be so strange.

Tidus walked forward until he reached the hole in the floorboards, and he knelt down on the cracked wood. He gazed up above him, the now purple evening sky seeping openly into the broken church roof. Tidus gave a sigh, closed his eyes, and folded his hands in his lap. He felt silly, but this was for Cloud. If there was even a chance it would work, then it was worth it.

"Hey, there, Zack. It's me. Tidus," he started. His eyes flickered open for a moment, and he glanced around him, checking for ghosts, but he was still alone. It wasn't like he was expecting Zack or Aerith to show up, but he hoped more than anything that Zack would at least hear his prayers.

Even back when Tidus had first tried to gain Cloud's trust, back when he had first confessed his feelings to Cloud, Zack had been an obstacle that Cloud just couldn't get over. Even over the months they'd spent together, Cloud's thoughts often returned to Zack, and prevented him from moving forward. Tidus was proud of how far they had come—so proud, he didn't even have the words to describe it—but he didn't want to see Cloud suffer anymore, even if only a little bit. Tidus had confirmed that memories of Zack still managed to hold Cloud back, and ever since he'd looked through Cloud's book of photographs, he'd begun to believe that maybe asking Zack for help was the best way to cure Cloud of those fears and worries that still haunted him.

At this point, he wasn't sure whether or not telling Cloud would be a good idea. He didn't know what Cloud would say to him if he found out. He didn't know if Cloud would understand why he chose to pray to Cloud's deceased partner. It was a strange way of dealing with the problems at hand, but right now, Tidus was desperate for a solution. He wanted Cloud to be happy again. He needed to close the distance between himself and Cloud before they drifted any further apart, and who would Cloud listen to if not Zack?

"You might not know who I am. Well, I guess if you've been watching over Cloud, then maybe you do," Tidus went on. His eyes remained closed, but he listened hard, though he didn't know exactly what for. The wind? A voice? Something to let him know that Zack was hearing him. Nothing interrupted the silence, but Tidus continued anyway.

"Listen, maybe I don't have a right to be praying to you right now, but I need you to know that I care about Cloud, and I know you did, too. Cloud cares pretty deeply for you, too."

Tidus paused, and breathed in deeply as he collected his thoughts. He released that breath slowly, and thought back to Cloud. Cloud's smile, Cloud's laugh. They were rare, but they meant the world to him, and he needed Zack to know that.

"I want to be with Cloud for as long as he'll let me, and I know he wants that, too, but there are things that hold him back. I know he's scared of losing me, and he's scared of letting you go. Zack, I promise you, I will take care of Cloud, but I... I need your help," Tidus said, slowly opening his eyes.

"Zack, if you still care about Cloud, and if you believe that Cloud needs me, then please... Help him let go."

Tidus gently unfolded his hands and got to his feet. He looked up at the sky, which was as still as the church around him. He gave another sigh.

"Thanks, Zack," he whispered. He turned to leave, but gasped when he saw a figure standing in the doorway of the church. A hand leapt to his chest as he stared at the man ahead.

"Tidus?" Cloud asked, a definite crease between his brows as he approached, and Tidus couldn't decide whether it was a sign of concern, disapproval, or plain confusion.

"Gee, Cloud, I didn't expect you to be here, too," Tidus said, with a nervous chuckle. Cloud continued to walk toward him, and Tidus decided it was a sternness in his expression. Tidus lowered his head, expecting he would be scolded any second for coming here.

"How did you find this place?" Cloud asked, frowning. "No, wait. How did you even know about this place?" Tidus tucked his hands behind his back. His fingers tied themselves in knots as he tried to explain himself.

"I, uh..." Tidus started. Cloud raised a brow, and Tidus couldn't come up with a convincing lie quickly enough to fool Cloud.

"I saw it in that photo album you keep on your desk," Tidus admitted, voice low. He dared a glance up at Cloud. Cloud looked a little taken aback.

"You looked through that?"

"I'm sorry. A picture fell out of it when I was helping Tifa look for some work papers. I was curious, and I guess... I got a little carried away." Cloud was silent for a long moment, and he took a few strides toward Aerith's garden before crouching down in front of it. He ran a hand through the flowers, and Tidus felt he had to interrupt the silence.

"Are you mad?" he dared to ask.

"No," Cloud answered, but it was hard to tell whether or not he meant that when his eyes were focused on the ground. "I just... don't usually let people look through it."

"Why not?"

"There are just... a lot of private things in that book. A lot of important memories that I don't like to talk about."

"Not even with me?" Tidus tried.

"Tidus..." Cloud groaned, his eyes still focused on the flowers.

Tidus backed off, but his mind burned; Cloud's words frustrated him. Even now, it seemed Cloud wasn't ready to discuss his past with him. He wasn't willing to familiarize Tidus with his memories, good or bad. Tidus was as helpless as ever, getting nowhere fast with the stubborn chocobo-head.

Both were struck by silence, and eventually, Tidus knelt down beside Cloud, pushing his irritation aside. He knew he had to be patient.

"Are these Aerith's flowers?" he asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah. This was pretty much the only place they grew down here. Aerith, she... She loved them."

"And you love them, too?"

"Mm-hmm," Cloud replied. "They remind me of her. And of Zack." Tidus lowered a hand down into the flowers as well, the petals brushing softly against his fingertips.

"They're nice," he said, softly. Cloud released a small smile, then turned his head toward his partner.

"So, are you gonna tell me what you were doing here?"

"Oh, well, you know," Tidus said, getting up from the flowers and beginning to pace. "I was just lookin' around. Getting a feel for the city, you know?"

"Is that all?" Cloud asked, his eyes following Tidus as he strolled around. Tidus stopped walking, and rubbed the back of his head. There was no sense in trying to hide it. Cloud would find out eventually anyway, because heaven knew Tidus couldn't keep a secret like that.

"And I was praying for you," he admitted.

"Praying for me?" Cloud repeated, with a frown. He stood up, and watched Tidus carefully. "Why?"

"Well, ever since we came to this world, it seems you've had a lot on your mind. I feel like I don't always know how to help, so I thought that coming here might be useful." Tidus was reluctant to meet Cloud's gaze, but when he finally did, he found no anger nor disappointment in Cloud's eyes. Instead, there was a tenderness within them.

"Tidus, that's..." Cloud struggled to find the right words. He was touched. He felt so overwhelmed with astonishment in that moment that it was hard to even speak. "That's really sweet of you."

Tidus' eyes widened in surprise.

"Really?" he dared.

"Yeah," Cloud nodded, eyes gleaming with adoration, expression filled with gratitude.

"Phew, that's a relief!" Tidus sighed heavily, his hands falling to rest on his knees. "I didn't think you'd want me to come here."

"This place is special," Cloud said, taking a few strides toward the door, his eyes on the sky as he walked. He smiled softly as he turned back to Tidus. "But that doesn't mean I mind sharing it."

Cloud raised his arm, his palm open and waiting for Tidus'. Tidus gave him a surprised look, but quickly rushed to Cloud's side and joined hands with him. Tidus returned Cloud's smile with one of his own as they headed for the door.

"What do you say we stop for a bite to eat before we head home?" Cloud offered.

"Sounds great. I'm starving after the long walk here."

"You walked all the way here?" Cloud's eyes were wide as he gazed upon him.

"Yeah. Man, that highway is long," Tidus laughed. Cloud released a soft chuckle.

"So, you won't mind taking the motorcycle back?"

"Not at all!" Tidus grinned, deviously pleased that he would get to ride on the back of Cloud's bike after all.

Tidus followed Cloud into the restaurant, his eyes big and mouth agape as he took in his surroundings. After seeing the other buildings in Edge, Tidus had suspected this place would be a little on the dingy side, but the restaurant's interior was actually quite elegant. The walls were of a light-colored wood, and a chandelier hung from the ceiling. Several booths lined the walls while another few tables were scattered throughout the room, each embellished with red table cloths and small white candles. None of the tables were occupied, leaving Tidus and Cloud as the restaurant's only current customers.

"Table or booth?" a waitress asked, approaching the men.

"Booth, please," Cloud replied, then glanced back at Tidus who still seemed to be in awe.

"Right this way," the girl smiled, leading them to a booth on the left wall. Cloud gave Tidus a gentle nudge to bring him back to the real world, and Tidus released a smile as he followed Cloud to their table.

"Here are your menus," the waitress said, placing the books down on the table as Tidus sat down across from Cloud. "Can I get you some drinks to start?"

"Just water is fine for me," Cloud replied.

"Yeah, me too, please," Tidus nodded. The girl smiled and headed off to the kitchen. Cloud opened his menu, and glanced up at Tidus who was once again scanning his surroundings. He admired Tidus' childlike behaviour.

"You like this place?"

"Oh, yeah. It's just... nothing like the restaurants back home," Tidus replied, his attention snapping back to Cloud again.

"In Zanarkand, you mean?" Cloud's eyes suddenly looked bright with curiosity; he looked genuinely interested in hearing more about Tidus' world, which meant more to Tidus than Cloud would ever know.

"Yeah. They used to be pretty dark inside, but would be all lit up with colored flashing lights," Tidus explained, his hands waving about as he talked.

"Sounds pretty exciting," Cloud replied, with a soft smile.

"It was cool, but I like this place, too. It's nice. Kinda romantic." Cloud ducked his head to hide his growing smile.

"You noticed?" he asked, looking a little embarrassed.

"What? You wanted it to be romantic?" Tidus asked, brows raised.

"Well, it occurred to me that you and I never had a real date," Cloud said.

"That's true," Tidus nodded, eyes wide. With all the monsters, and battles, and fighting, they had honestly never gotten an opportunity. It was certainly about time they had.

"Aw, Cloud, this is sweet of you," Tidus smiled, turning his gaze to the table as he started to feel a bit embarrassed himself. He wasn't used to Cloud being so forward, so brave.

"I just wanted to do something nice for you. I can't say I've been the ideal partner the last few days," Cloud sighed.

"Don't worry about it. You've had a lot on your plate. Speaking of which, what are you going to eat?" Tidus asked, mind returning to his grumbling stomach. Cloud smiled at Tidus before turning his attention back to his open menu.

"This place has the best lasagna."

"Lasagna?" Tidus asked, appearing slightly confused.

"You've never heard of it? It's noodles, cheese, tomato sauce, and meat, unless you get the vegetarian."

"Nah, the meaty version sounds good to me. I'm no stranger to a behemoth stew," Tidus said, closing his own menu and setting it aside.

"Alright," Cloud chuckled, adding his menu to the pile.

The waitress quickly made her way back to the table with a tray, and greeted the men with another friendly smile.

"Here are your drinks," she said, placing the water glasses in front of the two. "Are you ready to order?"

"Yes, we'll each have the lasagna," Cloud replied.

"Well, that's easy enough," the girl smiled, collecting the menus. "I'll be back before too long."

"Oh, and could you light this?" Cloud asked, his index finger tapping against the small, glass centerpiece.

"Of course," the waitress nodded, pulling a lighter from her apron and setting the candle in the centre of the table alight.

"Thank you," Cloud said, as she walked away.

Once she'd left, Tidus' gaze wandered up to meet Cloud's. Ever since they'd left the church, there had been this look in Cloud's eyes: a softness, a certain happiness. Tidus had never imagined that Cloud would be so open about their relationship in public, but for once, Cloud didn't seem to care. In fact, he seemed kind of proud to have Tidus at his side. Tidus wondered if perhaps by going to the church, he'd struck something in Cloud, something to make him feel close to him again.

Tidus felt himself smiling, and averted his gaze; he was sure Cloud would start questioning his silly grin, otherwise. Tidus' eyes scanned the restaurant once more. This time, it wasn't so much the interior that intrigued him, but the fact that absolutely no other customers occupied the other tables. It was a puzzle that Tidus couldn't put together. Here was this beautiful place in an accessible part of town, yet no one was interested in stepping inside?

"It's kinda sad. You'd think there'd be a lot of people in a nice place like this," Tidus spoke up, hoping Cloud might be able to clear up his confusion.

"I guess not a lot of people take advantage of the luxury," Cloud replied, simply.

"Why not?"

"Most of the townsfolk are still trying to rebuild their lives. They don't have the will, nor the means to indulge like this."

"Oh," Tidus nodded, as those pesky pieces fell into place. "And you're one of those people still trying to rebuild. Aren't you?" He saw the way Cloud's eyes briefly grew bigger. Apparently, his conjecture had been spot-on.

"Yeah, I am," Cloud eventually agreed, a soft smile still gracing his lips, which took Tidus by surprise. The Cloud he'd first met in Cosmos' world would never have been able to maintain that smile at a time like this. Tidus reached a hand across the table, and brushed his thumb against Cloud's.

"You know, it's funny. I really wanted to make sure this place stayed afloat. Edge needs a place like this, somewhere people can relax and enjoy themselves. I actually donate regularly to this place to make sure it stays in business," Cloud went on, eyeing the upscale interior.

"Yeah? Doesn't seem like your type of place," Tidus speculated with a slight frown. "N-not that you're not elegant, or anything—"

"I know," Cloud laughed softly. "But I figure someone should enjoy it. The people of this world... have all been through enough."

Cloud appeared to be deep in thought now, probably reflecting on the damages that had been done to this planet, and Tidus was grateful to understand them a little better now. But Cloud was absolutely right when he said he was still one of the people rebuilding their lives after those damages, and Tidus wondered if Cloud might have been among those hit the hardest.

Sure, Cloud still had food and shelter, but he had seen the very worst of the evil in this world, had found its core and fought it, enduring losses along the way. He had been hurt by this planet, from the day he was a sixteen-year-old lab rat to a weary Ex-Shinra employee with freshly recovered memories. He may have saved the world, but he hadn't saved himself from its horrors.

"Cloud, is there anything I can do to make things better? For you?" Tidus asked, his brows falling further into a frown. Cloud sighed lightly.

"I wish I knew."

"I just wish things could go back to the way they were before," Tidus confessed.

"Me, too," Cloud agreed. "It's like, ever since you recovered, I've been waiting for a sign. Anything to tell me that we're gonna be okay, and that it's alright for us to continue down this road. I thought I just needed some time to adjust, or some space to think, but nothing seems to be getting any clearer."

"I get that you need your space sometimes, but... I really don't think we can let this distance between us get any bigger. If it does... I don't think this relationship will work," Tidus admitted, his eyes meeting Cloud's.

There was a look of remorse in those azure eyes now, and Tidus hated that he had been the one to put it there. The only bright side was that those words had made an impact.

"You're right," Cloud nodded, shoving a hand through his hair. "You're right."

"So, what do we do?" Tidus asked. Cloud let out another sigh.

"I don't know."

"Your meals, gentlemen," the waitress announced, as she arrived with their plates. They'd both been so caught up in the conversation, they hadn't heard her emerge from the kitchen.

Tidus withdrew his hand from Cloud's side of the table and shoved it down at his side. It felt cold with the lack of Cloud's warmth, but Cloud's soft smile returned to his face, and Tidus couldn't help but feel better. Cloud really wasn't ashamed to be seen together like this; it was new territory, but Tidus would quickly get on board with it. It was nice to see Cloud this way—just feeling free.

"Looks delicious. Thank you," Cloud said, as the waitress placed their lasagnas in front of them.

"You're welcome," the girl smiled. "Do you need anything else?"

"No, I think this is all for now," Cloud replied, followed by a nod of agreement from Tidus.

"Okay, enjoy."

Tidus stuck a fork into his lasagna as the waitress headed for the kitchen. Steam rose from the hot dish, and Tidus smirked.

"Don't think I'll touch that yet!"

"It does look to be a little on the warm side," Cloud laughed, lightly. They grew silent as they watched the steam swirl in the air. Cloud searched his brain for the magic words that would put Tidus' mind at ease, but they were nowhere to be found. Tidus seemed to know what he was thinking anyway.

"Look, it's okay. I know that me living here is gonna take some getting used to. It's kinda crazy for me, too," Tidus explained, giving Cloud an encouraging smile. Cloud only found himself wanting to apologize. It reminded him that this whole experience was probably hardest on Tidus.

Tidus was the one adjusting to a new homeworld, with new people and places, and customs that were completely unfamiliar to him. And even though he had once voiced that coming here was, in fact, what he wanted, once they had gotten here, Cloud hadn't helped him adjust. He hadn't helped him ease into his surroundings. He hadn't greeted him with affections that would have made settling in much easier. He hadn't even asked if Tidus needed to talk. Like so many times before, Cloud had been the one seeking comfort, while blind to the fact that Tidus was perhaps suffering even more than he was.

"Don't apologize," Tidus knowingly spoke up, before Cloud could start. "I just wanna move past all this and start fixing what we have."

Tidus bravely scooped up a forkful of his hot lasagna and popped it into his mouth. His face lit up with excitement at the foreign but delicious taste.

"Wow, this is good," he beamed.

"Oh, I'm glad you like it," Cloud replied, the corners of his mouth just barely managing a smile. Cloud twirled his fork uncomfortably against his place-mat, his eyes fixed on it just so he could avoid Tidus' forgiving eyes. He didn't feel he deserved forgiveness, not after abandoning Tidus the way he had. He had to make it up to him.

"What we had in Cosmos' world... It was pretty good, wasn't it?" Cloud asked, daring a glance upward.

"Damn right, it was good," Tidus grinned, inhaling another bite of lasagna. Cloud's smile returned at the sound of Tidus' playful voice, and he couldn't help but agree. What they'd had... It had been amazing.

I'll find a way to fix it, Cloud silently swore. Finally, he picked up his fork and dug into his own supper. I don't know where, or how, but I'll find a way. I promise.

"Mm, the food's awfully good, too," Cloud smiled, eyes looking up from his plate to meet Tidus'.

"Delicious," Tidus agreed, slurping a noodle off of his fork. He watched as Cloud happily took another bite.

"Tidus?" Cloud asked, as if he didn't already have his partner's attention. Tidus nodded for him to continue. "I really appreciate what you did for me in that church. I don't know if... anyone's ever prayed for me before."

"Oh, that," Tidus shrugged, timidly. "It was nothing. In fact, I... I thought you might be mad."

"Mad?" Cloud questioned. He couldn't imagine why Tidus would think such a thing, not after all they'd been through. Cloud shook his head. "No. You just had the courage to do what I never could."

"You were afraid to pray?" Tidus frowned. "Why?"

Cloud hesitated. He held his fork upright in the middle of his plate, holding it still at first, then spinning it around in a pool of tomato sauce as he tried to find the answer to Tidus' question. To both his and Tidus' surprise, he gave a soft smile as he responded.

"I guess I was afraid of the result."

Tidus pondered on that for a moment as Cloud returned to his meal. Had Cloud never prayed because he didn't feel he deserved to ask for guidance? Had he been afraid of what Zack or Aerith might tell him? Or had he been scared he wouldn't receive any comfort at all?

"Regardless, I do appreciate it. It really shows you care," Cloud went on, hoping to ease that wary look off of Tidus' face. His mission was easily accomplished. As Tidus caught sight of his gentle smile, he, too, began to grin, and stuffed another mouthful of food into his mouth.

"Well, you got that right! I sure do care," he assured Cloud. He was relieved to know that his visit to the church had meant something to him, that it had actually pleased him.

"I know you do, love. And so do I," Cloud smiled, softly, and watched as Tidus reddened at the nickname. "Oh, and Tidus?"

Tidus looked up only slightly, as he was still trying to conceal his burning cheeks. That look alone, though, still let Cloud know he was listening.

"It's nice to see you back in your old clothes. You look good," Cloud smiled, though it quickly twisted into a smirk, like he knew he was embarrassing Tidus even more by the minute with each endearing comment, but he felt the need to say it.

Seeing Tidus in his blitzball uniform again, in those clothes he'd worn during their long, arduous journey made him remember where they had begun, and he treasured each memory individually as they raced through his brain on fast-forward—Tidus holding him close as he recovered from his battle with Sephiroth, linking their hands as they hurried back from the lake in the pouring rain, watching Tidus gracefully set the white lily afloat for his mother, even just talking and laughing with each other. Cloud adored each memory, and swore to himself he would never let himself forget. Not this time.

"Stop that," Tidus mumbled, sheepishly. "The waitress is gonna think I have a fever."

Cloud scanned Tidus' red face, and let out a wholehearted laugh, leaving Tidus unable to keep from grinning. He supposed that seeing Cloud so happy, even at his expense, was worth it. Watching those glowing eyes that finally held more joy than sadness... Yeah. Totally worth it.

A peaceful silence hung over Seventh Heaven when darkness blanketed the sky that night. Marlene's soft snores carried through from her bedroom, Tifa was enveloped in pleasant dreams, and Cloud lay close against Tidus' warmth. The window in Cloud's room was open, and a warm summer breeze drifted in, tossing the curtains around gently.

Cloud's eyes flew open at the sound of movement. He immediately sat up, the blankets falling away from his bare chest. He looked to his left where Tidus was still soundly sleeping on his stomach, his arms folded up near his pillow and his head resting on them. Cloud scanned the room. His breathing stopped mid-inhale when he saw a figure near his dresser. He continued to hold his breath, and carefully got up from the bed, hoping to sneak up on his intruder. The figure turned to face him, and Cloud's heart skipped a beat, as he was sure his eyes must have been failing him.

There stood his beautiful, smiling Zack, each of his features as clear and perfect as he remembered. He was flawless, and Cloud knew that this was no manikin, nor ghost. This was him. This was his Zack. Cloud went to speak, but his voice didn't work as quickly as he'd hoped it would.

"Nice place you've got here. Did you decorate?" Zack asked, with a cheery smile, running a finger along one of the dusty picture frames that stood atop Cloud's dresser, leaving an obvious clean line in the middle of the dirt; inside the frame was a picture of Cloud and his companions who had accompanied him on his mission to stop Shinra and Sephiroth.

"Zack?" Cloud asked, uncertainly, not wanting to get his hopes up if this was another dream; most of his dreams seemed to end in tragedy lately. Zack looked at him and smiled again, cocking his head to the side.

"Yeah?"

"Am I dreaming?" Cloud asked weakly, feeling like his feet might sink into the floor at any second. He honestly couldn't say for sure whether or not this felt like a dream. Normally, Zack didn't talk directly to him in dreams, not in the moment like this. Zack took a few steps past Cloud, toward the bed.

"Um, yeah. Well, one of you is dreaming, anyway," Zack explained.

"Huh?" Cloud turned around and watched Zack approach the bed and stare at its occupants. Cloud could see himself and Tidus still asleep. An out of body experience? No, he wasn't quite sure what this was.

"What?" Cloud demanded, patting his arms to make sure he really was standing next to the dresser, then he shivered.

When Zack laughed, Cloud realized there must really be two of him. He tried not to let that bother him, and instead focused on the fact that Zack was here with him. He took a few steps forward and stood beside Zack, watching the two sleeping forms, just as Zack was.

"So, that's him. Tidus," Zack said, as if he were determining how that name felt on his tongue. "You two look like quite the couple."

Cloud felt his face grow warm. The Cloud that was in the bed was lying on his side. Tidus was cuddled in close now, his face resting between Cloud's bare shoulder blades, and one of his arms draped loosely around Cloud's waist atop the covers.

"I-it's not like that. He just doesn't like me to feel alone," Cloud lied, though as soon as he said it, he knew how ridiculous it sounded. As if Zack was going to believe that, with the way Tidus was snuggled in against him. He was pretty sure Zack could see right through him anyway.

"Yeah, and I don't think you like to be alone anymore," Zack said, touching Cloud's shoulder and gently turning him to face him. Cloud closed his eyes, the shock of feeling Zack's touch after all this time taking him off guard. He allowed Zack to stroke his shoulder with his thumb.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"That's kind of why I'm here," Zack whispered back. He waited for Cloud to open his eyes again before he continued to speak.

"You don't have to hold yourself back because of me. I know you love him, and that's okay," Zack said. Cloud's hesitant eyes reached Zack's own and Zack gave Cloud a reassuring smile.

"It is?" Cloud asked, feeling so unsure. "You're really okay with it?"

"He makes you happy. That's all I've ever wanted for you," Zack promised. Cloud fought against a tearful smile. Zack's own smile faltered, and his expression grew into one of concern as he watched Cloud try to hide his emotions.

"It's the guilt, isn't it? You living on without me?" Zack asked. Cloud nodded, solemnly.

"Cloud, sweetie, you've gotta let that go." Zack's voice was velvety, more smooth and sweet than Cloud's memories had given it credit for.

"You say it like it's easy," Cloud said, a slight fierceness to his voice. "Zack, it's not easy."

"I know it's not," Zack assured him, his gentle hand never leaving Cloud's shoulder. "But I want this for you, and I know you don't want to let him go. You shouldn't let him go."

"Zack," Cloud whimpered, closing his eyes. He loathed the tear that threatened to roll down his cheek. "I wish that was all that was stopping me, but it's not. There have been so many close calls, so many times he ended up getting hurt. We nearly ended up in different worlds. Zack, what if I lose him, too?"

When Cloud's eyes opened again, they stared up at Zack, begging for an honest answer. His eyes delved deep into Zack's nearly identical ones, but as Zack's bravery stared back at him, he felt his gaze wander down to the scar on Zack's left cheek—just another reminder of how easily accidents could happen. Zack's hand remained firmly on Cloud's shoulder.

"I know you're scared. That's understandable, but not all love stories end as tragically as ours did," Zack said, a slight frown on his face. Those words pierced Cloud's heart like a needle. He managed a nod, but he was still too stunned by the potent comment to be convinced.

"I think I dream too much," Cloud mumbled, and Zack squinted.

"What do you mean? Right now?"

"No, always. I dream about Tidus' death, and your death, and... I dream about Sephiroth, telling me things like, 'Trouble will always follow you. Wherever you go.' And all my life, that's been par for the course. Trouble does follow me. Zack, am I... cursed?" Cloud choked out. Zack shook his head, smiling softly.

"No, silly, you're not cursed. I know a lot of stuff happened, and a lot of it was not good, but I think you got stuck dwelling on everything that went wrong. I mean, a lot of things went right, too, didn't they?" Zack reminded him, nodding in Tidus' direction.

Cloud glanced at the bed, eyeing the couple laying there peacefully, and still trying not to be freaked out by the doppelganger in his bed. Or was he himself the doppelganger? He sighed and gave up trying to figure that out.

"So, what? Are we in the clear now? Are we safe?"

"Hey, I'm not saying there aren't going to be hard times, but Cloud, buddy, I'm gonna be watching over you two. I have been all along," Zack smiled at his tearful former lover.

"You have? Really?" Cloud blinked in surprise, elated that he hadn't been imagining Zack's presence around him, that his guidance was real. Zack nodded.

Cloud didn't know where to begin sorting through his thoughts, trying to recall all the times where Zack might have interfered to save them. With Sephiroth, with the manikins, maybe even with bringing Tidus here. But Cloud didn't want to ask. He just wanted to imagine.

"And you'll... protect us?" Cloud frowned.

"Aerith and I have been doing a good job so far, right? We're on your side," Zack promised.

Cloud stifled a sob as Zack pulled him into his arms, and for the last time—somehow, he just knew this would be the last time—he nuzzled his face in against Zack's chest, the material of his SOLDIER uniform soft against his face.

"So, what do I do?" Cloud asked, his arms lacing around Zack's back.

"There's only one thing you have to do, and I know it's hard," Zack whispered.

"What is it?" Cloud looked up at Zack, fresh tears ebbing at the corners of his eyes.

"You've gotta let go if you want to let him in. Cloud, you have to let your guard down." Zack released Cloud from his hold, ending the embrace.

"But, how do I—?"

"You can't be afraid anymore, okay? Don't worry about me. Don't worry about him. Just open yourself up. Just let yourself love," Zack explained, though in Cloud's opinion, that answer was still far too vague.

"But what about—?" Cloud cut off as Zack flinched. Cloud's eyes grew wide, a nauseating feeling settling in his stomach at the mere thought that Zack might be in pain. "Wh-what's wrong?"

"Ah, sorry, time's almost up for me. Cloud, just remember. You can't improve the past, but you can build a wonderful future. Or something like that. Angeal used to say those sorts of lame things all the time," Zack chuckled. "But, you know, I think there's some truth to them, too."

He backed up a few steps, and took one last glance around the room as he headed for the door.

"Zack—" Cloud choked out, eyes huge and fearful as he realized their parting was coming much too soon. Zack turned once more to give Cloud a parting wave.

"You two take care of each other, okay?" he smiled.

Cloud awoke with a start, his breathing hard and uneven. He sat up, panting, a hand rising to his chest. He could feel his heart thudding painfully against his fingertips. He looked quickly around the room, but his beloved Zack was nowhere in sight. His eyes remained locked on that spot where Zack had recently stood, by the dresser, near the door through which he had taken his leave. Cloud's gaze wandered to the picture frame that Zack had so delicately touched, only to be hit with the realization that his vivid dream had in fact been real.

There on the frame was a clean stripe amidst the surrounding dust, where Zack had dragged his finger across the dirty glass. So, Zack had found a way to physically visit him? Only to leave him again? Cloud felt panicked for a moment, heart threatening to fill with a deep, dark loneliness, until he looked down and saw Tidus sleeping in the exact same position as he had been in his dream.

That's right. He still had Tidus. Cloud's concerns dwindled as he breathed a sigh, and slunk back down under the covers. He rolled onto his side to face Tidus, suddenly feeling a little cold. He was shaking, and he wasn't sure whether it was from the breeze or from the vivid vision he'd just had. He scooted in close and tucked his head in under Tidus' chin.

"Cloud?" Tidus asked, sleepily. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," Cloud replied in a trembling voice, as Tidus' arms readjusted themselves around his waist. He closed his eyes and returned the embrace. The sign that Cloud had so long been waiting for... The sign to let him know that everything would be okay... Perhaps Zack had been it.

As the young men settled in close to one another, Cloud found his mind wandering back to his times with Tidus, right back to the first time he'd found out Tidus had feelings for him. Back then, seeing this far ahead had been impossible. He would have never imagined that months later, he would be here, more in love with Tidus than he'd ever believed he could be.

Early on, he hadn't known of Tidus' patience, of his kindness. He hadn't been rescued by Tidus time and again. He'd never needed to place his trust in Tidus, but he had since learned how soothing it was to do so. Now, all he wanted to do was be immersed in all those things. He wanted to indulge in all the amazing things Tidus did, and said, and was.

That was what Zack wanted. Cloud knew that now. And for the first time since that day on the cliff five years ago, Cloud understood those dying words that Zack had said to him. Zack had made him vow to live for the both of them, but he had never meant for that to be a weight on Cloud's shoulders. He had meant for it to be freeing, for Cloud to live every day to the fullest, and experience everything life had to offer. He'd wanted Cloud to experience enough happiness for two lives, and from this moment on, Cloud swore to himself he would do just that.

"Yeah," Cloud said, again, feeling and sounding even more confident this time. "Everything's... alright."

A/N: Okay, I didn't post this note originally, but I thought I'd better add it. The next chapter will be the last full chapter of this story (followed by a short epilogue). I was going to leave it as a surprise, but then I decided it was cruel to spring this on people, like, "Yep, this is the last chapter. Enjoy while you can." So, here's your advanced warning. Don't forget your handkerchiefs and fuzzy blankets for the next chapter; it might be emotion overload, haha. Until next time!