'I want to hold you close
Relax me with your kisses
I know you're waiting for me
I just have to be brave'


Elsa had always longed to spend quality time with her parents. To talk to them, have them listen to her, and be open with each other. Now that it was happening, she had no idea how to act or what to say. She could only sway her legs back and forth under the chair she was sitting on.

It was her father who asked for a talk, yet her mother was also present. It didn't surprise her. Somehow, she expected it. But that didn't make it any more bearable. The three of them had been silent since stepping out of the house, watching the teenagers from other households run and enjoy Christmas' arrival.

"How are you?" Her father asked in Coronian, surprising Elsa. Whenever they would call by phone or Skype since they moved away without her, they never spoke in their own provincial accent.

"The truth?" Elsa looked at her parents when they didn't respond. "I'm happy because I have people who accept me for who I am."

"Elsa," her mother whispered.

"Why did you come?"

"We wanted to see you." It was her father who had the courage to answer. "...and to apologize."

The moment those words were uttered, there was a loud ringing in Elsa's ears. Her breathing halted for a moment too long and her eyes went completely unseeing. It shouldn't have come as a massive shock since her parents were already acting abnormally since they'd arrived, but it surprised her nonetheless.

"I know we've been... terrible parents," her mother continued. "You were always lively as a child, and all this time, I... I thought you were okay with our arrangement." There was a shuddering breath before a hand landed on top of Elsa's, jolting her awake from the shock. "Why didn't you tell us?"

Queenie's hands were trembling and freezing and Elsa forced herself to think it was simply because of the cold. It was a white Christmas.

Slowly releasing the breath she had been holding, Elsa whispered, "You were already stressed. I didn't want to add to the burden because of a childish... jealousy." She shut her eyes as if it could shield her from the shame and guilt of feeling those emotions back then. "I wanted to take care of her. I wanted us to do it together, but... it was lonely."

The last thing Elsa wanted was to break down in front of her parents. She was slowly coming to the realization that it was almost impossible not to. Even when she wasn't looking at them, she could hear the strangled breaths and wet pops of their breathing. They were crying, and it was difficult not to herself. She opened her eyes again to take in the sight outside her family's porch.

Her hometown.

Corona.

It was where she had been born and raised. It was where they'd left her. Elsa wanted to get angry, to ask why they had to do what they did, but she was only capable of feeling regret and pain. Regret that they couldn't be a happy family before and pain because it was impossible to be a complete family now that Cindy was gone.

"I'm sorry," Queenie sobbed. "You were right. We know nothing about you and it's making me angry at myself. We were supposed to be here for you."

"I'm sorry for being weak," King whispered. "For letting our emotions blind us. Because of our own selfishness, we left you here alone. And we... we ended up hurting you again."

"We're sorry for forcing Cindy's life on you, Elsa." Queenie faced her daughter. "I-I'm sorry that you had us as your parents. I'm sorry for hurting you, for not spending time with you when you were a child. I'm sorry for being a terrible mother. I'm sorry."

Every apology that slipped from her parents' lips served as sharp stabs in the chest. It was crazy how hearing them apologize made Elsa feel worse. She understood very well where they were coming from. The hurt, the fear, and the desperation to be forgiven were emotions she was well-accustomed to. She had been living her life for nearly four years with them.

It started when Cindy died.

Letting go was difficult. It was impossible to put into words the emotions she had felt when she lost her sister, to explain how empty life seemed to be the moment Cindy died. They had always been together. They knew each other as they knew themselves and even when they were separated, it was easy to know when the other was sad, angry, or happy. They were each other's half. And Elsa... was the only one left.

"Elsa." Her father knelt in front of her and held both her hands in a comforting grip. "When we said that we love you equally, we were serious. I know we weren't able to show it, but we feel it. You are our daughter, too, and nothing will ever change that."

"Don't ever think that you are Cindy's replacement because you're not." Queenie placed her hand on top of her husband's. "I know these are just words, but they're the truth."

It was frightening. Elsa couldn't remember ever being this terrified of her parents. She was afraid because she believed every word. That tiny spark of hope was slowly building into a raging inferno and it was futile to even try keeping it small. She was afraid to trust them completely because she had been hurt for a long time, and yet, the spark was undoubtedly very strong that even after seventeen years, it never vanished.

"We know we've wasted years." King squeezed her hand with a firm gentleness. "But we want to start over. We're going to do it right this time, not because Cindy's not here anymore, but because we love you and we want to show you how much we do."

"Please give us another chance," Queenie pleaded.

One look at her parents and Elsa knew they were being honest. But it wasn't easy. Her mind screamed no. She knew there will come a time when they would compare her to Cindy again. It was inevitable. She wanted to trust them, but she didn't know how.

"I'm scared," she eventually whimpered. "I want to believe you, but I'm scared. I know that she was the better twin. I know it's easy to compare us." Elsa removed her hands from underneath her parents' and vainly wiped her eyes. "But it... it hurts because I... I love you so much."


Both of Marshall's hands covered his face while he was crouched over on the loveseat. Ariel was rubbing comforting circles on his back and would stop him whenever he insisted to go outside where his parents and Elsa were. Anna wanted to go out there as much as he did, but if he who deserved to be out there was restraining himself, she had to show some decorum.

Kristoff lifted up a sleeping Alice. "I'll tuck her in."

As soon as everyone gave their acknowledgments, Kristoff and Charlotte went to deal with their daughter. The other adults were having a conversation on their own somewhere while the 'kids' wasted their time in the living room, wondering what was going on outside that front door.

"Can't you check?" Senya asked.

"I want to, but Dad asked me to leave them alone." Olaf bit his thumb. "They're still my aunt and uncle."

Meanwhile, Rapunzel was leaning against the arm of the sofa and absently twirling a loose string with her finger. She and Anna were the ones farthest from the front doors. The brunette's reasons were unknown, but Anna decided to stay this far away because she was afraid that if she was close enough, the urge to open that door would be too strong to resist.

"Hey." The soft-spoken voice ironically surprised Anna. "I... passed by Elsa's mother when I left you. Did she...?"

The question, though unspoken, beneath those green eyes burned right through Anna's head. Anna eyed the other occupants in the room to make sure that no one could hear them before answering the unfinished question. "We talked," she confirmed. "She wasn't rude or anything. She just asked about Elsa. How she was doing and the whole girlfriend thing."

Rapunzel groaned and plopped her head on the armrest. "I seriously messed it up, didn't I?"

"Maybe. I cleared it up, but I didn't deny my feelings."

"Really?"

"There's no point, right? They'll know either way. Everyone's not being discreet about it." Anna paused and lowered her head after realizing how rude that came out. "Sorry."

Rapunzel didn't say anything and Anna just knew she'd offended her. She swallowed past the dryness of her throat, wanting but not knowing how to change the topic and act nonchalant. Before she even had the chance to, Marshall spoke over the fragile air.

"You guys." He removed his hands from his red face. "I-If you want to sleep, you can go."

"I'm worried, Mars. Even if I go, I won't be able to sleep," Olaf said.

"Why don't we grab ourselves some water to calm down?" Senya suggested to the exhausted group of people. They had been decorating and working nonstop for the entire day and it was a miracle they were still functioning this late at night.

"I'll stay," Marshall insisted.

"Mars, it won't do anyone any good if we stay here worrying," Ariel chided. "I know you're anxious, but you're tired. If you don't want to sleep, at least drink something to calm down."

A moment of contemplative silence and Marshall gave in. Senya didn't need to convince Olaf because he was already on his way to the kitchen. Anna followed the group, hyper-aware of Rapunzel tailing them at a reasonable distance.

"Guys, can we chill? It's already heavy enough as it is." Rapunzel grabbed a pitcher of water from inside the fridge. "It's supposed to be a happy occasion."

Olaf grabbed a few glasses and settled them on the table. "We don't know what's going on out there. It could be a happy occasion for all we know." The slight quiver in his voice slipped through his optimism. "We can only wait and see."

"Right," Rapunzel agreed half-heartedly and poured water into everyone's glass.

"What do you think, Mars?" Olaf turned to his cousin. "Do you have any idea what's going on out there?"

"I want to think they're making it up to her." Marshall fiddled with his glass. "When Elsa moved out, they were miserable. Mom was crying every day and Dad would often spend time alone in the backyard."

"Do you think it's real?"

"Olaf!" Senya chastised.

"I want to make sure, Sen. You've seen how Elsa was these last few years. I don't want her to go through that again. I don't want them to give her any false hopes only to crush them again later."

"So do I, but Marshall is her brother."

Truthfully, Anna shared the same sentiment as Olaf. She felt the same way even if she wasn't there during those times. However, she couldn't pin the blame on Marshall either. He was only a freshman in high school when it happened and it was obvious that he regretted it.

"I do," Marshall answered. "Because it was the first time I saw them cry again after Cindy died."

Everyone held their breaths when the cousins never broke their heated eye contact, half expecting them to throw a punch and get it over with. Olaf was the one who caved in, letting out a lengthy, exhausted and partly relieved sigh. "I see."

The girls let out their breaths, glad that nothing happened.

Senya walked over to the drawers. "I'll make some coffee."

Rapunzel shared the pitcher with everyone but Anna, who politely rejected in favor of helping Senya make coffee. After feeling the tension between Marshall and Olaf, she suspected that water wasn't going to do much in helping her relax.

Senya eyed the black liquid in Anna's mug. "Are you sure you don't want cream with that?"

"I'm sure."

The musician offered the coffee she made to the others while Anna leaned on the kitchen counter and tried to steady her grip on the mug handle. She took a sip and her brows instantly drew together as the bitter taste nestled on her tongue.

Rapunzel cringed. "How can you drink that?"

"I—" Anna cleared her throat. "I'm in the mood for coffee, I guess."

"Oh come on, you obviously want to spit it out! Just add cream and sugar to it!"

"It's fine."

Anna ignored how everyone shook their heads and giggled at her stubbornness. When her eyes met Rapunzel's bright green ones again, her stomach did a flip and she had to quickly distract herself by drinking the demonic mug of scalding black coffee. The glint in those eyes was unnerving. It was too observant.

Like Rapunzel could see right through her.

They spent their time distracting themselves with topics unrelated to Elsa or the possible scenarios happening outside.

After a considerable amount of time and having finished drinking coffee, Anna placed the newly-washed mug on the drainer and wiped her hands with the towel. Marshall's head was leaning on his arms that were resting on the counter, Rapunzel had fallen asleep sometime during a random conversation, and Ariel was slowly dozing off, barely fighting back the lull of sleep.

"You should rest," Olaf suggested.

"You mean 'we'," Senya rectified. "We've been here for a long time. Elsa could already be in her room."

"Aren't you two sleepy?" Anna asked, curious as to why they were both wide awake.

Olaf shrugged. "We're used to pulling all-nighters. It comes with the job."

"Oh, right." Anna rubbed the bridge of her nose to ease a rising headache. She was tired. "Elsa and Rapz mentioned something about you bringing their supposed-business to life."

Senya tilted her head. "Oh?"

"I... heard Elsa's editing videos." Anna didn't know what pushed her to say that, but when the two fidgeted in their seats, she decided to continue. "I didn't tell her."

"I'm really sorry, Anna," Olaf apologized. "I ju—"

"She told me why she can't go back to music. I didn't ask. I don't even know why she told me. She just did. I... I can't bring myself to tell her about my brother after hearing about it."

"Do you pity her?"

"What? No!" Anna lowered her hands to the kitchen island. "Maybe I'll tell her when things get lighter. For now, I- If Hans finds out, he's going to be relentless. He already is even without knowing about her."

"I agree," Senya murmured. "Are you willing to go that far? We're talking about your brother here."

"This isn't what she needs right now. She hasn't even admitted to me about being Chelsea yet. I don't want to speak for her. She'll tell me when she's ready."

Olaf's face softened. "You have your own problems, don't you?"

Anna hoped her smile didn't look strange. Her mind had been made up since she found out about Cindy, but it didn't excuse her from feeling like the worst sister ever. She was keeping the very information Hans wanted her to find since a year ago.

"Rapz." Senya shook her younger sister. "Rapz, the room is upstairs."

"Go away." The younger brunette sluggishly slapped away the disturbance. Senya wasn't deterred and shook harder than her previous attempt. "Ugh. I'm up, I'm up!" Rapunzel groaned and forced herself upright with great effort, covering her face and releasing a massive yawn, before leaving on wobbly legs.

Anna tapped her cousin's shoulders. "You'll sleep better in Elsa's room," she said, glad that Ariel was easy to wake. After rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, Ariel mumbled apologies as she went ahead.

Olaf took the liberty of waking Marshall and telling him to retire to his room. It was then that Anna wondered where Senya was sleeping. She wasn't sharing Elsa's room and it didn't look like she was sleeping in Olaf's either. Anna was half tempted to ask when the very same woman broke her train of thoughts.

"You should go to sleep, Anna."

"I don't know. I don't think I can."

"Just try, okay? Lie down and close your eyes. Elsa wouldn't want to see you exhausted while waiting for her." Senya smiled when Anna worried her bottom lip. "Just try. I'll be fixing some of the loose decorations in the living room. We lost track of the things when we started dancing and singing earlier."

The musician excused herself to the living room. Having nothing else to do, Anna followed after her and saw how messy the room was. How did I not notice? Feeling bad about leaving the woman alone to deal with this, Anna was about to lend a hand when Senya gave a stern look. She surrendered to her fate after that and went upstairs, changed out of her clothes, and released her hair from their braids.

Ariel and Rapunzel were sound asleep on the mattress by the floor.

With an exhausted sigh, Anna went to take one side of Elsa's bed. As soft and fluffy as it was, she had a hard time finding a comfortable position and catch even a wink of sleep. Uneasy thoughts spun inside her head and she knew she wouldn't be able to calm down until she had an assurance that Elsa was okay.

After what felt like a few hours of turning and shuffling, Anna was startled back to her senses when she heard the door open. The whispered worries and negativities in her head quieted and she held her breath in order to concentrate better on the sound. The door closed softly once more and was followed by soft, careful footsteps. As soon as the bed shifted, Anna bristled and lifted her head to see a person's silhouette.

"S-Sorry. Did I wake you?"

It was Elsa.

"No." Anna hoisted herself up to get a clearer view. The quiver in Elsa's voice was alarming. "No, I was awake."

From what little light graced the room, Anna saw Elsa's chest heave in a way someone's chest would when holding back on crying. Without a second thought and acting solely on instinct, she grabbed the back of Elsa's head and pulled her close.

Her heart split in half when she heard a strangled sob. Elsa's trembling hands wrapped firmly around her shirt enough that they dug into her skin. Despite the pain, Anna didn't complain. She placed a hand protectively on the back of the platinum blonde tresses and tucked her into the crook of her neck. She didn't know if these were tears of relief or sadness, but Elsa was crying and she needed to do something.

"I'm here." She pressed her lips to the top of Elsa's head. "I'm here, Elsa. I got you."

The grip on her waist tightened. Anna accepted the gesture because she didn't need to hear anything. As long as Elsa could cry as much as she needed to and release the pent-up frustrations if she had them, she was willing to wait until Elsa was ready. Even if it killed her, she would listen to these sobs and cries with no complaints because she knew from firsthand experience how it felt to cry without having a shoulder to lean on.


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